My pedicure.

By *opsy Rogers OP Woman over a year ago

London

So as not to ruin my expensive hold ups tomorrow night, I'm having me feet done. First time ever.

She's asked me what the occasion is. What shall I tell her?

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

That you are a floozy who meets men off the internet for flithy kinky sex.

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yes, but make sure she doesn't have any sharp implements in her hand when you do

By *Ryan-Man over a year ago

In Your Bush

Tell em you are making your own wine, and can't be mushing grapes with hooves

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Tell em you are making your own wine, and can't be mushing grapes with hooves

By *opsy Rogers OP Woman over a year ago

London

She's doesn't think I'm a floozy, she thinks in insane!

By *empting Devil.Woman over a year ago

Sheffield

A getogether with friends from an internet forum.

She may assume it's mumsnet.

If not pick a subject (ie the minion knitting and crochet pattern swapping society) and say that.

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Tell her you are having your feet worshipped by a man and you don't want to shred the inside of his mouth with hobbit toenails

By *opsy Rogers OP Woman over a year ago

London

"Tell her you are having your feet worshipped by a man and you don't want to shred the inside of his mouth with hobbit toenails

My favourite so far.

By *opsy Rogers OP Woman over a year ago

London

I now have pretty toes and soft feet and when I put my tights back on, I think I entertained a couple of delivery drivers.

I've never seen granny pants and thick tights get such a reaction before.

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Tell her your going to a feet appreciation swingers party