FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Meeting an old lady friend....
Meeting an old lady friend....
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"Having recently split up, and speaking to an old work colleague last weekend, I told her I was now single and she said, oh ill let an old extra marital flame that I was now single, low and behold she messaged me last night, we exchanged messages and then spoke on the phone for a while, filling each other in on the last 18ys since we stopped, shagging....we are going out for a drink and something to eat tomorrow evening, and whilst I'd like to a little more than a drink and food, I am wanting to let her know about my newly found hobby on fab, not necessarily to play with her on here, but more from a being honest point of view. Any thoughts or experiences of people who have found themselves in similar dilemmas.... "No thoughts....? | |||
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"Just enjoy the evening for what it is, a night out with an old friend. Whatever else comes from it will be a pleasant bonus. Enjoy "I suppose I'm thinking that if we hit it off as we did last night whilst talking, and end up getting carried away, I'd rather she knew from the off as opposed to me telling her after. Now she was fairly broad minded, but she may be pissed if I tell her before anything happened? I suppose I could see how the evening goes...? | |||
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"hear all, see all , say fuck all. if you like her lots delete fab account . move forwards not backwards" This. Do this | |||
"You might decide Fab can take a back seat for a while then you'll have told her for no reason." I could, but I also don't want to jump straight into anything serious so soon after my marriage being over, which was why I joined fab as opposed to the dating sites, after 30+ yrs and one affair I have a lot of new things to explore....  | |||
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"You might decide Fab can take a back seat for a while then you'll have told her for no reason. I could, but I also don't want to jump straight into anything serious so soon after my marriage being over, which was why I joined fab as opposed to the dating sites, after 30+ yrs and one affair I have a lot of new things to explore.... "Then just tell her that. Open and honest communication. But leave out the Fab bit, it’s superfluous information at the moment. | |||
"You might decide Fab can take a back seat for a while then you'll have told her for no reason. I could, but I also don't want to jump straight into anything serious so soon after my marriage being over, which was why I joined fab as opposed to the dating sites, after 30+ yrs and one affair I have a lot of new things to explore....
Then just tell her that. Open and honest communication. But leave out the Fab bit, it’s superfluous information at the moment."Good idea, this is the problem when I'm an over-thinker  | |||
"You might decide Fab can take a back seat for a while then you'll have told her for no reason. I could, but I also don't want to jump straight into anything serious so soon after my marriage being over, which was why I joined fab as opposed to the dating sites, after 30+ yrs and one affair I have a lot of new things to explore.... "Of course but people change their minds even when they are sure they know what they want. | |||
"You might decide Fab can take a back seat for a while then you'll have told her for no reason. I could, but I also don't want to jump straight into anything serious so soon after my marriage being over, which was why I joined fab as opposed to the dating sites, after 30+ yrs and one affair I have a lot of new things to explore....
Of course but people change their minds even when they are sure they know what they want. "I know that, but my biggest fear is jumping into anything serious or any kind of relationship until I have chance to make sure I'm ready for one...I don't feel I'm ready for anything serious yet | |||
"You might decide Fab can take a back seat for a while then you'll have told her for no reason. I could, but I also don't want to jump straight into anything serious so soon after my marriage being over, which was why I joined fab as opposed to the dating sites, after 30+ yrs and one affair I have a lot of new things to explore....
Of course but people change their minds even when they are sure they know what they want.
I know that, but my biggest fear is jumping into anything serious or any kind of relationship until I have chance to make sure I'm ready for one...I don't feel I'm ready for anything serious yet "See how tonight goes, and if you sense that she wants something more serious, then you be honest and tell her that you're not ready for that. Like someone said, honest communication - this is always best. Basically you need to think about what you really want, don't fall into something just because it appeals to someone else. But have fun - that's the most important thing - from a fellow over thinker!! | |||
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"Having recently split up, and speaking to an old work colleague last weekend, I told her I was now single and she said, oh ill let an old extra marital flame that I was now single, low and behold she messaged me last night, we exchanged messages and then spoke on the phone for a while, filling each other in on the last 18ys since we stopped, shagging....we are going out for a drink and something to eat tomorrow evening, and whilst I'd like to a little more than a drink and food, I am wanting to let her know about my newly found hobby on fab, not necessarily to play with her on here, but more from a being honest point of view. Any thoughts or experiences of people who have found themselves in similar dilemmas.... "Why would you so soon | |||
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"Just chill out. If the evening goes well, then maybe think about telling her, but don’t make “I’m thinking about swinging” your first line. I imagine you will have the “what type of relationship are you looking for” discussion at some point." Haha no I won't, promise | |||
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"I'm surprised at so many people saying not to mention it from the start. I absolutely would tell someone before i became intimate with them. It sets the expectations from the beginning. How to have the conversation becomes a little more tricky, not something you just want to drop in. But I imagine the conversation of what you've been doing since your marriage ended and whether you've dated will come up which is an easy opening to being honest. Either way good luck and have a lovely evening " Cheers, think that's the best approach x  | |||
"Can't you just casually drop it in, in passing that you've signed up for the usual dating sites and found a more exciting one called fab .. and then take it from there? " I would go with this. Then you can gage her reaction when you explain what Fab is. You can say you joined ot of simple curiosity but not sure you'll stay, unless of course she absolutely loves the idea, then you can have some exciting conversations!! Good luck and hope you have a lovely evening. Ruby | |||
"Just enjoy the evening for what it is, a night out with an old friend. Whatever else comes from it will be a pleasant bonus. Enjoy
I suppose I'm thinking that if we hit it off as we did last night whilst talking, and end up getting carried away, I'd rather she knew from the off as opposed to me telling her after. Now she was fairly broad minded, but she may be pissed if I tell her before anything happened? I suppose I could see how the evening goes...? "I'd do it now OP, especially if you are predicting a sexual relationship with her, not everyone reacts positively to promiscuous people... | |||
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"Just enjoy the evening for what it is, a night out with an old friend. Whatever else comes from it will be a pleasant bonus. Enjoy
I suppose I'm thinking that if we hit it off as we did last night whilst talking, and end up getting carried away, I'd rather she knew from the off as opposed to me telling her after. Now she was fairly broad minded, but she may be pissed if I tell her before anything happened? I suppose I could see how the evening goes...?
I'd do it now OP, especially if you are predicting a sexual relationship with her, not everyone reacts positively to promiscuous people..."To be fair, I'll have more of an idea of what she has in mind, just a drink or two and a bite to eat once I see what she's wearing. I am sure she'll remember I loved it when she wore a certain type of outfit  | |||
"Can't you just casually drop it in, in passing that you've signed up for the usual dating sites and found a more exciting one called fab .. and then take it from there? " I think that’s quite doable, just keep it casual and see which way the conversation goes. If it all goes a bit embarrassingly quiet then move on swiftly, if she becomes a bit inquisitive about it then just give a bit of an outline and gauge her response to determine how much you want to tell her. Most importantly have a good meal and catchup. | |||
"You might decide Fab can take a back seat for a while then you'll have told her for no reason. I could, but I also don't want to jump straight into anything serious so soon after my marriage being over, which was why I joined fab as opposed to the dating sites, after 30+ yrs and one affair I have a lot of new things to explore....
Of course but people change their minds even when they are sure they know what they want.
I know that, but my biggest fear is jumping into anything serious or any kind of relationship until I have chance to make sure I'm ready for one...I don't feel I'm ready for anything serious yet "Don't jump into anything serious then! It's a second date so I don't think you need to worry - you might be overthinking this slightly... | |||
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"Get her some flowers. I suggest pampas grass."  | |||
"Can't you just casually drop it in, in passing that you've signed up for the usual dating sites and found a more exciting one called fab .. and then take it from there? " What she said.  | |||
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"Can't you just casually drop it in, in passing that you've signed up for the usual dating sites and found a more exciting one called fab .. and then take it from there? " I'd go with this approach too, slide it into conversation about how regular dating sites are not for you but.. See what reaction you get. X | |||
"Having recently split up, and speaking to an old work colleague last weekend, I told her I was now single and she said, oh ill let an old extra marital flame that I was now single, low and behold she messaged me last night, we exchanged messages and then spoke on the phone for a while, filling each other in on the last 18ys since we stopped, shagging....we are going out for a drink and something to eat tomorrow evening, and whilst I'd like to a little more than a drink and food, I am wanting to let her know about my newly found hobby on fab, not necessarily to play with her on here, but more from a being honest point of view. Any thoughts or experiences of people who have found themselves in similar dilemmas.... "So we met up this evening for a drink and a bite to eat, and got on like a house on fire, all the old flirting and touching, so having talked about what we have been upto for the last 18yrs, we talked about dating, being single, guessing the feelings I had were reciprocated, I mentioned the "website" I'd heard of where people met for sex, I described it as a rabbit hole....it wasn't met with any degree of judgement. So we both know where we stand, we will see each other again, I will continue in my rabbit-holeing and things will go wherever they go | |||
"Having recently split up, and speaking to an old work colleague last weekend, I told her I was now single and she said, oh ill let an old extra marital flame that I was now single, low and behold she messaged me last night, we exchanged messages and then spoke on the phone for a while, filling each other in on the last 18ys since we stopped, shagging....we are going out for a drink and something to eat tomorrow evening, and whilst I'd like to a little more than a drink and food, I am wanting to let her know about my newly found hobby on fab, not necessarily to play with her on here, but more from a being honest point of view. Any thoughts or experiences of people who have found themselves in similar dilemmas....
So we met up this evening for a drink and a bite to eat, and got on like a house on fire, all the old flirting and touching, so having talked about what we have been upto for the last 18yrs, we talked about dating, being single, guessing the feelings I had were reciprocated, I mentioned the "website" I'd heard of where people met for sex, I described it as a rabbit hole....it wasn't met with any degree of judgement. So we both know where we stand, we will see each other again, I will continue in my rabbit-holeing and things will go wherever they go "Well that sounds like a great evening was had and you both walked away smiling. | |||
"Having recently split up, and speaking to an old work colleague last weekend, I told her I was now single and she said, oh ill let an old extra marital flame that I was now single, low and behold she messaged me last night, we exchanged messages and then spoke on the phone for a while, filling each other in on the last 18ys since we stopped, shagging....we are going out for a drink and something to eat tomorrow evening, and whilst I'd like to a little more than a drink and food, I am wanting to let her know about my newly found hobby on fab, not necessarily to play with her on here, but more from a being honest point of view. Any thoughts or experiences of people who have found themselves in similar dilemmas....
So we met up this evening for a drink and a bite to eat, and got on like a house on fire, all the old flirting and touching, so having talked about what we have been upto for the last 18yrs, we talked about dating, being single, guessing the feelings I had were reciprocated, I mentioned the "website" I'd heard of where people met for sex, I described it as a rabbit hole....it wasn't met with any degree of judgement. So we both know where we stand, we will see each other again, I will continue in my rabbit-holeing and things will go wherever they go "Please don’t shag rabbits. | |||
"Having recently split up, and speaking to an old work colleague last weekend, I told her I was now single and she said, oh ill let an old extra marital flame that I was now single, low and behold she messaged me last night, we exchanged messages and then spoke on the phone for a while, filling each other in on the last 18ys since we stopped, shagging....we are going out for a drink and something to eat tomorrow evening, and whilst I'd like to a little more than a drink and food, I am wanting to let her know about my newly found hobby on fab, not necessarily to play with her on here, but more from a being honest point of view. Any thoughts or experiences of people who have found themselves in similar dilemmas....
So we met up this evening for a drink and a bite to eat, and got on like a house on fire, all the old flirting and touching, so having talked about what we have been upto for the last 18yrs, we talked about dating, being single, guessing the feelings I had were reciprocated, I mentioned the "website" I'd heard of where people met for sex, I described it as a rabbit hole....it wasn't met with any degree of judgement. So we both know where we stand, we will see each other again, I will continue in my rabbit-holeing and things will go wherever they go
Please don’t shag rabbits."I won't, honest it was a way of saying I've joined fab without saying I've joined fab, just said it was a website where people arranged to have sex, and I may have mentioned going down a bit of a rabbit holes and it seemed to escalate from there.... with my other friends who I have told, I call it, "appointments" so they know what sort of meet I have..  | |||
