FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Fuck buddies/ fwb's- what are your 'rules'?
Fuck buddies/ fwb's- what are your 'rules'?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'm interested to know what 'rules' people have for their fb's/ fwb's.
Do you keep it to just sex or do you go out for meals etc?
How often do you meet each other?
Do you have rules about if one of you gets feelings?
Do you just meet each other one on one or do you meet other people together as 3somes or more-somes? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm interested to know what 'rules' people have for their fb's/ fwb's.
Do you keep it to just sex or do you go out for meals etc?
How often do you meet each other?
Do you have rules about if one of you gets feelings?
Do you just meet each other one on one or do you meet other people together as 3somes or more-somes?"
I have 1-1 meets with my fb as well as 3 and 4somes with others too |
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Oh this should be interesting. I've seen so many different Fb/fwb dynamics on here and people getting possessive or one side getting more involved than the other it will be interesting to see everyone's differing opinions. |
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"Only rule I have is when they come in my front door they give me their undivided attention. When they leave its back to the real world and don't care what they do until our next meet
"
This would be how I would want it diamond. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We meet when its possible.
We go out for meals, walks and shopping together. And talk daily, usually after he gets home from the office.
We have no rules in how we feel about each other, we are best friends and that's all that matters.
And he dosnt see others, but I do  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Never had any rules regarding guys I have met regular, I treat them the same as I treat everyone I meet off here, meet shag and go, just some I will meet again some I wont |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We meet when we can.
We go out for meals and shopping and generally just spend time together.
We spend the night at each others places and I usually drop her at work the next day.
We still see others but always come back to each other. |
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By *andy_tomMan
over a year ago
wolverhampton |
A fuck buddy can be that special person in your life there has to be some sort of connection for it to work. As well as the thrill and putting that spark back in your love life. After all your both after the same thing. Love and affection as well as the sex. Ide all have needs. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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He comes over when he can, we have amazing sex, I wave good bye, then follow him, sit in my car outside his house and watch the lights and curtains moving, switch on the hidden mic, I have planted in his suit jacket, and relay any conversations to my tape recorder.
In the morning, I follow at a discreet distance, to make sure he goes into work, then I go back to his house, with a briefcase, knock on the door, and talk to his wife, about insurance or double glazing, he has 3 nice kids, and love his furniture, usually get offered a cup of tea.
Luckily I am not the needy type, but Its nice to know about his other life.
Oh and he has a hamster and white Rabbit...
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only rule I have is when they come in my front door they give me their undivided attention. When they leave its back to the real world and don't care what they do until our next meet
"
Same here  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We meet, we fuck, we leave. Occasional messages, usually initiated by him, occasional phone sex. NEVER dinner or dates or anything like that"
What if you both get hungry? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We meet, we fuck, we leave. Occasional messages, usually initiated by him, occasional phone sex. NEVER dinner or dates or anything like that
What if you both get hungry? "
Lol I'll eat when I leave |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We meet, we fuck, we leave. Occasional messages, usually initiated by him, occasional phone sex. NEVER dinner or dates or anything like that"
i've never seen a guy I meet for sex as someone I would go out for dinner or go shopping with
I think the more 'normal' things you do with a fuck buddie the more chance you have of causing complications
I think its easier to keep it for what it is sex |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We meet, we fuck, we leave. Occasional messages, usually initiated by him, occasional phone sex. NEVER dinner or dates or anything like that
What if you both get hungry?
Lol I'll eat when I leave "
I bet your FB smuggles sandwiches in his pockets and sneaks off to the toilet to eat them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We spend a lot of social time together.. like today I've been helping to get the van fixed..
We go out for meals.. but don't meet family etc.. not really a rule just doesn't fit. Although my kids know I go out places with lee..
Most of our rules are sexual ones.. safe sex with anyone but each other.. and I only swallow his Cum.
We talk everyday.. like I so with none sexual friends.
Cali |
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"We meet when its possible.
We go out for meals, walks and shopping together. And talk daily, usually after he gets home from the office.
We have no rules in how we feel about each other, we are best friends and that's all that matters.
And he dosnt see others, but I do "
have you asked him not too see others or is that his choice? How would you feel if he met someone? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For my fb of longstanding, i will cook the meal...he brings the wine and we have a lovely evening . we even swop xmas pressies 
But its been 6 years and he is my best friend .
Not sure i would do it again with someone else though ?
depends on the fella ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We spend a lot of social time together.. like today I've been helping to get the van fixed..
We go out for meals.. but don't meet family etc.. not really a rule just doesn't fit. Although my kids know I go out places with lee..
Most of our rules are sexual ones.. safe sex with anyone but each other.. and I only swallow his Cum.
We talk everyday.. like I so with none sexual friends.
Cali"
see I don't see that as a fuck buddie
if you introduce someone to your kids and make rules about what you can and cant do with others that goes beyond no string sex to me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just sex for mine. I have 3 long term, 2 I've been seeing for over 3 years and only went for a drink once with one of them on a first meeting. I don't want anything more from any of them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We spend a lot of social time together.. like today I've been helping to get the van fixed..
We go out for meals.. but don't meet family etc.. not really a rule just doesn't fit. Although my kids know I go out places with lee..
Most of our rules are sexual ones.. safe sex with anyone but each other.. and I only swallow his Cum.
We talk everyday.. like I so with none sexual friends.
Cali
see I don't see that as a fuck buddie
if you introduce someone to your kids and make rules about what you can and cant do with others that goes beyond no string sex to me "
They met him briefly while dropping something off.. they see him as a friend.. they enever see us together xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had 2 proper FWBs in the past, with both we were friends first and foremost so used to go for dinner, shopping or to the cinema etc together.
I'd like similar now as where does the friend part come into if you just stick to bedroom fun? it's just sex then. |
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By *tankyCouple
over a year ago
midlands |
I think it depends on the individual I have two fb's that i share trips away shopping and all the normal things including great sex if they meet someone else they would tell me and it would'nt be a problem and visa versa guess i'm lucky and have good guys. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had 2 proper FWBs in the past, with both we were friends first and foremost so used to go for dinner, shopping or to the cinema etc together.
I'd like similar now as where does the friend part come into if you just stick to bedroom fun? it's just sex then."
I suppose it depends what your after
some call them fuck buddies some friends with benefits
some are after friendship too some arnt
I find life simpler if I don't become friends with them, I prefer to just stick to the sex side, I have friends if I want to go out for a drink, meal or shopping I have guys off here if I want sex I prefer not to mix the two |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had 2 proper FWBs in the past, with both we were friends first and foremost so used to go for dinner, shopping or to the cinema etc together.
I'd like similar now as where does the friend part come into if you just stick to bedroom fun? it's just sex then.
I suppose it depends what your after
some call them fuck buddies some friends with benefits
some are after friendship too some arnt
I find life simpler if I don't become friends with them, I prefer to just stick to the sex side, I have friends if I want to go out for a drink, meal or shopping I have guys off here if I want sex I prefer not to mix the two "
I've known one for 4 years now, and have had breaks during that time but it is nice to have that friendship there. He knows my body inside and out and I feel 100% comfortable with him.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think deep down, some people are open to the idea of meeting someone here and to have such a relationship tests the waters of moving on to something else.
It's ok to have feelings. People just need to be honest about them.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It depends on the friend with benefits, I have some who I just have sex with and speak to occasionally. I have one who I speak to daily and we got out for meals and do other 'out of the bedroom' things together. Still all the same though, male friends who I have sex with. I don't have rules as such, but do work on a card system, one yellow, then a red and you're out!...I'm all for mutual respect and trust, just as I am with all my friends, otherwise they're not friends, simple in my eyes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It depends on the friend with benefits, I have some who I just have sex with and speak to occasionally. I have one who I speak to daily and we got out for meals and do other 'out of the bedroom' things together. Still all the same though, male friends who I have sex with. I don't have rules as such, but do work on a card system, one yellow, then a red and you're out!...I'm all for mutual respect and trust, just as I am with all my friends, otherwise they're not friends, simple in my eyes."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We meet, we fuck, we leave. Occasional messages, usually initiated by him, occasional phone sex. NEVER dinner or dates or anything like that
What if you both get hungry?
Lol I'll eat when I leave
I bet your FB smuggles sandwiches in his pockets and sneaks off to the toilet to eat them. "
He has better things to eat than sandwiches |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We meet, we fuck, we leave. Occasional messages, usually initiated by him, occasional phone sex. NEVER dinner or dates or anything like that
What if you both get hungry?
Lol I'll eat when I leave
I bet your FB smuggles sandwiches in his pockets and sneaks off to the toilet to eat them.
He has better things to eat than sandwiches "
How the hell does he fit a roast dinner in his pocket?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We meet when its possible.
We go out for meals, walks and shopping together. And talk daily, usually after he gets home from the office.
We have no rules in how we feel about each other, we are best friends and that's all that matters.
And he dosnt see others, but I do
have you asked him not too see others or is that his choice? How would you feel if he met someone? "
No I've never put constraints on him and one day he is going to meet someone, get married and hopefully have a family. And I would wish him all the luck in the world. X |
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"We meet when its possible.
We go out for meals, walks and shopping together. And talk daily, usually after he gets home from the office.
We have no rules in how we feel about each other, we are best friends and that's all that matters.
And he dosnt see others, but I do
have you asked him not too see others or is that his choice? How would you feel if he met someone?
No I've never put constraints on him and one day he is going to meet someone, get married and hopefully have a family. And I would wish him all the luck in the world. X "
its good you have that outlook lots of others don't x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We meet, we fuck, we leave. Occasional messages, usually initiated by him, occasional phone sex. NEVER dinner or dates or anything like that
What if you both get hungry?
Lol I'll eat when I leave
I bet your FB smuggles sandwiches in his pockets and sneaks off to the toilet to eat them.
He has better things to eat than sandwiches
How the hell does he fit a roast dinner in his pocket? "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only rule I have is when they come in my front door they give me their undivided attention. When they leave its back to the real world and don't care what they do until our next meet
"
This is how I am with regular meets,id never use the word fb or fwb though it suggests some sort of relationship and with relationships comes rules and compromises for one or both of you...... sod that!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We meet when its possible.
We go out for meals, walks and shopping together. And talk daily, usually after he gets home from the office.
We have no rules in how we feel about each other, we are best friends and that's all that matters.
And he dosnt see others, but I do
have you asked him not too see others or is that his choice? How would you feel if he met someone?
No I've never put constraints on him and one day he is going to meet someone, get married and hopefully have a family. And I would wish him all the luck in the world. X
its good you have that outlook lots of others don't x "
You know that saying..people come into your life for a reason? Well we both needed someone @ the time but with no complications and its worked really well upto now. We have both known where we stand from day one |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There has to be a few rules as I've had 2 fbs who get jealous when I play with others. Also it's about the fact that you like fucking together so get on with it often, not once in a blue moon.
3rd and 4th time lucky for me I hope. But just because it's no strings doesn't mean you have to be anonymous to each other unless that's what you want. Me personally - I don't do that kind of sex  |
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There is only one guy I go out for meals with etc, and we were friends long before the benefits part came into it and will be afterwards too. As has been said further up, I already have friends to do other things with, fab friends are just for the sex. It is a great advantage if you can become friends and get on as the sex gets better then, but I see no need to constantly speak to them or go out anywhere socially really apart from the initial coffee meet. It's not about rules though, as rules would indicate something more than no strings fun. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"He comes over when he can, we have amazing sex, I wave good bye, then follow him, sit in my car outside his house and watch the lights and curtains moving, switch on the hidden mic, I have planted in his suit jacket, and relay any conversations to my tape recorder.
In the morning, I follow at a discreet distance, to make sure he goes into work, then I go back to his house, with a briefcase, knock on the door, and talk to his wife, about insurance or double glazing, he has 3 nice kids, and love his furniture, usually get offered a cup of tea.
Luckily I am not the needy type, but Its nice to know about his other life.
Oh and he has a hamster and white Rabbit...
"
God this made me laugh!! |
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"I've had 2 proper FWBs in the past, with both we were friends first and foremost so used to go for dinner, shopping or to the cinema etc together.
I'd like similar now as where does the friend part come into if you just stick to bedroom fun? it's just sex then.
I suppose it depends what your after
some call them fuck buddies some friends with benefits
"
I was just thinking that - there are definitely two types here - FWB maybe are good friend with whom people have sex and the other more literally jut fuck buddies.
I want at least a FWB really, but a good reliable FB would be great! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oh to answer other questions..
We play with each other.. lee plays separate.. I can but choose not too. We play with other couples and have 3sums and moresums xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have a fb and you do have to be careful not to get feelings involved as its strictly "just sex" nothing personal should be involved. . once he leaves its back to reality and our own lives xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hmmm this is interesting. There are a couple of guys on here that I meet regularly but we don't have much contact in between. We get in touch when either of us wants a meet and for a couple of days leading up to the meet e get a bit flirty.
But right now this is how I prefer it to be. Things can get messy otherwise....I have been there and its something I don't want to go through again. I much prefer how things are now. Relaxed with no pressure. And this also means that if either of us meet anyone else and receive a verification, there is no hassle/jealousy from the other party, which can happen sometime. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think this thread shows there is a big difference between Fwb and fb xx"
And even a difference in fb to fb. It's interesting. I guess as long as both people are happy, that's the main thing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think this thread shows there is a big difference between Fwb and fb xx
And even a difference in fb to fb. It's interesting. I guess as long as both people are happy, that's the main thing. "
So so agree. Has all gone pair shaped for me before when the fb had found a new improved fb but not decided to call it off with me. I think common sense and a good dollop of honesty helps.
And were all adults. When it ends it ends - time for a new one, or two, or three  |
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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago
Retirement Village |
"I'm interested to know what 'rules' people have for their fb's/ fwb's.
Do you keep it to just sex or do you go out for meals etc?
How often do you meet each other?
Do you have rules about if one of you gets feelings?
Do you just meet each other one on one or do you meet other people together as 3somes or more-somes?"
i would be a friend first a lover second. So go out, chat, share problems and be there for each other. The only thing we wouldn't do is commitment / xclusivety.
If stronger feelings developed then i probably would be scared  though i would face it and see what happens |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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WE sleep together at least once a week at hers. She of loads on me. I lie there and listen. If we chat before sex it's usually generic (how's your week been?). If been several days without seeing each other we'll fuck straight away.
Have the occasional daytime session. I gave her a lift to the doctor's on my way home once. That's the only time we've been together out of her bedroom.
Been like this for over 8 months and not showing any signs of changing. Missed on overnight in all that time coz I had a problem with my car lights.
She was going to come on a Sun holiday long weekend with me and my children (which I would have liked coz it would have meant sex in the night) but she couldn't get the time of work.
It's working very well for NSA sex. She was one of my first meets off here
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The closest thing i have to a fwb is my new husband
He's a nilla gay man i work with but we instantly hit it off & he's really been a shoulder too me (swapping shifts when my littleone couldn't go to nursery) we go out for meals (& eye up the candy) we go food shopping together & i love him to bits. Now if i could just find the swinging equivalent 
In all seriousness though i don't think fbs/fwbs can be 'found from ads' i think its something that comes about when you click with someone |
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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago
Retirement Village |
"The closest thing i have to a fwb is my new husband
He's a nilla gay man i work with but we instantly hit it off & he's really been a shoulder too me (swapping shifts when my littleone couldn't go to nursery) we go out for meals (& eye up the candy) we go food shopping together & i love him to bits. Now if i could just find the swinging equivalent
In all seriousness though i don't think fbs/fwbs can be 'found from ads' i think its something that comes about when you click with someone "
*quietly waiting to be noticed* |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only rule I have is when they come in my front door they give me their undivided attention. When they leave its back to the real world and don't care what they do until our next meet
This would be how I would want it diamond. "
Same here x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm interested to know what 'rules' people have..
i would be a friend first a lover second. So go out, chat, share problems and be there for each other. The only thing we wouldn't do is commitment / xclusivety.
If stronger feelings developed then i probably would be scared though i would face it and see what happens"
And if you are the one with feelings and the other person doesn't.... Its not a great place to be...  |
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"The closest thing i have to a fwb is my new husband
He's a nilla gay man i work with but we instantly hit it off & he's really been a shoulder too me (swapping shifts when my littleone couldn't go to nursery) we go out for meals (& eye up the candy) we go food shopping together & i love him to bits. Now if i could just find the swinging equivalent
In all seriousness though i don't think fbs/fwbs can be 'found from ads' i think its something that comes about when you click with someone
*quietly waiting to be noticed* "
Now you're just openly flirting |
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By *uby0000Woman
over a year ago
hertfordshire |
my fb is a little possessive so I don't tell him if I see someone else ... see each other once a week usually
I will be gutted when my other young'un finds someone else cos he is lovely and I ve been seeing him four years but if hes happy im happy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think this thread shows there is a big difference between Fwb and fb xx
And even a difference in fb to fb. It's interesting. I guess as long as both people are happy, that's the main thing. "
I've had different dynamics with different guys. Used to see a guy at least once a week and regularly stay at his...even went over a couple of times and spent the night with no sex, which looking back now was a bit weird but at the time wasn't. Currently see my 'main' guy as often as he can manage around his shifts, son, sports and other commitments and although there are no 'sleep overs' when he is here it's very relaxed and intimate. We're in touch most days via text about life in general but there is no jealousy of another meet...if anything we like to see the other having fun. We're trying to meet as a couple too but just struggling for time at the minute.
Also have a few others that I'm in touch with but we don't play as often, just check in with each other really I guess between meets. Think if I were to try to put proper rules in place then it would feel too real so just play it all by ear and do what feels comfortable |
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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago
Retirement Village |
"The closest thing i have to a fwb is my new husband
He's a nilla gay man i work with but we instantly hit it off & he's really been a shoulder too me (swapping shifts when my littleone couldn't go to nursery) we go out for meals (& eye up the candy) we go food shopping together & i love him to bits. Now if i could just find the swinging equivalent
In all seriousness though i don't think fbs/fwbs can be 'found from ads' i think its something that comes about when you click with someone
*quietly waiting to be noticed*
Now you're just openly flirting "
2 questions is it that obvious
& is it working |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think this thread shows there is a big difference between Fwb and fb xx
And even a difference in fb to fb. It's interesting. I guess as long as both people are happy, that's the main thing.
I've had different dynamics with different guys. Used to see a guy at least once a week and regularly stay at his...even went over a couple of times and spent the night with no sex, which looking back now was a bit weird but at the time wasn't. Currently see my 'main' guy as often as he can manage around his shifts, son, sports and other commitments and although there are no 'sleep overs' when he is here it's very relaxed and intimate. We're in touch most days via text about life in general but there is no jealousy of another meet...if anything we like to see the other having fun. We're trying to meet as a couple too but just struggling for time at the minute.
Also have a few others that I'm in touch with but we don't play as often, just check in with each other really I guess between meets. Think if I were to try to put proper rules in place then it would feel too real so just play it all by ear and do what feels comfortable "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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..my fb is also my best friend. So, it's not just meeting for sex. We do meet for meals, going out for the day and do spend most of the day speaking to each other.
We don't really have any rules as such apart from being honest with each other and open. I think trust is key, as we have known each other for 4 years now.
She is older than me and does live in Nottingham. She has gone on dates and so forth and meets others. I don't want her holding herself back if she wants to look for 'love' and find someone that can give her something that i can't. And the same goes for me too.
Me and her just clicked when we first met, and we share everything together. And the sex just gets better and better everytime.
So, i guess we are more like best friends who like to fuck the brains out of each other lol.
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By *andy_tomMan
over a year ago
wolverhampton |
"A fuck buddy can be that special person in your life there has to be some sort of connection for it to work. As well as the thrill and putting that spark back in your love life. After all your both after the same thing. Love and affection as well as the sex. Ide all have needs. "
Make the rules up as you go along. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I didn't meet my FWB on here. He's totally vanilla and I picked him up @ work lol "
So did 1. I do have a couple of regular meets from fab, but my FwB takes precedence. |
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well about five years ago I had a fuck buddy we seen each other for a couple of years, tons of sex and we did go out for a drink or pictures from time to time, worked out really well, but she did end up with strong feelings for me, but I was not looking for a relationship at the time, so we stopped seeing each other so she could find a proper boyfriend,
She is now in a sexless relationship due to his medical condition, we have always kept in touch as friends, she is sexually frustrated and said she would love to fuck me again, but cant because she knows them feelings for me would return. I think feelings will always creep in if you see someone for a long time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No rules .. We meet regular and its not always for sex . We have been to the cinema and hes been over for meals ,shopping, been away together . My daughter knows about him and as she as met him loads of times.We all went away to a gig together. I regard him as my best friend and a amazing lover . We converse everyday via txt and just have a good friendship that happens to have great sex thrown in. We meet others seperatly and together and enjoy our one to ones. Plus hes on my wavelength so all in all one happy fabster
Doesnt work for everyone but certainly is working for me |
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