FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Punching above your weight
Punching above your weight
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Im sure its happened to lots of people on here down through the years. You walk into a bar/club and see someone and you think whoooarr....but you won't approach them because you think you wouldn't stand a chance.
Have you ever looked at a profile and just passed it by, for the only reason that you think you'd be punching above your weight...? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think that's a funny one because physically it can happen a lot, sometimes you just click with people and can convince them that they are attracted to you. I have no problems with approaching a girl in a bar that I think is out of my league, and I do alright  ! Xxx |
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There no harm in just going for a chat and anything else is a bonus. girls in there 20's don't appeal to me (tony) too young, but doesn't stop me talking to them.
Never looked at punching above my weight, if they like me they like me if they don't it's there choice. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There no harm in just going for a chat and anything else is a bonus. girls in there 20's don't appeal to me (tony) too young, but doesn't stop me talking to them.
Never looked at punching above my weight, if they like me they like me if they don't it's there choice."
Absolutely agree. Never had this problem when I (mr h) was younger and nearly always had a positive response. Maybe it's just me getting older....or paranoia...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We used to think this , but not any longer . The folk we meet always seem to make us feel equal , no matter how gorgeous they are !
That's the joy of fab - we are all equally as fabulous and judgement rarely comes into it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Have to admit I never messaged anyone but I've been very lucky to meet some gorgeous men on this site, who have punched below their weight in my mind!!
The only time I messaged first was during the dare show your face thread and I'm extremely glad I did  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Have to admit I never messaged anyone but I've been very lucky to meet some gorgeous men on this site, who have punched below their weight in my mind!!
The only time I messaged first was during the dare show your face thread and I'm extremely glad I did "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Often do this, although im actually meeting someone tonight, for a social, that I would consider, out of my league.
Been messaging her for weeks, after I sent a brief message in response to her status, and found we get on well, so who knows.
It's sometimes a complete surprise who responds to a message, and who doesn't, you just never know, but if you can convey some of your personality and sense of humour early on, then hopefully the right people for you, will message back. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im sure its happened to lots of people on here down through the years. You walk into a bar/club and see someone and you think whoooarr....but you won't approach them because you think you wouldn't stand a chance.
Have you ever looked at a profile and just passed it by, for the only reason that you think you'd be punching above your weight...?"
yeah all the time lol
I get loads of messages from guys who are drop dead gorgeous but I don't reply because I think theres no way they will like me  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im sure its happened to lots of people on here down through the years. You walk into a bar/club and see someone and you think whoooarr....but you won't approach them because you think you wouldn't stand a chance.
Have you ever looked at a profile and just passed it by, for the only reason that you think you'd be punching above your weight...?"
Often... Sounds morbid doesn't it.
Then again I have pulled a few girls on a night out and I've thought how the hell did I manage that?! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've just met someone who I thought was out of my league. In fact we only traded banter for several months. Then the ice caps started to thaw and before you know it things were developing nicely.
Give people a chance. Maybe not everyone is as shallow and image obsessed as I am. So glad they aren't. |
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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago
Retirement Village |
"Im sure its happened to lots of people on here down through the years. You walk into a bar/club and see someone and you think whoooarr....but you won't approach them because you think you wouldn't stand a chance.
Have you ever looked at a profile and just passed it by, for the only reason that you think you'd be punching above your weight...?"
Simple answer...yes  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I often pass fitties by. I suppose I'm not naturally self confident. Who want to shag a bald, asthamatic, speccy lol
Having said that I more often pass by people with loads of veris even if they are drop dead gorgeous as I think I feel a bit intimidated. |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I've just met someone who I thought was out of my league. In fact we only traded banter for several months. Then the ice caps started to thaw and before you know it things were developing nicely.
Give people a chance. Maybe not everyone is as shallow and image obsessed as I am. So glad they aren't. "
Your penultimate sentence says it all.
The out of my league thing would apply in my head if I thought they were intellectually beyond me and I couldn't keep up my end of the conversation.
Looks fade, bodies sag so I would hate to think someone just chose me as I look low enough on this imaginary league table to be low hung fruit. Mixing my metaphors, I know. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im sure its happened to lots of people on here down through the years. You walk into a bar/club and see someone and you think whoooarr....but you won't approach them because you think you wouldn't stand a chance.
Have you ever looked at a profile and just passed it by, for the only reason that you think you'd be punching above your weight...?i
yeah all the time lol
I get loads of messages from guys who are drop dead gorgeous but I don't reply because I think theres no way they will like me "
So maybe that's why so many people don't reply to my messages! Lol
(I don't think!). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Having said that I also pass by people with slit, whore, etc in their names. Adding it all together with being an ugly bastard means my pool of likely meets is drier than a nuns knickers |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Having said that I also pass by people with slit, whore, etc in their names. Adding it all together with being an ugly bastard means my pool of likely meets is drier than a nuns knickers "
So lets get this right......you're a bald, asmathic, specky rugby player.....surely no such thing... |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
Be fibbing if I said we had never passed a profile by as we both thought they wouldn't be interested in us.
We used to always wait and see who contacted us.
But after meeting a couple at a party that we had lusted after for ages tell us that they had wanted to mail us for ages but didn't think we would be interested. Realised we were being a bit silly...
Now we are a bit braver and have thicker skin |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You may as well message and try ya luck as messaging people on fab aint person and its easy just to type a few words together and send, meeting in real takes more courage and hell yeah im defo up for that challenge, all I am on here is a profile a few pics and words but in real in confident in many ways and have a great fun personality to go with it, would chat to anyone as thats the person I am, on fab its very double standard at times, you just gave to have the right tools in certain cases, a bottomless wallet, an extremly hot other half, a monster cock, a pulse or be a single female and if your bi then thing dont get any better be it hot or not |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In bars I certainly do refrain from approaching chicks out my league. On fab I message all the fitties lol. In person, rejection is lot harder to take. "
A long time a go I noticed that hot women often end up going home alone as nobody dared approach them. Since then I have never considered anyone to good or not good enough until after we have spoken. |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"In bars I certainly do refrain from approaching chicks out my league. On fab I message all the fitties lol. In person, rejection is lot harder to take.
A long time a go I noticed that hot women often end up going home alone as nobody dared approach them. Since then I have never considered anyone to good or not good enough until after we have spoken. "
Phew! That's why I always ended up going home alone - I'm HOT! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I sometimes do see profiles that make me go 'Wow!', and will typically message them so long as I'm not blocked by the single male filter - however, with the days, then weeks typically rolling by with my message remaining yellow and unread, with no sign of them viewing my profile either, I've no idea whether or not they'd have felt the same attraction toward me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i have had messages from what i would call good looking men who i can imagine have very attractive wives, and much younger good looking men too.
at first i wasnt sure about meeting them because they were so good looking but they were keen so i did and i got on with them ok.
i dont worry about it now, its nice to be good looking but looks arent the be all and end all. |
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By *opinovMan
over a year ago
Point Nemo, Cumbria |
When I see a woman whom I think is attractive and then look at her profile more closely, I'm invariably struck by its outpouring of rudeness and arrogance - or impenetrable pigeon text speak or passages of patronizing block capitols terminated by exclamation marks. So I move on because any message I send her will probably be met with the same tone, or deletion.
When I do eventually chance upon an attractive profile that is actually readable and then go to all the effort of saying hello and introducing myself in a manner that suits how she presents herself, again, my message is usually deleted without even being opened and read.
I'm still waiting to be proved wrong and that I'm in anyone's league at all. I don't suppose I'm the only one in this boat - and it's little wonder that guys become hesitant to make contact. The end result is that I'm beginning to feel as though it's not really worth messaging anyone here any more, attractive or not - which is a pity.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I never used to try to even talk to beautiful women, I'm not totally ugly but know I'm no model either.
Luckily for me, recently, I've been lucky enough to meet some absolutely gorgeous women on here, some socially, and some for more. So sometimes its worth "punching above your weight". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On a night out I'm always being told I'm punching above my weight by my friends. I'm no model, but my confidence usually gets me a phone number or a "over night stay"
i find it harder on fab to get a conversation going then real life because once the message is deleted you cant really send another without looking like a stalker |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes. But thankfully I plucked up the courage to contact her. We have now been together for 2 1/2 years!  "
That's very sweet xxxxx sounds like you really like each other too x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Never ever think like that ... if I like I like , lol up to them if thay like me or not. "
That's very confident, good for you!
I'm afraid I do look at profiles and think nah, they aren't for us lol. Usually couples in their early 20's. I find it very hard to understand why we would be interesting to them, so we politely decline.
Yes Ive also had some great looking guys, and thought youd never look twice at me on the street. Its a burden I bear though to make them happy.
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By *andWCouple
over a year ago
Pontypridd |
I look at plenty of profiles and think they wouldn't be interested because they look too hot, Mr B on the other hand does not think like this, and thinks I shouldn't because unless we speak to them we would never know.
So luckily we have had some greats meets and made some good friends that left to me we wouldn't have had x |
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By *imjohnCouple
over a year ago
Clacton on sea, Essex |
"Im sure its happened to lots of people on here down through the years. You walk into a bar/club and see someone and you think whoooarr....but you won't approach them because you think you wouldn't stand a chance.
Have you ever looked at a profile and just passed it by, for the only reason that you think you'd be punching above your weight...?"
Yes... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We used to meet a single guy on here who was gorgeous. Tall, good looking and a lot younger than us, but he had no self confindence at all. That was the only thing lacking or he could have had his pick of anyone I'm sure. When he first contacted us I never thought he'd meet us but we went on to have several great meets with him. He's not on here now, so hopefully he's met a "special someone" to share his life with. |
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I spent my entire "yoof" doing exactly this. Actually, most of my adult life. I still do it and cant help it, although I do find being online makes it much easier. Face to face rejection is never nice, but somehow the disconnection of an internet connection makes it much easier to take.
*Him* |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im sure its happened to lots of people on here down through the years. You walk into a bar/club and see someone and you think whoooarr....but you won't approach them because you think you wouldn't stand a chance.
Have you ever looked at a profile and just passed it by, for the only reason that you think you'd be punching above your weight...?"
I never message first for this reason plus sometimes when I get a message I think are they just taking the micky |
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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago
Retirement Village |
"Im sure its happened to lots of people on here down through the years. You walk into a bar/club and see someone and you think whoooarr....but you won't approach them because you think you wouldn't stand a chance.
Have you ever looked at a profile and just passed it by, for the only reason that you think you'd be punching above your weight...?
I never message first for this reason plus sometimes when I get a message I think are they just taking the micky "
Seeing you profile that is definately not the case |
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i wait 2 b messaged xx
