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10 Lovemaking Tips for Seniors

By *aravancouple OP Man over a year ago

A Secret Hideaway In the caravan of love

1. Put on your glasses. Double check that your partner is actually in bed with you.

2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.

3. Set the mood with lighting. Turn them ALL OFF!

4. Make sure you put 999 on your speed dial before you begin.

5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember.

6. Keep extra polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed.

7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act.

8. Make all the noise you want. The neighbours are deaf too.

9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news.

10. Don't even think about trying it twice.

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

dont go to the loo half way through, coz ya might forget what ya woz doin

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Remember to remove the incontinence pads before penetration.

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Remember: He may have trouble remembering where your pussy is so you might have to show him which wrinkle he needs to put his cock in between.