FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Married men with permission, turn on or turn off?
Married men with permission, turn on or turn off?
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By (user no longer on site) OP 3 weeks ago
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So I’m married have been for 11 years my wife has been taken Prozac for 15 years and her sex drive is completely gone mine however, is pretty much the same as it was when I was 16 and I’m literally fed up of masturbating all the time. I think I must’ve literally completed porn hub so I’ve decided to take the next step that’s why I’m here.So we spoke about it and she has told me to “go get it just don’t tell me about it” her words not mine so… I’m just wondering because it’s hard on here is there anyone out there that finds that a turn on? Also, my work takes me all over the country so if there’s anyone that’s really hot for a married man, let’s chat ladies only please I mean men can reply, but I wouldn’t meet a man. |
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If it's the medication she was taking for four years before you got married it seems odd to blame the medication. You'd have known if it was that before the wedding and then made the choice to continue regardless.
One of my partners has a wife who knows who I am and what we do. I don't deal with don't ask don't tell dynamics 💜 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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I’m not really after advice and the Prozac effect doesn’t happen straight away. It happens over years if you’ve watched the program on it you’ll understand it. I don’t know not after advice I’m just after peoples opinion. |
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"I’m not really after advice and the Prozac effect doesn’t happen straight away. It happens over years if you’ve watched the program on it you’ll understand it. I don’t know not after advice I’m just after peoples opinion. "
Ok but what would your wife think if you secretly met someone else. I don’t know her at all but it would not help her??? |
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OP, your candour may quite possibly inhibit your chances on here or the polarising comments will, but that aside there are women on here who will absolutely meet men in your situation (i.e. married) and there are those who won't.
There's a healthy proportion of married women on Fab who are looking for clandestine encounters. |
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There are women who find it a turn on, occasionally one will answer one of these threads. There are also women who prefer to meet married men because they believe they won't become too attached or develop feelings. |
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"I’m not really after advice and the Prozac effect doesn’t happen straight away. It happens over years if you’ve watched the program on it you’ll understand it. I don’t know not after advice I’m just after peoples opinion.
Ok but what would your wife think if you secretly met someone else. I don’t know her at all but it would not help her???"
She's told him he can. She literally wants not to be a secret. |
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"I’m not really after advice and the Prozac effect doesn’t happen straight away. It happens over years if you’ve watched the program on it you’ll understand it. I don’t know not after advice I’m just after peoples opinion.
Ok but what would your wife think if you secretly met someone else. I don’t know her at all but it would not help her???
She's told him he can. She literally wants not to be a secret."
Yes sorry read too quickly. I am not sure if would tell though. Apologies if eoukd be otherwise |
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"I’m not really after advice and the Prozac effect doesn’t happen straight away. It happens over years if you’ve watched the program on it you’ll understand it. I don’t know not after advice I’m just after peoples opinion.
Ok but what would your wife think if you secretly met someone else. I don’t know her at all but it would not help her???
She's told him he can. She literally wants not to be a secret.
Yes sorry read too quickly. I am not sure if would tell though. Apologies if eoukd be otherwise "
Sorry that should read 'wants it to be a secret'.
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It's a hard decision. My wife had Huntingtons. We didn't have sex for around 20 years. Yes I missed it to start off with, but eventually it becomes less of a need. Apart from that, I just wouldn't have had the energy, with work, caring for her when I got home.Lack of sleep .And eventually caring full time, sex was the last thing on my mind. Definitely making up for it now though. |
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"I don't mind married men, as long as I can chat with their wife to make sure everything is above board....
Unfortunately it's far too easy for people to say they have "permission""
Plus it's the simple knowing that they don't want to know about it because the information would hurt them. Yes, they're choosing to allow it to happen with blinkers. But it doesn't make them happy. And I don't want to be an active participant in someone else's misery 💜 |
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"I don't mind married men, as long as I can chat with their wife to make sure everything is above board....
Unfortunately it's far too easy for people to say they have "permission""
Permission granted! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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Yeah, I understand this but she’s literally said she doesn’t wanna know anything about it, but I’m not even sure how I am about it if I’m honest I mean I don’t wanna go down the sex worker route because I think that is disrespectful. I love my family. I love my life. I just need sex more sex in my life. |
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"Yeah, I understand this but she’s literally said she doesn’t wanna know anything about it, but I’m not even sure how I am about it if I’m honest I mean I don’t wanna go down the sex worker route because I think that is disrespectful. I love my family. I love my life. I just need sex more sex in my life. "
Why is a sex worker worse than a swinger? |
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"There are women who find it a turn on, occasionally one will answer one of these threads. There are also women who prefer to meet married men because they believe they won't become too attached or develop feelings. "
I’m poly, so all bets are off when it comes to feelings, despite being married to the lovely Kittydagger! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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That’s understandable I love honesty. I did chat with her in depth about it and say are you sure you wouldn’t want to know and she basically said yes I wouldn’t want to know because I wouldn’t want to see the girl that you’re having sex with. My wife is beautiful. Don’t get me wrong And I’ll fancy them more today than I ever have but every advance is a rejection and a man can only take so much. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"Sorry to hear that but it is a completely different situation. Glad you’re doing well now though thanks for the response anyway.
If you use the quote button we can tell who you're answering  "
Right, well, you can see how new I am to this thanks |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"Yeah, I understand this but she’s literally said she doesn’t wanna know anything about it, but I’m not even sure how I am about it if I’m honest I mean I don’t wanna go down the sex worker route because I think that is disrespectful. I love my family. I love my life. I just need sex more sex in my life.
Why is a sex worker worse than a swinger? "
I guess it’s because it’s two people that wanna have sex with each other rather than one paying to have sex with the other |
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"There are women who find it a turn on, occasionally one will answer one of these threads. There are also women who prefer to meet married men because they believe they won't become too attached or develop feelings.
I’m poly, so all bets are off when it comes to feelings, despite being married to the lovely Kittydagger! "
I suspect it's more that they'd be less likely to act on any feelings or want a relationship. I don't think marriage makes you immune to feeling for another human |
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"Sorry to hear that but it is a completely different situation. Glad you’re doing well now though thanks for the response anyway.
If you use the quote button we can tell who you're answering
Right, well, you can see how new I am to this thanks"
We all had to start somewhere |
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"Yeah, I understand this but she’s literally said she doesn’t wanna know anything about it, but I’m not even sure how I am about it if I’m honest I mean I don’t wanna go down the sex worker route because I think that is disrespectful. I love my family. I love my life. I just need sex more sex in my life.
Why is a sex worker worse than a swinger?
I guess it’s because it’s two people that wanna have sex with each other rather than one paying to have sex with the other"
It's more disrespectful to pay for a service to satisfy unmet needs than it is to develop a direct and personal connection with someone to break your wedding vows with?
I'd see it the other way around I think 💜 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"Yeah, I understand this but she’s literally said she doesn’t wanna know anything about it, but I’m not even sure how I am about it if I’m honest I mean I don’t wanna go down the sex worker route because I think that is disrespectful. I love my family. I love my life. I just need sex more sex in my life.
Why is a sex worker worse than a swinger?
I guess it’s because it’s two people that wanna have sex with each other rather than one paying to have sex with the other
It's more disrespectful to pay for a service to satisfy unmet needs than it is to develop a direct and personal connection with someone to break your wedding vows with?
I'd see it the other way around I think 💜"
Good answer I just don’t think I could ever pay because I don’t know why to be honest it to countries oldest profession maybe that’s the route I should go down who knows but everything outside of our marriage is scary to me anyway so….. |
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"There are women who find it a turn on, occasionally one will answer one of these threads. There are also women who prefer to meet married men because they believe they won't become too attached or develop feelings.
I’m poly, so all bets are off when it comes to feelings, despite being married to the lovely Kittydagger!
I suspect it's more that they'd be less likely to act on any feelings or want a relationship. I don't think marriage makes you immune to feeling for another human "
The whole point of polyamory is the possibility of meaningful relationships with multiple different partners. I don’t think it’s relevant to the original post in this respect. But I think in a specific way it’s always good to acknowledge that it’s possible to have strong feelings with more than one person and not have that diminish another relationship! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"There are women who find it a turn on, occasionally one will answer one of these threads. There are also women who prefer to meet married men because they believe they won't become too attached or develop feelings.
I’m poly, so all bets are off when it comes to feelings, despite being married to the lovely Kittydagger!
I suspect it's more that they'd be less likely to act on any feelings or want a relationship. I don't think marriage makes you immune to feeling for another human
The whole point of polyamory is the possibility of meaningful relationships with multiple different partners. I don’t think it’s relevant to the original post in this respect. But I think in a specific way it’s always good to acknowledge that it’s possible to have strong feelings with more than one person and not have that diminish another relationship! "
I totally agree with you, but obviously both partners have to be on the same page for this to happen |
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"There are women who find it a turn on, occasionally one will answer one of these threads. There are also women who prefer to meet married men because they believe they won't become too attached or develop feelings.
I’m poly, so all bets are off when it comes to feelings, despite being married to the lovely Kittydagger!
I suspect it's more that they'd be less likely to act on any feelings or want a relationship. I don't think marriage makes you immune to feeling for another human
The whole point of polyamory is the possibility of meaningful relationships with multiple different partners. I don’t think it’s relevant to the original post in this respect. But I think in a specific way it’s always good to acknowledge that it’s possible to have strong feelings with more than one person and not have that diminish another relationship! "
I don't disagree but I've seen women cite not developing feelings as a reason that they like meeting married men. |
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"Purely because there’s too many married men on here that falsely claim their wife knows- I would want to have a brief chat with her before hand."
Absolutely! 100% people I’ve met have messaged Kitty just to check! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"Purely because there’s too many married men on here that falsely claim their wife knows- I would want to have a brief chat with her before hand.
Absolutely! 100% people I’ve met have messaged Kitty just to check! "
I envy you and a relationship you two have. I think it’s brilliant. Don’t get me wrong 15 years ago I felt completely different but as I’ve got older I just look at sex differently. I think it’s a gift. I think it’s something if two people are attracted to each other they should be able to have I wouldn’t mind at all with my wife wanted to do it, but I just know that she wouldn’t Believe me. I’ve spoke about it and it always escalates into her feeling like she’s worthless because she can’t give me what I need, which is why she told me to go get it and it feels weird because sometimes when she’s d*unk and I mean really d*unk, she will come onto me and we’ll have sex but I just feel that if you have to be that d*unk. it’s not a nice feeling. But I know that she loves me because everything else in our life, our children, my granddaughter my job, her job our house our life is good. It’s just that one thing that’s missing. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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Also, I have contacted a couple of women on here who on their profile say married men go straight to the top but then they say you’re not verified until you’re verified we can’t meet. How can you get verified if you can’t meet someone? I understand it’s probably a lot of scammers on here and people are wary. I just don’t know how to prove that I’m not one of them? |
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"Also, I have contacted a couple of women on here who on their profile say married men go straight to the top but then they say you’re not verified until you’re verified we can’t meet. How can you get verified if you can’t meet someone? I understand it’s probably a lot of scammers on here and people are wary. I just don’t know how to prove that I’m not one of them?"
You can get verified by someone in the chat rooms via webcam. |
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"Purely because there’s too many married men on here that falsely claim their wife knows- I would want to have a brief chat with her before hand."
May I ask how would you know it was his wife you were chatting to ?
He could have an obliging female friend. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"Purely because there’s too many married men on here that falsely claim their wife knows- I would want to have a brief chat with her before hand.
May I ask how would you know it was his wife you were chatting to ?
He could have an obliging female friend. "
LOL, not there’s something I never thought of, but don’t think I would even do. But you have a point. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"Never check, never ask. I do little talking before our meets.
I know I shouldn't and it's off topic but nice bum x"
I was thinking exactly the same thing. I’m glad you said it because I wasn’t sure if it was right tooor not LOL. |
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"Purely because there’s too many married men on here that falsely claim their wife knows- I would want to have a brief chat with her before hand.
May I ask how would you know it was his wife you were chatting to ?
He could have an obliging female friend. "
People will lie about anything to get laid.
But it doesn't mean you can't try to be true to your own moral code 💜 |
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"Purely because there’s too many married men on here that falsely claim their wife knows- I would want to have a brief chat with her before hand.
May I ask how would you know it was his wife you were chatting to ?
He could have an obliging female friend.
People will lie about anything to get laid.
But it doesn't mean you can't try to be true to your own moral code 💜"
Agreed you can always try |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"Also, I have contacted a couple of women on here who on their profile say married men go straight to the top but then they say you’re not verified until you’re verified we can’t meet. How can you get verified if you can’t meet someone? I understand it’s probably a lot of scammers on here and people are wary. I just don’t know how to prove that I’m not one of them?
You can get verified by someone in the chat rooms via webcam."
You see, I don’t know these things, but thanks for the advice. I mean with the wife staying out most nights at my daughters. I don’t know can WebCam on an iPad. I’m not sure? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"Purely because there’s too many married men on here that falsely claim their wife knows- I would want to have a brief chat with her before hand.
May I ask how would you know it was his wife you were chatting to ?
He could have an obliging female friend.
People will lie about anything to get laid.
But it doesn't mean you can't try to be true to your own moral code 💜"
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"Purely because there’s too many married men on here that falsely claim their wife knows- I would want to have a brief chat with her before hand.
May I ask how would you know it was his wife you were chatting to ?
He could have an obliging female friend.
You see how rubbish I am at this. I’ll keep posting without replying LOL. I like your style. I agree with your comments but I’m new to this and I’m not one of these people that lie about everything to get laid. Emma 😘 honest on my profile I’m honest in this forum I’m starting to think maybe this isn’t the right platform for me but I’ll give it another couple of months and see what happens thanks for your comment though I appreciate it
People will lie about anything to get laid.
But it doesn't mean you can't try to be true to your own moral code 💜"
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"...
So we spoke about it and she has told me to “go get it just don’t tell me about it” her words not mine so… I’m just wondering because it’s hard on here is there anyone out there that finds that a turn on?
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I'm in a similar boat, partnered with permission on a "don't ask don't tell" basis.
I have it on my profile.
It absolutely will put people off, but, I want to be open and honest.
So that's a loss I just have to take. "It is what it is."
No sense in lying about anything.
Not going to do any good in the long run and it's not fair deceiving people just for a shag.
I still manage to have fun. |
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"Also, I have contacted a couple of women on here who on their profile say married men go straight to the top but then they say you’re not verified until you’re verified we can’t meet. How can you get verified if you can’t meet someone? I understand it’s probably a lot of scammers on here and people are wary. I just don’t know how to prove that I’m not one of them?"
You could go along to an organised social event and get verified in person. Just an idea. |
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By *omRachCouple 2 weeks ago
Wirral |
"Some women prefer married men but they are difficult to find ,they like the fact you really are looking for NSA ."
We prefer 'attached' guys - purely for the reason that they're more likely to be discreet, also with hopefully less a chance of developing feelings. |
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OP just like anything in life you’ll get a variety of answers. The basic answer is some will be ok, some won’t.
My marriage is open, poly and currently also sexless due to a medical condition. However we didn’t open the marriage due to his condition, his condition only led to me joining here.
I’ve not found any resistance as my husband would be happy to chat to anyone and has in person attended an impromptu group social at a comicon and a recent munch. However if it was an issue for a potential partner then that would be a sign we weren’t going to be compatible and things wouldn’t progress further.
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"Purely because there’s too many married men on here that falsely claim their wife knows- I would want to have a brief chat with her before hand."
She doesn't want to be involved though so how would he get her to do that ?I think the person who said asking via this thread was maybe the wrong way to go just create a profile that sells you ,your wife has eased your conscience about it ,just be patient, thing about the forums is it gives people a chance to be a critic ,reality is some don't care that you are married. It makes it harder but not impossible.
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I wouldn't be interested if I couldn't speak to her and confirm she's happy for you to meet others.
There's just so many liars here and when I've asked to confirm it with their wife, silence.
My other half has my full permission to meet women and couples alone and I have happily spoken to those who've been interested in meeting him in the past. |
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"Purely because there’s too many married men on here that falsely claim their wife knows- I would want to have a brief chat with her before hand.She doesn't want to be involved though so how would he get her to do that ?I think the person who said asking via this thread was maybe the wrong way to go just create a profile that sells you ,your wife has eased your conscience about it ,just be patient, thing about the forums is it gives people a chance to be a critic ,reality is some don't care that you are married. It makes it harder but not impossible. "
How is it being critical when he’s asking us a question, looking for perspectives and we’re giving them? Of course there are women who get turned on by it, the same way that some women aren’t lol. |
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No. I don’t find people’s situations a turn on or a turn off. It’s the person for me. Having said that, I know this won’t be a popular opinion but Ive met people whose other halves don’t know. I won’t meet those where they do know. |
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By *B69Woman 2 weeks ago
Wiltshire |
"No. I don’t find people’s situations a turn on or a turn off. It’s the person for me. Having said that, I know this won’t be a popular opinion but Ive met people whose other halves don’t know. I won’t meet those where they do know. "
Ditto |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"No. I don’t find people’s situations a turn on or a turn off. It’s the person for me. Having said that, I know this won’t be a popular opinion but Ive met people whose other halves don’t know. I won’t meet those where they do know. "
Ah so you woman do exist then. Good to know |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"No. I don’t find people’s situations a turn on or a turn off. It’s the person for me. Having said that, I know this won’t be a popular opinion but Ive met people whose other halves don’t know. I won’t meet those where they do know.
Ditto"
Love the “Ditto” always reminds me of Ghost. Classic. |
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Neither a turn on or turn off.
If someone is married and their partner is A ok with everything then fab. If their partner isn’t aware then it isn’t for me.
Lots of people in the same boat as you OP. Hopefully you find someone similar to fill that need. Best of luck! X |
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By *a LunaWoman 2 weeks ago
South Wales |
OP, why don’t you try a swingers club? Not sure if there are any near you but it will likely be easier to find those who couldn’t give a hoot about your marital situation.
You rock up, enjoy the evening (however that pans out) and go home. |
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"Purely because there’s too many married men on here that falsely claim their wife knows- I would want to have a brief chat with her before hand.She doesn't want to be involved though so how would he get her to do that ?I think the person who said asking via this thread was maybe the wrong way to go just create a profile that sells you ,your wife has eased your conscience about it ,just be patient, thing about the forums is it gives people a chance to be a critic ,reality is some don't care that you are married. It makes it harder but not impossible.
How is it being critical when he’s asking us a question, looking for perspectives and we’re giving them? Of course there are women who get turned on by it, the same way that some women aren’t lol. "
I merely meant that a woman meeting him wouldn't be able to ask his wife and I guess you are being critical we all are to different degrees . |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"Neither a turn on or turn off.
If someone is married and their partner is A ok with everything then fab. If their partner isn’t aware then it isn’t for me.
Lots of people in the same boat as you OP. Hopefully you find someone similar to fill that need. Best of luck! X"
Thanks |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"OP, why don’t you try a swingers club? Not sure if there are any near you but it will likely be easier to find those who couldn’t give a hoot about your marital situation.
You rock up, enjoy the evening (however that pans out) and go home. "
I’m starting to explore that option. Thanks. |
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By *essaMayWoman 2 weeks ago
Fairytale Wood |
It is always of interest on how consent is achieved unless they are on here with with a profile.
Do people actually contact wives/partners to get that consent or do they provide a signed note.
"Excuse me your man said he has your permission to screw around, can you confirm that is correct so I can jump him" or do you just take them at their word?
I know there is for some, an excitement taking from from others or what others have. Maybe a an ego thing.
I know I would have got furious being contacted by women wanting to jump him, even though he did have my consent if he wanted too. |
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"It is always of interest on how consent is achieved unless they are on here with with a profile.
Do people actually contact wives/partners to get that consent or do they provide a signed note.
"Excuse me your man said he has your permission to screw around, can you confirm that is correct so I can jump him" or do you just take them at their word?
I know there is for some, an excitement taking from from others or what others have. Maybe a an ego thing.
I know I would have got furious being contacted by women wanting to jump him, even though he did have my consent if he wanted too."
Speaking just for myself, this is why I'd only choose partnered men if they have a joint profile or their partner is here too.
So its clear they do have permission, as I said earlier my partner meets alone and I'm more than happy to confirm it with anyone who he is looking to meet. |
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To be honest OP there's so many of these threads once you have been on here long enough you do get pretty cynical and take the "permission" statement with a pinch of salt.
From a personal point of view if my wife couldn't/doesn't want sex id put my love for her first and support her rather than my need to get my leg over, maybe I'm old fashioned but that's just how I feel.
Maybe I'm lucky having a wife who's open minded,this wasn't always the case she was very prudish and closed minded until one day she wasn't!
But I didn't seek sex elsewhere I just bashed my old fella and got on with being a faithful husband. |
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To all the married men on here with permission.
Are you happy to let your next meet have a quick chat with wife to confirm all is good?
From what I’m hearing. Lots of married men take not having a regular sex life at home, as permission to play away. |
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"Purely because there’s too many married men on here that falsely claim their wife knows- I would want to have a brief chat with her before hand.
May I ask how would you know it was his wife you were chatting to ?
He could have an obliging female friend. "
Or a burner phone. |
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"Purely because there’s too many married men on here that falsely claim their wife knows- I would want to have a brief chat with her before hand.
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May I ask how would you know it was his wife you were chatting to ?
He could have an obliging female friend. "
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It's best to get advice from the "too many married women" on here and enquire how they coax their husbands to speak to potential suitors before they engage in 'illicit' deeds.
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"It is always of interest on how consent is achieved unless they are on here with with a profile.
Do people actually contact wives/partners to get that consent or do they provide a signed note.
"Excuse me your man said he has your permission to screw around, can you confirm that is correct so I can jump him" or do you just take them at their word?
I know there is for some, an excitement taking from from others or what others have. Maybe a an ego thing.
I know I would have got furious being contacted by women wanting to jump him, even though he did have my consent if he wanted too.
Speaking just for myself, this is why I'd only choose partnered men if they have a joint profile or their partner is here too.
So its clear they do have permission, as I said earlier my partner meets alone and I'm more than happy to confirm it with anyone who he is looking to meet. "
I think there are some joint profiles where the female half has no idea she's on here |
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"It is always of interest on how consent is achieved unless they are on here with with a profile.
Do people actually contact wives/partners to get that consent or do they provide a signed note.
"Excuse me your man said he has your permission to screw around, can you confirm that is correct so I can jump him" or do you just take them at their word?
I know there is for some, an excitement taking from from others or what others have. Maybe a an ego thing.
I know I would have got furious being contacted by women wanting to jump him, even though he did have my consent if he wanted too.
Speaking just for myself, this is why I'd only choose partnered men if they have a joint profile or their partner is here too.
So its clear they do have permission, as I said earlier my partner meets alone and I'm more than happy to confirm it with anyone who he is looking to meet.
I think there are some joint profiles where the female half has no idea she's on here "
How would they be photo verified? |
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"It is always of interest on how consent is achieved unless they are on here with with a profile.
Do people actually contact wives/partners to get that consent or do they provide a signed note.
"Excuse me your man said he has your permission to screw around, can you confirm that is correct so I can jump him" or do you just take them at their word?
I know there is for some, an excitement taking from from others or what others have. Maybe a an ego thing.
I know I would have got furious being contacted by women wanting to jump him, even though he did have my consent if he wanted too.
Speaking just for myself, this is why I'd only choose partnered men if they have a joint profile or their partner is here too.
So its clear they do have permission, as I said earlier my partner meets alone and I'm more than happy to confirm it with anyone who he is looking to meet.
I think there are some joint profiles where the female half has no idea she's on here
How would they be photo verified?"
@ well I never, I agree. I'd avoid any I was suspicious of.
@pickle possibly did join as a couple at one point, she didn't want to carry on, but he has kept the profile going regardless and she doesnt know. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"To be honest OP there's so many of these threads once you have been on here long enough you do get pretty cynical and take the "permission" statement with a pinch of salt.
From a personal point of view if my wife couldn't/doesn't want sex id put my love for her first and support her rather than my need to get my leg over, maybe I'm old fashioned but that's just how I feel.
Maybe I'm lucky having a wife who's open minded,this wasn't always the case she was very prudish and closed minded until one day she wasn't!
But I didn't seek sex elsewhere I just bashed my old fella and got on with being a faithful husband."
This is what I have been doing, like I said originally it was her who said if you want it go and get it. So I’m exploring my options. I love and support my wife through everything and to suggest otherwise is a little offensive. But a desire to have sex is not something that I see as a choice but a natural animal instinct. Maybe it will go away one day but you are only on the earth once so why not live? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"To all the married men on here with permission.
Are you happy to let your next meet have a quick chat with wife to confirm all is good?
From what I’m hearing. Lots of married men take not having a regular sex life at home, as permission to play away. "
It’s not the lack of sexlife that gives me the permission it’s the words “go and get it” |
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Problem is some people lie to get what they want. Over 20 years around this lifestyle has made me extremely cynical.
we've heard some disgusting lies from men in order to get their leg over. So no we would definitely not go near married men unless we knew them as a couple. |
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By *abioMan 2 weeks ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"So I’m married have been for 11 years my wife has been taken Prozac for 15 years and her sex drive is completely gone mine however, is pretty much the same as it was when I was 16 and I’m literally fed up of masturbating all the time. I think I must’ve literally completed porn hub so I’ve decided to take the next step that’s why I’m here.So we spoke about it and she has told me to “go get it just don’t tell me about it” her words not mine so… I’m just wondering because it’s hard on here is there anyone out there that finds that a turn on? Also, my work takes me all over the country so if there’s anyone that’s really hot for a married man, let’s chat ladies only please I mean men can reply, but I wouldn’t meet a man."
The problem it’s that we only have your side of the “she doesn’t want to know “ …
I have played with one half of a couple, sometimes with them there.. sometimes without, but always spoken to the other half to make sure they are happy with the situation….
Because, with the greatest of respect, if you are here in effect behind the back of the person you are suppose to trust more than any other, then what else are you prepared to do! |
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"To be honest OP there's so many of these threads once you have been on here long enough you do get pretty cynical and take the "permission" statement with a pinch of salt.
From a personal point of view if my wife couldn't/doesn't want sex id put my love for her first and support her rather than my need to get my leg over, maybe I'm old fashioned but that's just how I feel.
Maybe I'm lucky having a wife who's open minded,this wasn't always the case she was very prudish and closed minded until one day she wasn't!
But I didn't seek sex elsewhere I just bashed my old fella and got on with being a faithful husband.
This is what I have been doing, like I said originally it was her who said if you want it go and get it. So I’m exploring my options. I love and support my wife through everything and to suggest otherwise is a little offensive. But a desire to have sex is not something that I see as a choice but a natural animal instinct. Maybe it will go away one day but you are only on the earth once so why not live? "
Do you honestly think your wife means it when she's said "go get it" ? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"So I’m married have been for 11 years my wife has been taken Prozac for 15 years and her sex drive is completely gone mine however, is pretty much the same as it was when I was 16 and I’m literally fed up of masturbating all the time. I think I must’ve literally completed porn hub so I’ve decided to take the next step that’s why I’m here.So we spoke about it and she has told me to “go get it just don’t tell me about it” her words not mine so… I’m just wondering because it’s hard on here is there anyone out there that finds that a turn on? Also, my work takes me all over the country so if there’s anyone that’s really hot for a married man, let’s chat ladies only please I mean men can reply, but I wouldn’t meet a man.
The problem it’s that we only have your side of the “she doesn’t want to know “ …
I have played with one half of a couple, sometimes with them there.. sometimes without, but always spoken to the other half to make sure they are happy with the situation….
Because, with the greatest of respect, if you are here in effect behind the back of the person you are suppose to trust more than any other, then what else are you prepared to do! "
Surely the easiest way to go about that though is to just not mention anything I mean why would I write in a forum about it? I appreciate everyone’s opinion though it’s actually nice to talk to some people about it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"To be honest OP there's so many of these threads once you have been on here long enough you do get pretty cynical and take the "permission" statement with a pinch of salt.
From a personal point of view if my wife couldn't/doesn't want sex id put my love for her first and support her rather than my need to get my leg over, maybe I'm old fashioned but that's just how I feel.
Maybe I'm lucky having a wife who's open minded,this wasn't always the case she was very prudish and closed minded until one day she wasn't!
But I didn't seek sex elsewhere I just bashed my old fella and got on with being a faithful husband.
This is what I have been doing, like I said originally it was her who said if you want it go and get it. So I’m exploring my options. I love and support my wife through everything and to suggest otherwise is a little offensive. But a desire to have sex is not something that I see as a choice but a natural animal instinct. Maybe it will go away one day but you are only on the earth once so why not live?
Do you honestly think your wife means it when she's said "go get it" ?"
Yes, 100% and that’s why she decided to stay around our daughter’s house since Friday and it wasn’t after an argument. It was a clear go and get it because you won’t get it here and then she stayed out for three days. It was a civil conversation we had not an argument like I said so yeah I do believe that’s what she meant But I appreciate you a lot. I’ve obviously been doing this a lot longer and also appreciate that you probably heard it all before so I’m not surprised by the comments. It was what I was expecting if I’m honest, but again, I appreciate them all. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"To be honest OP there's so many of these threads once you have been on here long enough you do get pretty cynical and take the "permission" statement with a pinch of salt.
From a personal point of view if my wife couldn't/doesn't want sex id put my love for her first and support her rather than my need to get my leg over, maybe I'm old fashioned but that's just how I feel.
Maybe I'm lucky having a wife who's open minded,this wasn't always the case she was very prudish and closed minded until one day she wasn't!
But I didn't seek sex elsewhere I just bashed my old fella and got on with being a faithful husband.
This is what I have been doing, like I said originally it was her who said if you want it go and get it. So I’m exploring my options. I love and support my wife through everything and to suggest otherwise is a little offensive. But a desire to have sex is not something that I see as a choice but a natural animal instinct. Maybe it will go away one day but you are only on the earth once so why not live?
Do you honestly think your wife means it when she's said "go get it" ?
Yes, 100% and that’s why she decided to stay around our daughter’s house since Friday and it wasn’t after an argument. It was a clear go and get it because you won’t get it here and then she stayed out for three days. It was a civil conversation we had not an argument like I said so yeah I do believe that’s what she meant But I appreciate you a lot. I’ve obviously been doing this a lot longer and also appreciate that you probably heard it all before so I’m not surprised by the comments. It was what I was expecting if I’m honest, but again, I appreciate them all."
That was meant to say I appreciate you lot have obviously been doing this a lot longer not I’ve been doing it longer. Predictive text can mess things up LOL. |
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I don’t really have an opinion as such, there are women out there who enjoy this. Something that helps me connect is changing location when I’m in different areas then putting up a status or a meet request.
Good luck OP.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 2 weeks ago
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"I don’t really have an opinion as such, there are women out there who enjoy this. Something that helps me connect is changing location when I’m in different areas then putting up a status or a meet request.
Good luck OP. "
Good advice and a Lovely comment thanks! South wales here I come  |
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However... I only play with hothusbands, whose wives have a hotwife account on here 
