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Getting back in touch
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By *IXEN200 OP Woman 3 weeks ago
newcastle upon tyne |
A question for you all.
Have you ever had someone who's gone quiet on you for months on end then all of a sudden out the blue messaged you asking if you're OK.
I'm baffled by the fact I've had a message like this but he's also now in a relationship with someone. I understand he could be genuinely asking if I'm ok but it's confusing me.
Any advice would be appreciated. |
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By *B69Woman 3 weeks ago
Wiltshire |
Yes I’ve had this happen, can’t really give you any advice as it’s depends on how the last msgs were between you, what sort of friendship it was.
I’ve had friends check in on me or they have left and come back |
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All the time, it's a pattern especially in men. Sometimes it's life and these things fizzle out and other times it's just them running out of options so going around the roster again. You have to respond based on if you think it's genuine or not, that's the only advice I can give. |
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By *IXEN200 OP Woman 3 weeks ago
newcastle upon tyne |
"My advice would be to reply if you feel it appropriate but keep it light and non committal. If you really want to know why he's contacted you ask him but it seems a bit odd to me"
I felt it odd too, thanks for the advice |
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By *IXEN200 OP Woman 3 weeks ago
newcastle upon tyne |
"Yes I’ve had this happen, can’t really give you any advice as it’s depends on how the last msgs were between you, what sort of friendship it was.
I’ve had friends check in on me or they have left and come back"
Our last messages were great, between us, I'll just have to see how things go. |
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"Bin. Block. Burn.
Put me second once I’ll put you last forever.
Can you do that if you really liked them?  "
I do. I don’t plant my crops in barren fields. Jesus I must sound cold! I’ve learned to call it if I’m getting bullshit and close it down. Life’s too short and happiness too fleeting to gamble on men who can’t get their own house in order. |
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By *IXEN200 OP Woman 3 weeks ago
newcastle upon tyne |
"No advice as I find it odd too and can be very embarrassing if you don't really remember them"
Well I can't forget this one, that's the trouble when we saw each other it was always great. I'm in a right quandary |
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"No advice as I find it odd too and can be very embarrassing if you don't really remember them
Well I can't forget this one, that's the trouble when we saw each other it was always great. I'm in a right quandary "
Then it depends if you want them in your life under these circumstances or if its too painful. |
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"A question for you all.
Have you ever had someone who's gone quiet on you for months on end then all of a sudden out the blue messaged you asking if you're OK.
I'm baffled by the fact I've had a message like this but he's also now in a relationship with someone. I understand he could be genuinely asking if I'm ok but it's confusing me.
Any advice would be appreciated."
If he went quite on you without reason I would give him a wide berth |
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I have,I even had someone contact me after 5 years before.
I think some just message old contacts when they aren't getting anywhere on here. Or when they're feeling nostalgic ie around new year time.
It depends on how we left last contact or why they're getting in touch, as to whether I respond or not. |
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By *IXEN200 OP Woman 3 weeks ago
newcastle upon tyne |
"A question for you all.
Have you ever had someone who's gone quiet on you for months on end then all of a sudden out the blue messaged you asking if you're OK.
I'm baffled by the fact I've had a message like this but he's also now in a relationship with someone. I understand he could be genuinely asking if I'm ok but it's confusing me.
Any advice would be appreciated.
If he went quite on you without reason I would give him a wide berth "
I had an inclination on why he went quiet |
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By (user no longer on site) 3 weeks ago
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I stay in touch with 2 people from my past, who I had a bit of a relationship with.
Just sounds like a nice guy to me, he must think of you and enjoyed the time you spent together. |
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By *IXEN200 OP Woman 3 weeks ago
newcastle upon tyne |
"I stay in touch with 2 people from my past, who I had a bit of a relationship with.
Just sounds like a nice guy to me, he must think of you and enjoyed the time you spent together. "
Thank you, he's very much a nice guy |
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By (user no longer on site) 3 weeks ago
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I can only speak for myself but if I've ever contacted a woman with whom sex was previously an option/possibility shortly after starting a new relationship it's because the relationship isn't necessarily working out and I'm keeping other options open.
It's up to you and your moral compass but I'd walk away personally. |
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By *IXEN200 OP Woman 3 weeks ago
newcastle upon tyne |
"I can only speak for myself but if I've ever contacted a woman with whom sex was previously an option/possibility shortly after starting a new relationship it's because the relationship isn't necessarily working out and I'm keeping other options open.
It's up to you and your moral compass but I'd walk away personally."
That scenario has entered my head for sure |
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I can be pretty crap keeping in touch with people, especially from mid-December. I find I've just got to get through Christmas, New Year and then I resurface after the anniversary of my brothers death and can look forward. |
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By *ornycougaWoman 3 weeks ago
Wherever I lay my hat |
"I can only speak for myself but if I've ever contacted a woman with whom sex was previously an option/possibility shortly after starting a new relationship it's because the relationship isn't necessarily working out and I'm keeping other options open.
It's up to you and your moral compass but I'd walk away personally."
This. Guys pop up again after months and years all the time because they have stumbled on my number or picture. Had one or two who were in relationships and my assumption was they were either bored and looking for something on the side, or were testing the water to see what might be available if they decided to jump ship. Personally, neither option is appealing to me. |
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Yes someone I was seeing about 2 year ago a few times nothing heavy, but he went quiet after a few months, I didn't think much of it i let it be,
but just before Xmas he added me on Facebook I've known him since I was little so I didn't mind, we've chatted since he wants to see me, but again he's going quiet, because he's an old friend it's kind of annoying tbh not sure what to make of it |
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By *IXEN200 OP Woman 3 weeks ago
newcastle upon tyne |
"Yes someone I was seeing about 2 year ago a few times nothing heavy, but he went quiet after a few months, I didn't think much of it i let it be,
but just before Xmas he added me on Facebook I've known him since I was little so I didn't mind, we've chatted since he wants to see me, but again he's going quiet, because he's an old friend it's kind of annoying tbh not sure what to make of it"
That's a tough one, it drives me mad when friends have gone quiet |
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