FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Can you crush a narcissist?
Can you crush a narcissist?
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By *hagTonight OP Man 4 weeks ago
From the land of haribos. |
I read an interesting article about narcissists, did you know that narcissists like to insult a person in public, especially in front of others? The reason they do it is because you arent prepared for it and you dont know how to reply to it.
It mentioned some tactics that one can use, like, the key is be prepared and a good reply to them if it happens is with "but that was terrible rude" it seems that this reply have a quite interesting effect on them.
But of course, generally the best way to crush them is to live as happily as possible and as well to block them on social media, because the less contact you have with them, the better it is, they crave attention.
What is your view about it, can one crush a narcissist, have you done it and what way did you use?  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Might be semantics but I don't think you can crush tgem, I just think you can win for yourself.
Narcissists want you to react so they can claim to be the victim so staying calm and quiet cheats them of their prize. If you can do that, so they're behaviour is exposed, then you'll win your peace. When you move on, they'll simply carry on with a new victim. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Might be semantics but I don't think you can crush tgem, I just think you can win for yourself.
Narcissists want you to react so they can claim to be the victim so staying calm and quiet cheats them of their prize. If you can do that, so they're behaviour is exposed, then you'll win your peace. When you move on, they'll simply carry on with a new victim."
I theory I totally agree. I moved on, they found a new victim but they still tried over the next twenty years to exact revenge on me leaving them. It's mentally exhausting but it didn't break me, it's made me the strong person I am today! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Might be semantics but I don't think you can crush tgem, I just think you can win for yourself.
Narcissists want you to react so they can claim to be the victim so staying calm and quiet cheats them of their prize. If you can do that, so they're behaviour is exposed, then you'll win your peace. When you move on, they'll simply carry on with a new victim.
In theory I totally agree. I moved on, they found a new victim but they still tried over the next twenty years to exact revenge on me leaving them. It's mentally exhausting but it didn't break me, it's made me the strong person I am today! "
I love your focus on the positive outcome and I think that's all you can do.
They don't stop
It's your fault in their eyes
They paint you as the villain to anyone that'll listen
They believe what they're told because their minds are too small
They latch on to the 1 or 2 times you snapped and forget the 100 or 200 things they did to get you to snap
So it's your fault
And you're moving on is sooo unreasonable and selfish
You're the narcissist for being so selfish
But you moved on
You healed
You got stronger
You found your happiness
Love it...
"The peace I have without you in my life is worth me being the villain in your story..."
💪🫂🫶 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *hagTonight OP Man 4 weeks ago
From the land of haribos. |
"Tbh Shag. With all the potential stalking and drama they could bring to my life. I'd rather just cut and run as soon as I see the flags. Life's too short to engage with toxic people."
Hi christabellend, yes, you are right there, cut and run as soon as you see the flags, would be the best thing for it too |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
As has been said, I'm not sure it's possible to crush a narcissist, but I suppose it depends what you mean by "crush"? Emotionally break them? Publicly humiliate them by revealing their narcissism for all to see? Any such attempt would be seen by them as a direct challenge and would probably result in a furious and sustained campaign against you.
I think the only thing you can do is to try and escape from them...and one of the best ways of doing that is to put as much distance as possible between you and them - physically, emotionally and technologically (e.g. social media, email, messaging, etc). They feed off controlling and belittling their victims, so denying them the opportunity to do this will starve them.
If you successfully manage to achieve this (and it is hard), then sadly they will most likely move on to someone else...but at least you will have survived! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
When considering how to cope with someone who has a personality disorder with strong dissociality traits characterised by self-centredness and a lack of empathy I would ask my self: what do I hope to achieve through continuing to engage with giving them space in my own mind?
Anger is a powerful emotion, and has an important function in setting boundaries, but crushing someone isn't quite the same thing. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Not sure agree about narcissists putting partners down in public.
My lady friends ex was a narcissist but he be nasty verbally and later on with fist. But always behind closed doors in public front family friends would be polite chatting and everyone thought perfect husband dad etc |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Not sure agree about narcissists putting partners down in public.
My lady friends ex was a narcissist but he be nasty verbally and later on with fist. But always behind closed doors in public front family friends would be polite chatting and everyone thought perfect husband dad etc "
Same as my ex. Public face he was charming and would do anything for anyone. Behind closed doors was a different story |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Not sure agree about narcissists putting partners down in public.
My lady friends ex was a narcissist but he be nasty verbally and later on with fist. But always behind closed doors in public front family friends would be polite chatting and everyone thought perfect husband dad etc
Same as my ex. Public face he was charming and would do anything for anyone. Behind closed doors was a different story "
Take it you got away from ex ok now
Friends ex had to have court order keeping him away.
He then choose to never see kids again as told had to see them under supervision. It was his way or nothing |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Not sure agree about narcissists putting partners down in public.
My lady friends ex was a narcissist but he be nasty verbally and later on with fist. But always behind closed doors in public front family friends would be polite chatting and everyone thought perfect husband dad etc
Same as my ex. Public face he was charming and would do anything for anyone. Behind closed doors was a different story
Take it you got away from ex ok now
Friends ex had to have court order keeping him away.
He then choose to never see kids again as told had to see them under supervision. It was his way or nothing "
Yeah, have a fantastic new husband and a whole new life. Ex rears his head now and again making threats but he doesn't know where we are |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I read an interesting article about narcissists, did you know that narcissists like to insult a person in public, especially in front of others? The reason they do it is because you arent prepared for it and you dont know how to reply to it.
It mentioned some tactics that one can use, like, the key is be prepared and a good reply to them if it happens is with "but that was terrible rude" it seems that this reply have a quite interesting effect on them.
But of course, generally the best way to crush them is to live as happily as possible and as well to block them on social media, because the less contact you have with them, the better it is, they crave attention.
What is your view about it, can one crush a narcissist, have you done it and what way did you use? "
On here no because they tend to have followers who back them up ,clever little barstardoes . |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Might be semantics but I don't think you can crush tgem, I just think you can win for yourself.
Narcissists want you to react so they can claim to be the victim so staying calm and quiet cheats them of their prize. If you can do that, so they're behaviour is exposed, then you'll win your peace. When you move on, they'll simply carry on with a new victim.
In theory I totally agree. I moved on, they found a new victim but they still tried over the next twenty years to exact revenge on me leaving them. It's mentally exhausting but it didn't break me, it's made me the strong person I am today!
I love your focus on the positive outcome and I think that's all you can do.
They don't stop
It's your fault in their eyes
They paint you as the villain to anyone that'll listen
They believe what they're told because their minds are too small
They latch on to the 1 or 2 times you snapped and forget the 100 or 200 things they did to get you to snap
So it's your fault
And you're moving on is sooo unreasonable and selfish
You're the narcissist for being so selfish
But you moved on
You healed
You got stronger
You found your happiness
Love it...
"The peace I have without you in my life is worth me being the villain in your story..."
💪🫂🫶"
Pretty much spot on apart from I never snapped or argued. Just wasn't worth the violent outbreak that could follow.
The last paragraph is definitely how I have always felt 👌 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Might be semantics but I don't think you can crush tgem, I just think you can win for yourself.
Narcissists want you to react so they can claim to be the victim so staying calm and quiet cheats them of their prize. If you can do that, so they're behaviour is exposed, then you'll win your peace. When you move on, they'll simply carry on with a new victim.
In theory I totally agree. I moved on, they found a new victim but they still tried over the next twenty years to exact revenge on me leaving them. It's mentally exhausting but it didn't break me, it's made me the strong person I am today!
I love your focus on the positive outcome and I think that's all you can do.
They don't stop
It's your fault in their eyes
They paint you as the villain to anyone that'll listen
They believe what they're told because their minds are too small
They latch on to the 1 or 2 times you snapped and forget the 100 or 200 things they did to get you to snap
So it's your fault
And you're moving on is sooo unreasonable and selfish
You're the narcissist for being so selfish
But you moved on
You healed
You got stronger
You found your happiness
Love it...
"The peace I have without you in my life is worth me being the villain in your story..."
💪🫂🫶
Pretty much spot on apart from I never snapped or argued. Just wasn't worth the violent outbreak that could follow.
The last paragraph is definitely how I have always felt 👌"
It's a lesson I learned, that fighting back was a mistake, but I'm a firey redhead (under the grey) and she knew my buttons.
Once the lesson was learned it was easier to bite my lip. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Just tell them to get fucked
Problem is then they tend to come after you.
I’ve had it at work and outside of work. "
Trouble is when coming after people , they may find themselves on a quiet spot with no one around and accidentally bump into my fist a few times |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Walk away.
Don't talk
Don't cry
Don't react.
Rebuild you life better and stronger
Then one day after the hurt and pain has gone. Your the best version of yourself.
Fuvk it's hard and evil work.
But gets easier.
If your lucky you get to watch there life fall apart and sit back and feel sorry for them.
If anyone is stuck and feels isolated, just drop me a pm and all I do is listen.
As sometime that all it takes.
Be strong and crush them with your unbelievable strength 💪 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Walk away.
Don't talk
Don't cry
Don't react.
Rebuild you life better and stronger
Then one day after the hurt and pain has gone. Your the best version of yourself.
Fuvk it's hard and evil work.
But gets easier.
If your lucky you get to watch there life fall apart and sit back and feel sorry for them.
If anyone is stuck and feels isolated, just drop me a pm and all I do is listen.
As sometime that all it takes.
Be strong and crush them with your unbelievable strength 💪 "
This x 1000. Thank you OP for starting the thread, there are some amazing posts on it (and some very accurate observations, no doubt borne of awful experience), but total thank you above poster for this post. Yes it is hard work!
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *hagTonight OP Man 3 weeks ago
From the land of haribos. |
"Walk away.
Don't talk
Don't cry
Don't react.
Rebuild you life better and stronger
Then one day after the hurt and pain has gone. Your the best version of yourself.
Fuvk it's hard and evil work.
But gets easier.
If your lucky you get to watch there life fall apart and sit back and feel sorry for them.
If anyone is stuck and feels isolated, just drop me a pm and all I do is listen.
As sometime that all it takes.
Be strong and crush them with your unbelievable strength 💪
This x 1000. Thank you OP for starting the thread, there are some amazing posts on it (and some very accurate observations, no doubt borne of awful experience), but total thank you above poster for this post. Yes it is hard work!
"
Yes, yw, it is an interesting topic too |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
