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The Fab Bad Single Male Profile Guide
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By *inaTitz OP TV/TS
over a year ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
There are about 5 improve my profile threads running at the mo. 3 of which may need FORUM INSURANCE.
So what makes a bad profile?
1 tip at a time, so we don't overload anyone. 
My tip, don't include pics of a girl playing with you, unless you can see more of you than of her. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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45 Public Photos - All of which are cock shots from the same 'flattering' angle
I also think this post may need forum insurance from the 'stop picking on single men' brigade  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are about 5 improve my profile threads running at the mo. 3 of which may need FORUM INSURANCE.
So what makes a bad profile?
1 tip at a time, so we don't overload anyone.
My tip, don't include pics of a girl playing with you, unless you can see more of you than of her. "
Totally agree why would I want to see just some guys fingers in a foo foo |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Blatant copy & paste messages:
Hey (insert name here) Wow your pictures look amazing! So when are we meeting? I'd love to fuck you. I've attached some recent (cock) pics for you. Look forward to hearing back from you! Xx |
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Let's not forget the huge long fantasy profile!
I meet you at the door and... 
Even worse when it's cut and pasted into a message that begins with "what would you say if" then you check out the profile and there it all is.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't like it when they make no mention of their feelings toward cheese.
Stinking Bishop! 
Who the fuck told you!?  "
I am a spy and I know everything. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Donut photos. Chicks dig them and you'll be fighting them off with a 24" double ender in a heartbeat!  "
Currently snapchatting a selection of Krispykremes as we speak.
(Rubs hands together and blows the dust off his double ended dong) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Donut photos. Chicks dig them and you'll be fighting them off with a 24" double ender in a heartbeat! "
Will the mini chocolate doughnuts have the same effect?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Donut photos. Chicks dig them and you'll be fighting them off with a 24" double ender in a heartbeat!
Will the mini chocolate doughnuts have the same effect?
"
Just don't let on they're mini!
*seems to work with those mini sky remotes and 'dubious' tape measures!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Donut photos. Chicks dig them and you'll be fighting them off with a 24" double ender in a heartbeat!
Will the mini chocolate doughnuts have the same effect?
Just don't let on they're mini!
*seems to work with those mini sky remotes and 'dubious' tape measures! "
Lol, don't forget the mini beer cans! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Donut photos. Chicks dig them and you'll be fighting them off with a 24" double ender in a heartbeat!
Will the mini chocolate doughnuts have the same effect?
Just don't let on they're mini!
*seems to work with those mini sky remotes and 'dubious' tape measures!
Lol, don't forget the mini beer cans!"
I'd try and hide the packaging then. There's always something in the background.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...and how comes you guys are spelling doughnuts as donuts? Is it me spelling it wrong or isn't that the American spelling?
 "
Laziness!
And as Funky would say - uses less letters and therefore saves on effort, time and internet paper! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm told I am..." (goodlooking/have a good sense of humour/am VWE/ etc bla)
You shouldn't need others to tell you what you are. It sounds immature/cocky.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...and how comes you guys are spelling doughnuts as donuts? Is it me spelling it wrong or isn't that the American spelling?
Laziness!
And as Funky would say - uses less letters and therefore saves on effort, time and internet paper! "
...think of all the trees i must have wasted lol
 |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"For straight guys a picture of you pulling your arse cheeks apart "
Urgh!
Any profile that wants an older woman to teach them. I'm not here to teach, I'm here to shag!
Also moany ranty profiles. eg 'why won't anyone meet me?', 'women on here are too fussy', and so on. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Cock pics taken over an open loo seat or in a bedroom that looks like a bomb has gone off in the wardrobe and scattered the contents over the floor, no, no, no!!! |
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By *ilyflo1Woman
over a year ago
Horsham |
"For straight guys a picture of you pulling your arse cheeks apart
Urgh!
Any profile that wants an older woman to teach them. I'm not here to teach, I'm here to shag!
Also moany ranty profiles. eg 'why won't anyone meet me?', 'women on here are too fussy', and so on."
Totally agree. We're definitely on the same page |
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I like to see the pics of the person or people who's profile it is, not who they are shagging as well. I also don't like to see lists of things that they are not into, I'd rather hear what they are into. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Donut photos. Chicks dig them and you'll be fighting them off with a 24" double ender in a heartbeat! "
All your photos are excellent and well thought through xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Cock pics taken over an open loo seat or in a bedroom that looks like a bomb has gone off in the wardrobe and scattered the contents over the floor, no, no, no!!!"
Agree with that lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are about 5 improve my profile threads running at the mo. 3 of which may need FORUM INSURANCE.
So what makes a bad profile?
1 tip at a time, so we don't overload anyone.
My tip, don't include pics of a girl playing with you, unless you can see more of you than of her. "
I don't like seeing these either. Also no safe sex indicated in interests, why wouldn't you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not necessarily the profile content but those nauseating thread posts to ladies/couples who've been let down:
"babe no way would I have done that to a beauty like you"
"yeah those people give us decent guys a bad name" etc.....Bleurgh |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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All guys should upload pics of their tongue sticking out, its unbelievably sexy . just seeing a pic of a fat tongue covering beautiful silver filled teeth underneath gets women's juices flowing. From that pic you can tell instantly that they have a masters in oral |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oh and white guys, if you have a pretty face but a small dick then don't worry. Upload your face pic as an avatar and then nick a black guys 10 inch cock pics. Noone will actually notice and if they do just say the lighting wasn't very good |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hide cock pics only show if they ask for them
I dont mind one or two, but well done, and only as well as other photos x "
I have two cocks...one is my nose and it does dribble gooey stuff at times |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Let's not forget the huge long fantasy profile!
I meet you at the door and...
Even worse when it's cut and pasted into a message that begins with "what would you say if" then you check out the profile and there it all is. "
Or the cut and paste of a load of symbols in the shape of a woman's body...I don't understand the point of it at all! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Kids toys in the background and the phrase "all meets at ours after nine pm as we need to put the kids to bed". WRONG!
Photos taken in bedrooms that need to be visited by Aggie from that cleaning programme on the telly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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1. Don't mention the word "timewaster"
2. If your cheating, say so.
3. If you can't accommmodate, say why (a good, valid reason not your job or neighbours, etc, see forums for lame Reasons to avoid)
4. Sexy clothing/style pics - suits, tees, shirts, jeans, etc, are as hot and balanced as cock pics
5. As others have said, no other sex/woman pics where you are not the majority of the pic (personally I can do without them as don't see any relevance)
6. Have preferences and opinions shared on your profile, wanting anything with anyone, any age/size is just desperate
Etc xx
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hide cock pics only show if they ask for them
I dont mind one or two, but well done, and only as well as other photos x
I have two cocks...one is my nose and it does dribble gooey stuff at times"
Erm, nose play isn't a fetish I've come across before! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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""I'm told I am..." (goodlooking/have a good sense of humour/am VWE/ etc bla)
You shouldn't need others to tell you what you are. It sounds immature/cocky.
Aaargh, HATE that!!!"
Me too! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Let's not forget the huge long fantasy profile!
I meet you at the door and...
Even worse when it's cut and pasted into a message that begins with "what would you say if" then you check out the profile and there it all is.
Or the cut and paste of a load of symbols in the shape of a woman's
body...I don't understand the point of it at all! "
Oo Id forgotten about those, I must admit I haven't seen one in a while, ah nostalgia |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Let's not forget the huge long fantasy profile!
I meet you at the door and...
Even worse when it's cut and pasted into a message that begins with "what would you say if" then you check out the profile and there it all is. "
This!! 
Had the old copy and paste profile in a message today then was asked. " can you give me a few pointers?" |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Let's not forget the huge long fantasy profile!
I meet you at the door and...
Even worse when it's cut and pasted into a message that begins with "what would you say if" then you check out the profile and there it all is.
Or the cut and paste of a load of symbols in the shape of a woman's
body...I don't understand the point of it at all!
Oo Id forgotten about those, I must admit I haven't seen one in a while, ah nostalgia "
They are still around.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Cock pics taken over an open loo seat or in a bedroom that looks like a bomb has gone off in the wardrobe and scattered the contents over the floor, no, no, no!!!
Agree with that lol "
So glad I'm not the only grossed out but the cock pic while sitting on the toilet! I can't even take them seriously! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Photos with you're socks still on!!!!
...but my socks are lovely!
Popeye!! We have talked about this!  "
...that's it. Your on my Jehova's Socks List. Are you ready for your conversion? You may need to step down that ladder, undo those shackles and see how my socks are an aphrodisiac.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...and how comes you guys are spelling doughnuts as donuts? Is it me spelling it wrong or isn't that the American spelling?
"
Donut, doughnut what's the difference? They are all beignets to me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I might need to shorten mine. It's like i'm doing a dissertation again
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Nowhere near my current updated one! That's right folks.. after months away abroad I made it back!
(awe nobody will cares about me)
Hahaha
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
This thread is hilarious - I really enjoyed reading it and would agree to many posts.
I would simply suggest a medium sized genuine profile (definitely not a one liner nor War and Peace) and a couple of enticing shots (that leave a little to the imagination). |
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