FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you tell people exactly what you think or do you sugarcoat as much as possible?
Do you tell people exactly what you think or do you sugarcoat as much as possible?
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"Depends who I'm talking to. On the whole yes I tell it how it is, but there are times when there's nothing wrong with a little sugar coating "
As long as you get your point across adequately?
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"Depends who I'm talking to. On the whole yes I tell it how it is, but there are times when there's nothing wrong with a little sugar coating As long as you get your point across adequately?"
Always....unless its my mother in law! There's just no telling some people  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Generally people who are brutally hones enjoy the brutality more than the honesty. I'm honest but tactful, diplomacy is essential not to offend Thats one helluva generalisation!  "
no just aimed at the brutally honest |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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people assume I will be blunt, and I can be - but don't like to hurt people! xx
and yes, I will get splinters on my arse for sitting right in the middle of this one! lol |
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"Generally people who are brutally hones enjoy the brutality more than the honesty. I'm honest but tactful, diplomacy is essential not to offend Thats one helluva generalisation! no just aimed at the brutally honest"
Interesting point of _iew.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Its my bad point.
Really is....but I say it straight out like it is.
I don't sugarcoat..I'll say it how it is.
Thats probably my worst thing.
Some say they know exactly where they are wuth me friends/fam etc..etc.but I can be blunt as hell. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This all comes down to honesty, tact and being constructive. You don't have to sugar coat a "no thank you, you're not what I'm looking for". However theres no need to say, "fuck off you fat, ugly bastard" either. |
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My instincts drive me to be blunt and honest and I know in the past I have offended.
I find myself in recent years being much more tactful in situations where I think it applies.
But I will always be fundamentally honest.
It amazes me how many people actually say they want you to be completely honest and then don't speak to you because you are! To many don't actually want the truth. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This all comes down to honesty, tact and being constructive. You don't have to sugar coat a "no thank you, you're not what I'm looking for". However theres no need to say, "fuck off you fat, ugly bastard" either. "
Haha!  |
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"In real life I tell it how it is , on here I sugar coat as I don't want to sit on naughty step. "
I know what you mean in real life circumstances some of the things that are posted on here would warrant a different reply |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In real life I tell it how it is , on here I sugar coat as I don't want to sit on naughty step.
I know what you mean in real life circumstances some of the things that are posted on here would warrant a different reply "
It's like own built in anger management course ,the threat of the naughty step |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In real life I tell it how it is , on here I sugar coat as I don't want to sit on naughty step. "
Ah but to someone's face is different with words on a screen that are easily misinterpreted then yes more thought to your response is required. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hell no! I won't sugar coat at all, what is the point. You can easily put across your feelings or opinion in a constructive way without having to lie.
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I don't lie , I just say how it is politely after first screaming obscenities at the screen |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think ultimately it comes diwn to thought before opening mouth aka self comtrol.
Yeah..I profoundly lack that stuff..you know the self control stuff!
Always have done. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hell no! I won't sugar coat at all, what is the point. You can easily put across your feelings or opinion in a constructive way without having to lie.
I don't lie , I just say how it is politely after first screaming obscenities at the screen "
Bit like count to 10 before I answer face to face |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hell no! I won't sugar coat at all, what is the point. You can easily put across your feelings or opinion in a constructive way without having to lie.
I don't lie , I just say how it is politely after first screaming obscenities at the screen "
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I very rarely mince my words.....I always try to be a truthful but tactful as I can be...people who know me well enough, get me...people who don't (understandably) think im a bitch....if a friend said to me "does my bum look big in this?" I would reply truthfully...why would I send a friend out looking not as good as she could be???...I also expect the same in return |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hell no! I won't sugar coat at all, what is the point. You can easily put across your feelings or opinion in a constructive way without having to lie.
I don't lie , I just say how it is politely after first screaming obscenities at the screen
Bit like count to 10 before I answer face to face "
Hmmm I think I may be doing something wrong then |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Somethings may need a little sugar to take the bitterness away
Theres never any need to be rude or agressive or nasty when putting a point across but of course some people will be offended at absolutely every opinion that is'nt the same as theirs so you can't possibly please everyone |
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"Somethings may need a little sugar to take the bitterness away
Theres never any need to be rude or agressive or nasty when putting a point across but of course some people will be offended at absolutely every opinion that is'nt the same as theirs so you can't possibly please everyone "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Generally people who are brutally hones enjoy the brutality more than the honesty. I'm honest but tactful, diplomacy is essential not to offend "
I totally agree, my ex used to bang on about his 'tell it as it is honesty' well really he was just a cruel, heartless, cold bully!.... 
So always tell the truth but dont be purposly hurtful is now my motto |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yeah I am tell it how it is but do try not to hurt people's feelings. The only problem is its normally left my mouth before my brain has been engaged so can come across as a twat with out meaning to.
Mr p |
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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago
glasgow |
much depends on the subject.
although i find sugarcoating often leads to prevarication,and
misinterpretation.when in fact many situations require unmistakable honesty.
so i definitely err on the blunt side.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i am honest and say what i think most of the time, but knowing how sensitive people on the forums can be i dont say what i realy think all of the time.
where my sons concerned i am careful what i say because i consider his feelings more than anyone elses.
i am tactful most of the time because when you have to see people every day you need to be able to get on with them.
you often find though with people who like to critisise you a lot, cant accept it when you critisise them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've stopped telling people 'how it is', unless I am explicitly asked.
I find that typically, people will only hear what they want to hear, anyway - and rarely want to hear about if from me!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I really fucking hate this thread brings out the real lmao
(Jokes)
I always say I how it is as fibe you earn more respect that way, but there are certain thing in life that you just have to sugar coat out of respect |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've stopped telling people 'how it is', unless I am explicitly asked.
I find that typically, people will only hear what they want to hear, anyway - and rarely want to hear about if from me!
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So true, people will only hear what they want to hear.
If someones made their mind up about you, they will only pick holes in the bits you say that they dont agree with, and ignore the rest of what you say. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Exactly what I think - specially in connection to the swinging world. I will have no truck with half-truths, 'fudging' (No, not THAT fudging!!!!!), deceit or, worse, lies. That's when people get hurt - badly.
And I make no apologies for 'saying it how I see it' in response to OP's in the forums - but you may have gathered that already....
ted. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Generally people who are brutally hones enjoy the brutality more than the honesty. I'm honest but tactful, diplomacy is essential not to offend Thats one helluva generalisation! no just aimed at the brutally honest"
i agree i find that too. I always try to end on a positive and sugar coat the negative as much as.however if you get some bloody minded people on here that can't take that and become abusive funny thing is then when you go to reply to point this out they blocked you .they were being brutely honest with me in a negative way .also don't care for messages off people i haven't met telling me how to change our profile to be better accepted on here ! Whats that about if you ?if don't like us don't message us simples or meet us at a social and see we not that scary really poppy being brutally honest in a sugar coated way .lol.xx |
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