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By *IXEN200 OP Woman 3 weeks ago
newcastle upon tyne |
Do people have a limit of how long from first communication to actually deciding to meet them if it feels right.
I was once told by a lovely man I met that if he hasn't met withing two weeks you never are going to meet.
Clarification for me would be helpful when and if I decide to get back into meeting. |
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The shortest time period for me has been about three weeks from the initial message. Typically, however it's at least a month to months, to a year and yesterday, I met with someone with whom I first started chatting 4 years ago. She was worth it. |
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We've people we've messaged for months, years on and off and never met, sometimes life, work and other commitments don't align easily.
I do get bored of endless small talk I must admit but I'm not a daily messger it's not for me.
Mrs |
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By *eliWoman 3 weeks ago
. |
No I don't. It's whatever feels right isn't it? From when I first started messaging a partner to actually meeting him the first time? And not chickening out  ...
Eight years. I perhaps wouldn't do that with everyone but when things feel right and the timing works, that's when you go for it. I like a slow burn. Evidently. |
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It took me 2 years to meet one man, because he was away with work and I do regular shifts and he wasn't local to me.
When I was meeting, the time has varied, I've met some within a couple of weeks and others not for a few months.
Go with what feels right for you and don't let anyone else dictate/pressure how quickly you should be meeting them. |
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By *arnelianWoman 3 weeks ago
Ely/Cambridge - between the two |
In the past, I've met within a couple of days if we've talked loads and had at least a phone call. Now, I prefer to get to know them a bit more first. There is no right or wrong, it's whatever feels right for you. |
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By *IXEN200 OP Woman 3 weeks ago
newcastle upon tyne |
Thank you so much for all the input, I'll be digesting it all.
I think me personally likes to get to know someone and as has been said not a time waster but I also feel that some take me as being a time waster which is not the case.
I have to be sure within myself it's for me. |
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By *jonesMan 3 weeks ago
Plymouth |
"Thank you so much for all the input, I'll be digesting it all.
I think me personally likes to get to know someone and as has been said not a time waster but I also feel that some take me as being a time waster which is not the case.
I have to be sure within myself it's for me."
Obviously it can just be a social ..it's often difficult to know someone by texting. Chatting tends to Peter out and die in my experience but I have met people at socials ...after years of chatting ..  |
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Generally I prefer time to get to know if I actually think it's worth meeting someone.
There's been times where I've had a social with 24 hours of the first message, but that was a rarity while I was between jobs and actually single, juggling current workload and partners means I'm probably needing to book that kind of time for a first social at least a couple of weeks in advance, and that's only after I've decided I definitely do want to meet someone.
There are people I've spoken to for over a year before the stars aligned for us to actually meet in person.
Everyone is different. The more you worry about it and place your own arbitrary restrictions on it the less likely you are to find people with compatible time frames 💜 |
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"Do people have a limit of how long from first communication to actually deciding to meet them if it feels right.
I was once told by a lovely man I met that if he hasn't met withing two weeks you never are going to meet.
Clarification for me would be helpful when and if I decide to get back into meeting."
Personally when it feels right for all parties involved |
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By (user no longer on site) 3 weeks ago
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We are planning on meeting one dude we have been chatting to on fab for about 8-9 months.
Getting everything to align with kids, work and stuff is a struggle. |
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By *ffy.Woman 3 weeks ago
Fife |
No, not really. I think the longest was 2 years from the initial message until we met. Sometimes life gets in the way, schedules don’t align and so many other reasons. If I like them enough, I’m willing to wait until the time is right. |
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By *weetRollMan 3 weeks ago
Angus/Dundee/Perth |
Genuinely curious, what are people tal_ing about for months or years?
Do you start tal_ing about each others family, work, politics and aspirations? Like how sensitive do the topics get before you're comfortable with a meet?
It shouldn't take long to learn about someone's general interests, right...?
|
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If I’m getting along with someone I don’t mind how long a meet takes providing the arrangements suit us both 😁
Patience is a virtue 😉
And anyone who demanded a meet would join my ever growing block list 😂😂😂 |
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"Genuinely curious, what are people tal_ing about for months or years?
Do you start tal_ing about each others family, work, politics and aspirations? Like how sensitive do the topics get before you're comfortable with a meet?
It shouldn't take long to learn about someone's general interests, right...?"
•
It is not what people are tal_ing about that excessively prolongs the chats and inhibits the desire to meet. There are multitude of factors which include, amongst other things, logistics, childcare commitments, The Fåb Curse™, reticence due to commitments made with other people, the ebb and flow of superficial chats which fizzle out and then reincarnate at a later date, priorities, change of circumstances (e.g. she's now shacked up thus looking to pursue at a later date, or no longer attached and is more amenable to a meet) and change of preferences and criteria, or perhaps the chats started off with a view of being friends and then blossomed into something more...
When I've chatted to someone for years and years I didn't become chaste and focus solely on that person, remaining 'virginal' just for her; I still carried on regardless meeting other people as per the natural course of my Fab journey...until the stars aligned and mågïç finally happened. |
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"Genuinely curious, what are people tal_ing about for months or years?
Do you start tal_ing about each others family, work, politics and aspirations? Like how sensitive do the topics get before you're comfortable with a meet?
It shouldn't take long to learn about someone's general interests, right...?
•
It is not what people are tal_ing about that excessively prolongs the chats and inhibits the desire to meet. There are multitude of factors which include, amongst other things, logistics, childcare commitments, The Fåb Curse™, reticence due to commitments made with other people, the ebb and flow of superficial chats which fizzle out and then reincarnate at a later date, priorities, change of circumstances (e.g. she's now shacked up thus looking to pursue at a later date, or no longer attached and is more amenable to a meet) and change of preferences and criteria, or perhaps the chats started off with a view of being friends and then blossomed into something more...
When I've chatted to someone for years and years I didn't become chaste and focus solely on that person, remaining 'virginal' just for her; I still carried on regardless meeting other people as per the natural course of my Fab journey...until the stars aligned and mågïç finally happened."
Was gonna reply but this man summed it all up quite nicely.
I'd only add that it's quite nice to know that there are people out there who will, when it all lines up just right, be happy to pick things up where they were last left off. |
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By *weetRollMan 3 weeks ago
Angus/Dundee/Perth |
"Genuinely curious, what are people tal_ing about for months or years?
Do you start tal_ing about each others family, work, politics and aspirations? Like how sensitive do the topics get before you're comfortable with a meet?
It shouldn't take long to learn about someone's general interests, right...?
•
It is not what people are tal_ing about that excessively prolongs the chats and inhibits the desire to meet. There are multitude of factors which include, amongst other things, logistics, childcare commitments, The Fåb Curse™, reticence due to commitments made with other people, the ebb and flow of superficial chats which fizzle out and then reincarnate at a later date, priorities, change of circumstances (e.g. she's now shacked up thus looking to pursue at a later date, or no longer attached and is more amenable to a meet) and change of preferences and criteria, or perhaps the chats started off with a view of being friends and then blossomed into something more...
When I've chatted to someone for years and years I didn't become chaste and focus solely on that person, remaining 'virginal' just for her; I still carried on regardless meeting other people as per the natural course of my Fab journey...until the stars aligned and mågïç finally happened."
Your answer provided a lot of clarity, thank you. |
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By *weetRollMan 3 weeks ago
Angus/Dundee/Perth |
"Genuinely curious, what are people tal_ing about for months or years?
Do you start tal_ing about each others family, work, politics and aspirations? Like how sensitive do the topics get before you're comfortable with a meet?
It shouldn't take long to learn about someone's general interests, right...?
•
It is not what people are tal_ing about that excessively prolongs the chats and inhibits the desire to meet. There are multitude of factors which include, amongst other things, logistics, childcare commitments, The Fåb Curse™, reticence due to commitments made with other people, the ebb and flow of superficial chats which fizzle out and then reincarnate at a later date, priorities, change of circumstances (e.g. she's now shacked up thus looking to pursue at a later date, or no longer attached and is more amenable to a meet) and change of preferences and criteria, or perhaps the chats started off with a view of being friends and then blossomed into something more...
When I've chatted to someone for years and years I didn't become chaste and focus solely on that person, remaining 'virginal' just for her; I still carried on regardless meeting other people as per the natural course of my Fab journey...until the stars aligned and mågïç finally happened.
Was gonna reply but this man summed it all up quite nicely.
I'd only add that it's quite nice to know that there are people out there who will, when it all lines up just right, be happy to pick things up where they were last left off."
 |
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By *IXEN200 OP Woman 3 weeks ago
newcastle upon tyne |
Lots of reading and getting things in my head, I understand everyone is different and it's within a time that works well for both parties.
Thank you for all the input and it sure clarified things up |
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For a social, soon. I don’t want a penpal and if they are local I want to meet them to see if there is the mutual desire to rip each others clothes off.
Though there are exceptions and there’s people on here I’ve chatted on and off to for months or even years where life has got in the way and we haven’t met yet.
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