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Best implement to be spanked with
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"Cricket bat" harsh! 
Spatula is good, wooden spoons can be fun or the fish slice thingy from the kitchen drawer, broad hair brush, tv remote (there are more uses for the sky remote than measuring a cock  ) a thick ice pole - loads of things work pretty well  | |||
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"A tin of spam" How do you get backlift with a spam tin?  | |||
"A tin of spam How do you get backlift with a spam tin? "put it in a sock first.. durr  | |||
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"A tin of spam How do you get backlift with a spam tin?
put it in a sock first.. durr "Trainer sock, tennis sock or long kinky gray school one? | |||
"A tuna" Ahh, like this... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhJQp-q1Y1s | |||
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