FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > I think it is time

I think it is time

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

For me to step away from FAB for a while, if not in defiantly before I get myself banned.

I am finding it increasingly hard to bite my tongue and not give both barrels to guys who call me rude for rejecting them, are clearly not what I am looking for and pointless messages.

Thank combined with men who ask to meet but either don't have the time or balls to do so is resulting in a non existent fuse and turning this from a bit of fun to as much hard work as dating was.

I came on here to find one or two men to see regularly for fun and failed, instead I found men who 'fell for me' and got jealous or those who just don't have time.

I will probably still post in the forums as most of you make me laugh but right now I just need time out from meeting and a big hug.

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By *emmefataleWoman over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

Why let things like that get to you? I just cannot understand it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sending a big (((HUG)))

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Why let things like that get to you? I just cannot understand it."

Because I am human

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By *oxy_minxWoman over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

"Why let things like that get to you? I just cannot understand it."

Neither do I, I'm great at just ignoring people!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

(((Hugs))))) xxxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Big cwtch (hug) I took three months out and only rejoined a week ago so I can understand your way of thinking. You have to do what you think is right for you x

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By *emmefataleWoman over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"Why let things like that get to you? I just cannot understand it.

Because I am human"
Interesting, bit of a no brainer I didn't think you weren't Der!, whilst its unacceptable for guys to be rude and obnoxious, lets face facts some people just are, its par for the course unfortunately.....taking things to heart just plays into peoples hands that wish to piss you off.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"(((Hugs))))) xxxx"

Im doing the same.... window shopping only

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By *uietlykinkymeWoman over a year ago

kinky land

Filters, hide profile & just enjoy the forum.

I know what you mean totally so hugs from me

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By *issHottieBottieWoman over a year ago

Kent

I've taken to telling them now. I figure that if no one ever points out what they are doing wrong they'll carry on then be moaning they get meets.

So if for example a 45 year old guy messages asking if I can meet tomorrow and attached 3 pics of his cock I'll reply saying exactly why I'm not going to meet him. Not in a rude way. Just blunt. It's working as well coz not one has sent me a shitty message back yet

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why let things like that get to you? I just cannot understand it.

Because I am humanInteresting, bit of a no brainer I didn't think you weren't Der!, whilst its unacceptable for guys to be rude and obnoxious, lets face facts some people just are, its par for the course unfortunately.....taking things to heart just plays into peoples hands that wish to piss you off."

yup...

I learnt that lesson recently

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By *issBehavingxxWoman over a year ago

Glasgow

"Why let things like that get to you? I just cannot understand it.

Neither do I, I'm great at just ignoring people!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Delete everything off your 'looking for' list, hide most pics and that should stop most mail. Then go looking for suitable guys.

Don't let them spoil your fun. Just do it differently.

Don't become a miserable, grumpy old bag like me! x

P.S. Hugs xxxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Why let things like that get to you? I just cannot understand it.

It's not the rude messages that are the main issue, I usually ignore them quite well.

It's the time wasters who just don't make an effort or have the time to meet and cancel that are starting to grip my shit or those I do meet, like but they like me too much and play up. Seems I just can't win.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you take a break same thing will probably happen when you come back.

Take control of your own destiny block single guys and look for what you want. I never understand why women having problems don't do this more.

Wayne

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By *emmefataleWoman over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"Why let things like that get to you? I just cannot understand it.

It's not the rude messages that are the main issue, I usually ignore them quite well.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

You have to ignore them but maybe a break is a good idea for you right now!!! Fuck if I listen to the bullshit that is said to me I'd me rocking in the corner or married ten times over...

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I've taken to telling them now. I figure that if no one ever points out what they are doing wrong they'll carry on then be moaning they get meets.

I have done that a couple of times but always worried they will report me

I'm not rude just blunt.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

I take everything that is said to me with a rather large pinch of salt...

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Now you sound like a typical single males who has been on here 4 weeks.

I know, they think they have it hard, I should let them step into my shoes lol.

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By *uietlykinkymeWoman over a year ago

kinky land

Pre silly season SOME people seem to get clingy. I had one myself this last week. Chatted seemed great. Meet arranged for this Sunday coming. Then low and behold i didn't pick up my messages because the kids and i were ill & all hell broke loose

I was a touch shocked but the block button is there for a reason.

When it becomes a chore either hide it away or take time out. I've only been back a few weeks myself.

Your sanity & real life always come first

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By *issHottieBottieWoman over a year ago

Kent

"I've taken to telling them now. I figure that if no one ever points out what they are doing wrong they'll carry on then be moaning they get meets.

I have done that a couple of times but always worried they will report me

I'm not rude just blunt."

If they do report I think admin can see the messages so as long as you aren't rude they won't do anything.

I can't get into trouble by telling the guy that he would have more luck messaging people that are looking to

Meet people his age, that I can never do short notice meets and that it clearly states In my profile not to send me cock pics in a message.

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By *issHottieBottieWoman over a year ago

Kent

"I take everything that is said to me with a rather large pinch of salt..."

Christ yes if I listened to all the snivelling messages I get telling me how gorgeous and beautiful and 'the only one that's been TOTALLY their type' I'd never get my head thru the door!! Lol xx

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By *ENDAROOSCouple over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

If it is starting to feel like hard work and getting you annoyed, a break is probably for the best.

We often take a break when things start to get under our skin or it stop becoming fun.

The other thing to do is use your filters and contact those that interest you. Saves all the messages from those that are not for you.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I have rarely gone and sought men out myself so may try it, although my judgement isn't the best.

Those who know me well know how rare it is for a man to really catch my eye enough to meet so it is disappointing when they keep cancelling (I have a 2 strike rule).

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By *ichaelangelaCouple over a year ago

notts

"If it is starting to feel like hard work and getting you annoyed, a break is probably for the best.

We often take a break when things start to get under our skin or it stop becoming fun.

The other thing to do is use your filters and contact those that interest you. Saves all the messages from those that are not for you.

^^^ this .... just put all your filters on and YOU do all the browsing and approaches to whoever you think may fit what YOU are looking for.

problem solved

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You know how to depress a guy fair play

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Delete everything off your 'looking for' list, hide most pics and that should stop most mail. Then go looking for suitable guys.

Don't let them spoil your fun. Just do it differently.

Don't become a miserable, grumpy old bag like me! x

P.S. Hugs xxxx"

Good plan steel, but the I don't agree with the last part! Grumpy old bag?? Ha

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By *yrdwomanWoman over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I have noticed myself that its getting harder to meet the type of men I want to meet. I've even had messages not replied to (the nerve!!). I have also started telling men why I won't be meeting them, generally along the lines of just how hard it will be to travel 300 miles for a meet. Half the time they tell me they didn't notice my location!

Nothing wrong with taking a break from meets. I do it often when things get too busy or annoying. Although spending more time on the forums might not be good for your sanity.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I have rarely gone and sought men out myself so may try it, although my judgement isn't the best.

Those who know me well know how rare it is for a man to really catch my eye enough to meet so it is disappointing when they keep cancelling (I have a 2 strike rule)."

Good luck with whatever you decided to do, im sure you will make the right choice for you...it's a shame.... That good people have to bow out, mainly due to the vast numpties on here!! .... X

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By *uby0000Woman over a year ago

hertfordshire

I can tell you horror stories that would put you off internet dating for life .. that's why I left before ... just don't let it get to you

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Don't know go please. Not all men are like that, pity you lie so far away from me or i give a big cuddle.

Well see you on the forums xxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fuck em let em have it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I can tell you horror stories that would put you off internet dating for life .. that's why I left before ... just don't let it get to you"

Me too, you live and learn.

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By *iss_tressWoman over a year ago

London

"Why let things like that get to you? I just cannot understand it."

This: neither can I.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

People will tell you anything to get in your draws...however there are some great people on here...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For me to step away from FAB for a while, if not in defiantly before I get myself banned.

I am finding it increasingly hard to bite my tongue and not give both barrels to guys who call me rude for rejecting them, are clearly not what I am looking for and pointless messages.

Thank combined with men who ask to meet but either don't have the time or balls to do so is resulting in a non existent fuse and turning this from a bit of fun to as much hard work as dating was.

I came on here to find one or two men to see regularly for fun and failed, instead I found men who 'fell for me' and got jealous or those who just don't have time.

I will probably still post in the forums as most of you make me laugh but right now I just need time out from meeting and a big hug.

you and me both lady.but then the anger passes and there are always more blokes to meet.xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Good luck with whatever you decided to do, im sure you will make the right choice for you...it's a shame.... That good people have to bow out, mainly due to the vast numpties on here!! .... X"

See the stubborn bitch in me doesn't want to let numpties, there have been a couple of good suggestions to alternative ways of working the site though x

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By *opsy RogersWoman over a year ago

London

"I've taken to telling them now. I figure that if no one ever points out what they are doing wrong they'll carry on then be moaning they get meets.

Oh! I started doing that today too.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"People will tell you anything to get in your draws...however there are some great people on here...

Does that mean I am clever as I am twice the normal person on here as I do both of those

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For me to step away from FAB for a while, if not in defiantly before I get myself banned.

I am finding it increasingly hard to bite my tongue and not give both barrels to guys who call me rude for rejecting them, are clearly not what I am looking for and pointless messages.

Thank combined with men who ask to meet but either don't have the time or balls to do so is resulting in a non existent fuse and turning this from a bit of fun to as much hard work as dating was.

I came on here to find one or two men to see regularly for fun and failed, instead I found men who 'fell for me' and got jealous or those who just don't have time.

I will probably still post in the forums as most of you make me laugh but right now I just need time out from meeting and a big hug.

"
no your feeling to well

as it happen 2 me for no reason given

but i plug away

hope you stay safe n what ever you do

dont let them get 2 u

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"People will tell you anything to get in your draws...however there are some great people on here...

There need to be more men like little Greedy

Shall we clone him?

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By *opsy RogersWoman over a year ago

London

"People will tell you anything to get in your draws...however there are some great people on here...

There really is.

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By *iss_tressWoman over a year ago

London

"I've taken to telling them now. I figure that if no one ever points out what they are doing wrong they'll carry on then be moaning they get meets.

I did this once and was called arrogant. I ignore and delete now: no problems!

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By *issHottieBottieWoman over a year ago

Kent

"I've taken to telling them now. I figure that if no one ever points out what they are doing wrong they'll carry on then be moaning they get meets.

I did this once and was called arrogant. I ignore and delete now: no problems!

It's bound to happen eventually, but until then I'll plod on.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Good luck with whatever you decided to do, im sure you will make the right choice for you...it's a shame.... That good people have to bow out, mainly due to the vast numpties on here!! .... X

See the stubborn bitch in me doesn't want to let numpties, there have been a couple of good suggestions to alternative ways of working the site though x"

Do your own thing. Stop meeting, arse around on the forums, chat - whatever suits your mood!

Never let anyone get to you, try and dictate what you should/shouldn't do, or worry you about the reaction you feel the need to give. As Hottie said - so long as you're not rude you can be as blunt as you like. Personally I'd just recommend deleting and blocking - less stress, instant fix and less time consuming.

There's no right or wrong way to use the site - it's a tool - nothing more. Filter out everyone and just message those you wish - don't be nervous, there's no need.

And make sure you're still around for the Feb social!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Do your own thing. Stop meeting, arse around on the forums, chat - whatever suits your mood!

There's no right or wrong way to use the site - it's a tool - nothing more. Filter out everyone and just message those you wish - don't be nervous, there's no need.

And make sure you're still around for the Feb social!!

I'm working on Feb

If not you shall have to come for a holiday by the sea

I did just reply to a guy calling me rude, I just replied with 'Yes I am' and blocked him, made me feel better lol and amused myself.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Do your own thing. Stop meeting, arse around on the forums, chat - whatever suits your mood!

There's no right or wrong way to use the site - it's a tool - nothing more. Filter out everyone and just message those you wish - don't be nervous, there's no need.

And make sure you're still around for the Feb social!!

I'm working on Feb

If not you shall have to come for a holiday by the sea

I did just reply to a guy calling me rude, I just replied with 'Yes I am' and blocked him, made me feel better lol and amused myself."

Go you!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Now you sound like a typical single males who has been on here 4 weeks.

I know, they think they have it hard, I should let them step into my shoes lol."

I think Guys have it a lot easier on here then the Ladies do, we dont get bombarded with messages, Ladies are not rude when sorry I mean if we ever turn one down for a meet, they dont send us 90 pics of there cock and expect an instant reply

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"People will tell you anything to get in your draws...however there are some great people on here...

There need to be more men like little Greedy

Shall we clone him? "

What about me. Don't I get a mention

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By *exycleanerWoman over a year ago

pontefract

hugs to you cos i feel the same , guys not rude on here as ive blocked them but they

are to me as im a basic member on another site but had cpls on here rude to me.

getting fed up with finding guys are only in this for what they want and not what you want and get arsy when you wont play along , so now dont know which way to turn

give it up and go dating or what ???

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By *inaTitzTV/TS over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I did just reply to a guy calling me rude, I just replied with 'Yes I am' and blocked him, made me feel better lol and amused myself."

You could have gone with if you think I'm rude just for saying no, then you SIMPLY wouldn't believe how rude I can be in a phonebox/taxi/bed/wheelbarrow/lift/top of a wheelie bin - too bad you'll never know!' and then block...

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By *issBehavingxxWoman over a year ago

Glasgow

"People will tell you anything to get in your draws...however there are some great people on here...

There need to be more men like little Greedy

Shall we clone him? "

Nooooooooooo!!! lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why let things like that get to you? I just cannot understand it."

doesn't sound like fun and for me it's all about fun. Time to walk away or take control.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Big cwtch (hug) I took three months out and only rejoined a week ago so I can understand your way of thinking. You have to do what you think is right for you x"

Welcome back legs xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just take a step back for a but...chances are in a couple of weeks you'll be tempted back! I usually hide over Christmas though because of limited time to meet and those that are looking for something a bit more because the time of year makes them feel lonely.

As for the dreamers...I'll allow once cancellation but cancel again and no further contact. I also don't reply to messages from those I have no interest in as I can't be arsed with the drama afterwards...plus it means next time they try they'll get a message saying I didn't reply last time. A lot ignore it, but it does seem to have stopped some

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why is this site full of women who get abuse

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By *oxy_minxWoman over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

"Why is this site full of women who get abuse

I haven't been abused for ages!!! YEAH! Must be down to me just ignoring

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just have a little break from meeting,maybe hide ur profile for a bit,so you can still use forums and chat to friends,you enjoy the banter,ur just having one them days,sleep on it for now

Don't let anyone get to u,i rarely get rudeness i would eat them alive if do,Meaning they would get a firm statement back,i dont have to be rude back,works for me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why is this site full of women who get abuse

I think it's down to filters and use of the site. People who think it's rude not to reply to messages or use the block button.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sheesh no one ever falls for me

What am I doing wrong

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sheesh no one ever falls for me

What am I doing wrong

Surely you're doing something right? Swinging isn't about falling for people?.....or have I joined a dating site by accident?!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why is this site full of women who get abuse

Most guys don't send abuse...the odd few that do though tend to stick in your head more than the ones who simply deleted a 'thanks but no thanks' email and went on their way to next profile. Makes you worry less about being seen as rude for not replying

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Sheesh no one ever falls for me

What am I doing wrong

You don't want them too hun, you really don't.

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By *phroditeWoman over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"Sheesh no one ever falls for me

What am I doing wrong

You are not doing anything wrong. Just keep looking casually and enjoy the moment. You have a lovely profile and pictures and there will be people who will appreciate you. They just have not found you yet.

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Lots of people take time away from meeting at times, they just don't advertise it and if I am honest, I am not sure why anyone would need to.

Who is your target audience? the people who you say are calling you rude / the people cancelling or the ones falling for you?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why waste time and energy on replying to them......use filters or just block men and you contact them, will avoid a lot of hassle from angry losers

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Ok please don't start abusing people when you have only one side of a story....thanks.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sheesh no one ever falls for me

What am I doing wrong

I feel exactly the same, but I can safely say if you want someone you can have them whether its for fun or more.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Ok please don't start abusing people when you have only one side of a story....thanks.

"
happens all the time

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I cannot understand why you let strangers bother you to this degree either OP. But my advice is stop meeting then, hide your profile and set filters and you won't get any messages, simple as.

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By *emmefataleWoman over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"I can tell you horror stories that would put you off internet dating for life .. that's why I left before ... just don't let it get to you"
Here isnt internet dating though. I really cannot understand why people would say such negative stuff about people they do not know just rom hearsay.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Go back to the drawing board...Ask yourself, what it is YOU want from this site?, Who it is that YOU want to meet?, Why YOU are here in the first place???.

Like a few others have said, use the filters, block people, you'll soon reach the 500 limit.

I can't see how meeting someone for a one of meet, is going to invoke feelings. If you've meet someone for a long period of time, surely they would of shown signs, it's up to you to squash or encourage them. So if you're looking for something more, maybe its YOU that needs to address, why you meet people.

If you weren't on this site, surely you wouldn't run away and hide, from things you know you can deal with?. So why do it here, woman up! and deal with anything that anyone throws at you.

I've been on this site, a long time and seen many people come and go, each and every time it turns out, there were underlying reasons in their own lives, that led to this conclusion.

We come here to have fun, if it's no longer this for you, then yes, maybe it's not the place for YOU.

All in all...do what makes you feel good about yourself, don't try and sugar-coat the real reasons for wanting to leave, as you may find when you return (which you will) that it was YOU that caused the issues in the first place.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So when are you leaving?

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By *uby0000Woman over a year ago

hertfordshire

[Removed by poster at 21/11/13 18:11:05]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So when are you leaving?"

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

"So when are you leaving?"

she didnt say she was leaving...just taking a break from meeting

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By *uby0000Woman over a year ago

hertfordshire

hide profile for a while

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sheesh no one ever falls for me

What am I doing wrong

"
. Aw Hun clearly your just not perfect enough like me!! Haha xxx

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By *oodmessMan over a year ago

yumsville

it might be a bit of a forward thinking idea. But, how about you look for and message guys you're interested in and delete all others?

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By *eeBee67Man over a year ago

Masked and Distant

Why do some guys get rude. Being rude to someone you try to chat up in a club gets you a kick in the dangliez, so why do it here?

Ive had the "not for me thanks" but would never get rude.

Illegitimi non carborundum

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By *emmefataleWoman over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"it might be a bit of a forward thinking idea. But, how about you look for and message guys you're interested in and delete all others?"
Well said Batman.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"it might be a bit of a forward thinking idea. But, how about you look for and message guys you're interested in and delete all others?Well said Batman.

Its a complicated theory ....but it just might work !

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can't see any sign that you're not meeting anymore, change of heart? Or look at me thread?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can't see any sign that you're not meeting anymore, change of heart? Or look at me thread?"

Dont think she needs a look at me thread, but I do

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just say that you're not meeting any anymore, and enjoy the love of the forum!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Now you sound like a typical single males who has been on here 4 weeks.

I know, they think they have it hard, I should let them step into my shoes lol.

My ex mother in law does....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For me to step away from FAB for a while, if not in defiantly before I get myself banned.

I am finding it increasingly hard to bite my tongue and not give both barrels to guys who call me rude for rejecting them, are clearly not what I am looking for and pointless messages.

Thank combined with men who ask to meet but either don't have the time or balls to do so is resulting in a non existent fuse and turning this from a bit of fun to as much hard work as dating was.

I came on here to find one or two men to see regularly for fun and failed, instead I found men who 'fell for me' and got jealous or those who just don't have time.

I will probably still post in the forums as most of you make me laugh but right now I just need time out from meeting and a big hug.

Just checking how that profile change its coming along....

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

[Removed by poster at 07/12/13 21:43:27]

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

You two might be better ignoring each other please.

I think this is redundant now.

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