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If you could see them through my eyes
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
How we view people, what we find attractive and consider as beautiful is so individual why do we assume others see the same as us?
I love hearing partners talk about the beauty of the other, including posts on here, and the pride and joy in their tone. When they want me to agree with them I find the right words but sometimes my inner mean head is pulling a face as I can't see it physically or personality wise.
What do you do?
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"We all see different things in people, attractiveness, personality. We can't expect others to see the same things. Well I don't anyway
"
I don't but I have met people who do think their view is the only view.
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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
Other views are always available. Unless of course we are discussing the sainted Milena Velba, of course.
It wouldn't do for us all to have the same views, I guess the trick is to smile  |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Other views are always available. Unless of course we are discussing the sainted Milena Velba, of course.
It wouldn't do for us all to have the same views, I guess the trick is to smile "
I don't know who Milena Velba is.
I usually do smile, it is when I have someone telling me how marvellous their partner is and looking for a validation from me that I find it difficult.
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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
"
I usually do smile, it is when I have someone telling me how marvellous their partner is and looking for a validation from me that I find it difficult.
"
Smile and wave as the Penguins in Madagascar say and hope that is enough to get you by  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This is a good question that I am not sure I can answer to be honest!
As others have said, we all see things differently, what appeals to one may not appeal to another! |
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"Other views are always available. Unless of course we are discussing the sainted Milena Velba, of course.
It wouldn't do for us all to have the same views, I guess the trick is to smile
I don't know who Milena Velba is.
I usually do smile, it is when I have someone telling me how marvellous their partner is and looking for a validation from me that I find it difficult.
"
I usually smile and nod enthusiastically while like you feeling slightly awkward inside. One can hardly say something like "Ooo, should've gone to Specsavers" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Other views are always available. Unless of course we are discussing the sainted Milena Velba, of course.
It wouldn't do for us all to have the same views, I guess the trick is to smile
I don't know who Milena Velba is.
I usually do smile, it is when I have someone telling me how marvellous their partner is and looking for a validation from me that I find it difficult.
"
It just gets my back up to be honest. I feel like saying something the complete opposite to what they want to hear. I try to avoid saying anything, as I do however feel sorry for them. I think it's sad that people are that insecure that they need constant approval (for want of a better word) from others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Other views are always available. Unless of course we are discussing the sainted Milena Velba, of course.
It wouldn't do for us all to have the same views, I guess the trick is to smile
I don't know who Milena Velba is.
I usually do smile, it is when I have someone telling me how marvellous their partner is and looking for a validation from me that I find it difficult.
"
I ran into this on a meet with a couple and I found it very awkward  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How we view people, what we find attractive and consider as beautiful is so individual why do we assume others see the same as us?
I love hearing partners talk about the beauty of the other, including posts on here, and the pride and joy in their tone. When they want me to agree with them I find the right words but sometimes my inner mean head is pulling a face as I can't see it physically or personality wise.
What do you do?
"
Is it really 'so individual'? If so why do do many people consider the same people as physically beautiful? |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Other views are always available. Unless of course we are discussing the sainted Milena Velba, of course.
It wouldn't do for us all to have the same views, I guess the trick is to smile
I don't know who Milena Velba is.
I usually do smile, it is when I have someone telling me how marvellous their partner is and looking for a validation from me that I find it difficult.
I usually smile and nod enthusiastically while like you feeling slightly awkward inside. One can hardly say something like "Ooo, should've gone to Specsavers""
I haven't got to that point and usually say something like "you two are perfect together" and leave it at that. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"How we view people, what we find attractive and consider as beautiful is so individual why do we assume others see the same as us?
I love hearing partners talk about the beauty of the other, including posts on here, and the pride and joy in their tone. When they want me to agree with them I find the right words but sometimes my inner mean head is pulling a face as I can't see it physically or personality wise.
What do you do?
Is it really 'so individual'? If so why do do many people consider the same people as physically beautiful?"
Maybe not. Maybe my mean head is meaner than I thought. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Other views are always available. Unless of course we are discussing the sainted Milena Velba, of course.
It wouldn't do for us all to have the same views, I guess the trick is to smile
I don't know who Milena Velba is.
I usually do smile, it is when I have someone telling me how marvellous their partner is and looking for a validation from me that I find it difficult.
I ran into this on a meet with a couple and I found it very awkward "
I am sure many have thought it about me when they have seen me with some of the men I have met (and vice versa) but as I am not in a couple it doesn't matter.
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If I disagreed I'd normally just smile with a non committal grunt.
If I strongly disagreed I say what does my opinion matter as I'm not sleeping with the person their so in to.
Anyone who knows me well would then know not to push for an answer unless they wanted an honest one and not merely an affirmation of their choice. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"If I disagreed I'd normally just smile with a non committal grunt.
If I strongly disagreed I say what does my opinion matter as I'm not sleeping with the person their so in to.
Anyone who knows me well would then know not to push for an answer unless they wanted an honest one and not merely an affirmation of their choice. "
It is just affirmation they seek isn't it? I need to stop thinking. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How we view people, what we find attractive and consider as beautiful is so individual why do we assume others see the same as us?
I love hearing partners talk about the beauty of the other, including posts on here, and the pride and joy in their tone. When they want me to agree with them I find the right words but sometimes my inner mean head is pulling a face as I can't see it physically or personality wise.
What do you do?
Is it really 'so individual'? If so why do do many people consider the same people as physically beautiful?
Maybe not. Maybe my mean head is meaner than I thought."
Well I do wonder. I know 'love is blind' and there are qualities beyond skin deep beauty etc. but then people seem fairly consistent in who is considered attractive in the public eye. So it's difficult to see that people are not similarly consistent with others, even those they love. |
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"If I disagreed I'd normally just smile with a non committal grunt.
If I strongly disagreed I say what does my opinion matter as I'm not sleeping with the person their so in to.
Anyone who knows me well would then know not to push for an answer unless they wanted an honest one and not merely an affirmation of their choice.
It is just affirmation they seek isn't it? I need to stop thinking."
 No, keep thinking. Cogitation is good. |
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When we where at school we needed approval from our friends before we went out with someone. I can honestly say in the last 30 years or so I've never even thought about it. Its me going out with them. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"When we where at school we needed approval from our friends before we went out with someone. I can honestly say in the last 30 years or so I've never even thought about it. Its me going out with them."
Perhaps it is as simple as others not growing out of that approval stage that I find uncomfortable.
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"
I usually do smile, it is when I have someone telling me how marvellous their partner is and looking for a validation from me that I find it difficult.
"
I wonder why they need validation from anyone over who they choose to be with |
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"When we where at school we needed approval from our friends before we went out with someone. I can honestly say in the last 30 years or so I've never even thought about it. Its me going out with them.
Perhaps it is as simple as others not growing out of that approval stage that I find uncomfortable.
"
well there obviously lacking in confidence
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I usually do smile, it is when I have someone telling me how marvellous their partner is and looking for a validation from me that I find it difficult.
I wonder why they need validation from anyone over who they choose to be with "
It also could be a certain smugness, oh look at my man he big he handsome he whatever  |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"
I usually do smile, it is when I have someone telling me how marvellous their partner is and looking for a validation from me that I find it difficult.
I wonder why they need validation from anyone over who they choose to be with
It also could be a certain smugness, oh look at my man he big he handsome he whatever "
That's an interesting point. Maybe my mean head is picking up on the smug value and sending me mean thoughts. |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"
I usually do smile, it is when I have someone telling me how marvellous their partner is and looking for a validation from me that I find it difficult.
I wonder why they need validation from anyone over who they choose to be with
It also could be a certain smugness, oh look at my man he big he handsome he whatever "
I suppose so yes |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I usually do smile, it is when I have someone telling me how marvellous their partner is and looking for a validation from me that I find it difficult.
I wonder why they need validation from anyone over who they choose to be with
It also could be a certain smugness, oh look at my man he big he handsome he whatever
That's an interesting point. Maybe my mean head is picking up on the smug value and sending me mean thoughts."
I know that was the vibe I was getting from the female in the couple the time I came across it. Also could be a way of them marking their "territory", as that was the other feeling I got from her |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Though I may not appreciate the attraction doesn't mean it's not there, hence I just smile and say something positive and try not to have any uncharitable thoughts, though occasionally it can be challenging |
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