FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Perfect Profile
Perfect Profile
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can we write the perfect profiles for a man, woman, tv/ts, gay man and woman, bi man and woman, and a couple?
Pick one and post it on here."
If I could I would have done by now lol |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Can we write the perfect profiles for a man, woman, tv/ts, gay man and woman, bi man and woman, and a couple?
Pick one and post it on here.
If I could I would have done by now lol"
You don't do a male one if you're male. Do one for the woman/other man etc. you would like to read and meet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The perfect profile doesn't exist - it's as real as a Unicorns tear carried away on the dreams of Princesses.
Each profile must be different as it should be a reflection of the user(s). All you can really give is a set of rules / guidelines / do's and don'ts. The rest is up to the one who writes it. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"The perfect profile doesn't exist - it's as real as a Unicorns tear carried away on the dreams of Princesses.
Each profile must be different as it should be a reflection of the user(s). All you can really give is a set of rules / guidelines / do's and don'ts. The rest is up to the one who writes it. "
What's wrong with writing a fairy tale where the Unicorn tears bless the dreams of a Fab Princess? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Bigdonna1
Curvy female couple looking for male to share bed times, bath times, and play time, must be willing to watch us get filthy and join in when he wants, I work at a brewery and have bottles of beer piling up in the fridge that I would ask you to try and empty once in a while my partner is a porn star so she brings her work friends home all the time and they spend most of their time naked around the house.
Looks aren't important but we at both partial to a bit of meat on a man.
I know it's a long shot but I hope we hear from someone soon |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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How about....
I can be anything you want me too be and more……
But just don’t call me a bitch unless you want the heel of my stiletto rammed right up ya hoop…    |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The perfect profile doesn't exist - it's as real as a Unicorns tear carried away on the dreams of Princesses.
Each profile must be different as it should be a reflection of the user(s). All you can really give is a set of rules / guidelines / do's and don'ts. The rest is up to the one who writes it.
What's wrong with writing a fairy tale where the Unicorn tears bless the dreams of a Fab Princess?"
Get in the queue, Princess! I'm still waiting for my Rainbow farting Unicorn....  |
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By *hecat007Woman
over a year ago
Round the corner |
"Bigdonna1
Curvy female couple looking for male to share bed times, bath times, and play time, must be willing to watch us get filthy and join in when he wants, I work at a brewery and have bottles of beer piling up in the fridge that I would ask you to try and empty once in a while my partner is a porn star so she brings her work friends home all the time and they spend most of their time naked around the house.
Looks aren't important but we at both partial to a bit of meat on a man.
I know it's a long shot but I hope we hear from someone soon"
... Love this  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The perfect profile doesn't exist - it's as real as a Unicorns tear carried away on the dreams of Princesses.
Each profile must be different as it should be a reflection of the user(s). All you can really give is a set of rules / guidelines / do's and don'ts. The rest is up to the one who writes it. "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"How about....
I can be anything you want me too be and more……
But just don’t call me a bitch unless you want the heel of my stiletto rammed right up ya hoop… "
Love it!!  |
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By *ancatMan
over a year ago
Norwich |
"The perfect profile doesn't exist - it's as real as a Unicorns tear carried away on the dreams of Princesses.
Each profile must be different as it should be a reflection of the user(s). All you can really give is a set of rules / guidelines / do's and don'ts. The rest is up to the one who writes it.
"
So true |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Bigdonna1
Curvy female couple looking for male to share bed times, bath times, and play time, must be willing to watch us get filthy and join in when he wants, I work at a brewery and have bottles of beer piling up in the fridge that I would ask you to try and empty once in a while my partner is a porn star so she brings her work friends home all the time and they spend most of their time naked around the house.
Looks aren't important but we at both partial to a bit of meat on a man.
I know it's a long shot but I hope we hear from someone soon"
That's a cut and paste isn't it? |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Write one for me if you like Lickety "
My name tells you the most important things you need to know: we are regal, worthy of respect and know how to rule with so as to be beloved of our subjects. The tease speaks as much of our enigmatic mystery as to the cut and thrust of flirting and sexual teasing. As with all queens, we expect quality, respect and discretion in all that happens.
We are also queen-sized. We are petite and perfectly formed. Blonde, green eyes but never green-eyed. we do not own ones subjects and they do not own one.
To get this queen's "by appointment" seal of approval you will present yourself in a manner that engages our mind, our humour and our eye in the first instance. Thereafter you will please our senses to the point where you have enjoyed time in our company and we have the desire to bestow our warrant on you.
If none of that entices you we should also point out that we are a kinky queen and that rarest of creatures, the single bi-female.
Applications in writing only. We the queen are not able to reply to all requests for an audience but we thank you for your interest.
How's that? |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"If I could do a better job than what I have now I'd keep it for myself
I'm tempted to write yours...
I'm not sure if thats a good thing or bad thing?  "
I've just done QoT's so I will look at your and have a think. |
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"If I could do a better job than what I have now I'd keep it for myself
I'm tempted to write yours...
I'm not sure if thats a good thing or bad thing?
I've just done QoT's so I will look at your and have a think."
It's brilliant!! |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"If I could do a better job than what I have now I'd keep it for myself
I'm tempted to write yours...
I'm not sure if thats a good thing or bad thing?
I've just done QoT's so I will look at your and have a think.
It's brilliant!! "
Thank you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Write one for me if you like Lickety
My name tells you the most important things you need to know: we are regal, worthy of respect and know how to rule with so as to be beloved of our subjects. The tease speaks as much of our enigmatic mystery as to the cut and thrust of flirting and sexual teasing. As with all queens, we expect quality, respect and discretion in all that happens.
We are also queen-sized. We are petite and perfectly formed. Blonde, green eyes but never green-eyed. we do not own ones subjects and they do not own one.
To get this queen's "by appointment" seal of approval you will present yourself in a manner that engages our mind, our humour and our eye in the first instance. Thereafter you will please our senses to the point where you have enjoyed time in our company and we have the desire to bestow our warrant on you.
If none of that entices you we should also point out that we are a kinky queen and that rarest of creatures, the single bi-female.
Applications in writing only. We the queen are not able to reply to all requests for an audience but we thank you for your interest.
How's that?"
Love it !!! Thank You
This Queen is Amused and bestows a Royal seal of Approval.. Arise Dame Lickety |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Write one for me if you like Lickety
My name tells you the most important things you need to know: we are regal, worthy of respect and know how to rule with so as to be beloved of our subjects. The tease speaks as much of our enigmatic mystery as to the cut and thrust of flirting and sexual teasing. As with all queens, we expect quality, respect and discretion in all that happens.
We are also queen-sized. We are petite and perfectly formed. Blonde, green eyes but never green-eyed. we do not own ones subjects and they do not own one.
To get this queen's "by appointment" seal of approval you will present yourself in a manner that engages our mind, our humour and our eye in the first instance. Thereafter you will please our senses to the point where you have enjoyed time in our company and we have the desire to bestow our warrant on you.
If none of that entices you we should also point out that we are a kinky queen and that rarest of creatures, the single bi-female.
Applications in writing only. We the queen are not able to reply to all requests for an audience but we thank you for your interest.
How's that?
Love it !!! Thank You
This Queen is Amused and bestows a Royal seal of Approval.. Arise Dame Lickety "
Deep curtsy to show off cleavage and thanks the queen for her benevolence, especially as there is a word missing. It should read "know how to rule with grace so as". I do apologise.  |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Any1 fancys doing mine feel free you cant make it any worse "
Yours is as long as meats... I'll add it to my thinking pile. These long ones are difficult to precis and still keep a voice. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Any1 fancys doing mine feel free you cant make it any worse
Yours is as long as meats... I'll add it to my thinking pile. These long ones are difficult to precis and still keep a voice."
Typical woman- you write a 2 line profile and she moans- you write an epic and she moans......cant win |
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"Any1 fancys doing mine feel free you cant make it any worse
Yours is as long as meats... I'll add it to my thinking pile. These long ones are difficult to precis and still keep a voice."
pmsl couldn't agree more way to long I even got bored writing it |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Any1 fancys doing mine feel free you cant make it any worse
Yours is as long as meats... I'll add it to my thinking pile. These long ones are difficult to precis and still keep a voice.
Typical woman- you write a 2 line profile and she moans- you write an epic and she moans......cant win "
You know it's the same as cocks: too small and you're looking for more, too big and you're looking for lube.
I haven't given up yet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Write one for me if you like Lickety
My name tells you the most important things you need to know: we are regal, worthy of respect and know how to rule with so as to be beloved of our subjects. The tease speaks as much of our enigmatic mystery as to the cut and thrust of flirting and sexual teasing. As with all queens, we expect quality, respect and discretion in all that happens.
We are also queen-sized. We are petite and perfectly formed. Blonde, green eyes but never green-eyed. we do not own ones subjects and they do not own one.
To get this queen's "by appointment" seal of approval you will present yourself in a manner that engages our mind, our humour and our eye in the first instance. Thereafter you will please our senses to the point where you have enjoyed time in our company and we have the desire to bestow our warrant on you.
If none of that entices you we should also point out that we are a kinky queen and that rarest of creatures, the single bi-female.
Applications in writing only. We the queen are not able to reply to all requests for an audience but we thank you for your interest.
How's that?
Love it !!! Thank You
This Queen is Amused and bestows a Royal seal of Approval.. Arise Dame Lickety
Deep curtsy to show off cleavage and thanks the queen for her benevolence, especially as there is a word missing. It should read "know how to rule with grace so as". I do apologise. "
Its perfect and also my new profile |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Write one for me if you like Lickety
My name tells you the most important things you need to know: we are regal, worthy of respect and know how to rule with so as to be beloved of our subjects. The tease speaks as much of our enigmatic mystery as to the cut and thrust of flirting and sexual teasing. As with all queens, we expect quality, respect and discretion in all that happens.
We are also queen-sized. We are petite and perfectly formed. Blonde, green eyes but never green-eyed. we do not own ones subjects and they do not own one.
To get this queen's "by appointment" seal of approval you will present yourself in a manner that engages our mind, our humour and our eye in the first instance. Thereafter you will please our senses to the point where you have enjoyed time in our company and we have the desire to bestow our warrant on you.
If none of that entices you we should also point out that we are a kinky queen and that rarest of creatures, the single bi-female.
Applications in writing only. We the queen are not able to reply to all requests for an audience but we thank you for your interest.
How's that?
Love it !!! Thank You
This Queen is Amused and bestows a Royal seal of Approval.. Arise Dame Lickety
Deep curtsy to show off cleavage and thanks the queen for her benevolence, especially as there is a word missing. It should read "know how to rule with grace so as". I do apologise.
Its perfect and also my new profile "
I love it!!
Go on Lickety write mine please, pretty please |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Write one for me if you like Lickety
My name tells you the most important things you need to know: we are regal, worthy of respect and know how to rule with so as to be beloved of our subjects. The tease speaks as much of our enigmatic mystery as to the cut and thrust of flirting and sexual teasing. As with all queens, we expect quality, respect and discretion in all that happens.
We are also queen-sized. We are petite and perfectly formed. Blonde, green eyes but never green-eyed. we do not own ones subjects and they do not own one.
To get this queen's "by appointment" seal of approval you will present yourself in a manner that engages our mind, our humour and our eye in the first instance. Thereafter you will please our senses to the point where you have enjoyed time in our company and we have the desire to bestow our warrant on you.
If none of that entices you we should also point out that we are a kinky queen and that rarest of creatures, the single bi-female.
Applications in writing only. We the queen are not able to reply to all requests for an audience but we thank you for your interest.
How's that?
Love it !!! Thank You
This Queen is Amused and bestows a Royal seal of Approval.. Arise Dame Lickety
Deep curtsy to show off cleavage and thanks the queen for her benevolence, especially as there is a word missing. It should read "know how to rule with grace so as". I do apologise.
Its perfect and also my new profile
I love it!!
Go on Lickety write mine please, pretty please "
I'll see what I can do. Although this wasn't the plan. The plan was that others would write profiles, not just me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Write one for me if you like Lickety
My name tells you the most important things you need to know: we are regal, worthy of respect and know how to rule with so as to be beloved of our subjects. The tease speaks as much of our enigmatic mystery as to the cut and thrust of flirting and sexual teasing. As with all queens, we expect quality, respect and discretion in all that happens.
We are also queen-sized. We are petite and perfectly formed. Blonde, green eyes but never green-eyed. we do not own ones subjects and they do not own one.
To get this queen's "by appointment" seal of approval you will present yourself in a manner that engages our mind, our humour and our eye in the first instance. Thereafter you will please our senses to the point where you have enjoyed time in our company and we have the desire to bestow our warrant on you.
If none of that entices you we should also point out that we are a kinky queen and that rarest of creatures, the single bi-female.
Applications in writing only. We the queen are not able to reply to all requests for an audience but we thank you for your interest.
How's that?
Love it !!! Thank You
This Queen is Amused and bestows a Royal seal of Approval.. Arise Dame Lickety
Deep curtsy to show off cleavage and thanks the queen for her benevolence, especially as there is a word missing. It should read "know how to rule with grace so as". I do apologise.
Its perfect and also my new profile
I love it!!
Go on Lickety write mine please, pretty please
I'll see what I can do. Although this wasn't the plan. The plan was that others would write profiles, not just me."
You are proving you have far much more imagination than us lot |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Write one for me if you like Lickety
My name tells you the most important things you need to know: we are regal, worthy of respect and know how to rule with so as to be beloved of our subjects. The tease speaks as much of our enigmatic mystery as to the cut and thrust of flirting and sexual teasing. As with all queens, we expect quality, respect and discretion in all that happens.
We are also queen-sized. We are petite and perfectly formed. Blonde, green eyes but never green-eyed. we do not own ones subjects and they do not own one.
To get this queen's "by appointment" seal of approval you will present yourself in a manner that engages our mind, our humour and our eye in the first instance. Thereafter you will please our senses to the point where you have enjoyed time in our company and we have the desire to bestow our warrant on you.
If none of that entices you we should also point out that we are a kinky queen and that rarest of creatures, the single bi-female.
Applications in writing only. We the queen are not able to reply to all requests for an audience but we thank you for your interest.
How's that?
Love it !!! Thank You
This Queen is Amused and bestows a Royal seal of Approval.. Arise Dame Lickety
Deep curtsy to show off cleavage and thanks the queen for her benevolence, especially as there is a word missing. It should read "know how to rule with grace so as". I do apologise.
Its perfect and also my new profile "
Oh my Gawd - so it is!!!
Lickety - I demand to be your Fabs Profiles Literary Agent - this time next year, I'll be a millwionaire!!!!!
ted. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Any1 fancys doing mine feel free you cant make it any worse
Yours is as long as meats... I'll add it to my thinking pile. These long ones are difficult to precis and still keep a voice.
pmsl couldn't agree more way to long I even got bored writing it "
Here goes
Newly single but not new to getting in the swing of things with a bit of banter, a smile and some laughs.
Life is serious but swinging isn't.
The life of the single male is not always easy on Fab but it is made all the more pleasurable by spending the odd moment or twenty on the forum. Come and join in and get to know me and some of the other witty, attractive men that hang out there. Don't get to know the others too well though as I am your man.
My spelling is bad and when I get excited it can fall apart a bit. This does not make me thick or insensitive. I will treat you with respect and expect the same in return. There is no need to be nasty (except in a kinky sexual way) with swinging. Press the wrong buttons and I will bite. Press the right buttons and we'll have a wonderful time together.
I am confident in my skin, in my abilities and I am not desperate enough to pursue everything that moves on Fab.
I am looking to meet women but I enjoy the odd 3sum. I like to get to know you and for you to know me.
I also have the sexual calorie counter at my fingertips, so if you are looking to use up some calories as part of your fitness routine then get in touch.
Happy swinging.
How's that? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
A single male profile...
"Ladies, I am on the point of wearing out the third Fleshlight I have bought this year. Will you be the one to save me the cost of buying a new one...?
I am that reliable the only woman I have ever let down cost £12.99 from my local sex shop and didn't arf take some blowing up...
I'm a WE (Sky remote + 1.578934") guy who loves a laugh.... well, it helps to cover the rejection from all the deleted messages, doesn't it.
I am great at oral - I gargle three times a day - and am happy to travel. I keep my 1978 Morris Marina fully fuelled and the drivers manual says a full tank will take me over 300 miles so I can/will go anywhere on the UK mainland for meets. But round the corner would be nice and I promise not to acknowledge you in the pasta aisle in ASDA if we should ever bump into each other again.
Oh, by the way, would you mind if I brought my mate Kevin cos he's not been out with a woman since 1986 and he's kind of out of practice?
PM me anytime...... "
.
.
And, no, I am not going to make that my new single guy profile..... well,.... maybe...
ted. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"
Oh my Gawd - so it is!!!
Lickety - I demand to be your Fabs Profiles Literary Agent - this time next year, I'll be a millwionaire!!!!!
ted. "
Big Teddy Ted, it's part of my voluntary work (and much more interesting than the thing I have to finish writing). Having said that, if you feel you can, erm, market me to some of the desirable forum folk then who am I to obstruct your talents. I need to be experience swinging in order to remain inspired. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"A single male profile...
"Ladies, I am on the point of wearing out the third Fleshlight I have bought this year. Will you be the one to save me the cost of buying a new one...?
I am that reliable the only woman I have ever let down cost £12.99 from my local sex shop and didn't arf take some blowing up...
I'm a WE (Sky remote + 1.578934") guy who loves a laugh.... well, it helps to cover the rejection from all the deleted messages, doesn't it.
I am great at oral - I gargle three times a day - and am happy to travel. I keep my 1978 Morris Marina fully fuelled and the drivers manual says a full tank will take me over 300 miles so I can/will go anywhere on the UK mainland for meets. But round the corner would be nice and I promise not to acknowledge you in the pasta aisle in ASDA if we should ever bump into each other again.
Oh, by the way, would you mind if I brought my mate Kevin cos he's not been out with a woman since 1986 and he's kind of out of practice?
PM me anytime...... "
.
.
And, no, I am not going to make that my new single guy profile..... well,.... maybe...
ted."
I would do you if only it was a Morris Minor. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Oh my Gawd - so it is!!!
Lickety - I demand to be your Fabs Profiles Literary Agent - this time next year, I'll be a millwionaire!!!!!
ted.
Big Teddy Ted, it's part of my voluntary work (and much more interesting than the thing I have to finish writing). Having said that, if you feel you can, erm, market me to some of the desirable forum folk then who am I to obstruct your talents. I need to be experience swinging in order to remain inspired."
(retires to set up the odd 'deal')
20% comm okay wiv you, moy dear.....
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"A single male profile...
"Ladies, I am on the point of wearing out the third Fleshlight I have bought this year. Will you be the one to save me the cost of buying a new one...?
I am that reliable the only woman I have ever let down cost £12.99 from my local sex shop and didn't arf take some blowing up...
I'm a WE (Sky remote + 1.578934") guy who loves a laugh.... well, it helps to cover the rejection from all the deleted messages, doesn't it.
I am great at oral - I gargle three times a day - and am happy to travel. I keep my 1978 Morris Marina fully fuelled and the drivers manual says a full tank will take me over 300 miles so I can/will go anywhere on the UK mainland for meets. But round the corner would be nice and I promise not to acknowledge you in the pasta aisle in ASDA if we should ever bump into each other again.
Oh, by the way, would you mind if I brought my mate Kevin cos he's not been out with a woman since 1986 and he's kind of out of practice?
PM me anytime...... "
.
.
And, no, I am not going to make that my new single guy profile..... well,.... maybe...
ted.
I would do you if only it was a Morris Minor."
Did I say Marina? I meant Minor of course.....
(now THERE's a single guy wriggle for ya...) |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Bloody hell lick thats fantastic. You mind if I use it ? You obviously have a gift for this thank you x"
Of course you can use it. Just put somewhere that the spelling may not always reflect your return messages. I don't want people suing me on the sales of goods act. |
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"Bloody hell lick thats fantastic. You mind if I use it ? You obviously have a gift for this thank you x
Of course you can use it. Just put somewhere that the spelling may not always reflect your return messages. I don't want people suing me on the sales of goods act."
lmao what could you mean im all that and more. Thanks again |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"
I love it!!
Go on Lickety write mine please, pretty please
oi back of the queue you
Never "
Here goes...
Welcome to my single profile and the reason you are really here... yes, go on and perv the public pictures - I put them on JUST FOR YOU!
When you have looked at them come back and read the rest of this profile.
Ready now?
I know this will disappoint some of you but I never play without my partner. We have a couples profile on here too (just look for my name and add a bit - you'll spot me in the pictures). I will meet friends socially from this profile. I also use this to post on the forum.
I am sorry there is more disappointment to come: you will never be "the one" that will convince me to drop everything and meet you because you are free now. It will save you time and frustration if you accept this now.
My inbox gets full so if I do not reply to you please accept that means no.
If you want to find me look on the forum and join in.
Go on, look at the pictures again. You have earned it by getting all the way down here. Have fun.
Julie, does that do it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I love it!!
Go on Lickety write mine please, pretty please
oi back of the queue you
Never
Here goes...
Welcome to my single profile and the reason you are really here... yes, go on and perv the public pictures - I put them on JUST FOR YOU!
When you have looked at them come back and read the rest of this profile.
Ready now?
I know this will disappoint some of you but I never play without my partner. We have a couples profile on here too (just look for my name and add a bit - you'll spot me in the pictures). I will meet friends socially from this profile. I also use this to post on the forum.
I am sorry there is more disappointment to come: you will never be "the one" that will convince me to drop everything and meet you because you are free now. It will save you time and frustration if you accept this now.
My inbox gets full so if I do not reply to you please accept that means no.
If you want to find me look on the forum and join in.
Go on, look at the pictures again. You have earned it by getting all the way down here. Have fun.
Julie, does that do it?"
Love it!!
You have missed you calling!!
Thank you so much |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I love it!!
Go on Lickety write mine please, pretty please
oi back of the queue you
Never
Here goes...
Welcome to my single profile and the reason you are really here... yes, go on and perv the public pictures - I put them on JUST FOR YOU!
When you have looked at them come back and read the rest of this profile.
Ready now?
I know this will disappoint some of you but I never play without my partner. We have a couples profile on here too (just look for my name and add a bit - you'll spot me in the pictures). I will meet friends socially from this profile. I also use this to post on the forum.
I am sorry there is more disappointment to come: you will never be "the one" that will convince me to drop everything and meet you because you are free now. It will save you time and frustration if you accept this now.
My inbox gets full so if I do not reply to you please accept that means no.
If you want to find me look on the forum and join in.
Go on, look at the pictures again. You have earned it by getting all the way down here. Have fun.
Julie, does that do it?
Love it!!
You have missed you calling!!
Thank you so much "
* your |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I want one , I want one please
I can see that Meat is never going to get done at this rate. Ok, one night only. I have to finish my real writing tomorrow now."
thank you kindly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I can see that Meat is never going to get done at this rate....
Story of my life 
It's long and complex and I am struggling to get a voice for you. Draft one was terrible."
To be fair- inside my head is a weird and scary place- i don't always like going in there myself |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"One night only? Go on then Ms Licky. Do me one please...
How will I improve on perfection and in Scottish?"
I want one
Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Mmmwwwaaaah
|
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I want one , I want one please
I can see that Meat is never going to get done at this rate. Ok, one night only. I have to finish my real writing tomorrow now.
thank you kindly "
And for T&T we have:
Welcome into the fabled land of Tease and Temptation. It's a magical place and I wish to keep it magical at all times. It's full of chat on the forum and staying in touch with friends and just sometimes someone will manage to tease and tempt me enough to invite them into my magical place.
To keep that magic means that you understand that my children come first, always. I will never arrange to meet you at the drop of your hat, I won't be tempted if you offer me your DIY skills nor if your message is a blatant cut and paste. You can guess by now how I might feel about the one liner "what you doing now" or the "fancy a..."
You won't be able to get around me with your random friend request but I may take a peek when you're not looking.
For those that fall into those categories above I suggest you use your DIY skills and take care of yourselves. I won't be joining you.
I am your average woman, slightly on the sub side but not a doormat happy to have crap scraped onto it. I am not judgmental and I like to feel a spark, a connection, a reason to want to meet. Wit, humour, patience, and good communication will all help your cause.
I use my phone for Fab so no cam or phone sex from me - ever.
I really am lovely and quite nice, all my friends tell me so, unless pissed off. Please, no bad vibes in my magical place.
Come on and tease and tempt me if you have understood and if you really have I will be Tease and Temptation for you.
That one was quite hard to do. I will not be offended if you think it's rubbish. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"
I can see that Meat is never going to get done at this rate....
Story of my life
It's long and complex and I am struggling to get a voice for you. Draft one was terrible.
To be fair- inside my head is a weird and scary place- i don't always like going in there myself "
I suspect I would have to meet you to get a sense of what should be on yours. I have one of those heads too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Can we write the perfect profiles for a man, woman, tv/ts, gay man and woman, bi man and woman, and a couple?
Pick one and post it on here."
Me what about mine lol xx |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"One night only? Go on then Ms Licky. Do me one please...
How will I improve on perfection and in Scottish?
I want one
Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Mmmwwwaaaah
"
Calm down! I'm getting bloody RSI here. You're next. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"One night only? Go on then Ms Licky. Do me one please...
How will I improve on perfection and in Scottish?
I want one
Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Mmmwwwaaaah
Calm down! I'm getting bloody RSI here. You're next."
Ok I will wait here patiently promise!! |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Can we write the perfect profiles for a man, woman, tv/ts, gay man and woman, bi man and woman, and a couple?
Pick one and post it on here."
no such thing as a perfect profile, and I think it creates a false illusion
the one thing we tell people when they ask for advice is that in the end you are not trying to appeal to everyone, just those you are trying to meet....
all that you will end up doing is creating a generic profile that will end up appealing to no one.....
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I want one , I want one please
I can see that Meat is never going to get done at this rate. Ok, one night only. I have to finish my real writing tomorrow now.
thank you kindly
And for T&T we have:
Welcome into the fabled land of Tease and Temptation. It's a magical place and I wish to keep it magical at all times. It's full of chat on the forum and staying in touch with friends and just sometimes someone will manage to tease and tempt me enough to invite them into my magical place.
To keep that magic means that you understand that my children come first, always. I will never arrange to meet you at the drop of your hat, I won't be tempted if you offer me your DIY skills nor if your message is a blatant cut and paste. You can guess by now how I might feel about the one liner "what you doing now" or the "fancy a..."
You won't be able to get around me with your random friend request but I may take a peek when you're not looking.
For those that fall into those categories above I suggest you use your DIY skills and take care of yourselves. I won't be joining you.
I am your average woman, slightly on the sub side but not a doormat happy to have crap scraped onto it. I am not judgmental and I like to feel a spark, a connection, a reason to want to meet. Wit, humour, patience, and good communication will all help your cause.
I use my phone for Fab so no cam or phone sex from me - ever.
I really am lovely and quite nice, all my friends tell me so, unless pissed off. Please, no bad vibes in my magical place.
Come on and tease and tempt me if you have understood and if you really have I will be Tease and Temptation for you.
That one was quite hard to do. I will not be offended if you think it's rubbish."
I love it and its much better than my own, thanks very much, I owe you a drink |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Oi, I asked first Woman!!!
And??
Get to the back! "
You're supposed to be waiting PATIENTLY.
Here it is:
Ooo! Hello, thanks for dropping by. Pull up a pew and let's have a chat.
We have been here for a year or so and we really do like this spot. It has been fun meeting single men and couples. We have had the odd nuisance call from married/attached and bi men and couples that are really FBs, we don't mind what they get up to but it's not for us.
What's that? Yes, we're married. I know people find it odd that he's so tall (6'4", broad shoulders and all quiet and broody) and I'm so small (5'1", a petite size 8 and so sweet and innocent) but it more than works for us.
We're happy, secure and still in love. We might come across as shy but every once in a while our halos slip and we have some fun. We are comfortable in a group situation and Lucy might get a little more than curious about her bi side as well as indulging in a little sinful greed, in the right circumstances. Luke always knows that he has absolutely no bi side.
We like to get to know people on here and on the phone before arranging a social meet. If everyone is getting on well then we can take it from there.
Do pop a message through the door if you think we'd like you and you like us.
Cheerio for now. |
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"Oi, I asked first Woman!!!
I thought Lucy has asked earlier in the thread and I ignored her.
Yours is going to be difficult as I think the beginning section is pretty spot on."
Good work lickety very impressive. We just wish every profile we read/replied to was as honest as ours |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Oi, I asked first Woman!!!
I thought Lucy has asked earlier in the thread and I ignored her.
Yours is going to be difficult as I think the beginning section is pretty spot on.
Good work lickety very impressive. We just wish every profile we read/replied to was as honest as ours "
I haven't done _muma's yet. All credit goes to her. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Oi, I asked first Woman!!!
And??
Get to the back!
Ach, wheesht ya whinge "
To be translated into Scottish...
Tease me. please me. Flash me. Smash me. wank me. thank me. strip me. whip me. flick me. lick me. bum me. cum on me. play me. spray me. suck me. fuck me.....
and then start all over AGAIN!!!!
Now read the whole profile please!!
**ONLY BACK FOR A FEW MONTHS AND WILL ONLY BE ARRANGING OCCASIONAL MEETS WITH PEOPLE I ALREADY KNOW AND TALK TO. SORRY, BUT WON'T BE ARRANGING ANY NEW ONES FOR THE TIME BEING**
Are you feeling brave? Then come on in.
I'm single, slim, funny and smoking hot. I look for a bit of fun now and then to add sparkle to the day, or night. Life isn't for taking too seriously and I like to laugh, drink a bit, smoke a bit and talk a lot. A warm welcome is guaranteed in my message if you meet what I am looking for.
I am also horny, insatiable and adventurous - I'll give most things a go at least once.
I can rarely do short-notice meets and always meet socially first. I'm not bi, I don't give in under pressure and I don't accept friend invites just because you sent me one. My age preferences are specific but allowances can be made at my discretion. I won't cam for you or give you phone sex so there is no point in asking. Expecting anything else means you will be disappointed and it will your fault not mine.
I also know the off-side rule and give better than I get on footy knowledge.
Are you still feeling brave enough? OK then, send a face picture with your message if you want a reply.
LEGAL DISCLAIMER: I am a feckin gobby cow, moody, abrupt and pretty much mainly miserable. I swear as good as a tic supporter and basically dinnae give a shite if you like it or not... That's just me, don't try and change me.
I didn't change much. I'm getting tired now I think.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Oi, I asked first Woman!!!
And??
Get to the back!
You're supposed to be waiting PATIENTLY.
Here it is:
Ooo! Hello, thanks for dropping by. Pull up a pew and let's have a chat.
We have been here for a year or so and we really do like this spot. It has been fun meeting single men and couples. We have had the odd nuisance call from married/attached and bi men and couples that are really FBs, we don't mind what they get up to but it's not for us.
What's that? Yes, we're married. I know people find it odd that he's so tall (6'4", broad shoulders and all quiet and broody) and I'm so small (5'1", a petite size 8 and so sweet and innocent) but it more than works for us.
We're happy, secure and still in love. We might come across as shy but every once in a while our halos slip and we have some fun. We are comfortable in a group situation and Lucy might get a little more than curious about her bi side as well as indulging in a little sinful greed, in the right circumstances. Luke always knows that he has absolutely no bi side.
We like to get to know people on here and on the phone before arranging a social meet. If everyone is getting on well then we can take it from there.
Do pop a message through the door if you think we'd like you and you like us.
Cheerio for now."
Oh that's brill!!
Pleased to see you remembered my sweet and innocent side x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I can see that Meat is never going to get done at this rate....
Story of my life
It's long and complex and I am struggling to get a voice for you. Draft one was terrible.
To be fair- inside my head is a weird and scary place- i don't always like going in there myself
I suspect I would have to meet you to get a sense of what should be on yours. I have one of those heads too."
I annoy someone off here as she can't second guess me easily
Next time i'm coming down that there fancy London I shall give you a shout to see if you're free and nearby for beer/coffee |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Oh that's brill!!
Pleased to see you remembered my sweet and innocent side x
You are welcome. How could anyone forget you are angelic?"
Is your name down for the Kent social? |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"
Oh that's brill!!
Pleased to see you remembered my sweet and innocent side x
You are welcome. How could anyone forget you are angelic?
Is your name down for the Kent social? "
I'm not sure where I am going to be. I want to come if I can but it's the weekend of a friend's 50th and we might all be going away. Or not. I just do as I am told. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Love it Lickety lol. Cheers x
Thank you.
My work here is done and only one job left in an unsatisfactory state. Sorry Meat."
I'm so used to being left on the shelf i'm getting my post sent here  |
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» Add a new message to this topic
think you got the wrong thread 
