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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"How old?"
Almost 11.
Sorry, I realise I should give some more info. The girl in question is not my Daughter but I'm the one who has been asked to have the conversation with her. She has known me all her life and we are very close so I am comfortable talking about this with her, just not sure how to bring it up.
We're having a girly weekend in early May and this is when the deed shall be done. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"be blunt and to the point, dont sugar coat it, you'll just confuse the matter "
Not the kind of thing I can just blurt out though huh?!
It will be her birthday soon after and I'm wondering whether to broach it from the angle that she's getting older now and her body will be going through some changes.....? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
Why don't you ask her what she knows already about any changes that may occur as she grows and go from there?
You may find that she understands more than you think she does
My daughter was aware at that age as she had lesons at school and we spoke about it before then |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"How old?
Almost 11.
Sorry, I realise I should give some more info. The girl in question is not my Daughter but I'm the one who has been asked to have the conversation with her. She has known me all her life and we are very close so I am comfortable talking about this with her, just not sure how to bring it up.
We're having a girly weekend in early May and this is when the deed shall be done."
Both of my daughters has a sex talk/ period talk at school before they were 11 and when they got home it was just a case of asking did they have any questions.
Has she had any sex lessons at school? |
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By *zMaleMan
over a year ago
penzance |
Having got a daughter I would tell her sooner rather than later, as it is possible for her to start in the very near future. Better for her to know now than be shit scared when it happens.
You can't molley coddle it as this will only confuse her, she will be intelligent enough to understand.
My wife broached the subject, while they were out shopping and had to buy tampons, they had a discussion about it whilst sat in the car. My wife was always open and honest with the kids.
Hope this helps |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Apparently it's not been covered in school... which surprised me!
I did wonder whether her friends could have had the talk with their parents/guardians so they may have been talking about it between themselves already so that might make the chat a whole lot easier to have and of course I can make sure she's not scared of anything/hasn't heard any old wives tales etc and see if she has any questions.
"PS Although the only question one of them asked was......." is that why you told me off last week because I hadn't cleaned up my bedroom, because you were on a period "   "
HAHA love it! |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
Then I would do what others have said, bring the subject up in a casual way , like PZ said, sometimes the situation arises just out of an advert or you buying products yourself.
You will be able to see by her reaction wether she wants to talk about it or not....or even if she has more knowledge of the subject than you think.
My two reacted in totally different ways, one wanted to chat about it, one didn't, so although it is good to be open with children , they will only go at their own speed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
There are some good books for pre teens too
I did'nt want to talk to my Mum about any of that stuff do as im a complete bookworm she bought me books
My daughter and son also had books but were also happy to discuss any issues or ask questions about things they did'nt understand |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I think she'll be ok talking about it, although of course could completely surprise me and get all shy and quiet and I'll prepare for that to be a possibility.
It's a good idea maybe I'll take her with me to the shops or something and bring it up that way.
The books aren't a bad idea either incase she wants to take in the info on her own rather than me embarassing her by talking about it 
I'm racking my brain but I can't remember how, if or when I was ever told. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I remember my mum giving me a pack of Dr White's and telling me now I can't sleep with boys!!
I had no idea what she meant and was scared but got advice from the playground and school as mum was so inept at explaining.
For my own daughter's the kind of relationship we have they broached the subject - in fact they askes sooooo many questions about everything, I just answered them in a calm way.
When they started they were all still a little freaked but they were able to come and show me! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As a dad I never had the "before" talk but my daughter's mum and I were divorced long before this event took place. I used to collect my daughter every Friday night sometimes from school.
One Friday she got into the car from school and calmly announced "I come on today dad"
GULPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP caught me so offside I thought I was in the car park BUT I said oh ok were you alright? yes she said I just went to see Mrs XXX who was the PE teacher. That was it !!!!!
Funny though when she went on the pill a few years later a little early because of such terrible cramps her mum told me as she was embarrassed for me to know (according to her mum). She never did tell me herself lol !!!! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Funny though when she went on the pill a few years later a little early because of such terrible cramps her mum told me as she was embarrassed for me to know (according to her mum). She never did tell me herself lol !!!!"
Aww bless, maybe being that little older she was more aware of what else the pill is used for and so was a little more coy about how that could be seen?
I'm just having a scout around for some books that M might be able to relate to once I've had a chat with her. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Iv got a 10 year old girl and iv just bought her the book puberty girl by Shushann Movsessian, its got very high reviews.
All i have done before she got this book was to answer any questions she asked honestly, and iv done that from an early age, dont see the point in telling them stupid things like i was told when i was young like daddy put his tongue in mummys ear and make a joke of it, just to tell them something different when they are older.
Honesty is always the best policy IMO
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My daughter is 12 and she started her periods when she was 9, her boobs grew at 10 and now she's has quite a full figure. I left all that sorta pep talk stuff to her mum but my mother talked to her quite a lot about it all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i had the period chat with kiddo when she was 8, just the basics. im dreading the sex one but think she a bit more savvy than i was at that age. cant say im looking forward to it but any questions she has asked iv answered and tried to keep it simple enough for her to understand. the joys of parenthood lol x |
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