FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you get put off by receiving to meet when the person has put a meet/event up on their profile?
Do you get put off by receiving to meet when the person has put a meet/event up on their profile?
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Does it seem like they want to meet just cos they're horny and not because they want to fuck You?
For me it gives off the same vibe as a copy/paste message that you can tell that you're just one of a lot of people they've approached |
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By (user no longer on site) 12 weeks ago
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They may post that they're free, but they definitely still have their preferences. Just because they post they're free right now doesn't mean they're desperate, just available |
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By (user no longer on site) 12 weeks ago
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"They may post that they're free, but they definitely still have their preferences. Just because they post they're free right now doesn't mean they're desperate, just available"
This. I've put meet up in the last and probably will do again when I have a free evening and no plans. I'm still picky as fuck.
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By (user no longer on site) 12 weeks ago
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"They may post that they're free, but they definitely still have their preferences. Just because they post they're free right now doesn't mean they're desperate, just available
This. I've put meet up in the last and probably will do again when I have a free evening and no plans. I'm still picky as fuck.
"
Past even. CBA to type it all again |
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I think if I’d been chatting with them, they knew that I wanted to meet them and they put a meet up, I’d be put off. To me that says that they’d rather meet a randomer than the person they’d be chatting with and take it as rejection.
If they wanted to meet me, they’d ask me and let me knew when they’re free |
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I don’t like it. I was possibly going to meet somebody next week.. but he put a random meet request today… I’d like to think that this man was looking forward to what could have arisen in just a few more days 🤷♂️ |
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No not at all, none of us are exclusive and we are all happy to share each other with other partners. Especially since our time is limited and say they want to meet midweek and I'm off meeting other people. It doesn't make anyone of us less important to each other  |
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"I don’t like it. I was possibly going to meet somebody next week.. but he put a random meet request today… I’d like to think that this man was looking forward to what could have arisen in just a few more days 🤷♂️"
I don't like it because I want someone to message me cos they want to fuck Me not just a fuck in general but it wouldn't bother me if they met someone after or before me |
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By (user no longer on site) 12 weeks ago
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"I think if I’d been chatting with them, they knew that I wanted to meet them and they put a meet up, I’d be put off. To me that says that they’d rather meet a randomer than the person they’d be chatting with and take it as rejection.
If they wanted to meet me, they’d ask me and let me knew when they’re free"
I can see this, sometimes for me I just want someone that doesn't know me or have expectations. |
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"I think if I’d been chatting with them, they knew that I wanted to meet them and they put a meet up, I’d be put off. To me that says that they’d rather meet a randomer than the person they’d be chatting with and take it as rejection.
If they wanted to meet me, they’d ask me and let me knew when they’re free
I can see this, sometimes for me I just want someone that doesn't know me or have expectations. "
Yea I hear that. And it's always nice to meet someone new |
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"It's one of those site features I don't really use. I guess much depends on the person and my frame of mind at the time.
It's really not something I want to overthink "
I don't have a problem with people that use the feature. I just don't like receiving a message and when you go look at the profile you see that it's up and makes me wonder who else have they messaged before me? If that makes sense |
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I've put meet requests on before and ended up meeting no one because no one who messaged seemed worth the effort lol. To me it's more of a "free and open to meeting" not "desperate for a shag from anyone". |
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"I've put meet requests on before and ended up meeting no one because no one who messaged seemed worth the effort lol. To me it's more of a "free and open to meeting" not "desperate for a shag from anyone"."
Fair point and surprised you didn't get any messages! |
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"I've put meet requests on before and ended up meeting no one because no one who messaged seemed worth the effort lol. To me it's more of a "free and open to meeting" not "desperate for a shag from anyone".
Fair point and surprised you didn't get any messages!"
Lol I got messages. Just no one who I felt I decent vibe from. And that's fine, but I like to be able to talk to people and hold a conversation first if they're going to be touching my private parts lol |
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Interesting take on it. There are people that I'd like to meet that post "meet nows". It doesn't bother me, probably because I'm not available to arrange anything right now. If I was in your boat where I did have time, then possibly yes, I'd be a bit peeved.
I've only ever used that feature once, sometimes last week I think. I didn't mean to press the bloody thing but still got pestered about it  |
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Okay. I thought this was about someone putting a meet now up while they claimed to be excited to meet you but weren't arranging anything. That's a bit rubbish, but context and blah.
Is the actual question just about someone who is messaging you for the first time while they have a meet up?
Because, uh, I don't really see how that affects anything. |
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If I’m building the anticipation for a first time play meet with a new friend, I would be pretty gutted if they listed a meet now for a play session before our meet, and yes, it would put me off meeting them.
Nobody is exclusive in here it’s true, but if we have a meet arranged, and she finds she has some spare time a day or two before, I would hope she would be asking me first, if we could move our date forward….  |
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"Okay. I thought this was about someone putting a meet now up while they claimed to be excited to meet you but weren't arranging anything. That's a bit rubbish, but context and blah.
Is the actual question just about someone who is messaging you for the first time while they have a meet up?
Because, uh, I don't really see how that affects anything."
For me its like if you want to meet just cos you got free time and you put a meet up it's like 1st come 1st serve or you weighting your options
And I want someone to message me cos they specifically want to meet me |
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By (user no longer on site) 12 weeks ago
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"Okay. I thought this was about someone putting a meet now up while they claimed to be excited to meet you but weren't arranging anything. That's a bit rubbish, but context and blah.
Is the actual question just about someone who is messaging you for the first time while they have a meet up?
Because, uh, I don't really see how that affects anything.
For me its like if you want to meet just cos you got free time and you put a meet up it's like 1st come 1st serve or you weighting your options
And I want someone to message me cos they specifically want to meet me"
Most people on here won't specifically want one other person. The amount of messages asking to meet now is annoying. I say I can't then that's as far as the conversation goes and they go meet someone else. They won't even try to arrange for another time or try talking about anything else. No one on here cares about the other person |
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"For me its like if you want to meet just cos you got free time and you put a meet up it's like 1st come 1st serve or you weighting your options
And I want someone to message me cos they specifically want to meet me"
Weighing options isn't a bad thing. I'd rather someone weighed their options and picked me with some thought rather than on pure impulse.
If someone is initiating contact with you then they want to talk to or meet you. The content of the messages says a lot more than whether they've got a meet posted. If it's just "Hey wuu2" then it's deleted before I look at the profile to know if they've posted a meet.
If I got an interesting message from someone who happened to have a meet up, it wouldn't bother me. |
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I'd expect someone who's fairly bright and eager to achieve their goals here, to use the available site tools to reasonable effect. This would include the meet posting option. I use it and it doesn't necessarily mean that I'll meet anyone or even that day.
It's better to not make many assumptions and just to treat people as individuals. |
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I quite like the 'meet today' button - if I'm in the mood and CBA to drive to a club, I'll put a meet today up and see who comes on radar. Often it will be a friend or someone I've been planning to meet who will see I'm free and we can get together. Sometimes it's a newbie who is up for cracking straight on with a drink rather than wanting to message for ages.
Using the meet today function on fab is way easier than individually messaging every friend/playmate/person I might fancy. I've not got time for admin generally, even loss so when I'm horny 🤣
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"I quite like the 'meet today' button - if I'm in the mood and CBA to drive to a club, I'll put a meet today up and see who comes on radar. Often it will be a friend or someone I've been planning to meet who will see I'm free and we can get together. Sometimes it's a newbie who is up for cracking straight on with a drink rather than wanting to message for ages.
Using the meet today function on fab is way easier than individually messaging every friend/playmate/person I might fancy. I've not got time for admin generally, even loss so when I'm horny 🤣
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This is what I use it for too! Not in an 'I'll fuck whoever responds way' more as aninvite if any of my friends, previous meets or potentials are free too! |
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"I quite like the 'meet today' button - if I'm in the mood and CBA to drive to a club, I'll put a meet today up and see who comes on radar. Often it will be a friend or someone I've been planning to meet who will see I'm free and we can get together. Sometimes it's a newbie who is up for cracking straight on with a drink rather than wanting to message for ages.
Using the meet today function on fab is way easier than individually messaging every friend/playmate/person I might fancy. I've not got time for admin generally, even loss so when I'm horny 🤣
This is what I use it for too! Not in an 'I'll fuck whoever responds way' more as aninvite if any of my friends, previous meets or potentials are free too!"
This is a very good point, it’s not an open invitation, you still can be selective, it’s just a way of notifying an interest |
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This is what I use it for too! Not in an 'I'll fuck whoever responds way' more as aninvite if any of my friends, previous meets or potentials are free too!
This is a very good point, it’s not an open invitation, you still can be selective, it’s just a way of notifying an interest"
And in that vein, I really don't understand why people get grumpy/jealous when someone they might be planning to meet in the future posts a 'meet today' - just message and say you're free today too so lets get it on! And if you're not free to meet today, let them get on with enjoying themselves with someone who is! |
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"Does it seem like they want to meet just cos they're horny and not because they want to fuck You?
For me it gives off the same vibe as a copy/paste message that you can tell that you're just one of a lot of people they've approached "
Dear Aunty Jane,
Please help me. I joined a site where people are looking for other people to have sex with.
There are no strings attached to the sex, I mean I don't have to be exclusively anyone's and they don't have to be mine. It's pretty much non binding , guilt free fucks all round. Cos like I say Aunty Jane, it's not DATING - yuk fuck no! It's Swinging - you know the non jealous non traditional type of sex stuff with a bit of kink here n there.
Here's my problem Jane. Someone I plan to meet with from the above site put up a call to meet !!! I was devastated. How could they? They are meeting me! ME!!
It's put me off a bit. I won't lie. I mean, we had texted and everything.
I thought they just wanted to fuck me and no one else. That's the way things work isn't it ?
I feel i've been lied to, used as a pawn in their attempts to actually SWING!!
What the fuck is the matter with people Jane. I'm defeated, down , this person has broken all the promises and dreams I made for myself.
Give me the answers Jane so that I can learn to be blind, judgemental and full of naive shock once more.
Thanks |
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"Does it seem like they want to meet just cos they're horny and not because they want to fuck You?
For me it gives off the same vibe as a copy/paste message that you can tell that you're just one of a lot of people they've approached "
I've never used that facility either to post a meet or to respond to one.
Some people obviously use it as a handy way of alerting friends or those they are already chatting to that they are free.
Others use it as an alternative to saying "I'm in your area".
Either way it's not something I'm interested in so it doesn't affect me. |
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"Does it seem like they want to meet just cos they're horny and not because they want to fuck You?
For me it gives off the same vibe as a copy/paste message that you can tell that you're just one of a lot of people they've approached "
Seems like it does for you.....
Mr |
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This is what I use it for too! Not in an 'I'll fuck whoever responds way' more as aninvite if any of my friends, previous meets or potentials are free too!
This is a very good point, it’s not an open invitation, you still can be selective, it’s just a way of notifying an interest
And in that vein, I really don't understand why people get grumpy/jealous when someone they might be planning to meet in the future posts a 'meet today' - just message and say you're free today too so lets get it on! And if you're not free to meet today, let them get on with enjoying themselves with someone who is! "
this this this! I've really noticed a possessiveness this time around on fab. If you are free too great message them. If you aren't it just means they are in the mood that day too- it doesn't mean they have stopped being interested in you xx |
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"I think if I’d been chatting with them, they knew that I wanted to meet them and they put a meet up, I’d be put off. To me that says that they’d rather meet a randomer than the person they’d be chatting with and take it as rejection.
If they wanted to meet me, they’d ask me and let me knew when they’re free"
Agreed 👍 |
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"Does it seem like they want to meet just cos they're horny and not because they want to fuck You?
For me it gives off the same vibe as a copy/paste message that you can tell that you're just one of a lot of people they've approached "
Ooh please your on a swingers site, guess what that comes with a lot of no strings attached sex...
This sounds like it's about you rather, than anybody else who uses the 'meet me now' option...
Mr |
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"Does it seem like they want to meet just cos they're horny and not because they want to fuck You?
For me it gives off the same vibe as a copy/paste message that you can tell that you're just one of a lot of people they've approached "
I think most of us are just one of many people who have been approached. 😊 |
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"I don’t like it. I was possibly going to meet somebody next week.. but he put a random meet request today… I’d like to think that this man was looking forward to what could have arisen in just a few more days 🤷♂️"
Why would that put you off... if you wanted to meet next week?
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"Does it seem like they want to meet just cos they're horny and not because they want to fuck You?
For me it gives off the same vibe as a copy/paste message that you can tell that you're just one of a lot of people they've approached
I think most of us are just one of many people who have been approached. 😊"
I don’t think many people use this site to look for “the one”. And to focus all your attention on just one potential meet and ignore others who are interested sounds counterintuitive to me.
The whole point is you’re horny. We wouldn’t want to meet a guy that wasn’t horny. |
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I can never understand people that join sites like this and they don't seem to understand the concept.
I know not everyone here is a swinger but the majority of people that join are after some kind of no strings uncomplicated meet ups. Whatever that may be that suits them.
I don't see the issue with people putting meets up if their horny that's been going on for years it's called one night stands.
If someone is due to meet you it's a bit naive to expect them to live like a nun until their meet with you. |
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By (user no longer on site) 12 weeks ago
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I guess it depends if you had that convo that you will be exclusive until the meet?
If you didn't, then fair game, its a swingers site.
If you did, well you know where you stand now and its your choice to continue or walk away |
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"I guess it depends if you had that convo that you will be exclusive until the meet?
If you didn't, then fair game, its a swingers site.
If you did, well you know where you stand now and its your choice to continue or walk away "
I can't see anyone agreeing to be exclusive before a meet. I know if a guy had ever expected that of me before I'd have laughed.
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