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Should you have sex on the first date?

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By *hagTonight OP   Man 4 weeks ago

From the land of haribos.

I read and interesting serve about it and did you know that about 60% of males would do it and only about 43% of women would consider having sex on the first date?

Why do you think that the number are so much higher for the males, could it be because of the testosterone? Some even say that sex on the first date is a red flag, which I disagree with, it is a way of enjoying ones company even more.

That got me thinking and it it would be interesting to see if you would have sex on the first date? For me. I would go with the flow, if it happens it is good and if it doesnt happen, that is also fine too

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By *sWyldWoman 4 weeks ago

Edinburgh

I would consider it if it felt right, however I do sometimes wonder if the old third date rule has some merit.

Do men see you less as girlfriend potential if you have sex on the first date?

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By *outhern77Man 4 weeks ago

Quinton

If I ever get a Date , I'll let You know! But I'd probably go with the Flow and see just what happens naturally

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By *ust JuicyWoman 4 weeks ago

east london

Date - no

But meeting someone from Fabs would very much depend on connection built before we meet and chemistry when meeting

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By *ust JuicyWoman 4 weeks ago

east london

[Removed by poster at 21/10/24 07:08:45]

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By *eliWoman 4 weeks ago

.

If you mean an actual date and not the Fab trend to call a social a date?

I wouldn't. I can count on one hand (a few fingers) the amount of times I've done so on a first date. Heck, even a first social.

But that's me and it's what I'm comfortable with. It's not because I want to date every man who puts his penis inside me (far from it).

I don't think you should play games when it comes to sex.

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By *iker JackMan 4 weeks ago

Wolverhampton

No

Whether here or a date date I always want a social once or maybe twice and sometimes thrice

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By *ellinever70Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire

I think people should do whatever feels right for them.

I wouldn't have sex on a first date but I have in the past

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By *ell GwynnWoman 4 weeks ago

North Yorkshire

I've never really done proper dating with a view to finding a relationship, so I can't speak from experience, but I still don't think there's any "should" or "shouldn't" about it.

If the chemistry and rapport are excellent, why not?

If someone thinks less of me for getting naked with them I'd see them as an option eliminated. They got naked, too, after all. I can't be doing with that sort of double standard.

In all liklihood it would probably take me until at least date 2 or 3 to know if I wanted to have sex, anyway.

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By *illy IdolMan 4 weeks ago

Midlands


"If you mean an actual date and not the Fab trend to call a social a date?

I wouldn't. I can count on one hand (a few fingers) the amount of times I've done so on a first date. Heck, even a first social.

But that's me and it's what I'm comfortable with. It's not because I want to date every man who puts his penis inside me (far from it).

I don't think you should play games when it comes to sex. "

They're the same thing, Meli. The Fab trend is to call a date a social.

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 4 weeks ago

St Leonards


"If you mean an actual date and not the Fab trend to call a social a date?

I wouldn't. I can count on one hand (a few fingers) the amount of times I've done so on a first date. Heck, even a first social.

But that's me and it's what I'm comfortable with. It's not because I want to date every man who puts his penis inside me (far from it).

I don't think you should play games when it comes to sex.

They're the same thing, Meli. The Fab trend is to call a date a social."

I'd probably have sex with Willy on the first social.

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By *hris-1980Man 4 weeks ago

Nr Tamworth

On or off FAB style date, meet up, social call it what you will, I have done but by no means do I ever go out with just that in mind.

If it feels right and things go that way then bloody brilliant and if they don’t then hopefully you enjoyed yourself and get to meet again and again, if it doesn’t end in sex so what if you made a friend.

Sex is always a bonus but to me it is more an extra something I like doing rather than an intense intimate moment between a couple.

Sex is sex and I hold it in a different light to making love. One is more primal the other is a different mind set and an all together different beast to enjoy and participate in.

Just my opinion mind, you don’t have to agree with it but also no reason to bash it.

Happy Fabbing

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By *eliWoman 4 weeks ago

.


"If you mean an actual date and not the Fab trend to call a social a date?

I wouldn't. I can count on one hand (a few fingers) the amount of times I've done so on a first date. Heck, even a first social.

But that's me and it's what I'm comfortable with. It's not because I want to date every man who puts his penis inside me (far from it).

I don't think you should play games when it comes to sex.

They're the same thing, Meli. The Fab trend is to call a date a social."

They're not the same thing Willy.

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By *illy IdolMan 4 weeks ago

Midlands


"If you mean an actual date and not the Fab trend to call a social a date?

I wouldn't. I can count on one hand (a few fingers) the amount of times I've done so on a first date. Heck, even a first social.

But that's me and it's what I'm comfortable with. It's not because I want to date every man who puts his penis inside me (far from it).

I don't think you should play games when it comes to sex.

They're the same thing, Meli. The Fab trend is to call a date a social.

I'd probably have sex with Willy on the first date."

You're only human, Nicky

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By *TinyDelight-Woman 4 weeks ago

City Centre

I've never had sex on a first date.

In relation to Fab? I have been wooed. Not often, but it's happened.

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By *eliWoman 4 weeks ago

.

Anyway, I think Shag is talking about more traditional dates, away from Fab.

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By *aven.Woman 4 weeks ago

Not the North West...

Sure. I tend not to do second or third meets/dates/whatevers. If I'm meeting someone, I'm 95% sure I'm having sex with them.

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By *illy IdolMan 4 weeks ago

Midlands


"If you mean an actual date and not the Fab trend to call a social a date?

I wouldn't. I can count on one hand (a few fingers) the amount of times I've done so on a first date. Heck, even a first social.

But that's me and it's what I'm comfortable with. It's not because I want to date every man who puts his penis inside me (far from it).

I don't think you should play games when it comes to sex.

They're the same thing, Meli. The Fab trend is to call a date a social.

They're not the same thing Willy.

"

With all due respect, Meli, you're full of shit.

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By *oandstephCouple 4 weeks ago

Bradford


"I would consider it if it felt right, however I do sometimes wonder if the old third date rule has some merit.

Do men see you less as girlfriend potential if you have sex on the first date? "

i have to say id personally see someone who had sex on a first date less likely to become a partner

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman 4 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

Should feels odd. People should do what feels right for them.

I generally don't. I like to spend time with someone then go away and let things gestate in my brain for a bit to see how I feel about things. It's easy to get caught up in chemistry and overlook things if I rush into things.

First date with someone I've already known as a friend, maybe. First date with someone I haven't had time to know at all before then, probably not for me 💜

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By *ogerroger69Man 4 weeks ago

West Yorks

Yes, yes and yes x

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By *elboy1978Man 4 weeks ago

Fellgate

Yes

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By *ell GwynnWoman 4 weeks ago

North Yorkshire


"I would consider it if it felt right, however I do sometimes wonder if the old third date rule has some merit.

Do men see you less as girlfriend potential if you have sex on the first date? i have to say id personally see someone who had sex on a first date less likely to become a partner "

Why is that? Genuinely curious.

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By *eliWoman 4 weeks ago

.


"If you mean an actual date and not the Fab trend to call a social a date?

I wouldn't. I can count on one hand (a few fingers) the amount of times I've done so on a first date. Heck, even a first social.

But that's me and it's what I'm comfortable with. It's not because I want to date every man who puts his penis inside me (far from it).

I don't think you should play games when it comes to sex.

They're the same thing, Meli. The Fab trend is to call a date a social.

They're not the same thing Willy.

With all due respect, Meli, you're full of shit."

With all due respect, the swearing is unnecessary. We can have differing opinions on things on Fab, dating, all of that without resorting to rudeness.

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By *illy IdolMan 4 weeks ago

Midlands


"If you mean an actual date and not the Fab trend to call a social a date?

I wouldn't. I can count on one hand (a few fingers) the amount of times I've done so on a first date. Heck, even a first social.

But that's me and it's what I'm comfortable with. It's not because I want to date every man who puts his penis inside me (far from it).

I don't think you should play games when it comes to sex.

They're the same thing, Meli. The Fab trend is to call a date a social.

They're not the same thing Willy.

With all due respect, Meli, you're full of shit.

With all due respect, the swearing is unnecessary. We can have differing opinions on things on Fab, dating, all of that without resorting to rudeness. "

Deepest apologies, that was uncalled for🙌

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By *eardedguy800Man 4 weeks ago

Kidderminster

Prefer to get to know people. That might take several socials.

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 4 weeks ago

St Leonards


"If you mean an actual date and not the Fab trend to call a social a date?

I wouldn't. I can count on one hand (a few fingers) the amount of times I've done so on a first date. Heck, even a first social.

But that's me and it's what I'm comfortable with. It's not because I want to date every man who puts his penis inside me (far from it).

I don't think you should play games when it comes to sex.

They're the same thing, Meli. The Fab trend is to call a date a social.

They're not the same thing Willy.

With all due respect, Meli, you're full of shit.

With all due respect, the swearing is unnecessary. We can have differing opinions on things on Fab, dating, all of that without resorting to rudeness. "

I think you two need to go out on a social to resolve this ya know

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By *sWyldWoman 4 weeks ago

Edinburgh


"I would consider it if it felt right, however I do sometimes wonder if the old third date rule has some merit.

Do men see you less as girlfriend potential if you have sex on the first date? i have to say id personally see someone who had sex on a first date less likely to become a partner

Why is that? Genuinely curious."

I can't be sure but my theory on this is that if a woman does that on the first date some men may see her as less of a challenge and therefore more likely to lose interest. It may just be a double standard or they might suddenly worry you're not going to be faithful to them. Who knows.

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By *eavenscentitCouple 4 weeks ago

barnstaple

I had sex on my first date with my ex husband, sparks flew and we were together for 20yrs. This was an exception, everything aligned. Ms

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By *ulieScrumptiousWoman 4 weeks ago

North West


"I've never really done proper dating with a view to finding a relationship, so I can't speak from experience, but I still don't think there's any "should" or "shouldn't" about it.

If the chemistry and rapport are excellent, why not?

If someone thinks less of me for getting naked with them I'd see them as an option eliminated. They got naked, too, after all. I can't be doing with that sort of double standard.

In all liklihood it would probably take me until at least date 2 or 3 to know if I wanted to have sex, anyway.

"

That double standard is so real and so shitty. If someone decided they didn't want a relationship because I'd done *exactly the same* as them, then thank you for showing we could never be compatible!

My relationship with one of my partners started in a completely topsy-turvy way with the sex and chemistry coming before the feelings.

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By *uicy 2020Woman 4 weeks ago

London


"Do men see you less as girlfriend potential if you have sex on the first date? "

I think that unfortunately there are many people who still think like this.

On an actual date where i have romantic intentions towards them i would say no, i wouldnt have sex on the 1st couple of dates.

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By *ell GwynnWoman 4 weeks ago

North Yorkshire


"I've never really done proper dating with a view to finding a relationship, so I can't speak from experience, but I still don't think there's any "should" or "shouldn't" about it.

If the chemistry and rapport are excellent, why not?

If someone thinks less of me for getting naked with them I'd see them as an option eliminated. They got naked, too, after all. I can't be doing with that sort of double standard.

In all liklihood it would probably take me until at least date 2 or 3 to know if I wanted to have sex, anyway.

That double standard is so real and so shitty. If someone decided they didn't want a relationship because I'd done *exactly the same* as them, then thank you for showing we could never be compatible!

My relationship with one of my partners started in a completely topsy-turvy way with the sex and chemistry coming before the feelings. "

If I ever did date with the view to finding a partner, I'd be almost tempted to make a point of having sex on the first date (chemistry permitting) so I don't inadvertently end up putting time and energy into a relationship with someone who sees women as lesser for liking sex. Imagine waiting until date 3, spending a few months together, and then realising they hold that double standard.

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By *hagTonight OP   Man 4 weeks ago

From the land of haribos.

[Removed by poster at 21/10/24 08:20:12]

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By *hagTonight OP   Man 4 weeks ago

From the land of haribos.


"If you mean an actual date and not the Fab trend to call a social a date?

I wouldn't. I can count on one hand (a few fingers) the amount of times I've done so on a first date. Heck, even a first social.

But that's me and it's what I'm comfortable with. It's not because I want to date every man who puts his penis inside me (far from it).

I don't think you should play games when it comes to sex. "

Hi _eli, yes. I meant more an actual date, but a fab one too. I would consider it in both cases, that is good that you are comfortable with it too

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By *rHotNottsMan 4 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Women are far more sexually selective, it’s biological, they wait & choose the best they can find as they have a finite supply of eggs.

I have done a few times but also like to wait a couple of dates too to get to know them & make sure it’s not going to be a one off. Ending something after having sex once isn’t nice , better to not have sex

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By *usyBusyGirlWoman 4 weeks ago

Brum

I am clearly in the minority here, struggle timewise so generally prefer to avoid the "social" x

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By *ir Toot of the frostMan 4 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent

Whether it's a social or a date I'd prefer not too, I would be way too nervous.

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By *HUSH-Man 4 weeks ago

London

I haven’t had sex on a first date. Just some heavy canoodling.

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By *ot really famousMan 4 weeks ago

monaghan

Am I reading what men really think about having sex on a first date,or am I reading what men think women want to hear about having sex ob a first date.?

Ffs...man up...if there was sex on offer on a first date, of course I would jump at it...(no pun intended)

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By *ruceyyMan 4 weeks ago

London

Had one last night, WINK.

A yes from me. Usually does mean from my experience it'll probably just be a bit of fun though.

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By *ir Toot of the frostMan 4 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent


"Am I reading what men really think about having sex on a first date,or am I reading what men think women want to hear about having sex ob a first date.?

Ffs...man up...if there was sex on offer on a first date, of course I would jump at it...(no pun intended)"

No I'm good, I'm man enough I'd ruin the night if I did have sex on the first night.

Working in my confidence though so in time I guess.

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By *parkle1974Woman 4 weeks ago

Leeds

I've never had sex on a 1st date and never would. Personally, rightly or wrongly I like to get to know someone first.

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By *weetiepie99Woman 4 weeks ago

cardiff

There is nothing wrong with having sex on a first 'date', whether there are long term romantic intentions or not. Do whatever feels right.

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By *iker JackMan 4 weeks ago

Wolverhampton

Maybe titled better as

Could you have sex on a first date

As should you makes it sound like an obligation

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By *ik NaksCouple 4 weeks ago

Wigan

We had sex on our first date and still together nearly 20 years later xx

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By *insBadMan 4 weeks ago

& around

With dating apps and sites such as this, I kind of think when you meet someone for the first time, you're not actually on your first date,,,

You have liked each others photos

You vibe each others chat

So when you meet your kind of already on your 3rd date

And we all know what happens on a 3rd date

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By *mashingPumpkinMan 4 weeks ago

Carmarthen

I have had sex on first dates before. If it feels right I just go with the flow, not going to say no.

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By *icecouple561Couple 4 weeks ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

Not any more.

When I was younger I did, we both did. Mr still would

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By *ildTimes777Man 4 weeks ago

Colchester/London

On fab yes, I've done it on first meets that's what we're all here for ultimately, in the realm world on proper dates probably not , unless I thought I wasn't seeing them again, if I was looking for a long term partner wouldn't want to jump into it too fast

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By *icecouple561Couple 4 weeks ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"On fab yes, I've done it on first meets that's what we're all here for ultimately, in the realm world on proper dates probably not , unless I thought I wasn't seeing them again, if I was looking for a long term partner wouldn't want to jump into it too fast"

We had sex on our first date. We've been together 44 years.

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By *ik NaksCouple 4 weeks ago

Wigan


"On fab yes, I've done it on first meets that's what we're all here for ultimately, in the realm world on proper dates probably not , unless I thought I wasn't seeing them again, if I was looking for a long term partner wouldn't want to jump into it too fast

We had sex on our first date. We've been together 44 years. "

Love it x

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By *icecouple561Couple 4 weeks ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"On fab yes, I've done it on first meets that's what we're all here for ultimately, in the realm world on proper dates probably not , unless I thought I wasn't seeing them again, if I was looking for a long term partner wouldn't want to jump into it too fast

We had sex on our first date. We've been together 44 years.

Love it x"

it worked for you and us

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By * and R cple4Couple 4 weeks ago

swansea

I don't see the issue with, if 2 adults are attracted to each other than why not it's no different to one night stands really.

I slept with my husband a couple of hours after we first met and we've been together 32 years .

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By *neeyedwillieMan 4 weeks ago

Darlington

Sex on first dates let alone thord dates wasn't a thing. The majority (supposedly) waited till they got married. It was only access to birth control that made it a thing.

This is all a recent thing in human history.

But yeah...First date, third date...what does it matter anymore. Accorsing to what ive read, less and less People seem to be getting into relationships anymore anyway.

I'm not joking either. Morgan Stanley Investment banking of all people project 45% of American women (with the west following the pattern) between the ages of 22 to 45 to be single (and childless) by 2030...and that number is going to rise.

I don't care personally (I'm a married swinger) but I do wonder whats going on with the younger generations.

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By *ik NaksCouple 4 weeks ago

Wigan


"I don't see the issue with, if 2 adults are attracted to each other than why not it's no different to one night stands really.

I slept with my husband a couple of hours after we first met and we've been together 32 years . "

A long term relationship these days feels like it’s 6 months or are we just showing our age? 🤷‍♀️ x

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By *pandjMan 4 weeks ago

Sparkford

Have no issues with it and as I've got older I'm more fussy about what I physically want from someone. Dating someone you really like and finding out they don't do passionate kissing, dont like their awesome boobs played with or being eaten out happened more times than you'd think. Was gutted each time it happened but you can't really change any of these and can't change how much I like them.

Guess I'm saying it sometimes helps to get it out of the way so you can move on if you're not comparable but also run the risk of them feeling like they've been used.

Also depends on the situation as the one who insisted we had sex in my car at a local country park on the first date instantly made me question weather I wanted to see her again. I also stay in hotels and was chatting to someone who became an ex but if I'd invited her over as a first meeting I'd have questioned her too and expected the same back tbh.

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By *icecouple561Couple 4 weeks ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

I think successful very long term relationships are rare an always have been.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS 4 weeks ago

Central

I'd be inclined towards it but I'd be happy taking it as it comes

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By *sWyldWoman 4 weeks ago

Edinburgh


"

Sex on first dates let alone thord dates wasn't a thing. The majority (supposedly) waited till they got married. It was only access to birth control that made it a thing.

This is all a recent thing in human history.

But yeah...First date, third date...what does it matter anymore. Accorsing to what ive read, less and less People seem to be getting into relationships anymore anyway.

I'm not joking either. Morgan Stanley Investment banking of all people project 45% of American women (with the west following the pattern) between the ages of 22 to 45 to be single (and childless) by 2030...and that number is going to rise.

I don't care personally (I'm a married swinger) but I do wonder whats going on with the younger generations.

"

Honestly we have become jaded. We are independent in our lives and don't want to risk someone ruining that.

I've got 3 sons but for some children aren't for them and I really respect that, look at the world we now bring them into.

It's now much more socially acceptable for women to enter into casual relationships with out commitment and it's great.

These stats don't surprise me at all.

Women are moving forward, yet sometimes it seems men move back. All this egotistical nonsense about not wanting women who are too sexual or too independent or god forbid capable.

And I say all of this as someone who is a romantic and openly wants happily ever after.

That doesn't mean I'm willing to just settle for anyone who will have me.

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By *eavensscent80Man 4 weeks ago

Wickham


"I would consider it if it felt right, however I do sometimes wonder if the old third date rule has some merit.

Do men see you less as girlfriend potential if you have sex on the first date? "

I have had relationships of over 5 years which started with sex on the first date, absolutely not the case that I would be less likely to think that way but it’s all about the person and connection ☺️

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By *icecouple561Couple 4 weeks ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"I would consider it if it felt right, however I do sometimes wonder if the old third date rule has some merit.

Do men see you less as girlfriend potential if you have sex on the first date? "

Some of them do.

I think the assumption is that all women want a boyfriend but that isn't so. I didn't expect and often didn't want to see a guy again if we'd had sex on a first date. We'd shared a drink, had a laugh and a bit of fun, that was all. I think it's about mind set. If you're going to feel used or feel that someone who has sex for fun isn't worthy of dating then sex on a first date is probably best avoided.

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By *hismMan 4 weeks ago

Ballygonowhere

Should I have sex on a first date?

No

Would I have sex on the first date?

Yes,and have done many times

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By *agnar73Man 4 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

In past, haven’t intended to, third date rule and all that, but a spark and it happened.

Wanna come in for a coffee.. etc.

I don’t think there’s anything to judge anyone about and it doesn’t mean anything, but some men will talk shit regardless of whether sex happens first date or fifth.

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By *edonisticUsCouple 4 weeks ago

Warwickshire

We did, 14 years ago. The rest, as they say, is history.

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By *mmaleiaWoman 4 weeks ago

East Northamptonshire

If nothings happening by the 3rd date, I’m not interested

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By *ay LaflameMan 4 weeks ago

A area not far from you... Msg Me

Are we talking fab or real life? As this is subjective to everyone as my approach wouldn’t fit everyone’s need and vice versa, however if the connection Is there and it felt right why not!? But we need to first understand is the fab or irl as I’m sure we can understand these circumstances will bring different approaches wether someone is looking long term or short self gratification there and then

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By *entlemanrogueMan 4 weeks ago

Motherwell


"I would consider it if it felt right, however I do sometimes wonder if the old third date rule has some merit.

Do men see you less as girlfriend potential if you have sex on the first date? "

Honestly I think most men do. to be fair i think most women would see a man that want to or does fuck on a first date as less likely to be bf material as well.

I have refused/rejected offers of sex on first dates and tbh, it seems to make women much more eager to meet again

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By *r Mrs FuckableCouple 4 weeks ago

Stoke

Dating me, you've no chance on a first date... But on here as a one off, you've every chance.

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By *enegadeMMan 4 weeks ago

Oxfordshire


"I read and interesting serve about it and did you know that about 60% of males would do it and only about 43% of women would consider having sex on the first date?

Why do you think that the number are so much higher for the males, could it be because of the testosterone? Some even say that sex on the first date is a red flag, which I disagree with, it is a way of enjoying ones company even more.

That got me thinking and it it would be interesting to see if you would have sex on the first date? For me. I would go with the flow, if it happens it is good and if it doesnt happen, that is also fine too "

The numbers don’t seem that drastically different I’d of thought it would have been a larger gap.

It’s all about feeling comfortable . Go in there with no expectations and see where the mood takes you…. Reactions to things can happen unexpectedly and so it’s a decision to control it and as long as you both feel the same … go with whatever is right

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By *odgerMooreMan 4 weeks ago

Carlisle

Depends on a lot of different things… i very rarely meet anyway so to get me to meet someone I would already have chatted and feel some sort of connection and comfort with them. If that carries over into the IRL meeting then no reason why not. There’s never any expectations of sex on a meet. It sometimes becomes clear that it’s an option if the flirty chat leads there.

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By *aizyWoman 4 weeks ago

west midlands


"Depends on a lot of different things… i very rarely meet anyway so to get me to meet someone I would already have chatted and feel some sort of connection and comfort with them. If that carries over into the IRL meeting then no reason why not. There’s never any expectations of sex on a meet. It sometimes becomes clear that it’s an option if the flirty chat leads there. "

I agree with this, meeting for a first social from here you can feel the chemistry if it is there. As for actual dating, it has been a long time since I was looking for someone to date.

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By *alcon77Man 4 weeks ago

under the sun & the moon

Shake hands on the 1st.

Kiss on the 2nd.

Sex on the 3rd.

In a perfect world.

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By *electableicecreamMan 4 weeks ago

The West

I don't really have rules around this but I do tend to meet for a date or a coffee first to see if there's a spark and I like to wait to see if it holds.

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By *neeyedwillieMan 4 weeks ago

Darlington


"

Sex on first dates let alone thord dates wasn't a thing. The majority (supposedly) waited till they got married. It was only access to birth control that made it a thing.

This is all a recent thing in human history.

But yeah...First date, third date...what does it matter anymore. Accorsing to what ive read, less and less People seem to be getting into relationships anymore anyway.

I'm not joking either. Morgan Stanley Investment banking of all people project 45% of American women (with the west following the pattern) between the ages of 22 to 45 to be single (and childless) by 2030...and that number is going to rise.

I don't care personally (I'm a married swinger) but I do wonder whats going on with the younger generations.

Honestly we have become jaded. We are independent in our lives and don't want to risk someone ruining that.

I've got 3 sons but for some children aren't for them and I really respect that, look at the world we now bring them into.

It's now much more socially acceptable for women to enter into casual relationships with out commitment and it's great.

These stats don't surprise me at all.

Women are moving forward, yet sometimes it seems men move back. All this egotistical nonsense about not wanting women who are too sexual or too independent or god forbid capable.

And I say all of this as someone who is a romantic and openly wants happily ever after.

That doesn't mean I'm willing to just settle for anyone who will have me.

"

Yeah..I'm not going to change your mind no matter what I say.

But I will ask this given the things you've said.

What is it that you offer as a partner than means you're the one settling?

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By *icecouple561Couple 4 weeks ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"I don't really have rules around this but I do tend to meet for a date or a coffee first to see if there's a spark and I like to wait to see if it holds."

We do that now and if God forbid I was dating I would too.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman 4 weeks ago

Reading

I usually don't though there have been exceptions when the chemistry is too tempting. On the whole, I prefer to get to know the person first. It improves the communication which improves the sex.

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By *electableicecreamMan 4 weeks ago

The West


"I don't really have rules around this but I do tend to meet for a date or a coffee first to see if there's a spark and I like to wait to see if it holds.

We do that now and if God forbid I was dating I would too. "

Life's too short for bad sex!

That little bit of time invested in sussing things out has really worked out well for me in the long term.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman 4 weeks ago

Reading


"Shake hands on the 1st.

Kiss on the 2nd.

Sex on the 3rd.

In a perfect world."

Whether a date or a social i always end it with a kiss. You have to see if the chemistry is there so a snog is essential.

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By *ellinever70Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"I don't really have rules around this but I do tend to meet for a date or a coffee first to see if there's a spark and I like to wait to see if it holds.

We do that now and if God forbid I was dating I would too.

Life's too short for bad sex!

That little bit of time invested in sussing things out has really worked out well for me in the long term. "

I don't think anyone knows whether the sex will be good or bad until you actually do it

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By *icecouple561Couple 4 weeks ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"I don't really have rules around this but I do tend to meet for a date or a coffee first to see if there's a spark and I like to wait to see if it holds.

We do that now and if God forbid I was dating I would too.

Life's too short for bad sex!

That little bit of time invested in sussing things out has really worked out well for me in the long term. "

Good.

Life is too short to worry about stuff like that in my opinion. If it's casual sex people are after a certain mindset is required I think.

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By *ad NannaWoman 4 weeks ago

East London

If I dated it would be to find someone for a committed relationship.

If he wanted sex on the first date I'd be inclined to think he wasn't serious about anything other than sex.

I can get hook ups easily online.

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By *electableicecreamMan 4 weeks ago

The West


"I don't really have rules around this but I do tend to meet for a date or a coffee first to see if there's a spark and I like to wait to see if it holds.

We do that now and if God forbid I was dating I would too.

Life's too short for bad sex!

That little bit of time invested in sussing things out has really worked out well for me in the long term.

I don't think anyone knows whether the sex will be good or bad until you actually do it"

Honestly my feeling for a good connection has been pretty consistently good and the only times I've not had great sex is when I haven't taken the time to get to know the person I went to bed with.

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By *hagTonight OP   Man 4 weeks ago

From the land of haribos.


"I've never really done proper dating with a view to finding a relationship, so I can't speak from experience, but I still don't think there's any "should" or "shouldn't" about it.

If the chemistry and rapport are excellent, why not?

If someone thinks less of me for getting naked with them I'd see them as an option eliminated. They got naked, too, after all. I can't be doing with that sort of double standard.

In all liklihood it would probably take me until at least date 2 or 3 to know if I wanted to have sex, anyway.

"

Hi nell, yes, you are right there, if the chemistry and rapport are excellent, why not too

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By *uffolkcouple-bi onlyCouple 4 weeks ago

West Suffolk


"I read and interesting serve about it and did you know that about 60% of males would do it and only about 43% of women would consider having sex on the first date?

Why do you think that the number are so much higher for the males, could it be because of the testosterone? Some even say that sex on the first date is a red flag, which I disagree with, it is a way of enjoying ones company even more.

That got me thinking and it it would be interesting to see if you would have sex on the first date? For me. I would go with the flow, if it happens it is good and if it doesnt happen, that is also fine too "

If two people wanna fuck, what’s the issue? If one of them doesn’t then so be it. I don’t get the logic of “I wanted to but I didn’t want him thinking I was easy” or just not doing it at n principle

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By *he Silver FuxMan 4 weeks ago

Uttoxeter

Dating in pursuit of a potential long term relationship is a different ball game… the traditional notion of no sex until at least the third date is important to communicate respect, that it’s not about a quick shag or worrying about reputation ‘what will he think of me if we slept together on the first date’; I’m here and I’m serious about getting to know you…

That said I guarantee the best underwear has been selected, cleaned and scrubbed nethers, blokes have shaved those balls and every woman has trimmed / shaved that muff for a first date… you know…. just in case 😂

I’ve had dates where at the very first meeting there was an intense sexual desire that was like static in the air, that there were two people that desperately wanted to fuck, all the signals, touching, longing looks, lower lip biting, bulges in trousers and tight crossing of legs to squeeze that fanny tingling but daren’t… because of reputation, convention, ritual…

Once or twice I’ve buckled and just suggested getting a hotel room and it’s always been god yes, thank fuck for that, I really need some cock, I think was going to burst 😂😈

Personally I wouldn’t think badly of a woman having sex on a first date, to me it’s someone who is confident, knows what they want and aren’t afraid to ask… fuck convention. That’s my kind of person I would want a relationship with

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By *ittleLiasonsWoman 4 weeks ago

Birmingham

I think my attitude has changed towards it now and if I ever was to date someone, I wouldn't want to venture into anything sexual until we had established something. I can get casual hook ups easily so I don't want that from the dating world too.

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By *hagTonight OP   Man 4 weeks ago

From the land of haribos.


"If I ever get a Date , I'll let You know! But I'd probably go with the Flow and see just what happens naturally"
That is good

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By *8on33Man 4 weeks ago

winfrith

If it were solely a dating site then no but as it's a sex site why not .

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By *ife NinjaMan 4 weeks ago

Dunfermline

Why not? You might get knocked down when you leave the pub

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By *iscreetfbMan 4 weeks ago

horsham

I have and would do again

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By *andS300ABCCouple 4 weeks ago

BRIGHTON

Have sex before you date

No disappointments later down the line

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By *enelope2UWoman 4 weeks ago

Fife

Id never say never but I've never had a guy worth fucking on a first date..

I've had sex on a first encounter..vastly different

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By *itygamesMan 4 weeks ago

UK

happens all the time on holidays abroad i think..

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By *tsJustKateWoman 4 weeks ago

London

I don't do dates, just meets and they are for sex.

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By *orphia2003Woman 4 weeks ago

Tonypandy.

If you want to have sex on a first date, and the other person/s are in agreement, then.do it. If you don't, then don't.

It's your body and your choice what you do with it.

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By *ittle Miss TinkerbellWoman 4 weeks ago

your head

I don't know about should but I have. Has it always led further,no. But that doesn't necessarily mean I regret it. I wouldn't say I'd never do it again because it depends on the chemist at the time. If I like someone enough to want to have sex with them and we're in agreement then why not? Unless the time or place isn't appropriate of course.

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By *rRiosMan 4 weeks ago

dublin


"I've never had sex on a first date.

In relation to Fab? I have been wooed. Not often, but it's happened. "

What if you were wow’d rather than wooed?

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By *eatle1987Man 4 weeks ago

Cheltenham

TBH my response is the same whether a Fab or Vanilla date. There is no hard and fast rule. It all depends on the person and the connection. Sometimes theres a real spark there, sometimes it's a slow burn and sometimes there is nothing there at all.

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By *hagTonight OP   Man 4 weeks ago

From the land of haribos.


"I think successful very long term relationships are rare an always have been. "
Yes, you are right there. I also think that successful very long term relationships are rare too

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By *ove2lick27Man 4 weeks ago

Sheffield


"Date - no

But meeting someone from Fabs would very much depend on connection built before we meet and chemistry when meeting "

Agree

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By *uvs2watchherCouple 4 weeks ago

newcastle

No sex until your both comfortable. Dated hubby for about 3 months before we had sex. Didn't know what I'd missed hence being here. But we were young. 16 and he was my first. We're married 46 years now and 2 good kids so he did something right!!! XDee xxx

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By *IXEN200Woman 4 weeks ago

newcastle upon tyne

I think it all depends on if there's a connection and then there's building up of sexual tensions if you've been chatting to each other for some time beforehand

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By *cLovin2Man 4 weeks ago

Reading


"I would consider it if it felt right, however I do sometimes wonder if the old third date rule has some merit.

Do men see you less as girlfriend potential if you have sex on the first date? "

Some men might, but frankly I think they're tossers that you wouldn't want to be with anyway. I have done it on the first date and didn't think any less of the lady. In fact we have become good friends since.

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By (user no longer on site) 4 weeks ago

[Removed by poster at 22/10/24 22:23:52]

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By *ee69Man 4 weeks ago

glasgow

If you both want to , everyone different

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By *atureguy281066Man 4 weeks ago

Manchester

Yeah I agree if both parties are up for it I don’t see why not

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By *ardhatCharlieMan 4 weeks ago

Northwest

For me it all depends on the situation and the vibe. I've had social meets where nothing has happened other than a kiss on the cheek at the end of the night, and I've had the occasional date thay has ended with some rampant sex. I tend to go with the flow. I wouldn't say no, but I'm quite happy to not have sex on the first time as well.

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By (user no longer on site) 4 weeks ago

If it was a 'proper' date (not modern online fake-date crap); I'd expect the woman to behave like a lady and not enage in sex in the first date. If she tried it with me I'd expect she tries it with every guy she meets, and for a 'proper' date it would be a no-no with me (and with any decent, sane guy who was genuinely looking for a relationship with a decent human-being. Whatever happened to anticipation and build-up and suspense? No wonder everyone's 'bored' nowadays, they even manage to make sex boring. When the sex finally does come (between a 'lady' and a 'gent') - it is truly magnificent, and not many people can relate to it because they just don't have those qualities.

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By *entlemanPMan 4 weeks ago

Grantham

If it's a date... ie not fab then no. Of its fab or an intended just a shag then yes x

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By *cLovin2Man 4 weeks ago

Reading


"

Sex on first dates let alone thord dates wasn't a thing. The majority (supposedly) waited till they got married. It was only access to birth control that made it a thing.

This is all a recent thing in human history.

But yeah...First date, third date...what does it matter anymore. Accorsing to what ive read, less and less People seem to be getting into relationships anymore anyway.

I'm not joking either. Morgan Stanley Investment banking of all people project 45% of American women (with the west following the pattern) between the ages of 22 to 45 to be single (and childless) by 2030...and that number is going to rise.

I don't care personally (I'm a married swinger) but I do wonder whats going on with the younger generations.

Honestly we have become jaded. We are independent in our lives and don't want to risk someone ruining that.

I've got 3 sons but for some children aren't for them and I really respect that, look at the world we now bring them into.

It's now much more socially acceptable for women to enter into casual relationships with out commitment and it's great.

These stats don't surprise me at all.

Women are moving forward, yet sometimes it seems men move back. All this egotistical nonsense about not wanting women who are too sexual or too independent or god forbid capable.

And I say all of this as someone who is a romantic and openly wants happily ever after.

That doesn't mean I'm willing to just settle for anyone who will have me.

"

Funny, I'd love to have a sexual independent capable woman.

Not everyone wants the god fearing house wife who's useless in the bedroom.

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By *orthern_knobberMan 4 weeks ago

manchester

If she goes 50/50 on the bill then I’d put out like a fire paddle on the moors in summertime.

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By *hrista BellendWoman 4 weeks ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

If the chemistry is there then I'd definitely have sex on a first date, I am happily promiscuous after all and would be hoping he was too

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By *ex HolesMan 4 weeks ago

Up North

Yes.

It’s the ‘best’ way to get to know someone

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