 |
By *ugby 123 OP Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
We seem to have a spate of threads complaining about people who have blocked them, ignored their mails, rejected the offer of a meet etc etc.
Do you need a thick skin on here?
Do you have a thick skin?
Are you a move on type of person after rejection or does it get to you?
Is it sometimes just having a bad day yourself and it got to you?
Not asking for descriptions of why , just have you got a thick skin or do you let things get to you?
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Do you need thick skin to be able to accept a "no thanks"? 
The amount of "no thanks" I send out... I don't think I need thick skin to be able to accept I'll get one back once in a while... it's to be expected. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I don't think it's so much a thick skin in my case it's more about never expecting anyone to want to play with me, that's not something that gets me down in the slightest, just me being the realist I have always been.
10 years of swinging has shown me that many are happy to play with me but each time I cannot help but he flattered and surprised.
So yes in 10 years more have declined than accepted but that doesn't bother me in the slightest.
I know that many younger guys, fitter guys, better looking guys get turned down by some too, the day we all stop having personal preferences in everything we do is the day we get on the same level as animals. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We seem to have a spate of threads complaining about people who have blocked them, ignored their mails, rejected the offer of a meet etc etc.
Do you need a thick skin on here?
Do you have a thick skin?
Are you a move on type of person after rejection or does it get to you?
Is it sometimes just having a bad day yourself and it got to you?
Not asking for descriptions of why , just have you got a thick skin or do you let things get to you?
"
Always had a Rhino hide when playing ...but only on sites...at clubs I was very sensitive...to my own emotional health..and the feelings of others...hence my retirement...that degree of separation from "reality" is available via the internet...but its "real" and "raw" in the clubs...ouch..!!!...  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I've never contacted any one on site but have clicked on profiles of forumites and I've been blocked.
Have never given it a second thought to be honest. On to the next thread that catches my eye. I think some people take this a little too seriously  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ugby 123 OP Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"Do you need thick skin to be able to accept a "no thanks"?
The amount of "no thanks" I send out... I don't think I need thick skin to be able to accept I'll get one back once in a while... it's to be expected."
Was that your mindset as you decided to join sites like this? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ugby 123 OP Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"I don't think it's so much a thick skin in my case it's more about never expecting anyone to want to play with me, that's not something that gets me down in the slightest, just me being the realist I have always been.
10 years of swinging has shown me that many are happy to play with me but each time I cannot help but he flattered and surprised.
So yes in 10 years more have declined than accepted but that doesn't bother me in the slightest.
I know that many younger guys, fitter guys, better looking guys get turned down by some too, the day we all stop having personal preferences in everything we do is the day we get on the same level as animals."
I might change that too, I agree with your last sentance about preferences and no expectations.
Did you decide all this before you started playing or has your ideas changed through the time you have been swinging. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think we are just thick, not just thick skinned, lol. We heve been rejected by mail a couple of times, and suppose we are lucky in the fact that only a few couples haven't responded to us.
I like to think though, that our profile, although it must look a little daunting at first glance, it tells you a hell of a lot about us, and there is enough info there to enable "our prey", lol, to decide whether or not they want to meet us.
We have never had a rejection after a face to face meet, although we have had to say sorry but no thanks on a couple of occaisions, and both times it was because the people sent us, out of date photos. We update ours regularly, so we do look like our pics.
We try to be honest and upfront...it's saves lots of time and lessens the hurt in the longrun  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Do you need thick skin to be able to accept a "no thanks"?
The amount of "no thanks" I send out... I don't think I need thick skin to be able to accept I'll get one back once in a while... it's to be expected.
Was that your mindset as you decided to join sites like this?"
I guess it was... though I vaguely remember what I think was the first pm knock-back on the first site I was on and thinking "bastard!" for a split second and then thinking "yeah.... it had to happen sooner or later".
But I also remember when I first joined that site ... I didn't assume everyone would fancy everyone and thought it would be no different than going out on the pull in town... some you win some you lose.
I guess the split second thought of "bastard!" came from being spoilt for choice for a long period of time and being the one sending all of the "no thanks" messages; reality can sometimes fade into the background.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
if you can't take rejection in any form, you shouldnt be on here as you are going to put yourself thro pain..
it's supposed to be about fun.
and if anyone does take it all too seriously... it reflects a possible lack of perspective.
I have in the past... and have taken breaks and come back.. I try to reflect on my 'issues' apologise if needed and learn from things. People should start with themselves first, then and only then look at others.
so to answer your question a thick skin may be required but the ability to do self analysis is probably as important.
xxx
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *im53Man
over a year ago
Boldon |
i would think it`s harder for single ladies and cpls to handel rejections
as they get far less than single guys
we just come to expect them as the normal. thats if we get a reply,
but just get over it and on to the next one
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
As A married male on here I get used to rejections LoL Mind you I don't really send all that many e-mails to be honest.
Life is full of rejections as you get on you just learn to deal with it and move on.
Life is too short to worry about people who don't want to know you.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think we are just thick, not just thick skinned, lol. We heve been rejected by mail a couple of times, and suppose we are lucky in the fact that only a few couples haven't responded to us.
I like to think though, that our profile, although it must look a little daunting at first glance, it tells you a hell of a lot about us, and there is enough info there to enable "our prey", lol, to decide whether or not they want to meet us.
We have never had a rejection after a face to face meet, although we have had to say sorry but no thanks on a couple of occaisions, and both times it was because the people sent us, out of date photos. We update ours regularly, so we do look like our pics.
We try to be honest and upfront...it's saves lots of time and lessens the hurt in the longrun "
Rejection is linked directly to expectation. If you expect something and you dont get it, then human nature usually dictates that you feel down. On a previous post another member has suggested that couples and single fems find it harder to deal with, simply because they dont experience it enough, whereas most single guys, probably the ones who have been here a long time, are more or less bullet proof, entirely due to the fact that they deal with it daily.
You can cut down your chances of rejection by re-evaluating your expectaions, by more careful selection of playmates and by telling more in your online profile.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ugby 123 OP Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"Would anyone walk into a supermarket and seriously believe "Everyone in here wants me"?
Keep it real! "
It wasn't just rejection mails though I meant.
Being blocked, does that pee people off? even though you can block people yourselves.
lmao at Dale winton. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ugby 123 OP Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"What type of rejections hurts you more though?
If people don't like your pics, or if they decide you're not for them after a face to face meet?  "
I would rather have the first if I am honest. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
the amount a shit u get on here
u need thick skin..ive been blocked
by ppl ive had no dealings with
but cause friends of mine has i
get blocked for it but hey ho
i love my friends an that wont
change for anything so block away lol |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Being blocked, does that pee people off? even though you can block people yourselves.
"
nope, I mentioned on another thread that people who block you should be thanked.Every second/minute of your life is precious so why waste time that you will never get back on them..
You may not be what they are looking for or they have possible taken exception to something you may have said in chat or forums.
if you discover you are blocked.... laugh... so much better than sticking the finger up.. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Rejection doesn't bother us at all, we all like different things, I think I was amused a bit ago to see I had been blocked by someone who we had had no contact with at all, wouldn't be interested in meeting them for a multitude of reasons - didn't need a thick skin as it made me laugh!!! Z |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What type of rejections hurts you more though?
If people don't like your pics, or if they decide you're not for them after a face to face meet?
I would rather have the first if I am honest."
Me too, if I'm honest, but probably because I think, "well they like the look of us, so we're almost there". It is always more painful to fall at the last hurdle |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Not sure if you need a thick skin to enjoy this site but what you definitely need is a healthy grip on reality and to set your expectations accordingly.
Virtually every one of the examples the OP lists crops up on here on a weekly basis and if we were all brutally honest it's the thread originators who have simply not grasped the mechanics of this site.
The site is a total cross section of society, you get into your car each day to drive from a to b fully aware that along the way someone is quite likely to over take you, cut you up, drive slower than you, get in your way blah blah blah so why should anyone expect anything different in here?
Single women and couples regularly complain about unwanted emails. For us, like cold calling and junk mail it simply comes with the territory, we reply/delete and move on. Nothing very difficult with that.
Single guys complain about not getting replies. No matter how many times you use the junk mail analogy, point out there is nothing in the rules they still complain. No reply has nothing to do with rudeness it's simply someones way of saying "you are not my cup of tea" IE rejection, and some folk on here sadly do not do rejection very well.
Blocking is a site facility open to use by one and all and is nothing more sinister than that. It's part of the rejection process and again those who start threads wittering on about being blocked are folk who do not react well to rejection. We only have a handful of verifications and one of those currently has us blocked, no idea why but the only reaction it gets from us is a wry smile.
Single guys complain about not getting meets, in general it's guys in their mid 40's and up as well as youngsters.
To enjoy this site you need nothing more than a firm grip on reality and the maturity to look at yourself and set your goals realistically.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Being blocked, does that pee people off? even though you can block people yourselves.
nope, I mentioned on another thread that people who block you should be thanked.Every second/minute of your life is precious so why waste time that you will never get back on them..
You may not be what they are looking for or they have possible taken exception to something you may have said in chat or forums.
if you discover you are blocked.... laugh... so much better than sticking the finger up.."
thats quite a philosofical way of looking at it, and good on ya |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ickmealloverWoman
over a year ago
a very plush appartment off junt 7 M5 |
I have mentioned on the forums before that I think its rather indiscrete, don't they think the very people they may well be complaining about might actually read the forums
Or maybe thats the point, they need to hit out
I've no idea
I know as a much older, gobby, fat bird who is not the best looking lady god gave breath too, I am not everyones cup of tea so I suppose I expect to rejected a lot of the time and no one is more surprised than me when I am not!
So I aguess I would say I am used to it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Ach i just shrug my shoulders and say what the heck, nothing lost nothing gained and no point in losing sleep over rejection.
I would hate to be one of those folk who take things badly and gets offended too easily, fuck that, life's too short and all that malarky.
Must be the Taurus in me, very laid back and doesn't give a shite
  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Virtually every one of the examples the OP lists crops up on here on a weekly basis and if we were all brutally honest it's the thread originators who have simply not grasped the mechanics of this site."
Was thinking about this on another rather heated thread, which you may or may not have been involved in....
...but seeing as there are so many who don't grasp the fundamentals, or have to high expectations. Perhaps it's on us to find a good way of getting through to them?
Sticky threads on these topics, so they can easily be found and seen, has been suggested before but never come to fruition.
Maybe we should write a little piece that everyone has to read before signing up, with a little test at the end to make sure they have understood? lol |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Not sure if you need a thick skin to enjoy this site but what you definitely need is a healthy grip on reality and to set your expectations accordingly.
Virtually every one of the examples the OP lists crops up on here on a weekly basis and if we were all brutally honest it's the thread originators who have simply not grasped the mechanics of this site.
The site is a total cross section of society, you get into your car each day to drive from a to b fully aware that along the way someone is quite likely to over take you, cut you up, drive slower than you, get in your way blah blah blah so why should anyone expect anything different in here?
Single women and couples regularly complain about unwanted emails. For us, like cold calling and junk mail it simply comes with the territory, we reply/delete and move on. Nothing very difficult with that.
Single guys complain about not getting replies. No matter how many times you use the junk mail analogy, point out there is nothing in the rules they still complain. No reply has nothing to do with rudeness it's simply someones way of saying "you are not my cup of tea" IE rejection, and some folk on here sadly do not do rejection very well.
Blocking is a site facility open to use by one and all and is nothing more sinister than that. It's part of the rejection process and again those who start threads wittering on about being blocked are folk who do not react well to rejection. We only have a handful of verifications and one of those currently has us blocked, no idea why but the only reaction it gets from us is a wry smile.
Single guys complain about not getting meets, in general it's guys in their mid 40's and up as well as youngsters.
To enjoy this site you need nothing more than a firm grip on reality and the maturity to look at yourself and set your goals realistically.
"
Very well put! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
*** WARNING BAD JOKE ALERT ***
I never really believed in all this star sign stuff, then a mate of mine told me he went on a meet with a woman that was heavily into the star sign thing, she also couldn't spell very well and assumed in her profile it was a typo, but when he met her it was accurate,
She was a
.
.
.
Saggytittyarse
I'll get me coat  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I have learnt that you have to have a thick skin on here espeecially being a single guy,and a lot of messages are just deleted,
But must admit is very nice when you get one saying sorry your not what we looking for,I always send a thank you for the reply,
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ugby 123 OP Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"Virtually every one of the examples the OP lists crops up on here on a weekly basis and if we were all brutally honest it's the thread originators who have simply not grasped the mechanics of this site.
Was thinking about this on another rather heated thread, which you may or may not have been involved in....
...but seeing as there are so many who don't grasp the fundamentals, or have to high expectations. Perhaps it's on us to find a good way of getting through to them?
Sticky threads on these topics, so they can easily be found and seen, has been suggested before but never come to fruition.
Maybe we should write a little piece that everyone has to read before signing up, with a little test at the end to make sure they have understood? lol"
I would say 2bonks post was spot on, especially the first sentance.
The question for me though was, did you have this mindset of " I might be rejected at some point and I will take it on the chin" or did it come after you started using sites like these. Not so much a question of should we tell other people how it is done |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Virtually every one of the examples the OP lists crops up on here on a weekly basis and if we were all brutally honest it's the thread originators who have simply not grasped the mechanics of this site.
Was thinking about this on another rather heated thread, which you may or may not have been involved in....
...but seeing as there are so many who don't grasp the fundamentals, or have to high expectations. Perhaps it's on us to find a good way of getting through to them?
Sticky threads on these topics, so they can easily be found and seen, has been suggested before but never come to fruition.
Maybe we should write a little piece that everyone has to read before signing up, with a little test at the end to make sure they have understood? lol"
I suspect that even if written with multi coloured crayons with pictures, diagrams, in depth explanations and access to a 24 hours "Samaritan" style hotline manned by Rugby or HPC some folk would still not "get it" |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"*** WARNING BAD JOKE ALERT ***
I never really believed in all this star sign stuff, then a mate of mine told me he went on a meet with a woman that was heavily into the star sign thing, she also couldn't spell very well and assumed in her profile it was a typo, but when he met her it was accurate,
She was a
.
.
.
Saggytittyarse
I'll get me coat "
Boom Boom
Taxi mate......toot toot, off yie go |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"*** WARNING BAD JOKE ALERT ***
I never really believed in all this star sign stuff, then a mate of mine told me he went on a meet with a woman that was heavily into the star sign thing, she also couldn't spell very well and assumed in her profile it was a typo, but when he met her it was accurate,
She was a
.
.
.
Saggytittyarse
I'll get me coat
Boom Boom
Taxi mate......toot toot, off yie go "
Bet he still shagged her |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Do you think it could be about expectation? I mean, do people assume that because it's a swinging site everyone you would like to meet must equally be as eager to meet you and for some a deleted message, being blocked is totally unexpected.
In the "real" world we face rejection in all it's guises - not chosen for a job, not singled out for praise, ignored in social settings etc - I don't think many would create "outside" as they do on sites like this.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I would say 2bonks post was spot on, especially the first sentance.
The question for me though was, did you have this mindset of " I might be rejected at some point and I will take it on the chin" or did it come after you started using sites like these. Not so much a question of should we tell other people how it is done "
I realise I detracted from your original question... and didn't answer it myself
Just with so much going on in this forum about repeated threads, not getting replies etc etc isn't it time we found a solution instead of pointing out the problem over and over?
...and I agree 2bonks was right, people need a better grip on reality, but many clearly never find this.
If you want to know my answer, well I guess I must have expected some rejection, I don't rate myself that highly.... but I definitely didn't expect it to be how it was. I'm certain I made many of the common mistakes at first. So it must have come to me having used the site. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ugby 123 OP Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"I would say 2bonks post was spot on, especially the first sentance.
The question for me though was, did you have this mindset of " I might be rejected at some point and I will take it on the chin" or did it come after you started using sites like these. Not so much a question of should we tell other people how it is done
I realise I detracted from your original question... and didn't answer it myself
Just with so much going on in this forum about repeated threads, not getting replies etc etc isn't it time we found a solution instead of pointing out the problem over and over?
...and I agree 2bonks was right, people need a better grip on reality, but many clearly never find this.
If you want to know my answer, well I guess I must have expected some rejection, I don't rate myself that highly.... but I definitely didn't expect it to be how it was. I'm certain I made many of the common mistakes at first. So it must have come to me having used the site."
I don't really want this to go to another subject but will just answer you on one point.
There will never really be a solution of repeated threads ( unless Admin say otherwise) as there won't ever be a definitive answer to any one question. We are all different in what we think and what we will answer, PLUS even if you answered one thing last year, your opinion might have changed since then.
Anyway, yes I did want to know your answer and thanks
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ugby 123 OP Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"Virtually every one of the examples the OP lists crops up on here on a weekly basis and if we were all brutally honest it's the thread originators who have simply not grasped the mechanics of this site.
Was thinking about this on another rather heated thread, which you may or may not have been involved in....
...but seeing as there are so many who don't grasp the fundamentals, or have to high expectations. Perhaps it's on us to find a good way of getting through to them?
Sticky threads on these topics, so they can easily be found and seen, has been suggested before but never come to fruition.
Maybe we should write a little piece that everyone has to read before signing up, with a little test at the end to make sure they have understood? lol
I suspect that even if written with multi coloured crayons with pictures, diagrams, in depth explanations and access to a 24 hours "Samaritan" style hotline manned by Rugby or HPC some folk would still not "get it" "
Ah, someone who does get it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I THINK its because a percentage of people are on here for the wrong reasons and the community of swingers is smaller than people think... 'sex with others as an add on to an existing very fulfilling sexual relationship for the couples, for the singles no strings sex with couples looking for a third person to join for sexual pleasure for all 3 or 121 sex with other singles for fun rather than romance'.
2bonks has always struck me as a 'swinging couple ' mr 2bonks has always spoken abouts mrs2bonk with amazing respect and excitement about her sexual pleasure being equal to his.
in many more cases it comes across one sided, or looking for romance in the single community or a quick leg over from others..
and from the insecurity comes the sensitivity.. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ugby 123 OP Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
""and from the insecurity comes the sensitivity.."
Aw, bless!"
Nothing wrong with sensitivity, although I don't think you would last long on sites like this if you are too sensitive. View made a good point though. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I THINK its because a percentage of people are on here for the wrong reasons and the community of swingers is smaller than people think... 'sex with others as an add on to an existing very fulfilling sexual relationship for the couples, for the singles no strings sex with couples looking for a third person to join for sexual pleasure for all 3 or 121 sex with other singles for fun rather than romance'.
2bonks has always struck me as a 'swinging couple ' mr 2bonks has always spoken abouts mrs2bonk with amazing respect and excitement about her sexual pleasure being equal to his.
in many more cases it comes across one sided, or looking for romance in the single community or a quick leg over from others..
and from the insecurity comes the sensitivity.."
There is also that minority of singles who stress over and over they are not looking for a relationship, wish no strings sex etc. but DO use this site as a dating site. Or like the couple that wants other couples to remain exclusively their play mates.
They suffer severe disappointment when their favourite swing partner couples etc are still meeting new people and they are not.
They see that as a form of rejection in itself. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
This must be a record, a serious thread in the lounge that has so far stayed on message
View,
Thank you for those very kind words and what you say really does sum it up for me.
As much as I really do enjoy this site the experiences of many on here bear very little resemblance to the swinging world we have enjoyed over the last 9 years.
For us it is simple uncomplicated fun that we both enjoy with other like minded folk. We have met some wonderful people had some great fun, some average fun and the odd disappointment but we have never read anything more into than "it was us all having fun"
We go out together, we play together and we come home together. Everything about this way of life is done together and for the life of me I cannot understand how some folk can make such a performance out of something so bloody simple |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think as an ex fem bi 'swingle' on here I was one of the lucky ones. The only time I was blocked that I knew of was by a guy who I played with once with another couple and when I wouldn't agree not to see this couple again alone he blocked me lol, just made me smile and in no way upset me.
Now I'm part of a couple that are not playing at the moment again we have not really had any experience of being blocked that I know of, apart from one couple who I've never had contact with and only know we've been blocked because I do tend to check out profiles of posters before I reply sometimes.
This hasn't upset me or worried me only purely made me curious as to why ??
So don't really know if I have a thick skin or not, just know that all my experiences on here have been bloody marvellous, love this site, love the people on it - found something I didn't know I was looking for and certainly never imagined I would find it here, and am still enjoying the company and friendship even though for the time being we aren't actively 'swinging'.
My philosophy on here is go with the flow, if it feels good do it, if it doesn't be as kind and thoughtful as you can - be with others as you would want them to be with you. Manners cost nothing.
xxx Raz xxx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
im scared mr bonks actually made sense!!! !!
joking aside there are a few good points made in the post!
sometimes people let too many emotions get tangled in with what is a fun hobby and it leads to destruction or rejection that they just cant seem to handle many learn from it many dont! as laine said sometimes people get the nature of the site mixed up and become hostile when things dont work out the way they expect them to or when people dont meet thier expectations or do what they want!xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
No, I wouldn't say that we're thick skinned, but at the end of the day this is a virtual world, characters on a screen typed by people, 99.5% whom we most probably will never encounter in our lives so we sure ain't gona get ourselves breaking into a sweat over what someone has or hasn't done or said.
The PC has an 'off' button ......
So if people:
Ignore us,
Call us,
Hate the very sight or sound of us,
Will we lose a seconds sleep over it ?
Errrrm no, in fact to be honest we couldn't give a flying f*ck what people do or think - we have each other and in the great scheme of things, that's all that matters in the whole wide world |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I THINK its because a percentage of people are on here for the wrong reasons and the community of swingers is smaller than people think... 'sex with others as an add on to an existing very fulfilling sexual relationship for the couples, for the singles no strings sex with couples looking for a third person to join for sexual pleasure for all 3 or 121 sex with other singles for fun rather than romance'.
2bonks has always struck me as a 'swinging couple ' mr 2bonks has always spoken abouts mrs2bonk with amazing respect and excitement about her sexual pleasure being equal to his.
in many more cases it comes across one sided, or looking for romance in the single community or a quick leg over from others..
and from the insecurity comes the sensitivity.."
Have to agree with this perspective...the community of "swingers" is getting smaller...and maybe this is inevitable...as the scene changes and evolves...or some would argue "Devolves"....guys wanting n.s.a..shags...single fems..wanting the same...I prefer the old style "Wife swapping days"...but I'm an old fart... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"This must be a record, a serious thread in the lounge that has so far stayed on message
View,
Thank you for those very kind words and what you say really does sum it up for me.
As much as I really do enjoy this site the experiences of many on here bear very little resemblance to the swinging world we have enjoyed over the last 9 years.
For us it is simple uncomplicated fun that we both enjoy with other like minded folk. We have met some wonderful people had some great fun, some average fun and the odd disappointment but we have never read anything more into than "it was us all having fun"
We go out together, we play together and we come home together. Everything about this way of life is done together and for the life of me I cannot understand how some folk can make such a performance out of something so bloody simple"
Absolutely spot on, well said!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
