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"Swinger" Friendly Pubs?!?!
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" so is it small mindedness or folk being realistic "Imo and i stress IMO, it is small mindedness, our pub is a small out of town, mens drinking pub in barnsley, and one who know barnsley will know how "stuck in there ways" they can be. (i stress CAN be and fully aware not all are like this) More so for our regulars as alot of them are older men, from the old mining community. They simply dont like change. When we decided to hold our own socials, we where u front and honest with them all. Questions where asked, in fact questions are still asked and they get honest answers. We have lost no regulars since we started our socials, in fact some use the pub more on weekends now, simply to have a nosey lol As the saying goes Honesty is the best policy. | |||
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"lol I'm a biker i belong to a biker club, and like swingers theres a stigma that runs with us,,,, ooh look at them bikers in their leathers and those noisey bikes they ride. lets face it it's a life style, same as swinging, and yes we have trouble finding bike friendly pub's too, and all we want to do is have a drink and sit and talk and an evening out with like minded people, same as swinger's. End of day if the landlord/landlady is biker/swinger friendly you have a pub that tolerates biker/swinger's and the local/regular usually mix fairly well too "Pity your not closer touv, kevs a biker, we could have a swinging bikers pub lol | |||
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"Love your pub, and I am waiting to hear when you are having the Jun 10 social so that I can book my day off! "June 10th 2010...Duh! | |||
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"Kev, Was not having a dig in any shape or form, " Didnt think you where having a go hun appreciate its your opinion, and its kat btw, kev off playing pool, skiving as usual lol (hope he dont read that lol) I do understand what you are saying, but i think people underestimate vanilla people, and yes i can here you all cry "in an ideal world" lol Honesty worked for us, and im sure it could work for alot more. | |||
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"Love your pub, and I am waiting to hear when you are having the Jun 10 social so that I can book my day off!
June 10th 2010...Duh! ". Noooooo, date has not been set, I meant Jun (20) 10, duh!!!  | |||
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"Love your pub, and I am waiting to hear when you are having the Jun 10 social so that I can book my day off!
June 10th 2010...Duh!
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Noooooo, date has not been set, I meant Jun (20) 10, duh!!! "Im going to sort dates for all socials this year hun, once i know what weekends is at home as i dont have socials when shes as home. | |||
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"Kev, Was not having a dig in any shape or form, Didnt think you where having a go hun appreciate its your opinion, and its kat btw, kev off playing pool, skiving as usual lol (hope he dont read that lol) I do understand what you are saying, but i think people underestimate vanilla people, and yes i can here you all cry "in an ideal world" lol Honesty worked for us, and im sure it could work for alot more." Kat, Apologies for assuming it was your other half and based on some of the comments on here sounds like you guys have really got it squared away there. Well done to you both and if we ever find ourselves in that part of the world we will drop in and say hi | |||
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"Love your pub, and I am waiting to hear when you are having the Jun 10 social so that I can book my day off!
June 10th 2010...Duh!
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Noooooo, date has not been set, I meant Jun (20) 10, duh!!! "Dont you flippin Duh! Me...Oh you did.. | |||
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"lol I'm a biker i belong to a biker club, and like swingers theres a stigma that runs with us,,,, ooh look at them bikers in their leathers and those noisey bikes they ride. lets face it it's a life style, same as swinging, and yes we have trouble finding bike friendly pub's too, and all we want to do is have a drink and sit and talk and an evening out with like minded people, same as swinger's. End of day if the landlord/landlady is biker/swinger friendly you have a pub that tolerates biker/swinger's and the local/regular usually mix fairly well too
Pity your not closer touv, kevs a biker, we could have a swinging bikers pub lol"sounds a cool idea lol if you ever think of relocating then i know of a great pub going begging here abouts lol and it has laods of rooms upstairs too wooooohoooo | |||
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"but don't forget there are people out there who think our way of life is depraved...." Just the same in the hotel industry, many years ago Kid, myself and our dog booked into a hotel for a weekend break, we selected this hotel as they claimed to be pet friendly, after checking in and unpacking, knock knock on our room door, the owner of the establishment stated "We don't allow you kind of people here, please leave" When I asked him to explain "You kind of people" it was very clear what his referral was leading to, as requested, we left the "Family" run establishment, point being, bigotry exists in many forms. | |||
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"My opinion is this Swingers pubs are fine if thats all they do regular pubs are fine if thats all they do I know it would bother me if it tried to cater for everyone You have to know your niche market I guess I'm trying to say I would go to a swingers pub if it were aimed at swingers only But not a regular pub that was swinger friendly, to be gawped at and pondered over by non swingers this is why I choose to go to a swingers club, no uncomfortable conversations or starring as tho I am living in a goldfish bowl But I think your lucky if you can pull it off " I can see your point, and admit when swingers started to use the pub on a weekend our regulars did come in to have a nosey, the good thing about our pub is is we have a bar area what the regulars use and a separate lounge area that the swingers use. After a few weeks the novelty wore off and now both sides do get along, the regulars have realised we are all just normal everyday people and accept this. | |||
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"My opinion is this Swingers pubs are fine if thats all they do regular pubs are fine if thats all they do I know it would bother me if it tried to cater for everyone You have to know your niche market I guess I'm trying to say I would go to a swingers pub if it were aimed at swingers only But not a regular pub that was swinger friendly, to be gawped at and pondered over by non swingers this is why I choose to go to a swingers club, no uncomfortable conversations or starring as tho I am living in a goldfish bowl But I think your lucky if you can pull it off I can see your point, and admit when swingers started to use the pub on a weekend our regulars did come in to have a nosey, the good thing about our pub is is we have a bar area what the regulars use and a separate lounge area that the swingers use. After a few weeks the novelty wore off and now both sides do get along, the regulars have realised we are all just normal everyday people and accept this." Well I see that totally and fair play to you but I would be a little concerned about people who are not regulars tho And what about some partners who dont wish their partners to hang around with a bunch or sex mad loonies like me? | |||
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Kev and Kat obviously didn't undertake opening their pub up to the likes of us swingers lightly, but from what I've seen it works well. In the current climate any savvy business owners are going to do what they think is best for their business and if that means welcoming a certain type of person be it bikers, swingers, the WI or the local stamp collectors club so be it.
I don't think it would be successful in every pub, but given the Rose and Crown's location and layout it does work well. Regulars in one side, us lot in the other. I've known the regs to stray over and vise versa but everyone respects everyone else.
As for comments like
"I would be a little concerned about people who are not regulars tho" That implies we're either giving blow jobs under the table or we're stupid - neither of which applies to most of us 
We've been in on a few occasions where non regulars have been in the lounge and been blissfully unaware of what we do in our private lives in the same way we've no idea what they get up to.
We're just a group of like minded people that drink in the same pub as each other, we're not shagging over the bar!!
Kitten x | |||
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"We frequent the Rose and Crown quite often not just on social nights so have a rough idea of what goes on
Kev and Kat obviously didn't undertake opening their pub up to the likes of us swingers lightly, but from what I've seen it works well. In the current climate any savvy business owners are going to do what they think is best for their business and if that means welcoming a certain type of person be it bikers, swingers, the WI or the local stamp collectors club so be it.
I don't think it would be successful in every pub, but given the Rose and Crown's location and layout it does work well. Regulars in one side, us lot in the other. I've known the regs to stray over and vise versa but everyone respects everyone else.
As for comments like
I would be a little concerned about people who are not regulars tho
That implies we're either giving blow jobs under the table or we're stupid - neither of which applies to most of us
We've been in on a few occasions where non regulars have been in the lounge and been blissfully unaware of what we do in our private lives in the same way we've no idea what they get up to.
We're just a group of like minded people that drink in the same pub as each other, we're not shagging over the bar!!
Kitten x "Um I do KNOW that Its no different than a darts night I guess But I would be happier not being tonights circus act Its just my view tho, thankfully others won't feel the same
besides which
I did used to otganise socials in birmingham where we would go bowling, drinking, eating etc in various venue's and I often fely uncomfortable if the conversation got too loud and folk became aware of our activities
But we cant all feel the same
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"We frequent the Rose and Crown quite often not just on social nights so have a rough idea of what goes on
Kev and Kat obviously didn't undertake opening their pub up to the likes of us swingers lightly, but from what I've seen it works well. In the current climate any savvy business owners are going to do what they think is best for their business and if that means welcoming a certain type of person be it bikers, swingers, the WI or the local stamp collectors club so be it.
I don't think it would be successful in every pub, but given the Rose and Crown's location and layout it does work well. Regulars in one side, us lot in the other. I've known the regs to stray over and vise versa but everyone respects everyone else.
As for comments like
I would be a little concerned about people who are not regulars tho
That implies we're either giving blow jobs under the table or we're stupid - neither of which applies to most of us
We've been in on a few occasions where non regulars have been in the lounge and been blissfully unaware of what we do in our private lives in the same way we've no idea what they get up to.
We're just a group of like minded people that drink in the same pub as each other, we're not shagging over the bar!!
Kitten x "but kitten hunni that was our next idea theres lots of room to get ya over the bar lol kat sez strapon at the ready | |||
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"Its no different than a darts night I guess" We've done that too!! I was shit
"But I would be happier not being tonights circus act" If it was like that we wouldn't go - simple as that. "besides which I did used to otganise socials in birmingham where we would go bowling, drinking, eating etc in various venue's and I often fely uncomfortable if the conversation got too loud and folk became aware of our activities But we cant all feel the same "I would feel the same as you! x | |||
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" we're not shagging over the bar!! but kitten hunni that was our next idea theres lots of room to get ya over the bar lol kat sez strapon at the ready "After hours is another story | |||
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"i can lower the tone in any bar doesnt need to be a swingers one lol!! xx"haha you do make me giggle | |||
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"i can lower the tone in any bar doesnt need to be a swingers one lol!! xx"you and me both lol kev | |||
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"i can lower the tone in any bar doesnt need to be a swingers one lol!! xx"A woman after my own heart!!
Kitten x | |||
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"Having come back to ya pub the next day before we went home after the socials We know that your regulars dont have a problem with us lot lol They are a great bunch and you have a great pub Long live the Rose and Crown 9but if anyone finds the back car park knocking around can ya please return it0 lol xx "Short stuff the car park is still there silly.... its under the beer garden and decking
" After hours is another story "You are such a tart kitten lol, We have just had the wii set u for the wii nights kitten, could be interesting after hours  | |||
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"After hours is another story
You are such a tart kitten lol, We have just had the wii set u for the wii nights kitten, could be interesting after hours
"Hannah Montana dance off it is then! What do ya say Kev? | |||
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"A swinger friendly pub??? Okay, I am kind of baffled here. Okay if you are closing a pub for a swingers night, all well and good...but if your a swinger visitng a pub, arent you just the same as eveyone else...regardless of what you do in your spare time. Or do you mean a place where you can meet socially and behave in an antisocial manner with non swingers and it be accepted? If I were out for the evening and witnessed what I have at 'social' evenings with swingers, I would not be happy. Time and a place." The swingers that use our pub at weekends are not stupid and any new swingers that come to the pub are told that descretion is a must, if you had read earlier posts you would have understand this as it clearly says, both our regulars and swingers respect each other. We are not shagging over the bar lol
Even at our socials not alot of playing goes on, just a hell of alot of flirting and plenty of flesh on show
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"A swinger friendly pub??? Okay, I am kind of baffled here. Okay if you are closing a pub for a swingers night, all well and good...but if your a swinger visitng a pub, arent you just the same as eveyone else...regardless of what you do in your spare time. Or do you mean a place where you can meet socially and behave in an antisocial manner with non swingers and it be accepted? If I were out for the evening and witnessed what I have at 'social' evenings with swingers, I would not be happy. Time and a place. The swingers that use our pub at weekends are not stupid and any new swingers that come to the pub are told that descretion is a must, if you had read earlier posts you would have understand this as it clearly says, both our regulars and swingers respect each other. We are not shagging over the bar lol
Even at our socials not alot of playing goes on, just a hell of alot of flirting and plenty of flesh on show
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"Or do you mean a place where you can meet socially and behave in an antisocial manner with non swingers and it be accepted?" Why because we are swingers would we behave in a antisocial manner???? | |||
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"I apologise maybe i did, but the following statement just seemed very silly to me... Or do you mean a place where you can meet socially and behave in an antisocial manner with non swingers and it be accepted? Why because we are swingers would we behave in a antisocial manner????" I knew it would be the antisocial comment that made you respond that way and put it in there deliberately. It has been my experience that thier is no such thing as a 'social'. At a swinging social I naively thought thats what is was going to be. Did I find people groping each other, getting thier bits out and generally acting like they had no self respect antisocial...yes I did...get a bloody room! Would I like to see that kind of carry on going on in my local pub....no. So, if its a swingers social I at least know now what I am in for and can make my mind up whether to go or not. If people are going to a pub just for a drink and a chat, dressed in normal attire...why does it have to be swinger friendly...unless your flaunting the fact. At the end of the day you are another punter with an interesting hobby and no-one would know any different. | |||
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"I apologise maybe i did, but the following statement just seemed very silly to me... Or do you mean a place where you can meet socially and behave in an antisocial manner with non swingers and it be accepted? Why because we are swingers would we behave in a antisocial manner???? I knew it would be the antisocial comment that made you respond that way and put it in there deliberately. It has been my experience that there is no such thing as a 'social'. At a swinging social I naively thought thats what is was going to be. Did I find people groping each other, getting thier bits out and generally acting like they had no self respect antisocial...yes I did...get a bloody room! Would I like to see that kind of carry on going on in my local pub....no. So, if its a swingers social I at least know now what I am in for and can make my mind up whether to go or not. If people are going to a pub just for a drink and a chat, dressed in normal attire...why does it have to be swinger friendly...unless your flaunting the fact. At the end of the day you are another punter with an interesting hobby and no-one would know any different. " It is swinger friendly because its a place where people can come and meet like minded people, face to face, with out the pressure some feel if they have a meet in a club with the play rooms upstairs, its a place where people new to the scene can come have a drink and a chat and ask questions. Most importantly its a place where you can meet new friends in the life style and not necessarily play mates. Is that so wrong? if so why? | |||
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"Did I find people groping each other, getting thier bits out and generally acting like they had no self respect antisocial...yes I did...get a bloody room! u been in my local then lol xx "lol. | |||
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"If swinging os so acceptable and the behaviour also accepted, why do you need the swingers to be in a seperate room?" Again if you had read all previous posts, you would have seen it said that both sides do mix. | |||
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" u been in my local then lol xx "Probably | |||
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"I apologise maybe i did, but the following statement just seemed very silly to me... Or do you mean a place where you can meet socially and behave in an antisocial manner with non swingers and it be accepted? Why because we are swingers would we behave in a antisocial manner???? I knew it would be the antisocial comment that made you respond that way and put it in there deliberately. It has been my experience that there is no such thing as a 'social'. At a swinging social I naively thought thats what is was going to be. Did I find people groping each other, getting thier bits out and generally acting like they had no self respect antisocial...yes I did...get a bloody room! Would I like to see that kind of carry on going on in my local pub....no. So, if its a swingers social I at least know now what I am in for and can make my mind up whether to go or not. If people are going to a pub just for a drink and a chat, dressed in normal attire...why does it have to be swinger friendly...unless your flaunting the fact. At the end of the day you are another punter with an interesting hobby and no-one would know any different. It is swinger friendly because its a place where people can come and meet like minded people, face to face, with out the pressure some feel if they have a meet in a club with the play rooms upstairs, its a place where people new to the scene can come have a drink and a chat and ask questions. Most importantly its a place where you can meet new friends in the life style and not necessarily play mates. Is that so wrong? if so why? " I dont see anything wrong with that..it appears quite sociable. So why the sperate rooms if that is all it is and is acceptable at your pub? | |||
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"Did I find people groping each other, getting thier bits out and generally acting like they had no self respect antisocial...yes I did...get a bloody room! u been in my local then lol xx
lol."honestly iv seen things in "ordinary" pubs that made me blush!!! the cctv cameras from last pub i owned would have made a fortune on the amatuer porn market with some of the carry on!! xx | |||
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"If swinging os so acceptable and the behaviour also accepted, why do you need the swingers to be in a seperate room? Again if you had read all previous posts, you would have seen it said that both sides do mix." As i said above both sides do mix, we usually do get the regulars in the bar and the swingers in the lounge, this was a natural thing not something we said should be. Its even been known for both sides to mix laying killer ool and darts. | |||
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"If swinging os so acceptable and the behaviour also accepted, why do you need the swingers to be in a seperate room? Again if you had read all previous posts, you would have seen it said that both sides do mix. As i said above both sides do mix, we usually do get the regulars in the bar and the swingers in the lounge, this was a natural thing not something we said should be. Its even been known for both sides to mix laying killer ool and darts." actually I have read them, you yourself stated bar for regulars, lounge for swingers, therefore segregating them, regardless of whether they mix of not! Wouldnt have anything to do with the attire some wear, the flesh on show and antics that normally surround such a 'social' would it? | |||
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"If swinging os so acceptable and the behaviour also accepted, why do you need the swingers to be in a seperate room? Again if you had read all previous posts, you would have seen it said that both sides do mix. As i said above both sides do mix, we usually do get the regulars in the bar and the swingers in the lounge, this was a natural thing not something we said should be. Its even been known for both sides to mix laying killer ool and darts." Kev or Kat, Not sure you really need to justify what you do as you have enough genuine folk who have stated in here how well your place works, and that in it's self speaks volumes. If you look back to the start of the thread I did have my reservations but I now accept you have a winning formula and long may that continue guys | |||
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"If swinging os so acceptable and the behaviour also accepted, why do you need the swingers to be in a seperate room? Again if you had read all previous posts, you would have seen it said that both sides do mix. As i said above both sides do mix, we usually do get the regulars in the bar and the swingers in the lounge, this was a natural thing not something we said should be. Its even been known for both sides to mix laying killer ool and darts. actually I have read them, you yourself stated bar for regulars, lounge for swingers, therefore segregating them, regardless of whether they mix of not! Wouldnt have anything to do with the attire some wear, the flesh on show and antics that normally surround such a 'social' would it?" No not at all, and as i said before the segregation as you put it was a natural thing not something that we ourselves enforced. Like any public place where groups meet, each have there own places, for example a saturday afternoon in our bar you get the 'older men' grouped together in the seating area at one end and the younger ones around the pool table at the other end. The swingers that use our pub are dressed as any one would be for a night out in the pub, why because they are swingers would they be dressed different? And also as previously stated, people are told discretion is a must, no 'antics' as you call them go on in the pub on a none social event night. If anyone, be that regulars or swingers where to do anything that would cause offence then they would be told to stop. if they didnt then they would be shown the door....Just like in any other pub. | |||
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"lmao...Yes, okay, they dress just as they would if they are going out with mates.......obviously your social is different to the umpteen I have visited...well done. If it works for your pub, great...like I have said, I am obviously one of the narrow minded ones." yes on a normal weekend they do, after all they come to our pub for a night out with like minded people, not a night out to play. Now on a social night where the pub is closed to the public then yes you will see alot of flesh on show. We have rules and we enforce them. As its been said, it works for us and it works well. a last note...dont knock it till you have tried it | |||
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"i wondered about the dressing bit cause iv got my first social approachin and was just goin to wear what i normally wear on a night out!! was in a wee panic lol xx "As a rule we tell people to wear what ever they feel comfy in, be that smart casual or skimpy underwear | |||
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"i wondered about the dressing bit cause iv got my first social approachin and was just goin to wear what i normally wear on a night out!! was in a wee panic lol xx "Probably best to ask the organisers what would be appropriate | |||
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"After hours is another story
You are such a tart kitten lol, We have just had the wii set u for the wii nights kitten, could be interesting after hours
Hannah Montana dance off it is then! What do ya say Kev? "wah hay ya on hunni wonder if you can get twister for the wii mind where you stick the remotes tho lol | |||
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"nope normal attire seems to be the way...but with lots of flesh on show! Just like you would on a normal night out to the pub!" Well for me a night out at the pub usually does involve lots of flesh on show - but then I am a tart lol. Seriously, as "regulars" at the Rose and Crown, and having attended socials there we can honestly say that the social events are completely different to a normal weekend night, and those of us who go understand that and behave appropriately. All I can say is that the format works and we love the Rose and Crown | |||
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"i wondered about the dressing bit cause iv got my first social approachin and was just goin to wear what i normally wear on a night out!! was in a wee panic lol xx
Probably best to ask the organisers what would be appropriate "they can take me as they find me and that will be in normal goin out clothes!! smart but sexy!! well ish !! lol xx | |||
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"actually I have read them, you yourself stated bar for regulars, lounge for swingers, therefore segregating them, regardless of whether they mix of not! Wouldnt have anything to do with the attire some wear, the flesh on show and antics that normally surround such a 'social' would it?" I find that quite funny, for Barnsley we'd all be positively over dressed!! I'm surprised at some of the comments being made, we're swingers so we must behave a certain way? You're swingers so that must mean you behave the same way you're suggesting (wrongly) we do? | |||
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"i wondered about the dressing bit cause iv got my first social approachin and was just goin to wear what i normally wear on a night out!! was in a wee panic lol xx
Probably best to ask the organisers what would be appropriate
they can take me as they find me and that will be in normal goin out clothes!! smart but sexy!! well ish !! lol xx "Now that's a very pleasant mental picture to help me through being stuck indoors during the current bad weather | |||
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"You may think that peoples opinions were smallminded, but although I didn't read the original thread, it would appear that peoples opinions were sought and indeed given. You make no mention of any favourable opnions which were given - were there any ? But to be fair, you have 2 things which would maybe bias your views. 1) You are a swinger 2) You own or run a pub which is as you say 'swinger friendly' It needs to be borne in mind that not everyone is a swinger and not everyone wants to be part of the lifestyle, much the same as some don't like a pub showing football on the tele or karaoke in the lounge. Just my thoughts "fully agree.... and to be really really cynical because someone has to be.. (might as well be the grumpy old man) you are probably going well commercially out of labelling yourself as "swinger friendly" probably brings in extra people, and I am sure that if it was affecting business negatively then it wouldn't have been brought up.... have to say it is very clever... you have the mock irish pubs, and the trendy wine bars and the ones where they are cheap and have no music.... so why not a "swinger friendly" pub, you have found your own hole in the market... in the end it all about labels... labels... labels.... a "pub" is a pub for me if i can get a decent pint, watch the sport and have a swear and banter!... cool.. ticked all the boxes for me..... but this thread almost feels like one long commercial for the business that you happen to run..... and the topic and subject matter just happens to be co-incidental... | |||
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" ............ but this thread almost feels like one long commercial for the business that you happen to run..... and the topic and subject matter just happens to be co-incidental... " Have you just worked that out? | |||
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"You may think that peoples opinions were smallminded, but although I didn't read the original thread, it would appear that peoples opinions were sought and indeed given. You make no mention of any favourable opnions which were given - were there any ? But to be fair, you have 2 things which would maybe bias your views. 1) You are a swinger 2) You own or run a pub which is as you say 'swinger friendly' It needs to be borne in mind that not everyone is a swinger and not everyone wants to be part of the lifestyle, much the same as some don't like a pub showing football on the tele or karaoke in the lounge. Just my thoughts
fully agree.... and to be really really cynical because someone has to be.. (might as well be the grumpy old man) you are probably going well commercially out of labelling yourself as "swinger friendly" probably brings in extra people, and I am sure that if it was affecting business negatively then it wouldn't have been brought up....
have to say it is very clever... you have the mock irish pubs, and the trendy wine bars and the ones where they are cheap and have no music.... so why not a "swinger friendly" pub, you have found your own hole in the market...
in the end it all about labels... labels... labels....
a "pub" is a pub for me if i can get a decent pint, watch the sport and have a swear and banter!... cool.. ticked all the boxes for me.....
but this thread almost feels like one long commercial for the business that you happen to run..... and the topic and subject matter just happens to be co-incidental...
"firsly were labiling ourseles as a swingers pub only on this swingers site were not placing an ad in the local rag ..... and no the thread is not a commercial it was a thread posted in responce to a thread of the same name in the welsh room were not using the swingers friendly as a business ploy or are we distracting away from a normal pub for locals we still have pool, sport on tv and yes karaoke if require and tbh if we remember correctly you mailed us with an interest. To which we declined maybe this has some bearing on your negative stance now | |||
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