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By *els_Bells OP Woman
over a year ago
with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc |
After almost highjacking another thread, I was wondering are you the first to put yourself down or are you the kind that oozes confidence?
I am always the first to put myself down, as I see it as a sort of defence mechanism where I will say "Yes I know I'm fat yadda yadda" etc. etc.
So are you confidence personified when it comes to your looks or are you a self put downer  |
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been bullied and controlled i now really struggle to have any confidence in myself
the mental abuse i've suffered has stripped me of everything cos i can still hear his words in my head even now we are
divorced.
oh well maybe one day i can bounce back
xx  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can put myself down for sure but like I said if you have people to boost your confidence does your self esteem the world of good.
I also believe beauty is skin deep, and inside I know I am a kind, loyal and a loving person which counts more to me than what the outside of me looks like. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have all of the usual insecurities
I never think I'm witty or clever enough in conversation, and may come across as either quite shy, or an ego the size of Africa - I'm not sure 
What do you think ?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"been bullied and controlled i now really struggle to have any confidence in myself
the mental abuse i've suffered has stripped me of everything cos i can still hear his words in my head even now we are
divorced.
oh well maybe one day i can bounce back
xx "
You will having suffered abuse many years ago, it is a question of time and self belief.
A good man will always make you feel wanted, secure and loved and you will see that and hopefully feel that in time. |
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By *els_Bells OP Woman
over a year ago
with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc |
I guess it could be the whole self esteem issue.
I was a young confident teenager, and something happened and stuff (which I wont go into) but it knocked my confidence sideways, I haven't seen it since I was 19/20.
I envy people who ooze confidence (rather than arrogance) especially bigger ladies, as I can relate to them and think that I'd love their confidence and to be happy in my own skin.
I automatically think that ladies with a beautiful slim figure would never have self esteem issues, but realistically know they can have confidence issues too |
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By *els_Bells OP Woman
over a year ago
with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc |
"I am like a little whirlwind (been described so on here), and once met and seen never forgotten but I know I can irritate the hell out of some people "
I think you're great and very much like a whirlwind. Your posts can sometimes feel like a breath of fresh air xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am like a little whirlwind (been described so on here), and once met and seen never forgotten but I know I can irritate the hell out of some people
I think you're great and very much like a whirlwind. Your posts can sometimes feel like a breath of fresh air xx"
awwww thank you xxx   |
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By *els_Bells OP Woman
over a year ago
with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc |
I apologise for a bit of a downer of a thread, just got my mind thinking.
I'm not a completely miserable cow who shys away at everything and is scared of looking in the mirror, I have built my confidence up little by little and know it takes time. After all, if I can't like myself who else is going to like me?
I know some won't like me but I'm not overly bothered on here any more, I used to worry what others thought but I'm not that concerned anymore if that makes sense |
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"I guess it could be the whole self esteem issue.
I was a young confident teenager, and something happened and stuff (which I wont go into) but it knocked my confidence sideways, I haven't seen it since I was 19/20.
I envy people who ooze confidence (rather than arrogance) especially bigger ladies, as I can relate to them and think that I'd love their confidence and to be happy in my own skin.
I automatically think that ladies with a beautiful slim figure would never have self esteem issues, but realistically know they can have confidence issues too "
I think you look sexy  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I apologise for a bit of a downer of a thread, just got my mind thinking.
I'm not a completely miserable cow who shys away at everything and is scared of looking in the mirror, I have built my confidence up little by little and know it takes time. After all, if I can't like myself who else is going to like me?
I know some won't like me but I'm not overly bothered on here any more, I used to worry what others thought but I'm not that concerned anymore if that makes sense "
If you like yourself, then it doesn't matter whether anyone else does, surely..? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I apologise for a bit of a downer of a thread, just got my mind thinking.
I'm not a completely miserable cow who shys away at everything and is scared of looking in the mirror, I have built my confidence up little by little and know it takes time. After all, if I can't like myself who else is going to like me?
I know some won't like me but I'm not overly bothered on here any more, I used to worry what others thought but I'm not that concerned anymore if that makes sense "
I think u need a day out with me |
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By *oddyWoman
over a year ago
between havant and chichester |
"I apologise for a bit of a downer of a thread, just got my mind thinking.
I'm not a completely miserable cow who shys away at everything and is scared of looking in the mirror, I have built my confidence up little by little and know it takes time. After all, if I can't like myself who else is going to like me?
I know some won't like me but I'm not overly bothered on here any more, I used to worry what others thought but I'm not that concerned anymore if that makes sense
I think u need a day out with me "
could you let the country know a month in advance so rd blocks can be put in place so you go from a to b with no hold ups and you can be followed by a recovery vehille just incase |
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I did a huge amount of work with a cognitive behavioural therapist last year so that professionally I appeared confident and collected. By focussing on projecting this (and some simple techniques such as pausing, breathing and smiling), it has become true and I am a much happier, calmer and confident person. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I apologise for a bit of a downer of a thread, just got my mind thinking.
I'm not a completely miserable cow who shys away at everything and is scared of looking in the mirror, I have built my confidence up little by little and know it takes time. After all, if I can't like myself who else is going to like me?
I know some won't like me but I'm not overly bothered on here any more, I used to worry what others thought but I'm not that concerned anymore if that makes sense
I think u need a day out with me
could you let the country know a month in advance so rd blocks can be put in place so you go from a to b with no hold ups and you can be followed by a recovery vehille just incase "
nahhhh the infamy will just go to my head |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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not especialy confident but dont see the point in mentioning my flaws,
people can see with their own eyes what you look like, they can take it or leave it. i think when people go on about their size and other things they arent too happy about then they come across as a bit self obsessed, a bit needy and they draw attention to a persons bad bits so you start to think maybe they are right and they dont look so good so why bother with them, they dont even like themselves so why would anyone else sort of thing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Over the years been bullied and on sites like fab... I had that for years until I was reading this book about loving yourself for who you are its changed me ...... I then could see I had to be true to myself who I was and start to love myself inside not just care about the outside... Had a mum who drinks and as a kid not knowing if I was going to get beaten up that stoped too when I said no more I was married with kids of my own and still she felt she could control me . I am what I am ....... happy person now and really don't care what a lot think as long as I know I am ok . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I tend to put myself down quite a lot, but at the same time I don't believe it- it is just recognising who and what I am, the good parts and the bad, emotionally and physically.
I am confident enough in myself to take piss takes from other people (infact, I quite like it if it is well done)
Personal comments for the sake of being personal are what usually provoke a negative reaction from me - be them aimed at myself or indeed others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I used to be very shy and insecure.
One day I realised that I actually liked myself and life quite a lot. I decided life was to short and fragile to let insecurity be the cause of missing out on life's adventure. Now I am very confident. Saying that, I am very self depreciating, it's because I am confident enough in who I am that I don't need an ego. Does that make sense. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I used to be very shy and insecure.
One day I realised that I actually liked myself and life quite a lot. I decided life was to short and fragile to let insecurity be the cause of missing out on life's adventure. Now I am very confident. Saying that, I am very self depreciating, it's because I am confident enough in who I am that I don't need an ego. Does that make sense. "
Total !
I am / was exactly the same  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"After almost highjacking another thread, I was wondering are you the first to put yourself down or are you the kind that oozes confidence?
I am always the first to put myself down, as I see it as a sort of defence mechanism where I will say "Yes I know I'm fat yadda yadda" etc. etc.
So are you confidence personified when it comes to your looks or are you a self put downer "
Dam squirrels always making me look bad  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I used to be very shy and insecure.
One day I realised that I actually liked myself and life quite a lot. I decided life was to short and fragile to let insecurity be the cause of missing out on life's adventure. Now I am very confident. Saying that, I am very self depreciating, it's because I am confident enough in who I am that I don't need an ego. Does that make sense. "
your right its not about ego its about being true to who you are as a person xx |
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By *els_Bells OP Woman
over a year ago
with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc |
"I apologise for a bit of a downer of a thread, just got my mind thinking.
I'm not a completely miserable cow who shys away at everything and is scared of looking in the mirror, I have built my confidence up little by little and know it takes time. After all, if I can't like myself who else is going to like me?
I know some won't like me but I'm not overly bothered on here any more, I used to worry what others thought but I'm not that concerned anymore if that makes sense
If you like yourself, then it doesn't matter whether anyone else does, surely..?"
That's what I guess I'm trying to say, but its also nice to be liked too.
Sorry I wasn't making myself clear in the initial post and blabbed on and went off on a tangent. Sorry too much sun and medication.
What I initially meant was are you the type to put yourself down (like I did in the Summer body thread) or are you the type who knows you're attractive and can do self praise for want of a better phrase.
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"been bullied and controlled i now really struggle to have any confidence in myself
the mental abuse i've suffered has stripped me of everything cos i can still hear his words in my head even now we are
divorced.
oh well maybe one day i can bounce back
xx "
 hi that's awfull I hope you can bounce back as you look very nice I have lots of folk put me down these days also here nasty things and comments about me when im out and sniggering but I love to have new friends around for coffee and chat your welcome to pop over if my way of course x |
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Pissed off at gaining the weight back, but content knowing its not my fault and will come back off. Im happy that I always make the best of my see elk, some girl ran across the train station the o other week to say how lovely I looked |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Its simple what we give out we get back . What we think about ourselves becomes the truth for us . We are the ones responsible for the thoughts we think the best and worst ,So we have to create balance and harmony of the mind .. limiting negative beliefs to become healthy happy people .. And that takes positive thinking I know ... x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Pissed off at gaining the weight back, but content knowing its not my fault and will come back off. Im happy that I always make the best of my see elk, some girl ran across the train station the o other week to say how lovely I looked"
And I bet you did xx Your a lovely woman inside and out you are. xx
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"been bullied and controlled i now really struggle to have any confidence in myself
the mental abuse i've suffered has stripped me of everything cos i can still hear his words in my head even now we are
divorced.
oh well maybe one day i can bounce back
xx
You will having suffered abuse many years ago, it is a question of time and self belief.
A good man will always make you feel wanted, secure and loved and you will see that and hopefully feel that in time."
100% spot on!!!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I think u need a day out with me
Good grief I don't think the worlds quite ready for that  "
yeah it is - live dangerously for once, it will be a laugh and fun |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Fuck me I thought hels was back then
I love it when people drag threads up from years ago, it's fun trying to guess who all the unlos's are "
i thought that - bloody loads of them at the top of the thread |
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