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Men - how to get laid

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By (user no longer on site) OP    15 weeks ago

1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

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By *uperSalopian7Man 15 weeks ago

Shrewsbury

Damn already failed at number 1

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By *ampireLoveMan 15 weeks ago

Essex & Bristol

I failed on number 1 and 2 🤦🏽‍♂️🤦🏽‍♂️🤷🏽‍♂️

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By *ir tootMan 15 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

Oof I'm well fucked on the first

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By *ommo83Man 15 weeks ago

Salford


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

You make it sound so easy

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By *.T.Man 15 weeks ago

Glasgow

Good advice +1

Do I not need a huge checklist of other things though?

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By (user no longer on site) OP    15 weeks ago

Everybody is attractive to someone!

So I keep telling myself.

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By (user no longer on site) 15 weeks ago

Nah... It's easier than that.

Turn 'fab straight'.

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By (user no longer on site) 15 weeks ago

Dammit only 1 our of 2

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By *ustamanMan 15 weeks ago

weymouth

Well 1 is subjective but on past evidence I'm not.

2 probably so that's buggered me anyway

I give up

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By *ir tootMan 15 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent


"Everybody is attractive to someone!

So I keep telling myself. "

Your hair, sorry is it me or did you dye it?

Black and white is dope.

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By (user no longer on site) OP    15 weeks ago


"Everybody is attractive to someone!

So I keep telling myself.

Your hair, sorry is it me or did you dye it?

Black and white is dope.

"

This place turned me grey

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By *illy IdolMan 15 weeks ago

Midlands

✅️

✅️

✅️

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By *ir tootMan 15 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent


"Everybody is attractive to someone!

So I keep telling myself.

Your hair, sorry is it me or did you dye it?

Black and white is dope.

This place turned me grey"

Ohhhh, that makes sense yup.

You got the fabgrey.

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By *r TriomanMan 15 weeks ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

Women, how to get laid:

Have a pulse 😂

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By *Jblue321Man 15 weeks ago

Chester


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

This ain’t wrong short and sweet and to the point

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By *.T.Man 15 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Women, how to get laid:

Have a pulse 😂"

For some guys, that would be optional on here...

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By *ir tootMan 15 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent


"Women, how to get laid:

Have a pulse 😂

For some guys, that would be optional on here..."

You know that is probably true, in name only though.

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By *uterspace1978Man 15 weeks ago

Bexley

Crawl inside a giant chicken?

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By *ir tootMan 15 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent


"Women, how to get laid:

Have a pulse 😂

For some guys, that would be optional on here...

You know that is probably true, in name only though. "

Ooh boy just now noticed what I said oops.

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By *esthetic21Man 15 weeks ago

Birmingham/Bristol

Be a roll of carpet

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By *hrek101Man 15 weeks ago

Herts

So basically I have no chance 🤦🏽‍♂️🤷🏽‍♂️

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By *all-ladMan 15 weeks ago

rotherham

That's a bit bitchy you could say girls 3 ways to get laid actually that doesn't work enough desperate people on here we will take anything. Put a dress on the kitchen sink I'd be happy

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By *agic.MMan 14 weeks ago

Orpington

Finally an honest (non politically correct) thread about it . Now let's determine what an attractive man looks like

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By *carlet SeductionWoman 14 weeks ago

Maidstone


"Women, how to get laid:

Have a pulse 😂"

Great. I definitely have one of those but I don't see them queuing up. Maybe I'm doing it wrong?

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By *asha86Couple 14 weeks ago

walsall

In no particular order...

Have good banter

Be honest and upfront

Dress well

Smell good

Know a dick pic is not a good opener

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By *he AmbassadorMan 14 weeks ago

IRLANDA. / Prague. / Cil Dara


"In no particular order...

Have good banter

Be honest and upfront

Dress well

Smell good

Know a dick pic is not a good opener

"

well I smell good. I tick 1 box at least lol

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By *eroLondonMan 14 weeks ago

Mayfair


"In no particular order...

Have good banter: ✔️

Be honest and upfront: ✔️

Dress well: ✔️

Smell good: ✔️

Know a dick pic is not a good opener: 🆗 ✔️

"

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By *ou only live onceMan 14 weeks ago

London


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

This thread is easier than the other one. I'll do this one.

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By *opeyXWoman 14 weeks ago

Dundee


"Women, how to get laid:

Have a pulse 😂

For some guys, that would be optional on here..."

👀

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By *JB1954Man 14 weeks ago

Reading


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

My opinion to this. Attractive ? Does not have to be Brad Pitt , George Clooney in looks. Not gym fit , 6 pack

Main thing I have noticed is male has to be confident.

Not bothered about rejection.

Then can chat , make females laugh feel at ease . ?

If rejected try again with another female.

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By *ags73Man 14 weeks ago

glasgow-ish


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

Sigh. If only it were so easy.

I try at 1., usually good at 2, but sadly not so much on the dick wetting.

Bit of a pity as I’d give a good ride. 😕

One day my princess will appear..

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By *lder budweiserMan 14 weeks ago

Stirlingshire

If you're 1 you don't even need to have 2 for some people on here

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By *ongandharderMan 14 weeks ago

Rotherham

I do try

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By *echnosonic_BrummieMan 14 weeks ago

Willenhall


"

2. Don't be a total dickhead

"

Does that mean being "a bit of a dickhead" is OK?

Asking for a friend...

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple 14 weeks ago

Leeds

Kick her in the minge and drag it in a bush 👍🏻

The mr

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By *ustincider888Man 14 weeks ago

Preston Ish

I failed both points so much that I can't even get my dick wet in the bath

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By *issolvedOrdersMan 14 weeks ago

Bristol

Yeah I was out after point 1. 🤷‍♂️

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By (user no longer on site) 14 weeks ago

I belive this:-

1. Be the best version of yourself

2. Be nice

3. Always dress and smell good

Your welcome 🙂

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By *issolvedOrdersMan 14 weeks ago

Bristol


"I belive this:-

1. Be the best version of yourself

2. Be nice

3. Always dress and smell good

Your welcome 🙂"

This is a more realistic version

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By (user no longer on site) 14 weeks ago

I seem to fail at whatever version of point 1 is posted.

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By *cott14Man 14 weeks ago

Essex & SW Exeter/Taunton

Damn it ….. I hate science 🤷‍♂️

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By *phrodisiac2000Man 14 weeks ago

diggle


"Damn it ….. I hate science 🤷‍♂️"

It’s so complicated

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By *olden PoleMan 14 weeks ago

London


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

And remember too smile and put on a happy face.

"

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By *ungandMan 14 weeks ago

daveyhulme

I’ve ticked all the boxes

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By *ungandMan 14 weeks ago

daveyhulme


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

Thanks for the tips

"

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By *ubikslongswordMan 14 weeks ago

Rubiksville

I'll add one

3 If you're not attractive because funny

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By (user no longer on site) OP    14 weeks ago


"Women, how to get laid:

Have a pulse 😂

For most guys, that would be optional on here..."

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By (user no longer on site) OP    14 weeks ago


"Finally an honest (non politically correct) thread about it . Now let's determine what an attractive man looks like "

Shit,I'm meant to be PC on here? Uh oh....

You just need to be attractive to the person you're trying to get your dick wet with.

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By (user no longer on site) OP    14 weeks ago


"In no particular order...

Have good banter

Be honest and upfront

Dress well

Smell good

Know a dick pic is not a good opener

"

Don't use the word banter, definitely not "bants"

Greasy mechanic types are acceptable

If it's a pretty penis, it's a good opener

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By *he National ThrustMan 14 weeks ago

West Sussex

Have biscuits.

Don't use the phrase "Get Laid", ladies much prefer the term "Smoochy bonky groany bunk up"

Wear Spongebob boxers.

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By (user no longer on site) 14 weeks ago

And here I thought the only tip was just be yourself 🤷‍♂️

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By *avexxMan 14 weeks ago

cheshire

men how to get laid... in all good book stores from today

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By (user no longer on site) 14 weeks ago


"And here I thought the only tip was just be yourself 🤷‍♂️"

Yeah funny that. But simultaneously improve/change yourself.

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By *iss.BellaWoman 14 weeks ago

Chester


"

My opinion to this. Attractive ? Does not have to be Brad Pitt , George Clooney in looks. Not gym fit , 6 pack

Main thing I have noticed is male has to be confident.

Not bothered about rejection.

Then can chat , make females laugh feel at ease . ?

If rejected try again with another female. "

Hit the nail on the head

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By *obilebottomMan 14 weeks ago

All over

If only I was 'free now?'

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By *iddle ManMan 14 weeks ago

Walsall

Not much we can do about 1, and for a lot of people they seem to go out of their way to strike out on number 2.

1. You can do all you can, clean, well groomed, dress great but if someone isn't attracted to you, then it's probably not going to happen.

2. It's far easier to not be a dickehead, surely.

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By *oxy RedWoman 14 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Kick her in the minge and drag it in a bush 👍🏻

The mr "

You had me wet at the word 'kick' 😜

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By *oxy RedWoman 14 weeks ago

Glasgow

If you open a door for me and then slap my ass as I walk past and wink at me as I look back...🙌🏻 easy 🤣

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By *ohn.Wick.Man 14 weeks ago

The Continental

It works for me

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By (user no longer on site) OP    14 weeks ago


"And here I thought the only tip was just be yourself 🤷‍♂️"

This won't work for the boring ones though

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By *agic.MMan 14 weeks ago

Orpington


"If you open a door for me and then slap my ass as I walk past and wink at me as I look back...🙌🏻 easy 🤣"

You sure that's not sexual assault?

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By (user no longer on site) OP    14 weeks ago


"If you open a door for me and then slap my ass as I walk past and wink at me as I look back...🙌🏻 easy 🤣

You sure that's not sexual assault?"

Depends if the guys hot or not.

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS 14 weeks ago

chichester


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

You next off have a decent size cock and have a personality not based off of Andrew Tates war room

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By *ulieScrumptiousWoman 14 weeks ago

North West


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

Most accurate thread ever.

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS 14 weeks ago

chichester

Left not next ffs. Auto correct on iPhones boil my nans kettle

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By *ir tootMan 14 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

Andrew tate? Err the amount of guys at my old job who turned on for me saying I dislike was was crazy 🤣.

You next off have a decent size cock and have a personality not based off of Andrew Tates war room "

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By *inky_couple2020Couple 14 weeks ago

North West


"And here I thought the only tip was just be yourself 🤷‍♂️"

Just the tip can sometimes be acceptable.

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By *ercury oneMan 14 weeks ago

Chippenham

Number 1, that's me out!

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS 14 weeks ago

chichester

[Removed by poster at 27/10/24 09:42:27]

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By *ir tootMan 14 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent

Why did my message go in the middle..

I'm too tired today

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By *tephanie63Woman 14 weeks ago

BRIDGWATER


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

That's a bit shallow, that's just what you seek. Some females have standards and don't drop their knickers just because a man is attractive. Sometimes being attractive can make a man arrogant. Men are so much more than just looks.

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By *ora the explorerWoman 14 weeks ago

Paradise, Herts


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

That's a bit shallow, that's just what you seek. Some females have standards and don't drop their knickers just because a man is attractive. Sometimes being attractive can make a man arrogant. Men are so much more than just looks.

"

She is shallow. No standards at all that one.

I feel like apologising on behalf of women to be honest.

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By (user no longer on site) OP    14 weeks ago


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

That's a bit shallow, that's just what you seek. Some females have standards and don't drop their knickers just because a man is attractive. Sometimes being attractive can make a man arrogant. Men are so much more than just looks.

"

Yes, I'm shallow.

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By *agic.MMan 14 weeks ago

Orpington


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

That's a bit shallow, that's just what you seek. Some females have standards and don't drop their knickers just because a man is attractive. Sometimes being attractive can make a man arrogant. Men are so much more than just looks.

"

What is shallow about it? Would you have sex with a man you don't find physically or sexually attractive? Also the word "dickhead " is an umbrella term that can make reference to many negative adjectives (arrogant, vain, rude disrespectful, ignorant, bigoted...) so how is it not accurate ? Men might be more than just looks in your personal life...but on Fab I'm not so sure we are ( dozens of messages from women focusing just on my looks makes me sceptical)

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By *ea monkeyMan 14 weeks ago

Manchester (he/him)

One out of two is ok, right?

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By *wist my nipplesCouple 14 weeks ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"One out of two is ok, right? "

Depends which one it is.

Mrs TMN x

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By *ea monkeyMan 14 weeks ago

Manchester (he/him)


"One out of two is ok, right?

Depends which one it is.

Mrs TMN x"

Well I’m not a dickhead

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman 14 weeks ago

Carlisle usually


"One out of two is ok, right?

Depends which one it is.

Mrs TMN x

Well I’m not a dickhead"

Fuck off trying to claim you're not the other one Tea 💜

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By *ulieScrumptiousWoman 14 weeks ago

North West


"One out of two is ok, right?

Depends which one it is.

Mrs TMN x

Well I’m not a dickhead

Fuck off trying to claim you're not the other one Tea 💜"

🤣👏

I think he's in need of a little light objectification!

Tea, you're definitely attractive, and not a dickhead. How's the getting laid going?

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman 14 weeks ago

Carlisle usually


"One out of two is ok, right?

Depends which one it is.

Mrs TMN x

Well I’m not a dickhead

Fuck off trying to claim you're not the other one Tea 💜

🤣👏

I think he's in need of a little light objectification!

Tea, you're definitely attractive, and not a dickhead. How's the getting laid going? "

When was the last time you slept alone not through choice or work based circumstances Tea?

(You sexy fuck) 💜

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By *inger_SnapWoman 14 weeks ago

Hampshire/Dorset

That's far too much to ask of them 😂

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By *wist my nipplesCouple 14 weeks ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"One out of two is ok, right?

Depends which one it is.

Mrs TMN x

Well I’m not a dickhead

Fuck off trying to claim you're not the other one Tea 💜

🤣👏

I think he's in need of a little light objectification!

Tea, you're definitely attractive, and not a dickhead. How's the getting laid going?

When was the last time you slept alone not through choice or work based circumstances Tea?

(You sexy fuck) 💜"

Don’t be shy now, Tea

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By *hunkygent88Man 14 weeks ago

hull

Im fucked at number 1

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By *opinovMan 14 weeks ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

Peasants - how not to starve.

1. Eat cake.

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By *cotlad178Man 14 weeks ago

falkirk

I'm out of the race nowhere near one.

Two I hope I'm not either. Hope I'm kind instead

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By *lack beauty 35Woman 14 weeks ago

West midlands


"I failed both points so much that I can't even get my dick wet in the bath "
you make me wet

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By *ark742024Man 14 weeks ago

Cheshire


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

Reminds me of a message I once got “why aren’t you more attractive?”

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By *he Silver FuxMan 14 weeks ago

Uttoxeter


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

🤦🏻‍♂️It’s so simple, what idiots we’ve all been

#wombsplaining

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By *NormalMan01Man 14 weeks ago

Harrogate


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

0/2 ain’t bad…

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By *ea monkeyMan 14 weeks ago

Manchester (he/him)


"One out of two is ok, right?

Depends which one it is.

Mrs TMN x

Well I’m not a dickhead

Fuck off trying to claim you're not the other one Tea 💜

🤣👏

I think he's in need of a little light objectification!

Tea, you're definitely attractive, and not a dickhead. How's the getting laid going?

When was the last time you slept alone not through choice or work based circumstances Tea?

(You sexy fuck) 💜

Don’t be shy now, Tea "

I feel attacked.

No. Smug. I feel smug

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By *HUSH-Man 14 weeks ago

London

Instructions unclear.

Dick caught in ceiling fan 🍆 😩

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By *ustym30Man 14 weeks ago

Swinton

Well that’s me out of it lol

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By *ust want fun 888Man 14 weeks ago

nearby

Tried everything else so looked at this thread, I’m a lost cause I think

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By *JB1954Man 14 weeks ago

Reading


"

My opinion to this. Attractive ? Does not have to be Brad Pitt , George Clooney in looks. Not gym fit , 6 pack

Main thing I have noticed is male has to be confident.

Not bothered about rejection.

Then can chat , make females laugh feel at ease . ?

If rejected try again with another female.

Hit the nail on the head "

I have noticed on various similar topics. Reply's from males saying they can go out any weekend and ‘pull’ a female. ( Have penetrative sex every weekend ) ?

My thought to that is are they in dream world. Yes possibly get a ‘date’ if lucky but not sex every weekend.

That is why on Fab even more so will not get a meet due to ratio of males , females

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By *mf123Man 14 weeks ago

with one foot out the door

You just click your fingers the fonz told me so

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By (user no longer on site) 14 weeks ago


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

Perfectly put 👌🏻

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By *moothdickMan 14 weeks ago

stoke


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

That's a bit shallow, that's just what you seek. Some females have standards and don't drop their knickers just because a man is attractive. Sometimes being attractive can make a man arrogant. Men are so much more than just looks.

Yes, I'm shallow. "

I’m a pool attended at the shallow end

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