FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Im just asking if..........
Im just asking if..........
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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any guys on here ever just want a social coffee or two and a chat to see if you and the female got on well enough to arrange a future meet? Serious question, not a pisstake.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Plenty of them! This is always how I arrange to meet a guy for the first time."
Same here! If they can't be civilised enough to meet for a coffee then I don't want to know.
The politest blokes have always been the most fun for me.  |
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By *livia_KWoman
over a year ago
South London |
"Plenty of them! This is always how I arrange to meet a guy for the first time.
Same here! If they can't be civilised enough to meet for a coffee then I don't want to know.
The politest blokes have always been the most fun for me. "
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By *els_BellsWoman
over a year ago
with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc |
"Plenty of them! This is always how I arrange to meet a guy for the first time.
Same here! If they can't be civilised enough to meet for a coffee then I don't want to know.
The politest blokes have always been the most fun for me.
"
What they said |
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"Plenty of them! This is always how I arrange to meet a guy for the first time.
Same here! If they can't be civilised enough to meet for a coffee then I don't want to know.
The politest blokes have always been the most fun for me.
What they said"
Me three! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Plenty of them! This is always how I arrange to meet a guy for the first time."
Me too and it's always a good sign to see whether they will turn up for actual antics in or out of the bedroom |
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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago
Retirement Village |
"any guys on here ever just want a social coffee or two and a chat to see if you and the female got on well enough to arrange a future meet? Serious question, not a pisstake. "
Yes some of us do 
This is just my preference but i like a social no-pressure meet to see if we get on in person. Pictures on here don't always tell you what a guy/girl are like in person and seeing someone face to face is a better way to make a choice. If you decide to play on the first meet then that's between those involved.
Not sure if my way works on this site as to some it is just a shag site and thats all some people want |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thanks for all your helpful lovely replies. I want this too what you all have said. Im obviously doing something wrong because ive posted 2 socials recently and nothing for the first one, todays one was a possible but he couldnt make it. I dont necessarily want to play on first meet because wouldnt be enough time |
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"Thanks for all your helpful lovely replies. I want this too what you all have said. Im obviously doing something wrong because ive posted 2 socials recently and nothing for the first one, todays one was a possible but he couldnt make it. I dont necessarily want to play on first meet because wouldnt be enough time "
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By *els_BellsWoman
over a year ago
with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc |
"Thanks for all your helpful lovely replies. I want this too what you all have said. Im obviously doing something wrong because ive posted 2 socials recently and nothing for the first one, todays one was a possible but he couldnt make it. I dont necessarily want to play on first meet because wouldnt be enough time "
You do what YOU want to do on a meet and never feel pressured if you just want a social meet.
Plenty of guys about who are up for a social first.
It was very rare of me to ever play with before a social as I like to feel comfortable and have never had a problem.
Good luck
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always meet for a coffee first, it tells a lot about their attitude. If I start get messages such as well you could give me a quick BJ just tell me that they would pressure me into doing things I don't want to do  |
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"any guys on here ever just want a social coffee or two and a chat to see if you and the female got on well enough to arrange a future meet? Serious question, not a pisstake. "
My meets all start this way. I've had several social meets before I've played as men need to feel comfortable with me.
I have four regulars I've been seeing for six years.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I personally prefer a social or two as it ensures that both parties get the opportunity to decide if they wish to take things further and to see if there is mutual sexual attraction. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I personally prefer a social or two as it ensures that both parties get the opportunity to decide if they wish to take things further and to see if there is mutual sexual attraction. "
This is what im after, but it seems that guys in my area dont want the same. Shame some of you arent down here  |
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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago
Retirement Village |
".... Shame some of you arent down here "
I'm relocating "sweetie" 
& i need to grow up by 3 years and 2 weeks
You stick to your principles of a meet and if guys can't respect that then it's their loss |
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I don't mind meeting for sex on a first meet but then I do have the benefit of being part of a couple so my fella is always there for security.. if I was a single woman then it would not enter my head to meet for sex on a first meet and if a fella could not understand that then I would happily move on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for all your helpful lovely replies. I want this too what you all have said. Im obviously doing something wrong because ive posted 2 socials recently and nothing for the first one, todays one was a possible but he couldnt make it. I dont necessarily want to play on first meet because wouldnt be enough time "
Do you mean you posted a meet request for a social? I personally wouldn't do it that way as I get the impression that meet requests are more for urgent sex needs. If that makes sense?!
I look for people I like then mail them and if we get on in a few mails I'll ask for a coffee meet (if they don't mention it first). I sometimes get turned down as some people just want the sex and no chat which is fine, I just don't meet them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would always prefer a social first. Even if a woman is smoking hot (I should be so lucky!) I'd like the chance to see if we click before we get down to anything. I think this happens pretty quick so if she insisted on throwing herself at me on a first meet, well it would be rude to refuse..but I always offer 'no obligation' first meets and I don't throw my teddy down if it just doesn't happen. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"any guys on here ever just want a social coffee or two and a chat to see if you and the female got on well enough to arrange a future meet? Serious question, not a pisstake. "
I actually would have the coffee meet to see if there was a chance of another coffee meet  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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ive rarely ever in 6yrs done social coffee meets..had a few drink social meetups, mainl;y because both of us couldnt accom at that particular time..
I'm afraid...I look at this way, doing whatever I do (its now work), my weekend is precious to me...if I have the chance of a shag or go for a coffee..
what is more likely? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Judging by the replies on here, most of you are happy to have a social first then go for a 2nd one. I dont post social meets as a desperate plea for sex - im happy just to get some new friends and if no sex is forthcoming I can live with that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I also always have coffee/lunch/dinner meets first.
Greedy bugger
But isn't that why we're all here? Cos we're greedy buggers?
I'm not greedy, I just have a healthy appetite. "
Coffe to break the ice, lunch to see how he eats and dinner if he can't do daytimes  |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Judging by the replies on here, most of you are happy to have a social first then go for a 2nd one. I dont post social meets as a desperate plea for sex - im happy just to get some new friends and if no sex is forthcoming I can live with that. "
Very very true - I have never shagged on first meet and I dont think i will in future. I wonder if male and female perceptions differ?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I met someone a bit on spur of the moment, which wont happen again. ate in front of me, never asked me if i wanted anything.  "
At their place or out and about? |
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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago
Retirement Village |
"Judging by the replies on here, most of you are happy to have a social first then go for a 2nd one. I dont post social meets as a desperate plea for sex - im happy just to get some new friends and if no sex is forthcoming I can live with that. "
Though i appreciate this post and it is what i'd look for the site is a sex site and some members just want the physical without the social aspect. I've been called 'weird' for my view of social first but i stick to it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Judging by the replies on here, most of you are happy to have a social first then go for a 2nd one. I dont post social meets as a desperate plea for sex - im happy just to get some new friends and if no sex is forthcoming I can live with that.
Though i appreciate this post and it is what i'd look for the site is a sex site and some members just want the physical without the social aspect. I've been called 'weird' for my view of social first but i stick to it."
Yes it is a sex site and ive had some good sex and ok shoot me down in flames i have had sex on a first meet but has included a drink or a coffee but I now dont want to do it that way anymore so I guess I can look forward to going without, which is fine, ill just stay here and chat |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I met someone a bit on spur of the moment, which wont happen again. ate in front of me, never asked me if i wanted anything.
At their place or out and about?"
their place |
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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago
Retirement Village |
"Judging by the replies on here, most of you are happy to have a social first then go for a 2nd one. I dont post social meets as a desperate plea for sex - im happy just to get some new friends and if no sex is forthcoming I can live with that.
Though i appreciate this post and it is what i'd look for the site is a sex site and some members just want the physical without the social aspect. I've been called 'weird' for my view of social first but i stick to it. Yes it is a sex site and ive had some good sex and ok shoot me down in flames i have had sex on a first meet but has included a drink or a coffee but I now dont want to do it that way anymore so I guess I can look forward to going without, which is fine, ill just stay here and chat "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always meet for a social/coffee first. That way I can see if the chemistry is there off screen as well as on.
Some ppl are good at putting on a persona/bravado on screen but totally different off. So a social meet always for me.. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I always meet for a social/coffee first. That way I can see if the chemistry is there off screen as well as on.
Some ppl are good at putting on a persona/bravado on screen but totally different off. So a social meet always for me.. "
Thank you. yes they do, then cancel with pathetic excuse. Im quite chatty with messages but a bit shy face to face but havent said no to the sex ever |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I always meet for a social/coffee first. That way I can see if the chemistry is there off screen as well as on.
Some ppl are good at putting on a persona/bravado on screen but totally different off. So a social meet always for me.. Thank you. yes they do, then cancel with pathetic excuse. Im quite chatty with messages but a bit shy face to face but havent said no to the sex ever "
I think my shortest meet todate was 10 mins lol... The guy was totally NOT the guy in the pics.. He claimed he was 5ft9 and slim build, what met me was a pot bellied balding guy shorter than me and I'm only 5ft2 haha... So definitely a social for me every time now! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I always meet for a social/coffee first. That way I can see if the chemistry is there off screen as well as on.
Some ppl are good at putting on a persona/bravado on screen but totally different off. So a social meet always for me.. Thank you. yes they do, then cancel with pathetic excuse. Im quite chatty with messages but a bit shy face to face but havent said no to the sex ever
I think my shortest meet todate was 10 mins lol... The guy was totally NOT the guy in the pics.. He claimed he was 5ft9 and slim build, what met me was a pot bellied balding guy shorter than me and I'm only 5ft2 haha... So definitely a social for me every time now! "
What a shock for you Im always honest and what you see is what you get, with a few extra stone now |
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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago
In Your Bush |
"I always meet for a social/coffee first. That way I can see if the chemistry is there off screen as well as on.
Some ppl are good at putting on a persona/bravado on screen but totally different off. So a social meet always for me.. Thank you. yes they do, then cancel with pathetic excuse. Im quite chatty with messages but a bit shy face to face but havent said no to the sex ever
I think my shortest meet todate was 10 mins lol... The guy was totally NOT the guy in the pics.. He claimed he was 5ft9 and slim build, what met me was a pot bellied balding guy shorter than me and I'm only 5ft2 haha... So definitely a social for me every time now! "
You promised not to say anything  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The last two people I've met were
1. In a pub waffling for 2 1/2 hours, quick snog and plans to meet up properly when we both get time
2. Cup of tea and an hour waffling followed by hot sex, dinner, sex, drink break, sex then drive home
Both of these were after loads of pm's and phone chats with no expectation to play- if it happens it happens, if it doesn't it doesn't |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"any guys on here ever just want a social coffee or two and a chat to see if you and the female got on well enough to arrange a future meet? Serious question, not a pisstake. "
In most situations its the preferred first move as it involves no commitment to playing or having to make excuses not to and so you well I am more relaxed and chilled out on first encounter. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"any guys on here ever just want a social coffee or two and a chat to see if you and the female got on well enough to arrange a future meet? Serious question, not a pisstake. "
Have had several meets with some lovely people off the site and everyone started with a social meet first off. some went no further as i think there has to be some attraction for it to go anyfurther |
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"any guys on here ever just want a social coffee or two and a chat to see if you and the female got on well enough to arrange a future meet? Serious question, not a pisstake. "
Was going to PM you...but I am blocked! I've scanned through the answers...so probably have missed the plot.
I just wondered why someone as young and as sexy as you are would feel the need to ask that question!! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The last two people I've met were
1. In a pub waffling for 2 1/2 hours, quick snog and plans to meet up properly when we both get time
2. Cup of tea and an hour waffling followed by hot sex, dinner, sex, drink break, sex then drive home
Both of these were after loads of pm's and phone chats with no expectation to play- if it happens it happens, if it doesn't it doesn't "
Lots of pm's sound good plus No. 1, but private snog preferably with someone local |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"any guys on here ever just want a social coffee or two and a chat to see if you and the female got on well enough to arrange a future meet? Serious question, not a pisstake.
Was going to PM you...but I am blocked! I've scanned through the answers...so probably have missed the plot.
I just wondered why someone as young and as sexy as you are would feel the need to ask that question!! "
Young, me? well thank you but im 50 later this year. Im asking the question because I felt that socials were persona non grata here but am being proved wrong |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The last two people I've met were
1. In a pub waffling for 2 1/2 hours, quick snog and plans to meet up properly when we both get time
2. Cup of tea and an hour waffling followed by hot sex, dinner, sex, drink break, sex then drive home
Both of these were after loads of pm's and phone chats with no expectation to play- if it happens it happens, if it doesn't it doesn't Lots of pm's sound good plus No. 1, but private snog preferably with someone local "
Lots of pm's allow me to filter out the people not serious about meeting and I'm usually 99% sure I'm going to like the person I'm meeting- making it social takes the pressure off both sides so if it goes no further you've lost nothing- if it does its a bonus |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"any guys on here ever just want a social coffee or two and a chat to see if you and the female got on well enough to arrange a future meet? Serious question, not a pisstake. "
i would for sure least if u have tht spark the sex when it happens will be better x |
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I don't do social meets. I spend weeks getting to know someone via pm and telephone until I'm 100percent sure. If there was a tiny niggle i wouldn't meet them. Only once I did a coffee meet, really nice guy nothing wrong with him but it took the edge of it |
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