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Men - how to get laid

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By *aven. OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Not the North West...

1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

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By *uperSalopian7Man 4 weeks ago

Shrewsbury

Damn already failed at number 1

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By *ampireLoveMan 4 weeks ago

Essex & Bristol

I failed on number 1 and 2 🤦🏽‍♂️🤦🏽‍♂️🤷🏽‍♂️

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By *ir Toot of the frostMan 4 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

Oof I'm well fucked on the first

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By *ommo83Man 4 weeks ago

Salford


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

You make it sound so easy

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By *.T.Man 4 weeks ago

Belfast

Good advice +1

Do I not need a huge checklist of other things though?

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By *aven. OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Not the North West...

Everybody is attractive to someone!

So I keep telling myself.

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By (user no longer on site) 4 weeks ago

Nah... It's easier than that.

Turn 'fab straight'.

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By *ah HumbugMan 4 weeks ago

here and there

Dammit only 1 our of 2

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By *ustamanMan 4 weeks ago

weymouth

Well 1 is subjective but on past evidence I'm not.

2 probably so that's buggered me anyway

I give up

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By *ir Toot of the frostMan 4 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent


"Everybody is attractive to someone!

So I keep telling myself. "

Your hair, sorry is it me or did you dye it?

Black and white is dope.

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By *aven. OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Not the North West...


"Everybody is attractive to someone!

So I keep telling myself.

Your hair, sorry is it me or did you dye it?

Black and white is dope.

"

This place turned me grey

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By *illy IdolMan 4 weeks ago

Midlands

✅️

✅️

✅️

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By *ir Toot of the frostMan 4 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent


"Everybody is attractive to someone!

So I keep telling myself.

Your hair, sorry is it me or did you dye it?

Black and white is dope.

This place turned me grey"

Ohhhh, that makes sense yup.

You got the fabgrey.

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By *r TriomanMan 4 weeks ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

Women, how to get laid:

Have a pulse 😂

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By *Jblue321Man 4 weeks ago

Chester


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

This ain’t wrong short and sweet and to the point

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By *.T.Man 4 weeks ago

Belfast


"Women, how to get laid:

Have a pulse 😂"

For some guys, that would be optional on here...

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By *ir Toot of the frostMan 4 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent


"Women, how to get laid:

Have a pulse 😂

For some guys, that would be optional on here..."

You know that is probably true, in name only though.

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By *uterspace1978Man 4 weeks ago

Bexley

Crawl inside a giant chicken?

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By *ir Toot of the frostMan 4 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent


"Women, how to get laid:

Have a pulse 😂

For some guys, that would be optional on here...

You know that is probably true, in name only though. "

Ooh boy just now noticed what I said oops.

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By *esthetic21Man 4 weeks ago

Birmingham/Bristol

Be a roll of carpet

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By *hrek101Man 4 weeks ago

Herts

So basically I have no chance 🤦🏽‍♂️🤷🏽‍♂️

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By *all-ladMan 4 weeks ago

rotherham

That's a bit bitchy you could say girls 3 ways to get laid actually that doesn't work enough desperate people on here we will take anything. Put a dress on the kitchen sink I'd be happy

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By *agic.MMan 3 weeks ago

Orpington

Finally an honest (non politically correct) thread about it . Now let's determine what an attractive man looks like

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By *carlet SeductionWoman 3 weeks ago

Maidstone


"Women, how to get laid:

Have a pulse 😂"

Great. I definitely have one of those but I don't see them queuing up. Maybe I'm doing it wrong?

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By *asha86Couple 3 weeks ago

walsall

In no particular order...

Have good banter

Be honest and upfront

Dress well

Smell good

Know a dick pic is not a good opener

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By *he AmbassadorMan 3 weeks ago

IRLANDA. / Prague. / Cil Dara


"In no particular order...

Have good banter

Be honest and upfront

Dress well

Smell good

Know a dick pic is not a good opener

"

well I smell good. I tick 1 box at least lol

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By *eroLondonMan 3 weeks ago

Covent Garden


"In no particular order...

Have good banter: ✔️

Be honest and upfront: ✔️

Dress well: ✔️

Smell good: ✔️

Know a dick pic is not a good opener: 🆗 ✔️

"

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By *ou only live onceMan 3 weeks ago

London


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

This thread is easier than the other one. I'll do this one.

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By *opeyXWoman 3 weeks ago

Dun Dee


"Women, how to get laid:

Have a pulse 😂

For some guys, that would be optional on here..."

👀

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By *JB1954Man 3 weeks ago

Reading


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

My opinion to this. Attractive ? Does not have to be Brad Pitt , George Clooney in looks. Not gym fit , 6 pack

Main thing I have noticed is male has to be confident.

Not bothered about rejection.

Then can chat , make females laugh feel at ease . ?

If rejected try again with another female.

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By *agnar73Man 3 weeks ago

glasgow-ish


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

Sigh. If only it were so easy.

I try at 1., usually good at 2, but sadly not so much on the dick wetting.

Bit of a pity as I’d give a good ride. 😕

One day my princess will appear..

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By *yzykMan 3 weeks ago

Stirlingshire

If you're 1 you don't even need to have 2 for some people on here

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By *ongandharderMan 3 weeks ago

Rotherham

I do try

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By *echnosonic_BrummieMan 3 weeks ago

Willenhall


"

2. Don't be a total dickhead

"

Does that mean being "a bit of a dickhead" is OK?

Asking for a friend...

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple 3 weeks ago

Leeds

Kick her in the minge and drag it in a bush 👍🏻

The mr

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By *ustincider888Man 3 weeks ago

Preston Ish

I failed both points so much that I can't even get my dick wet in the bath

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By *issolvedOrdersMan 3 weeks ago

Bristol

Yeah I was out after point 1. 🤷‍♂️

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By (user no longer on site) 3 weeks ago

I belive this:-

1. Be the best version of yourself

2. Be nice

3. Always dress and smell good

Your welcome 🙂

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By *issolvedOrdersMan 3 weeks ago

Bristol


"I belive this:-

1. Be the best version of yourself

2. Be nice

3. Always dress and smell good

Your welcome 🙂"

This is a more realistic version

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By (user no longer on site) 3 weeks ago

I seem to fail at whatever version of point 1 is posted.

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By *cott14Man 3 weeks ago

Essex & SW Exeter/Taunton

Damn it ….. I hate science 🤷‍♂️

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By *phrodisiac2000Man 3 weeks ago

blazing Saddleworth


"Damn it ….. I hate science 🤷‍♂️"

It’s so complicated

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By *olden PoleMan 3 weeks ago

Kent


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

And remember too smile and put on a happy face.

"

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By *ungandMan 3 weeks ago

daveyhulme

I’ve ticked all the boxes

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By *ungandMan 3 weeks ago

daveyhulme


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

Thanks for the tips

"

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By *ubikslongswordMan 3 weeks ago

East Grinstead

I'll add one

3 If you're not attractive because funny

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By *aven. OP   Woman 3 weeks ago

Not the North West...


"Women, how to get laid:

Have a pulse 😂

For most guys, that would be optional on here..."

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By *aven. OP   Woman 3 weeks ago

Not the North West...


"Finally an honest (non politically correct) thread about it . Now let's determine what an attractive man looks like "

Shit,I'm meant to be PC on here? Uh oh....

You just need to be attractive to the person you're trying to get your dick wet with.

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By *aven. OP   Woman 3 weeks ago

Not the North West...


"In no particular order...

Have good banter

Be honest and upfront

Dress well

Smell good

Know a dick pic is not a good opener

"

Don't use the word banter, definitely not "bants"

Greasy mechanic types are acceptable

If it's a pretty penis, it's a good opener

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By *he National ThrustMan 3 weeks ago

Horsham, Sussex

Have biscuits.

Don't use the phrase "Get Laid", ladies much prefer the term "Smoochy bonky groany bunk up"

Wear Spongebob boxers.

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By *im_1878Man 3 weeks ago

Formby

And here I thought the only tip was just be yourself 🤷‍♂️

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By *avexxMan 3 weeks ago

cheshire

men how to get laid... in all good book stores from today

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By (user no longer on site) 3 weeks ago


"And here I thought the only tip was just be yourself 🤷‍♂️"

Yeah funny that. But simultaneously improve/change yourself.

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By *iss.Bella.Woman 3 weeks ago

Wales


"

My opinion to this. Attractive ? Does not have to be Brad Pitt , George Clooney in looks. Not gym fit , 6 pack

Main thing I have noticed is male has to be confident.

Not bothered about rejection.

Then can chat , make females laugh feel at ease . ?

If rejected try again with another female. "

Hit the nail on the head

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By *obilebottomMan 3 weeks ago

All over

If only I was 'free now?'

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By *iddle ManMan 3 weeks ago

Walsall

Not much we can do about 1, and for a lot of people they seem to go out of their way to strike out on number 2.

1. You can do all you can, clean, well groomed, dress great but if someone isn't attracted to you, then it's probably not going to happen.

2. It's far easier to not be a dickehead, surely.

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By *oxy RedWoman 3 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Kick her in the minge and drag it in a bush 👍🏻

The mr "

You had me wet at the word 'kick' 😜

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By *oxy RedWoman 3 weeks ago

Glasgow

If you open a door for me and then slap my ass as I walk past and wink at me as I look back...🙌🏻 easy 🤣

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By *r John WickMan 3 weeks ago

The Continental

It works for me

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By *aven. OP   Woman 3 weeks ago

Not the North West...


"And here I thought the only tip was just be yourself 🤷‍♂️"

This won't work for the boring ones though

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By *agic.MMan 3 weeks ago

Orpington


"If you open a door for me and then slap my ass as I walk past and wink at me as I look back...🙌🏻 easy 🤣"

You sure that's not sexual assault?

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By *aven. OP   Woman 3 weeks ago

Not the North West...


"If you open a door for me and then slap my ass as I walk past and wink at me as I look back...🙌🏻 easy 🤣

You sure that's not sexual assault?"

Depends if the guys hot or not.

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS 3 weeks ago

chichester


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

You next off have a decent size cock and have a personality not based off of Andrew Tates war room

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By *ulieScrumptiousWoman 3 weeks ago

North West


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

Most accurate thread ever.

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS 3 weeks ago

chichester

Left not next ffs. Auto correct on iPhones boil my nans kettle

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By *ir Toot of the frostMan 3 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

Andrew tate? Err the amount of guys at my old job who turned on for me saying I dislike was was crazy 🤣.

You next off have a decent size cock and have a personality not based off of Andrew Tates war room "

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By *inky_couple2020Couple 3 weeks ago

North West


"And here I thought the only tip was just be yourself 🤷‍♂️"

Just the tip can sometimes be acceptable.

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By *ercury oneMan 3 weeks ago

Chippenham

Number 1, that's me out!

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS 3 weeks ago

chichester

[Removed by poster at 27/10/24 09:42:27]

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By *ir Toot of the frostMan 3 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent

Why did my message go in the middle..

I'm too tired today

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By *tephanie63Woman 3 weeks ago

BRIDGWATER


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

That's a bit shallow, that's just what you seek. Some females have standards and don't drop their knickers just because a man is attractive. Sometimes being attractive can make a man arrogant. Men are so much more than just looks.

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By *ora the explorerWoman 3 weeks ago

Paradise, Herts


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

That's a bit shallow, that's just what you seek. Some females have standards and don't drop their knickers just because a man is attractive. Sometimes being attractive can make a man arrogant. Men are so much more than just looks.

"

She is shallow. No standards at all that one.

I feel like apologising on behalf of women to be honest.

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By *aven. OP   Woman 3 weeks ago

Not the North West...


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

That's a bit shallow, that's just what you seek. Some females have standards and don't drop their knickers just because a man is attractive. Sometimes being attractive can make a man arrogant. Men are so much more than just looks.

"

Yes, I'm shallow.

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By *agic.MMan 3 weeks ago

Orpington


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

That's a bit shallow, that's just what you seek. Some females have standards and don't drop their knickers just because a man is attractive. Sometimes being attractive can make a man arrogant. Men are so much more than just looks.

"

What is shallow about it? Would you have sex with a man you don't find physically or sexually attractive? Also the word "dickhead " is an umbrella term that can make reference to many negative adjectives (arrogant, vain, rude disrespectful, ignorant, bigoted...) so how is it not accurate ? Men might be more than just looks in your personal life...but on Fab I'm not so sure we are ( dozens of messages from women focusing just on my looks makes me sceptical)

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By *ea monkeyMan 3 weeks ago

Manchester (he/him)

One out of two is ok, right?

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By *wist my nipplesCouple 3 weeks ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"One out of two is ok, right? "

Depends which one it is.

Mrs TMN x

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By *ea monkeyMan 3 weeks ago

Manchester (he/him)


"One out of two is ok, right?

Depends which one it is.

Mrs TMN x"

Well I’m not a dickhead

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman 3 weeks ago

Carlisle usually


"One out of two is ok, right?

Depends which one it is.

Mrs TMN x

Well I’m not a dickhead"

Fuck off trying to claim you're not the other one Tea 💜

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By *ulieScrumptiousWoman 3 weeks ago

North West


"One out of two is ok, right?

Depends which one it is.

Mrs TMN x

Well I’m not a dickhead

Fuck off trying to claim you're not the other one Tea 💜"

🤣👏

I think he's in need of a little light objectification!

Tea, you're definitely attractive, and not a dickhead. How's the getting laid going?

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman 3 weeks ago

Carlisle usually


"One out of two is ok, right?

Depends which one it is.

Mrs TMN x

Well I’m not a dickhead

Fuck off trying to claim you're not the other one Tea 💜

🤣👏

I think he's in need of a little light objectification!

Tea, you're definitely attractive, and not a dickhead. How's the getting laid going? "

When was the last time you slept alone not through choice or work based circumstances Tea?

(You sexy fuck) 💜

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By *imi_RougeWoman 3 weeks ago

Portsmouth

That's far too much to ask of them 😂

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By *wist my nipplesCouple 3 weeks ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"One out of two is ok, right?

Depends which one it is.

Mrs TMN x

Well I’m not a dickhead

Fuck off trying to claim you're not the other one Tea 💜

🤣👏

I think he's in need of a little light objectification!

Tea, you're definitely attractive, and not a dickhead. How's the getting laid going?

When was the last time you slept alone not through choice or work based circumstances Tea?

(You sexy fuck) 💜"

Don’t be shy now, Tea

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By *hunkygent88Man 3 weeks ago

hull

Im fucked at number 1

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By *opinovMan 3 weeks ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

Peasants - how not to starve.

1. Eat cake.

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By *cotlad178Man 3 weeks ago

falkirk

I'm out of the race nowhere near one.

Two I hope I'm not either. Hope I'm kind instead

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By *lack beauty 35Woman 3 weeks ago

South west


"I failed both points so much that I can't even get my dick wet in the bath "
you make me wet

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By *ark742024Man 3 weeks ago

Cheshire


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

Reminds me of a message I once got “why aren’t you more attractive?”

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By *he Silver FuxMan 3 weeks ago

Uttoxeter


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

🤦🏻‍♂️It’s so simple, what idiots we’ve all been

#wombsplaining

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By *NormalMan01Man 3 weeks ago

Harrogate


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

0/2 ain’t bad…

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By *ea monkeyMan 3 weeks ago

Manchester (he/him)


"One out of two is ok, right?

Depends which one it is.

Mrs TMN x

Well I’m not a dickhead

Fuck off trying to claim you're not the other one Tea 💜

🤣👏

I think he's in need of a little light objectification!

Tea, you're definitely attractive, and not a dickhead. How's the getting laid going?

When was the last time you slept alone not through choice or work based circumstances Tea?

(You sexy fuck) 💜

Don’t be shy now, Tea "

I feel attacked.

No. Smug. I feel smug

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By *HUSH-Man 3 weeks ago

London

Instructions unclear.

Dick caught in ceiling fan 🍆 😩

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By *ustym30Man 3 weeks ago

Swinton

Well that’s me out of it lol

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By *ust want fun 888Man 3 weeks ago

nearby

Tried everything else so looked at this thread, I’m a lost cause I think

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By *JB1954Man 3 weeks ago

Reading


"

My opinion to this. Attractive ? Does not have to be Brad Pitt , George Clooney in looks. Not gym fit , 6 pack

Main thing I have noticed is male has to be confident.

Not bothered about rejection.

Then can chat , make females laugh feel at ease . ?

If rejected try again with another female.

Hit the nail on the head "

I have noticed on various similar topics. Reply's from males saying they can go out any weekend and ‘pull’ a female. ( Have penetrative sex every weekend ) ?

My thought to that is are they in dream world. Yes possibly get a ‘date’ if lucky but not sex every weekend.

That is why on Fab even more so will not get a meet due to ratio of males , females

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By *mf123Man 3 weeks ago

with one foot out the door

You just click your fingers the fonz told me so

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By *urious135Man 3 weeks ago

brighton


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

"

Perfectly put 👌🏻

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By *moothdickMan 3 weeks ago

stoke


"1. Be attractive

2. Don't be a total dickhead

Go forth and get that dick wet!!

That's a bit shallow, that's just what you seek. Some females have standards and don't drop their knickers just because a man is attractive. Sometimes being attractive can make a man arrogant. Men are so much more than just looks.

Yes, I'm shallow. "

I’m a pool attended at the shallow end

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