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The Elusive G Spot

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

A couple of Months ago i was chatting to a Bloke in the Pub about the mythical G spot and after a long discussion and Pints of Vodka i managed to persuade him to Sell me a map that had been in his Family for Generations.

Anyway after he had driven off in his pickup Truck back to the Caravan site i had a good look at said Map and noticed a small x in a hidden crevice tucked away in the Gynolayers.

Now i think this is going to be a Perilous journey into the Hot and Humid Depths of largely undiscovered Territory so i have decided that in the new Year i am going to seek Sponsorship to get a willing Team of intrepid Explorers Together in this Quest that can only Benefit mankind.

Protective Gear will be Supplied but the explorers will need to Supply their own Basic Equipment such as Sturdy and Robust Crevice Tools.

Also i will be looking for Volunteers for Practice and Acclimatization.

Please address your Application Complete with CV to The Cracked Actor Home for Retired Nutjobs..FAO Napoleon Boneyparts the IV.

Lets be Carefull out there

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Good luck with that . Sounds like a dangerous and hazardous journey ahead of you . Many men have tried and failed and some have never been seen again ..Br careful mate its a jungle out there . May god be with you x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol "

You do realise that you will have to Sleep with one eye open for the rest of ya Life now dont'cha

Mind you i'm open to Bribes

Gary

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol "

oi no planks of wood.here lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Sits in the cowards corner . And stays silent

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Sits in the cowards corner . And stays silent "
you sit with me saucepot, they are picking on me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I will do love . A plank indeed !!! Tut

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Why am I thinking about railway sleepers ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Sits in the cowards corner . And stays silent you sit with me saucepot, they are picking on me "

Ere i was Defending your Honour i was

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Sits in the cowards corner . And stays silent you sit with me saucepot, they are picking on me

Ere i was Defending your Honour i was "

come and sit with me mate .Us cowards should stick together

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

you mentioned a plank, no one else did lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Sits in the cowards corner . And stays silent you sit with me saucepot, they are picking on me

Ere i was Defending your Honour i was come and sit with me mate .Us cowards should stick together "

you can run but you can't hide, I coughed up the watch, sold it to the gypsies got me white lightening what a touch

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Sits in the cowards corner . And stays silent you sit with me saucepot, they are picking on me

Ere i was Defending your Honour i was come and sit with me mate .Us cowards should stick together "

I think im gonna Start a Woe is me Thread n Try n get a Sympathy Shag

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Sits in the cowards corner . And stays silent you sit with me saucepot, they are picking on me

Ere i was Defending your Honour i was come and sit with me mate .Us cowards should stick together

I think im gonna Start a Woe is me Thread n Try n get a Sympathy Shag "

Well I'm feeling sorry for you already if that helps

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Actually laughed out loud reading the opening post!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol "

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers? "

a little from column a, and a little from column b.

we have this little understanding.

3 chickens and a stapler.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers? "

haha I offered a plank of wood to no avail and I found the gold watch..I'm d*unk now...nette

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers?

a little from column a, and a little from column b.

we have this little understanding.

3 chickens and a stapler. "

We don't needvto know what you found looking for the g spot

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers? haha I offered a plank of wood to no avail and I found the gold watch..I'm d*unk now...nette "

Your gonna be overun with boxes of milk Tray n Bunches of Flowers now

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers? haha I offered a plank of wood to no avail and I found the gold watch..I'm d*unk now...nette

Your gonna be overun with boxes of milk Tray n Bunches of Flowers now "

I know knights in shining armour to me rescue

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers? haha I offered a plank of wood to no avail and I found the gold watch..I'm d*unk now...nette

Your gonna be overun with boxes of milk Tray n Bunches of Flowers now I know knights in shining armour to me rescue "

Lets hope they have Stout Lances

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Gary is now offering classes in . Sexual suicide . Please apply in writing xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Gary is now offering classes in . Sexual suicide . Please apply in writing xx"
lol all the blokes have seen his posts I'm in for chocolates now

Nette

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

i'm a Typical Bloke, offer everything n Deliver little....and Lie alot

Gary

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers?

a little from column a, and a little from column b.

we have this little understanding.

3 chickens and a stapler.

We don't need to know what you found looking for the g spot "

and you say I need to be brave lol.

that was the dowry offered to gary for nette's services lol

i want to know where this gold watch was found.

i mustve missed that...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers?

a little from column a, and a little from column b.

we have this little understanding.

3 chickens and a stapler.

We don't need to know what you found looking for the g spot

and you say I need to be brave lol.

that was the dowry offered to gary for nette's services lol

i want to know where this gold watch was found.

i mustve missed that... "

I have a confession. When dave was looking for mine he found a frigging hot tub complete with pervy frog and rubber duck. Who said foos are useless.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers?

a little from column a, and a little from column b.

we have this little understanding.

3 chickens and a stapler.

We don't need to know what you found looking for the g spot

and you say I need to be brave lol.

that was the dowry offered to gary for nette's services lol

i want to know where this gold watch was found.

i mustve missed that...

I have a confession. When dave was looking for mine he found a frigging hot tub complete with pervy frog and rubber duck. Who said foos are useless. "

Can i have my Duck back Please

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers?

a little from column a, and a little from column b.

we have this little understanding.

3 chickens and a stapler.

We don't need to know what you found looking for the g spot

and you say I need to be brave lol.

that was the dowry offered to gary for nette's services lol

i want to know where this gold watch was found.

i mustve missed that...

I have a confession. When dave was looking for mine he found a frigging hot tub complete with pervy frog and rubber duck. Who said foos are useless. "

told ya I coughed it up sold it to the gypsies got a proper deal "white lightening" nette

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers?

a little from column a, and a little from column b.

we have this little understanding.

3 chickens and a stapler.

We don't need to know what you found looking for the g spot

and you say I need to be brave lol.

that was the dowry offered to gary for nette's services lol

i want to know where this gold watch was found.

i mustve missed that...

I have a confession. When dave was looking for mine he found a frigging hot tub complete with pervy frog and rubber duck. Who said foos are useless.

Can i have my Duck back Please "

ca i have my hot tub back, then?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

are we talking about the new ford elusive g spot

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I just usually just fumble about and wait for the ooooooo

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers?

a little from column a, and a little from column b.

we have this little understanding.

3 chickens and a stapler.

We don't need to know what you found looking for the g spot

and you say I need to be brave lol.

that was the dowry offered to gary for nette's services lol

i want to know where this gold watch was found.

i mustve missed that...

I have a confession. When dave was looking for mine he found a frigging hot tub complete with pervy frog and rubber duck. Who said foos are useless.

Can i have my Duck back Please "

finders keepers losers weepers xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers?

a little from column a, and a little from column b.

we have this little understanding.

3 chickens and a stapler.

We don't need to know what you found looking for the g spot

and you say I need to be brave lol.

that was the dowry offered to gary for nette's services lol

i want to know where this gold watch was found.

i mustve missed that...

I have a confession. When dave was looking for mine he found a frigging hot tub complete with pervy frog and rubber duck. Who said foos are useless.

Can i have my Duck back Please

ca i have my hot tub back, then? "

its in our back gatden all set up sorry

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I just usually just fumble about and wait for the ooooooo "

you do it in a cinema?

is that the audience giving your efforts their disapproval? lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I just usually just fumble about and wait for the ooooooo "

hey up that's my method however its turns in ooooooouch are you trying to start a fire down there

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"i will happily help you search for netties.

i have my gps, so we can find our way back, and i will tie my leg to the bed post so i dont fall in too far.

lol

o boy, you are either very brave or very daft cos netty is gonna kill ya. Where do we send the flowers?

a little from column a, and a little from column b.

we have this little understanding.

3 chickens and a stapler.

We don't need to know what you found looking for the g spot

and you say I need to be brave lol.

that was the dowry offered to gary for nette's services lol

i want to know where this gold watch was found.

i mustve missed that...

I have a confession. When dave was looking for mine he found a frigging hot tub complete with pervy frog and rubber duck. Who said foos are useless.

Can i have my Duck back Please

ca i have my hot tub back, then?

its in our back gatden all set up sorry"

well thats not fair.

thats in, im getting in the car, coming to yours and having a go in it.

.

.

.

.

and then im going in the hot tub lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Feel free. Might find some treasure too

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

To dark in a cinema . Cant see my my " Begginers course on G spot location " Manuals xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I have recently been told it is easy to find as it feels different...knobbly would you believe? Is that true or was making it up?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have recently been told it is easy to find as it feels different...knobbly would you believe? Is that true or was making it up?"

thanks for the tip

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have recently been told it is easy to find as it feels different...knobbly would you believe? Is that true or was making it up?"
And you think I would know ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have recently been told it is easy to find as it feels different...knobbly would you believe? Is that true or was making it up?"

you clit is, not the g spot.

the spot is just where all the nerves end inside the wall of your puss.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have recently been told it is easy to find as it feels different...knobbly would you believe? Is that true or was making it up? And you think I would know ? "

someone must know

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Feel free. Might find some treasure too "

your foo would be the treasure

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

joking aside, havent haynes done a manual on this? lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Im stilL looking for A.B.C.D.E.F

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have recently been told it is easy to find as it feels different...knobbly would you believe? Is that true or was making it up?

you clit is, not the g spot.

the spot is just where all the nerves end inside the wall of your puss."

I knew that

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have recently been told it is easy to find as it feels different...knobbly would you believe? Is that true or was making it up?

you clit is, not the g spot.

the spot is just where all the nerves end inside the wall of your puss."

I know where and what my clit is. No one ever claimed to be able to feel my G spot before and I am curious to know if he was bullshitting

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"joking aside, havent haynes done a manual on this? lol"

the have the ford clitoris (focus) as every c*** as one

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have recently been told it is easy to find as it feels different...knobbly would you believe? Is that true or was making it up?

you clit is, not the g spot.

the spot is just where all the nerves end inside the wall of your puss.

I know where and what my clit is. No one ever claimed to be able to feel my G spot before and I am curious to know if he was bullshitting"

i guessed you would know your clit. lol.

have never felt anything knobbly whilst playing.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I once found a Toy from a Happy Meal

Do i get a Prize

Gary

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Right. Never. I thought it was a bit odd. Probably found my urethra...lol one way of getting me wet!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I once found a Toy from a Happy Meal

Do i get a Prize

Gary"

Was it still in the happy meal box ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I just usually just fumble about and wait for the ooooooo "

Ooh feel free to fumble here till you get an Oooooo

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By *inaTitzTV/TS  over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I bet there is an app that helps you find it. Preferably with Brian Blessed (and why is he not a Sir?) doing the voice for it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Feel free. Might find some treasure too

your foo would be the treasure "

aww shucks

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I just usually just fumble about and wait for the ooooooo

Ooh feel free to fumble here till you get an Oooooo "

Things that make you go ooooo

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I bet there is an app that helps you find it. Preferably with Brian Blessed (and why is he not a Sir?) doing the voice for it. "

That would be truly terrifying" Sir Brian yelling ' Get on with it man' might put some off their stroke

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"joking aside, havent haynes done a manual on this? lol

the have the ford clitoris (focus) as every c*** as one "

I got one of them so does that make me a c***

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Free sat navs available

Nette

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I just usually just fumble about and wait for the ooooooo

Ooh feel free to fumble here till you get an Oooooo Things that make you go ooooo "

Grrrrr !! thanks gunna be singing that all day now !!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Free sat navs available

Nette "

I had a sat nav . I had a Turkish guys voice on it . No matter where I put . I ended up at his brother's carpet shop in Mamaris

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"joking aside, havent haynes done a manual on this? lol

the have the ford clitoris (focus) as every c*** as one

I got one of them so does that make me a c*** "

i have had one as well so i must have been one

its a saying

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I just usually just fumble about and wait for the ooooooo

Ooh feel free to fumble here till you get an Oooooo Things that make you go ooooo

Grrrrr !! thanks gunna be singing that all day now !!!!! "

Think of me while your singing it

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Free sat navs available

Nette I had a sat nav . I had a Turkish guys voice on it . No matter where I put . I ended up at his brother's carpet shop in Mamaris "

I got one on the market a pound..weeee I'm sitting on the moon nette

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Free sat navs available

Nette I had a sat nav . I had a Turkish guys voice on it . No matter where I put . I ended up at his brother's carpet shop in Mamaris "

i had one with maggie thatchers voice on it.

no matter where i went, it just wouldnt turn....

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Free sat navs available

Nette I had a sat nav . I had a Turkish guys voice on it . No matter where I put . I ended up at his brother's carpet shop in Mamaris

i had one with maggie thatchers voice on it.

no matter where i went, it just wouldnt turn...."

I need a ray Winston one..my god I will be on the moon..nette

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Free sat navs available

Nette I had a sat nav . I had a Turkish guys voice on it . No matter where I put . I ended up at his brother's carpet shop in Mamaris

i had one with maggie thatchers voice on it.

no matter where i went, it just wouldnt turn...."

Had one with my xwifes voice on it . Took me to the cleaners .. bum bum

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Free sat navs available

Nette I had a sat nav . I had a Turkish guys voice on it . No matter where I put . I ended up at his brother's carpet shop in Mamaris

i had one with maggie thatchers voice on it.

no matter where i went, it just wouldnt turn.... Had one with my xwifes voice on it . Took me to the cleaners .. bum bum "

didnt realise you liked it like that lol

my current one has call me daves voice on.

always u turning

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I just usually just fumble about and wait for the ooooooo

Ooh feel free to fumble here till you get an Oooooo Things that make you go ooooo

Grrrrr !! thanks gunna be singing that all day now !!!!! Think of me while your singing it "

Oh don't worry I will !!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I just usually just fumble about and wait for the ooooooo

Ooh feel free to fumble here till you get an Oooooo Things that make you go ooooo

Grrrrr !! thanks gunna be singing that all day now !!!!! Think of me while your singing it

Oh don't worry I will !!!! "

lol minx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

You might not believe me, but I've actually been there, honest guv, I have.

Ok, it was back in the midst of time when Gods dog was a puppy.

I keep getting flashbacks and sometimes still wake up all warm and sticky.

I hope the quest for the Holy Growler gets underway, but be brave, be lucky and you may find it

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