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The rules men live by

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By *thyorks OP   Couple  over a year ago

ROTHERHAM

The Man Rules

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

Finally, the guys' side of the story.

(must admit, it's pretty good..)

We always hear "the rules"

From the female side..

Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules!

Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "

ON PURPOSE!

1.Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.

We need it up, you need it down.

You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.

Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.

Let us be clear on this one:

Subtle hints do not work!

Strong hints do not work!

Obvious hints do not work!

Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.

Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

1.. If you think you're fat, you probably are.

Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done.

Not both.

If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials. ...

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings.

Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.

We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.

We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as FOOTBALL or

motor sports

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Excelent m8, already sent to about 3 people!!!

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By *zMaleMan  over a year ago

penzance

So Funny good 1

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By *ebzStarWoman  over a year ago

Notting

Hmmmmm.

I notice only the men find this even remotely funny!!!

Bet then us women have to let them entertain themselves sometimes, esp when we cant be arsed

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By *zMaleMan  over a year ago

penzance

I got some extra strong paracetamol her for you hun

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I got some extra strong paracetamol her for you hun "

Sod that crack out the Rohypnol!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hmmmmm.

I notice only the men find this even remotely funny!!!

Bet then us women have to let them entertain themselves sometimes, esp when we cant be arsed"

Yes I noticed that too: bless em let's not spoil their fun.

A friend sent this to me a year ago: he thought it was hilarious too!

Right, let's leave the boys to their bonding session and find the shoes thread...

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By *emmefataleWoman  over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

well i think its spot on and very true, so come on girls leave the toilet seats up for the boys eh ?????

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By *ebzStarWoman  over a year ago

Notting


"Hmmmmm.

I notice only the men find this even remotely funny!!!

Bet then us women have to let them entertain themselves sometimes, esp when we cant be arsed

Yes I noticed that too: bless em let's not spoil their fun.

A friend sent this to me a year ago: he thought it was hilarious too!

Right, let's leave the boys to their bonding session and find the shoes thread... "

LOL

i didnt wanna admit that i had that by email years ago too, pmsl.

Now where were we,...SHOES

Oh - and i am immune to Rohypnol. But buy me a bottle of scotch and i am all yours

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Oh - and i am immune to Rohypnol. But buy me a bottle of scotch and i am all yours"

Done! ... but no kissing if you're on that, lol

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By *ebzStarWoman  over a year ago

Notting


"Oh - and i am immune to Rohypnol. But buy me a bottle of scotch and i am all yours

Done! ... but no kissing if you're on that, lol"

Deal

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By *zMaleMan  over a year ago

penzance


"Oh - and i am immune to Rohypnol. But buy me a bottle of scotch and i am all yours

Done! ... but no kissing if you're on that, lol

Deal "

Make sure it's asingle malt tho LOL

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman  over a year ago

little house on the praire

*yawn* see the guys are amusing themselves again

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I liked the one number 1.

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