A man goes to the psychiatrist completely naked except for clingfilm wrapped round his nether regions. The psychiatrist says "I can clearly see your nuts".

I know it's not a willy joke but it's the best I could manage at short notice.

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By *rthur30Man 3 days ago

Warrington

"Did you hear Mary Poppins stopped wearing lipstick while giving head?

Apparently, the super-color fragile lipstick makes the dicks atrocious."

Genius!

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By *_qattMan 3 days ago

All Over

What’s the difference between a chickpea and a grape..

I’ve never had a grape on my face

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By *echnosonic_BrummieMan 3 days ago

Willenhall

I used to be addicted to masturbation, but now I'm addicted to sex.

My addiction got out of hand.

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By *uero_cuMan 3 days ago

Dublin

Q: What's the difference between anal sex and oral sex?

A: Oral sex makes your day. Anal sex makes your w*hole week/weak.

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By *untimes wantedMan 3 days ago

Huddersfield

Man says to Woman

Do you want to hear a joke about my penis ? ..never mind its too long.

Woman replies to Man

Do you want to hear a joke about my vagina?..never mind you'll never get it.

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By *reeneggsandsamMan 3 days ago

Perpignan and cap

Jethros wife slips coming out of the bath, does the splits and hits the floor and she's stuck there like a plunger. He can't get her up so phone's Denzel for help. Two of them can't lift her (because of the suction) so Denzel sends Jethro to the garage for a hammer and chisel, they're going to smash a tile. When Jethro returns Denzel is playing with her tits "Denzel"! shouts Jethro. "Denzel, what are you doing"?

"I'm trying to turn sex her up, then we can slide her over to where the tiles are cheaper "!

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By *ild_oatsMan 3 days ago

the land of saints & sinners

Life is often like a dick…..

It can be hard for no reason.

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By *ny1local OP Man 2 days ago

READING

"Did you hear Mary Poppins stopped wearing lipstick while giving head?

Apparently, the super-color fragile lipstick makes the dicks atrocious."
that's got to be the best so far..brilliant!

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By *ebastion_FiddlesticksMan 2 days ago

My ex boss was a bloke named Richard. He was horrid to everyone. So we knew him as Dickhead.

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