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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Does anybody ever go through the stage of questioning what they are doing and why...??? Sometimes, despite enjoying sex, I feel like swinging can be bad for the soul. I seem to be finding it harder to make an emotional connection with anybody and I prob crave this more than anything. I do think I've come addicted to sex and this site but know it's not normal to me... I miss intimacy and wondering if this is effecting my ability to " connect" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anybody ever go through the stage of questioning what they are doing and why...??? Sometimes, despite enjoying sex, I feel like swinging can be bad for the soul. I seem to be finding it harder to make an emotional connection with anybody and I prob crave this more than anything. I do think I've come addicted to sex and this site but know it's not normal to me... I miss intimacy and wondering if this is effecting my ability to " connect" "
You are definitely NOT alone in this. Every so often I take a break as I am very sensitive but as a single woman I also do the vanilla dating thing too but I keep both separate....or to begin with anyway.....in the vain hope that I might meet someone with I can combine both! A rarity but you never know.....its about trying to keep a sense of perspective but as soon as you feel it affecting you negatively. .take a break xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ah thankyou... I guess I'm more conscious of it this time of year. I wondered if I was alone in this. What about guys out there??? Do you feel it effects your ability to get emotionally close? X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yep, sounds familiar.
Then again, some would argue that as a single person I can't swing.
I know what you mean though."
Why would they say that????
Oh you mean the traditional origins of keys in the bowl at a party where each person got to home with someone elses husband or wife??? Ah well....things have moved on! Not sure if I would describe myself as a swinger then . Let's just say I am a hedonist with a heart!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have a feeling that for lots of blokes its just a shag I'm afraid. Most will want to leave pretty quickly once they've got their end away enough times. Besides a lot on here seem to be married and playing away without permission so they get the emotional side from home.
I do like some sort of emotional connection myself even if it is to be more friends then lovers. I don't think here is a good place to find somebody to have a proper relationship with. I would worry that they have too much of a sexual appetite to be happy with one person.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have a feeling that for lots of blokes its just a shag I'm afraid. Most will want to leave pretty quickly once they've got their end away enough times. Besides a lot on here seem to be married and playing away without permission so they get the emotional side from home.
I do like some sort of emotional connection myself even if it is to be more friends then lovers. I don't think here is a good place to find somebody to have a proper relationship with. I would worry that they have too much of a sexual appetite to be happy with one person.
"
I get what you mean...though personally speaking my energies go more into relationships than swinging. ..well...a lot more. This is just fun as a single woman. That said.....it is important to me that any relationship I have is with someone who is sexually liberated with an open mind. ....I would be happy with just one. ..but the RIGHT one. I certainly don't look for him on HERE so I am constantly surprised to hear so many that do!!
Bottom line...as a single. ...you never know what life will throw it where it will come from! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I know what you mean OP.
I have similar thoughts at times, not about wanting intimacy, as im not looking for that in swinging, but I do question whether we should be indulging in sex with strangers and whether its all a bit dirty and vulgar and shameful.
But I do have this sense of adventure and I can't always live by the good and proper rules that society seemingly set, its my vice. I do look on swinging as taboo, that its wrong somehow, but the pull for me is exactly that, I get a kick out of doing this wrong thing  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'm not looking for intanacy through swinging...but this is exactly my point because I do this as a regular thing, when I vanilla date I'm starting to lose the ability to build up any form of connection to develop a level of intimacy. Or maybe I've just become so buggered up! Hence why I need a word with myself!!!!!!!! Prob is I'm too hooked to stop lol |
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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago
near kings lynn |
I agree with the majority of posts. I would love to meet that special someone. But don't go anywhere vanilla to meet people really. I onlyhave one wweekend a month off so try get out to a house party or vlub during that time.
I miss intimacy massively but can't risk my heart being hurt again and my kids. I don't give my heart easily and each time been let down badly. So this site works for me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anybody ever go through the stage of questioning what they are doing and why...??? Sometimes, despite enjoying sex, I feel like swinging can be bad for the soul. I seem to be finding it harder to make an emotional connection with anybody and I prob crave this more than anything. I do think I've come addicted to sex and this site but know it's not normal to me... I miss intimacy and wondering if this is effecting my ability to " connect" "
There is an article in yesterday's Daily Mirror about the differences between men and women's attitudes to casual sex and the emotional connection. You may be able to get it on line. It's an interesting read |
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By *adyA01Woman
over a year ago
Wellington |
"I'm not looking for intanacy through swinging...but this is exactly my point because I do this as a regular thing, when I vanilla date I'm starting to lose the ability to build up any form of connection to develop a level of intimacy. Or maybe I've just become so buggered up! Hence why I need a word with myself!!!!!!!! Prob is I'm too hooked to stop lol "
You are most definitely not alone, my profile is hidden and haven't met anyone from here in ages, I enjoy the forums which is why I come on here! I think what nost guys fail to realise is that many of the women on here would give this up in a heartbeat for a genuine relationship! I have recently had a couple of fellas in the vanilla world show interest in me, unfortunately I think I am looking at them with my fab head on and assume all they want is sex, so I have not followed through with either. To be fair they are not my type either, but I do feel I need to readjust my mindset if I am going to be successful in building a normal relationship! I have had a lot of fun in the past, but sometimes I wish I had never explored this far! Hindsight is a wonderful thing xxxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I miss that intimacy and emotion with someone special, it's been a long time and it is that time of year but although I have improved my confidence on here I am further away from a real relationship, I no longer want one. |
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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago
near kings lynn |
I wouldn't want to give up fab as love the lifestyle. Even if I found the man of my dream (which is very unlikely) and he gives me everything I sedire he still isn't going to be able to give me the pleasure of being with a woman. So couldn't go vanilla x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yep, sounds familiar.
Then again, some would argue that as a single person I can't swing.
I know what you mean though."
I'm kind of starting to agree with that. Single people can have fun.... but without someone to share it with it can feel very empty.
I don't meet on my own anymore because of this. x |
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