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Crisis of Masculinity

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By *icketysplits OP   Woman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don't take anything Abbot says seriously. Horrid woman!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

For me, it means being me

I would sooner be a good person than a model man

There is no crisis here

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By *emmefataleWoman  over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?"

I think women cut mens bollocks off all the time, whenever they get the chance, first they want a modern man, then they dont.....what are guys spose to do?

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By *emmefataleWoman  over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"I don't take anything Abbot says seriously. Horrid woman!"

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By *icketysplits OP   Woman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I don't take anything Abbot says seriously. Horrid woman!"

Ignore the Abbott bit (she once accused me of being precious about my ethnicity so I do ignore her quite often). The bit that interested me is the feeling that men might have that it is difficult being a man these days. I do say might have...

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By *emmefataleWoman  over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

Maybe women need to look closer to home...and see that many have lost their femininity.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I heard this on the radio.

Is it just me or does this all sound a load of rubbish?

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By *icketysplits OP   Woman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?I think women cut mens bollocks off all the time, whenever they get the chance, first they want a modern man, then they dont.....what are guys spose to do?"

Is that what she is doing, again, with this piece?

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?"

I kind of wonder how much women (and I include myself here and take responsibility) have contributed to this...

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By *yrdwomanWoman  over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?

I kind of wonder how much women (and I include myself here and take responsibility) have contributed to this..."

We still don't have true equality in this country. I think when we do, and when things finally settle down after that, men and women can finally stop fighting. Til then....*shrugs*

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?"

Being able to comfortably urinate into a bottle...

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By *icketysplits OP   Woman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?

I kind of wonder how much women (and I include myself here and take responsibility) have contributed to this..."

In order to achieve some level of equality for women men have lost something?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I asked a similar question to my TA buddies earlier - all of them pretty much said that they get accused of being sexist when they behave 'manly' and then accused of being in a crisis when we don't! What are we supposed to do?! Help!

Damned if we do, damned if we don't!

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By *emmefataleWoman  over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?I think women cut mens bollocks off all the time, whenever they get the chance, first they want a modern man, then they dont.....what are guys spose to do?

Is that what she is doing, again, with this piece?"

I think she is blaming men as usual.

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?

I kind of wonder how much women (and I include myself here and take responsibility) have contributed to this...

We still don't have true equality in this country. I think when we do, and when things finally settle down after that, men and women can finally stop fighting. Til then....*shrugs*"

Yep, I can see where you re coming from, too. I do not see the need for struggle and conflict between the genders - that said it means both need to acknowledgeeach other's strength without worrying about loosing their own. It takes dialogue not debate, communcation not conflict and goodwill not battle.

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?

I kind of wonder how much women (and I include myself here and take responsibility) have contributed to this...

In order to achieve some level of equality for women men have lost something?"

I think a pendulum tends to swing from one extreme to another prior to settling somewhere in the middle of genuine equality.

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By *icketysplits OP   Woman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I asked a similar question to my TA buddies earlier - all of them pretty much said that they get accused of being sexist when they behave 'manly' and then accused of being in a crisis when we don't! What are we supposed to do?! Help!

Damned if we do, damned if we don't! "

Is it a genuine worry? Do men feel damned?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

My litmus test is making sure my 3 boys don't suffer from hyper-masculinity... or celebrate heartlessness, disrespect women's autonomy, or grow up homophobic ... think we are getting there.

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"I asked a similar question to my TA buddies earlier - all of them pretty much said that they get accused of being sexist when they behave 'manly' and then accused of being in a crisis when we don't! What are we supposed to do?! Help!

Damned if we do, damned if we don't! "

Completely get where they are coming from. At personal level I dont want to fight a battle with men in general - I am a woman, I am feminine and I like being that. I see nothing wrong with enjoying that difference that gender brings. That said it is possible to have both, the difference between the genders and equality in other areas.

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By *yrdwomanWoman  over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?

I kind of wonder how much women (and I include myself here and take responsibility) have contributed to this...

We still don't have true equality in this country. I think when we do, and when things finally settle down after that, men and women can finally stop fighting. Til then....*shrugs*

Yep, I can see where you re coming from, too. I do not see the need for struggle and conflict between the genders - that said it means both need to acknowledgeeach other's strength without worrying about loosing their own. It takes dialogue not debate, communcation not conflict and goodwill not battle. "

I don't get involved in men vs women struggles anyway. I have male friends, and I have female friends, and that's it. What I do mind is the general unfairness, on both sides. Women think men are oppressive, so they fight, then men think women are emasculating, so they fight, so then women think men are being unfair, and so on, and on.

Both sexes are tarred with the extreme behaviour of members of their gender. It all seems a bit unnecessary to me.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I asked a similar question to my TA buddies earlier - all of them pretty much said that they get accused of being sexist when they behave 'manly' and then accused of being in a crisis when we don't! What are we supposed to do?! Help!

Damned if we do, damned if we don't! "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I agree with her entirely, and read some very similar thoughts on the modern masculinity crisis in The Adonis Complex. The human male evolved over thousands of years to to hunt, fight, kill, chop wood, smash rocks etc, now suddenly we sit at desks all day, pushing pens and mice whilst filling in databases and spreadsheets - little wonder there's so many of us on sites like this with such a dramatic loss of identity.

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?

I kind of wonder how much women (and I include myself here and take responsibility) have contributed to this...

We still don't have true equality in this country. I think when we do, and when things finally settle down after that, men and women can finally stop fighting. Til then....*shrugs*

Yep, I can see where you re coming from, too. I do not see the need for struggle and conflict between the genders - that said it means both need to acknowledgeeach other's strength without worrying about loosing their own. It takes dialogue not debate, communcation not conflict and goodwill not battle.

I don't get involved in men vs women struggles anyway. I have male friends, and I have female friends, and that's it. What I do mind is the general unfairness, on both sides. Women think men are oppressive, so they fight, then men think women are emasculating, so they fight, so then women think men are being unfair, and so on, and on.

Both sexes are tarred with the extreme behaviour of members of their gender. It all seems a bit unnecessary to me. "

Indeed - completely agree. I think both sexes would do themselves a big favour in not pursing the concept of opposition and conflict, and rather pursue the complementary nature of man and woman, yin and yang.

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By *icketysplits OP   Woman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"My litmus test is making sure my 3 boys don't suffer from hyper-masculinity... or celebrate heartlessness, disrespect women's autonomy, or grow up homophobic ... think we are getting there. "

As do we.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I am happy in how I perceive my manhood and how I display it. I am a strong person, but no chest beater. I was bought up by a very strong matriarchal family, so maybe I have a balance and am not intimidated by strong females

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I asked a similar question to my TA buddies earlier - all of them pretty much said that they get accused of being sexist when they behave 'manly' and then accused of being in a crisis when we don't! What are we supposed to do?! Help!

Damned if we do, damned if we don't!

Is it a genuine worry? Do men feel damned?"

In a word, yes. Given that I'm in a Unit with guys who are doctors, bankers, engineers, in other words quite a variety of jobs - they all feel that they cannot be themselves and really have to pretend to be someone else in order not to accused of being something they are not.

I'm not sure where I personally stand on the issue, its got me thinking quite a bit. I just be 'me' all the time and really haven't given it a moments thought up until now.

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By *icketysplits OP   Woman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I agree with her entirely, and read some very similar thoughts on the modern masculinity crisis in The Adonis Complex. The human male evolved over thousands of years to to hunt, fight, kill, chop wood, smash rocks etc, now suddenly we sit at desks all day, pushing pens and mice whilst filling in databases and spreadsheets - little wonder there's so many of us on sites like this with such a dramatic loss of identity."

Is this the new hunting ground?

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By *yrdwomanWoman  over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?

I kind of wonder how much women (and I include myself here and take responsibility) have contributed to this...

We still don't have true equality in this country. I think when we do, and when things finally settle down after that, men and women can finally stop fighting. Til then....*shrugs*

Yep, I can see where you re coming from, too. I do not see the need for struggle and conflict between the genders - that said it means both need to acknowledgeeach other's strength without worrying about loosing their own. It takes dialogue not debate, communcation not conflict and goodwill not battle.

I don't get involved in men vs women struggles anyway. I have male friends, and I have female friends, and that's it. What I do mind is the general unfairness, on both sides. Women think men are oppressive, so they fight, then men think women are emasculating, so they fight, so then women think men are being unfair, and so on, and on.

Both sexes are tarred with the extreme behaviour of members of their gender. It all seems a bit unnecessary to me. Indeed - completely agree. I think both sexes would do themselves a big favour in not pursing the concept of opposition and conflict, and rather pursue the complementary nature of man and woman, yin and yang."

I realise I am being a bit hypocritical here though. When a man on here says something extremely sexist, or starts mansplaining about women's behaviour, I will bite.

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"I am happy in how I perceive my manhood and how I display it. I am a strong person, but no chest beater. I was bought up by a very strong matriarchal family, so maybe I have a balance and am not intimidated by strong females "
ANd you , of course, appreciate an intelligent female standing up for herself as opposed to a loud-mouthed ladette.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I asked a similar question to my TA buddies earlier - all of them pretty much said that they get accused of being sexist when they behave 'manly' and then accused of being in a crisis when we don't! What are we supposed to do?! Help!

Damned if we do, damned if we don't! Completely get where they are coming from. At personal level I dont want to fight a battle with men in general - I am a woman, I am feminine and I like being that. I see nothing wrong with enjoying that difference that gender brings. That said it is possible to have both, the difference between the genders and equality in other areas. "

I quite agree, equality is one thing but we are all different, I don't want to spend a moment battling the opposite sex, i just want to celebrate our differences and acknowledge they exist and the extent to which they exist!

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?

I kind of wonder how much women (and I include myself here and take responsibility) have contributed to this...

We still don't have true equality in this country. I think when we do, and when things finally settle down after that, men and women can finally stop fighting. Til then....*shrugs*

Yep, I can see where you re coming from, too. I do not see the need for struggle and conflict between the genders - that said it means both need to acknowledgeeach other's strength without worrying about loosing their own. It takes dialogue not debate, communcation not conflict and goodwill not battle.

I don't get involved in men vs women struggles anyway. I have male friends, and I have female friends, and that's it. What I do mind is the general unfairness, on both sides. Women think men are oppressive, so they fight, then men think women are emasculating, so they fight, so then women think men are being unfair, and so on, and on.

Both sexes are tarred with the extreme behaviour of members of their gender. It all seems a bit unnecessary to me. Indeed - completely agree. I think both sexes would do themselves a big favour in not pursing the concept of opposition and conflict, and rather pursue the complementary nature of man and woman, yin and yang.

I realise I am being a bit hypocritical here though. When a man on here says something extremely sexist, or starts mansplaining about women's behaviour, I will bite. "

I am not sure it is hypocritical to be honest. I think we all have a place in society and if we are where we feel comfortable in our place, our gender, our status then the need to be aggressive disappears and we only stand up when we feel under attack.

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By *icketysplits OP   Woman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I asked a similar question to my TA buddies earlier - all of them pretty much said that they get accused of being sexist when they behave 'manly' and then accused of being in a crisis when we don't! What are we supposed to do?! Help!

Damned if we do, damned if we don't!

Is it a genuine worry? Do men feel damned?

In a word, yes. Given that I'm in a Unit with guys who are doctors, bankers, engineers, in other words quite a variety of jobs - they all feel that they cannot be themselves and really have to pretend to be someone else in order not to accused of being something they are not.

I'm not sure where I personally stand on the issue, its got me thinking quite a bit. I just be 'me' all the time and really haven't given it a moments thought up until now."

I'd be interested in meeting your TA buddies to hear their thoughts. Men choosing to do "manly" things and feeling damned. It's interesting.

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"I asked a similar question to my TA buddies earlier - all of them pretty much said that they get accused of being sexist when they behave 'manly' and then accused of being in a crisis when we don't! What are we supposed to do?! Help!

Damned if we do, damned if we don't! Completely get where they are coming from. At personal level I dont want to fight a battle with men in general - I am a woman, I am feminine and I like being that. I see nothing wrong with enjoying that difference that gender brings. That said it is possible to have both, the difference between the genders and equality in other areas.

I quite agree, equality is one thing but we are all different, I don't want to spend a moment battling the opposite sex, i just want to celebrate our differences and acknowledge they exist and the extent to which they exist!"

Could not have put it better myself!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"little wonder there's so many of us on sites like this with such a dramatic loss of identity."

On the contrary, I think many people, both men and women find some sort of identity on sites like this

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Either way ... a brilliant and thought provoking thread, Lickety

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I am happy in how I perceive my manhood and how I display it. I am a strong person, but no chest beater. I was bought up by a very strong matriarchal family, so maybe I have a balance and am not intimidated by strong females ANd you , of course, appreciate an intelligent female standing up for herself as opposed to a loud-mouthed ladette. "

I don't mind if a woman is strong, intelligent and independent... or a ladette, just so long as she has dinner on the table when I get home

*runs and hides*

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"I am happy in how I perceive my manhood and how I display it. I am a strong person, but no chest beater. I was bought up by a very strong matriarchal family, so maybe I have a balance and am not intimidated by strong females ANd you , of course, appreciate an intelligent female standing up for herself as opposed to a loud-mouthed ladette.

I don't mind if a woman is strong, intelligent and independent... or a ladette, just so long as she has dinner on the table when I get home

*runs and hides*"

pmsl I ll find you

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I asked a similar question to my TA buddies earlier - all of them pretty much said that they get accused of being sexist when they behave 'manly' and then accused of being in a crisis when we don't! What are we supposed to do?! Help!

Damned if we do, damned if we don't!

Is it a genuine worry? Do men feel damned?

In a word, yes. Given that I'm in a Unit with guys who are doctors, bankers, engineers, in other words quite a variety of jobs - they all feel that they cannot be themselves and really have to pretend to be someone else in order not to accused of being something they are not.

I'm not sure where I personally stand on the issue, its got me thinking quite a bit. I just be 'me' all the time and really haven't given it a moments thought up until now.

I'd be interested in meeting your TA buddies to hear their thoughts. Men choosing to do "manly" things and feeling damned. It's interesting."

Doing 'manly' things in the strict environment of ridiculously battle hardened men is one thing but doing similar things in the wider world is pressing issue.

I was referring to feelings in the wider world and not what we do 'on the weekends'. Apologies if I didn't make that separation clearer.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?"

If I am going to be honest here, I'd say women were not given the respect they deserved in the past. They were oppressed and disrespected. That was unfair when viewed from any angle.

In today's society, equality has become a weapon similar to racism where anything that has an aroma, fragrance or inkling of not being totally for women is seen as inequality. Equality (here meaning between men and women) has become like the oppression or emasculation of men. It seems as if women now cry foul when they are not favoured and then either keep quiet or see it as right when men are oppressed. In most break-ups the women get the kids and that's all fine, even when the woman in question is far worse than the man...

Most men, see it as an easy way to get the approval of women by bashing a man to favour of a woman. If we are talking equality, let's make it equality and not pick and choose. Let the best get the jobs and let the offenders face similar justice...

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"

Doing 'manly' things in the strict environment of ridiculously battle hardened men is one thing but doing similar things in the wider world is pressing issue.

I was referring to feelings in the wider world and not what we do 'on the weekends'. Apologies if I didn't make that separation clearer. "

I have a lot of contact with SAS guys and this so fits what many of them say

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?

If I am going to be honest here, I'd say women were not given the respect they deserved in the past. They were oppressed and disrespected. That was unfair when viewed from any angle.

In today's society, equality has become a weapon similar to racism where anything that has an aroma, fragrance or inkling of not being totally for women is seen as inequality. Equality (here meaning between men and women) has become like the oppression or emasculation of men. It seems as if women now cry foul when they are not favoured and then either keep quiet or see it as right when men are oppressed. In most break-ups the women get the kids and that's all fine, even when the woman in question is far worse than the man...

Most men, see it as an easy way to get the approval of women by bashing a man to favour of a woman. If we are talking equality, let's make it equality and not pick and choose. Let the best get the jobs and let the offenders face similar justice...

"

That is what genuine equality is all about !

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. She says that "this generation no longer asks itself what it means to be a man" and goes on to say that men are "suffering from hyper-masculinity... a celebration of heartlessness, lack of respect for women's autonomy, normalisation of homophobia..."

Are men struggling to be men? What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?

If I am going to be honest here, I'd say women were not given the respect they deserved in the past. They were oppressed and disrespected. That was unfair when viewed from any angle.

In today's society, equality has become a weapon similar to racism where anything that has an aroma, fragrance or inkling of not being totally for women is seen as inequality. Equality (here meaning between men and women) has become like the oppression or emasculation of men. It seems as if women now cry foul when they are not favoured and then either keep quiet or see it as right when men are oppressed. In most break-ups the women get the kids and that's all fine, even when the woman in question is far worse than the man...

Most men, see it as an easy way to get the approval of women by bashing a man to favour of a woman. If we are talking equality, let's make it equality and not pick and choose. Let the best get the jobs and let the offenders face similar justice...

That is what genuine equality is all about ! "

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By *abioMan  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

actually.... i may put a different spin on it...

I think there is a generation of men out there who may not know how to be "fatherly" as such, because they grew up without one....

my dad wasn't/isn't much of a dad to me... and I grew up in a household full of very strong women.. and that in a sense has moulded me.... but I was still able to have some good male influences around me....and again that has helped me

but there are men out there that haven't had that male influence there..... and again this generation is beginning to mirror the last..

its not that they don't know how to be men, and yes women have gotten stronger, its that they don't always know how to be fathers and that male influence...

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"actually.... i may put a different spin on it...

I think there is a generation of men out there who may not know how to be "fatherly" as such, because they grew up without one....

my dad wasn't/isn't much of a dad to me... and I grew up in a household full of very strong women.. and that in a sense has moulded me.... but I was still able to have some good male influences around me....and again that has helped me

but there are men out there that haven't had that male influence there..... and again this generation is beginning to mirror the last..

its not that they don't know how to be men, and yes women have gotten stronger, its that they don't always know how to be fathers and that male influence..."

That is also a very valid point. There is a difference between being a manly man to a female partner and being a dad.

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By *icketysplits OP   Woman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"actually.... i may put a different spin on it...

I think there is a generation of men out there who may not know how to be "fatherly" as such, because they grew up without one....

my dad wasn't/isn't much of a dad to me... and I grew up in a household full of very strong women.. and that in a sense has moulded me.... but I was still able to have some good male influences around me....and again that has helped me

but there are men out there that haven't had that male influence there..... and again this generation is beginning to mirror the last..

its not that they don't know how to be men, and yes women have gotten stronger, its that they don't always know how to be fathers and that male influence..."

That's a very good point. Where do boys get their male influence when in a female single parent family and have few male teachers at school?

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

So... do men find themselves a bit emasculated these days? I mean really, do we intimate you guys?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It this all a southern thing? I ask as most of the guys up this way still have their balls, a sense of humour and don't seem to need to pander to all the evaluation rubbish.

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By *icketysplits OP   Woman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"It this all a southern thing? I ask as most of the guys up this way still have their balls, a sense of humour and don't seem to need to pander to all the evaluation rubbish. "

I don't know - is it just a southern thing?

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Come on guys - if you have said balls - please enter your comments here;-)

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"It this all a southern thing? I ask as most of the guys up this way still have their balls, a sense of humour and don't seem to need to pander to all the evaluation rubbish.

I don't know - is it just a southern thing?"

I am really struggling with the idea that "manliness" perceived or otherwise is dependent on where you were born

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It this all a southern thing? I ask as most of the guys up this way still have their balls, a sense of humour and don't seem to need to pander to all the evaluation rubbish.

I don't know - is it just a southern thing?I am really struggling with the idea that "manliness" perceived or otherwise is dependent on where you were born "

Struggle away if you don't understand the concept of nurture opposed to nature you are not on your own as many do.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity. "

I'm pretty certain im as masculine as I can be.

Im 100% straight with zero margin for error on my manliness.

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Diane Abbott has written that British men are facing a crisis of masculinity.

I'm pretty certain im as masculine as I can be.

Im 100% straight with zero margin for error on my manliness.

"

You know your profile actually reflects that

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So... do men find themselves a bit emasculated these days? I mean really, do we intimate you guys? "

I don't see that emasculation is a result of intimidation

I think much of it is through choice and a desire to be a stronger and more well rounded person

I don't feel emasculated by women, infact I love strong women, neither do I feel emasculated cos I sleep with guys or because I enjoy the occasional bit of campery.

It could well be that the image of what it is to be a man has changed - and in my opinion, for the better

The old fashioned stereotypical male will hopefully be relegated to historical parody before too long.

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"So... do men find themselves a bit emasculated these days? I mean really, do we intimate you guys?

I don't see that emasculation is a result of intimidation

I think much of it is through choice and a desire to be a stronger and more well rounded person

I don't feel emasculated by women, infact I love strong women, neither do I feel emasculated cos I sleep with guys or because I enjoy the occasional bit of campery.

It could well be that the image of what it is to be a man has changed - and in my opinion, for the better

The old fashioned stereotypical male will hopefully be relegated to historical parody before too long."

See this is where I am coming from, Bussy - a truly manly man needs no proof of his identity. He need not worry what other people think nore does he have to deny the capability to cry when appropriate. A manly man is not all about muscles but more about confidence in what he is - somewhere along the lines the complementary part to woman.

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By *riendly foeWoman  over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814


"So... do men find themselves a bit emasculated these days? I mean really, do we intimate you guys?

I don't see that emasculation is a result of intimidation

I think much of it is through choice and a desire to be a stronger and more well rounded person

I don't feel emasculated by women, infact I love strong women, neither do I feel emasculated cos I sleep with guys or because I enjoy the occasional bit of campery.

It could well be that the image of what it is to be a man has changed - and in my opinion, for the better

The old fashioned stereotypical male will hopefully be relegated to historical parody before too long."

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

You know your profile actually reflects that "

It bleedimg well should do too!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"...

What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?"

I think it depends on where the man lives, who his friends are, who his family are.

There is a whole spectrum of 'man types', same as there is a spectrum of 'women types'. There are also gender neutral people and everything in between.

It all depends on who the man interacts with. For example, a feminine man will be accepted in some circles but not in others.

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"...

What does it mean to be a man today in modern Britain?

I think it depends on where the man lives, who his friends are, who his family are.

There is a whole spectrum of 'man types', same as there is a spectrum of 'women types'. There are also gender neutral people and everything in between.

It all depends on who the man interacts with. For example, a feminine man will be accepted in some circles but not in others.

"

I can see where you are coming from - an for example in Art circles the man with a good dose of femininity is more at home then perhaps in the world of the Armed Forces. At the end of the day (my favourite saying at the moment) it is all about each man finding his circle of comfort - there is no right or wrong really.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I wrote something similar to Aphrodites early response on another thread a few weeks ago and immediately it was rubbished, it seemed, by other male responders. Oh well, here it is again ...

"Men and women are just different, sensitive to each other in different ways. Each brings a different set of skills to life. We should accept and celebrate those differences and skills, not fight and try to change each other. Life could be so much more fun. It's one of the challenges, maybe the biggest one, set us by whoever our superior being may be".

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I wrote something similar to Aphrodites early response on another thread a few weeks ago and immediately it was rubbished, it seemed, by other male responders. Oh well, here it is again ...

"Men and women are just different, sensitive to each other in different ways. Each brings a different set of skills to life. We should accept and celebrate those differences and skills, not fight and try to change each other. Life could be so much more fun. It's one of the challenges, maybe the biggest one, set us by whoever our superior being may be".

"

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"I wrote something similar to Aphrodites early response on another thread a few weeks ago and immediately it was rubbished, it seemed, by other male responders. Oh well, here it is again ...

"Men and women are just different, sensitive to each other in different ways. Each brings a different set of skills to life. We should accept and celebrate those differences and skills, not fight and try to change each other. Life could be so much more fun. It's one of the challenges, maybe the biggest one, set us by whoever our superior being may be".

"

So very true and worded much better than I did.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No crisis here. I am very happy in my masculinity The fact that I celebrate female liberation and the equality of life opportunity for women in no way conflicts with, contradicts or threatens my masculinity.

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By *odareyouMan  over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

No crisis of masculinity here,,

I choose to put the toilet seat down,, not because I ve been emasculated,,,

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By *icketysplits OP   Woman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"No crisis of masculinity here,,

I choose to put the toilet seat down,, not because I ve been emasculated,,, "

For this, I thank you!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

To quote monty python

'I know my place'

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By *unky monkeyMan  over a year ago

in the night garden

LOL Diane Abbot has penis envy yo!

All my bros are like totally masculinated!

... erm except Paul. Paul is a bit ghey.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Have respect for women but in no means intimidated by women. I blame the skinny jeans brigade of today. Id like to chat to this diane.and maybe put her in her place.

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"No crisis here. I am very happy in my masculinity The fact that I celebrate female liberation and the equality of life opportunity for women in no way conflicts with, contradicts or threatens my masculinity. "
As always - a great and balanced view from you

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"No crisis of masculinity here,,

I choose to put the toilet seat down,, not because I ve been emasculated,,, "

Wow - I am really impressed as well

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