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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Not sure whether to post this here or in one of the other threads, but as its a general discussion and people posting their views/opinions across. I thought I'd post it here instead.
Anyway my question are:
To all those people who aren't completely straight. In terms of your relationships with your family. What is your relationship like with them now as well as when you were growing up?
Also before you discovered and made up your mind of what you were. How were you treated as a child, into your teens and even young adulthood?
Also in your opinion. Is your sexuality all down to sexual urges/intimate emotions or is it all about love, etc? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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hmmm I don't really think relationships as youngsters effects what we are attracted to.
It may well affect how we behave in relationships or maybe leads people to feel guilty or 'suppress' their feelings etc but don't think effects *what* |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had relations with girls from many nations
I've made passes at women of all classes
And just because you're gay I won't turn you away
If you stick around I'm sure that we can find some common ground
Sexuality - Don't threaten me with misery
Sexuality - I demand equality
Sexuality - Strong and warm and wild and free
Sexuality - Your laws do not apply to me
Sexuality - Come eat and drink and sleep with me
Sexuality - We can be what we want to be
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Basically I have noticed from the people I have seen that gays have had or do the following.
1. They seriously don't get on with one particular parent (father normally) or they just may be absent a lot.
2. They were bullied and beaten a lot as a child.
3. When they announce who their partner is they are normally a lot older or a lot younger.
4. It may sound hypocritical. Unless its a feminist thing, but I believe that if a guy does anything sexually to another guy. Even a kiss or is wanting this from a guy. Them they are guy. I say its hypocritical as I think women kissing isn't gay. More of having a laugh, but obviously anything more and I would think of them as gay. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My family don't know I'm bisexual...I could never see myself in a relationship with another woman. I fancy women, and love having fun with other ladies, but don't think I'd ever fall in love with a woman. Seeing as I don't tell my family about everyone I sleep with, it's never come up.
If any of them asked, I'd be honest and I'm fairly positive it wouldn't make the slightest difference to how they treated me or viewed me! |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Basically I have noticed from the people I have seen that gays have had or do the following.
1. They seriously don't get on with one particular parent (father normally) or they just may be absent a lot.
2. They were bullied and beaten a lot as a child.
3. When they announce who their partner is they are normally a lot older or a lot younger.
4. It may sound hypocritical. Unless its a feminist thing, but I believe that if a guy does anything sexually to another guy. Even a kiss or is wanting this from a guy. Them they are guy. I say its hypocritical as I think women kissing isn't gay. More of having a laugh, but obviously anything more and I would think of them as gay. "
Crazed, I've seen you post some  and  things but this really takes the prize.
How big is your data set? How many gay people have you spoken to in depth about their relationship with their parents, their childhood and the age of their partner, if they have one? Are your observations the same for gay men and gay women?
This may be based on your observations but I don't think you can generalise like this and I'm not sure what you're trying to say in doing so..
As for men being gay if they want to do anything sexual with another man, where does bi and bi-curious fit into that? What if they try it once and decide it's not for them?
I don't think a lot of gay people would agree with you, or thank you, for suggesting they were abused children with dysfunctional families.
As for your belief that women kissing other women is "having a laugh", I'm quite honestly speechless. Oh, and again you have completely overlooked the possibility of them being bi.
Your posts kind of come across as you thinking there's something "wrong" with gay men and that something bad must have happened to them as children to make them that way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Basically I have noticed from the people I have seen that gays have had or do the following.
1. They seriously don't get on with one particular parent (father normally) or they just may be absent a lot.
2. They were bullied and beaten a lot as a child.
3. When they announce who their partner is they are normally a lot older or a lot younger.
4. It may sound hypocritical. Unless its a feminist thing, but I believe that if a guy does anything sexually to another guy. Even a kiss or is wanting this from a guy. Them they are guy. I say its hypocritical as I think women kissing isn't gay. More of having a laugh, but obviously anything more and I would think of them as gay. "
1. I got on with my father and mother very well as much as you can for a only child with older parents than the norm. my father more than my mother I guess as I spent a lot of time with him.
2/3 My oh is 5 years older than me I'm with him because I was in love not because of anything else.
4. If a man kisses a man and a woman kisses a woman so what who cares. Each to their own
Hope I've not misunderstood any of this if I have its because Im awake at stupid o'clock |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Some of my really good friends are gay and none of that applies  "
Nor to my gay and bi friends and family. One had more difficulty getting her parents to accept her becoming a nun than when she told them she was a lesbian.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not sure whether to post this here or in one of the other threads, but as its a general discussion and people posting their views/opinions across. I thought I'd post it here instead.
Anyway my question are:
To all those people who aren't completely straight. In terms of your relationships with your family. What is your relationship like with them now as well as when you were growing up?
Also before you discovered and made up your mind of what you were. How were you treated as a child, into your teens and even young adulthood?
Also in your opinion. Is your sexuality all down to sexual urges/intimate emotions or is it all about love, etc? "
You think being gay is a result of a traumatic childhood?!
I have to disagree. I am very bi and have known and accepted that from quite a young age. I have fantastic parents who I get on well with and accept me for who I am. I was never hit as a child. And the women I've had relationships with have been around my age. I don't kiss girls for a laugh any more than I might kiss men for a laugh if I'm in that sort of mood.
Perhaps consider your own values and prejudices before you start generalising. |
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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago
near kings lynn |
My family know about my sexuality. I am an open person and don't lie easily. I am also very close to my mum.
When I told her she was fine about it. When it came to it I was an adult and big enough and ugly enough to make my own choices.
She would not have chosen this lifestyle for me but it's my choice.
She knows my reasons for not being in a relationship. She has seen the after effects and the hurt. She ultimately wants me to be happy.
I don't think my childhood effected my lifestyle choices and sexuality at all lol.
My marriage has a lot to do with about who I am now though x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had relations with girls from many nations
I've made passes at women of all classes
And just because you're gay I won't turn you away
If you stick around I'm sure that we can find some common ground
Sexuality - Don't threaten me with misery
Sexuality - I demand equality
Sexuality - Strong and warm and wild and free
Sexuality - Your laws do not apply to me
Sexuality - Come eat and drink and sleep with me
Sexuality - We can be what we want to be
"
Ahh, Mr Bragg. Very nice. |
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"Basically I have noticed from the people I have seen that gays have had or do the following.
1. They seriously don't get on with one particular parent (father normally) or they just may be absent a lot.
2. They were bullied and beaten a lot as a child.
3. When they announce who their partner is they are normally a lot older or a lot younger.
4. It may sound hypocritical. Unless its a feminist thing, but I believe that if a guy does anything sexually to another guy. Even a kiss or is wanting this from a guy. Them they are guy. I say its hypocritical as I think women kissing isn't gay. More of having a laugh, but obviously anything more and I would think of them as gay.
Crazed, I've seen you post some and things but this really takes the prize.
How big is your data set? How many gay people have you spoken to in depth about their relationship with their parents, their childhood and the age of their partner, if they have one? Are your observations the same for gay men and gay women?
This may be based on your observations but I don't think you can generalise like this and I'm not sure what you're trying to say in doing so..
As for men being gay if they want to do anything sexual with another man, where does bi and bi-curious fit into that? What if they try it once and decide it's not for them?
I don't think a lot of gay people would agree with you, or thank you, for suggesting they were abused children with dysfunctional families.
As for your belief that women kissing other women is "having a laugh", I'm quite honestly speechless. Oh, and again you have completely overlooked the possibility of them being bi.
Your posts kind of come across as you thinking there's something "wrong" with gay men and that something bad must have happened to them as children to make them that way."
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"Basically I have noticed from the people I have seen that gays have had or do the following.
1. They seriously don't get on with one particular parent (father normally) or they just may be absent a lot.
2. They were bullied and beaten a lot as a child.
3. When they announce who their partner is they are normally a lot older or a lot younger.
4. It may sound hypocritical. Unless its a feminist thing, but I believe that if a guy does anything sexually to another guy. Even a kiss or is wanting this from a guy. Them they are guy. I say its hypocritical as I think women kissing isn't gay. More of having a laugh, but obviously anything more and I would think of them as gay. "
Do you not think it possible that you first two observations may be symptoms and not the cause? What I mean is that at least one parent may have difficulty accepting that they have a homosexual child and this often causes problems. And children who are different to the norm are the ones who usually get bullied, so just as I got bullied due to glasses from a very early age the bullies may just be picking on the different kid who is different because they are gay. |
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