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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Doh" ,,,,,,,,,,,,, |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman
Lisa, Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.
I'm in no condition to drive...wait! I shouldn't listen to myself, I'm d*unk!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I thought this was the book group discussing Homer's Iliad
me too ..but what do we know eh ??
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mind u my favourite has to be
Marge I swear, I never thought that you would find out. could be the mantra for this site ...... |
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Tom: C'mon Bart, you know better than to talk to strangers.
Homer: For your information, I'm his father.
Tom: His father...? The d*unken GAMBLER!?
Homer: That's right! And who might you be?
*Tom punches Homer in the face, and the two wind up kicking the shit out of each other all over town. Homer loses. Just.*.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Lisa invents a perpetual motion machine..
'Lisa! Get in here.In this house, we obey the laws of thermodynamics!'
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'Every time I learn something new it pushes some old stuff out of my brain' |
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Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You/re making a scene'.
I don't hate your mother, I just won't be sad when she dies.
Marge, you being a cop makes you the man - which makes me the woman; and I have no interest in that, besides occasionally wearing the underwear, which (as we discussed) is strictly a comfort thing. |
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Beer - now THERE'S a temporary solution.
Well, let's just call them, uh, Mr. X and Mrs. Y. So anyway, Mr. X would say, 'Marge, if this doesn't get your motor running, my name isn't Homer J. Simpson.'
Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie, and one to listen. |
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I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are.
All right, let's not panic. I'll make the money by selling one of my livers. I can get by with one.
Books are useless: I only ever read one book, "To Kill A Mockingbird" - and it gave me absolutely no insight on how to kill mockingbirds! Sure it taught me not to judge a man by the color of his skin, but what good does THAT do me?
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