Should you choose to appear here, that means you've given me consent to bum you.
Not in the real world of course. Just a good old-fashiomed thread-bumming.
But, you get to ask me to do something for you. Sexual or non-sexual.
Also, for thread purposes, I'll bum the bepenised as well as the non-bepenised.
I may not be entirely truthful if you ask me to do something revealing my private world, but go as far as you want in your requests and I'll do my damnedest to give it to you.
And the really good news - you can opt "out" at any point after I've bummed you.
But if you turn up, you're getting a bloody good bumming!
Assume the position 🫦🫦. |
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"AHH just burn me, had enough of all the shit and I fancy being a martyr 
Oh bum not burn, not a good poster model for Specsavers  "
Careful - two comments means you're double-bummed now.
Bet that burns a bit   . |
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"AHH just burn me, had enough of all the shit and I fancy being a martyr
Oh bum not burn, not a good poster model for Specsavers
Careful - two comments means you're double-bummed now.
Bet that burns a bit ."
Was lube involved  |
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"AHH just burn me, had enough of all the shit and I fancy being a martyr
Oh bum not burn, not a good poster model for Specsavers
Careful - two comments means you're double-bummed now.
Bet that burns a bit .
Was lube involved "
Blimey you're a glutton for punishment! Three bummings now . With that in mind, I'll say yup - you had lube for them all.
Unless you'd rather not of course?
(You get a "bumming bye" on your next comment....not sure you can take 4 in such quick succession  ) |
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"Can you at least buy me a happy meal first, that way it won’t hurt my pride so much. 🫱🏻🍑🫲🏻"
.
I'm going to assume this is Mr?
For you, a Happy Meal is the very least I could do. Might even give you some aftercare, like a sponge or something 😘. |
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"Can you at least buy me a happy meal first, that way it won’t hurt my pride so much. 🫱🏻🍑🫲🏻
.
I'm going to assume this is Mr?
For you, a Happy Meal is the very least I could do. Might even give you some aftercare, like a sponge or something 😘."
See nick old buddy old pal, there is no way I could impersonate the mrs, you read it and knew straight away it was me, I’m flawed 😩
The mr |
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"AHH just burn me, had enough of all the shit and I fancy being a martyr
Oh bum not burn, not a good poster model for Specsavers
Careful - two comments means you're double-bummed now.
Bet that burns a bit .
Was lube involved
Blimey you're a glutton for punishment! Three bummings now . With that in mind, I'll say yup - you had lube for them all.
Unless you'd rather not of course?
(You get a "bumming bye" on your next comment....not sure you can take 4 in such quick succession )"
What can I say - glutton |
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"AHH just burn me, had enough of all the shit and I fancy being a martyr
Oh bum not burn, not a good poster model for Specsavers
Careful - two comments means you're double-bummed now.
Bet that burns a bit .
Was lube involved
Blimey you're a glutton for punishment! Three bummings now . With that in mind, I'll say yup - you had lube for them all.
Unless you'd rather not of course?
(You get a "bumming bye" on your next comment....not sure you can take 4 in such quick succession )
What can I say - glutton "
I reckon you just wanted another Happy Meal tbh, and that warm, wet sponge on your sphincter afterwards...
But you got your second bumming out of it too 😉. |
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"Can you at least buy me a happy meal first, that way it won’t hurt my pride so much. 🫱🏻🍑🫲🏻
.
I'm going to assume this is Mr?
For you, a Happy Meal is the very least I could do. Might even give you some aftercare, like a sponge or something 😘.
See nick old buddy old pal, there is no way I could impersonate the mrs, you read it and knew straight away it was me, I’m flawed 😩
The mr "
!!
Christ! I nearly missed a bumming for you there |
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"Bit of good old public school bumming never hurt anyone "
.
I don't mind admitting - I'm a little surprised at how willing the bummees are, without asking for anything/much in return.
Who says altruism is dead!
Oh - and I did a little bit of a side angle thrust for you....reaches the parts other bummings can't reach  . |
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"Bit of good old public school bumming never hurt anyone
.
I don't mind admitting - I'm a little surprised at how willing the bummees are, without asking for anything/much in return.
Who says altruism is dead!
Oh - and I did a little bit of a side angle thrust for you....reaches the parts other bummings can't reach ."
Well thank you the prostate gland appreciated it |
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"Bit of good old public school bumming never hurt anyone
.
I don't mind admitting - I'm a little surprised at how willing the bummees are, without asking for anything/much in return.
Who says altruism is dead!
Oh - and I did a little bit of a side angle thrust for you....reaches the parts other bummings can't reach .
Well thank you the prostate gland appreciated it "
You're very welcome Dick. And you get a bonus-bumming for the second comment!
I might stop with the automatic bonus-bummings now though (although available upon request)...it's quite draining ya know . |
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" available upon request)...it's quite draining ya know .
I was just about to ask if you wanted a cup of tea  "
Can't believe it took you so long to turn up BumBums!!
I'd love a cuppa please - strong, dash of milk, one big sugar.
Now, about that bumming.
Would you like some kisses on your back too? And then a slow, sensual bumming?
If not, just ask for your preferred bumming, and I'll do my best to please you xxxx . |
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" available upon request)...it's quite draining ya know .
I was just about to ask if you wanted a cup of tea
Can't believe it took you so long to turn up BumBums!!
I'd love a cuppa please - strong, dash of milk, one big sugar.
Now, about that bumming.
Would you like some kisses on your back too? And then a slow, sensual bumming?
If not, just ask for your preferred bumming, and I'll do my best to please you xxxx ."
Tea to your liking coming up and I am not fussed. So that you know I am expecting an important call in five minutes so time is of the essence  |
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" available upon request)...it's quite draining ya know .
I was just about to ask if you wanted a cup of tea
Can't believe it took you so long to turn up BumBums!!
I'd love a cuppa please - strong, dash of milk, one big sugar.
Now, about that bumming.
Would you like some kisses on your back too? And then a slow, sensual bumming?
If not, just ask for your preferred bumming, and I'll do my best to please you xxxx .
Tea to your liking coming up and I am not fussed. So that you know I am expecting an important call in five minutes so time is of the essence "
Crikey BumBums....great art can't be rushed!
But you should be bummed and recovered enough around the 4 minutes 58 seconds mark . |
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"AHH just burn me, had enough of all the shit and I fancy being a martyr
Oh bum not burn, not a good poster model for Specsavers
Careful - two comments means you're double-bummed now.
Bet that burns a bit .
Was lube involved
Blimey you're a glutton for punishment! Three bummings now . With that in mind, I'll say yup - you had lube for them all.
Unless you'd rather not of course?
(You get a "bumming bye" on your next comment....not sure you can take 4 in such quick succession )
What can I say - glutton
I reckon you just wanted another Happy Meal tbh, and that warm, wet sponge on your sphincter afterwards...
But you got your second bumming out of it too 😉."
Oops - have just seen that I confused Justaman with Mr KOTCT - sorry if either of you got bummed more or less than you were hoping for, but Justaman - you can have two bonus bummings for my error if you like? I'm doing one of them from quite a steep angle, gripping your hips and going deep. You may need to clench the duvet tight . |
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