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What's the worst first message you've had
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By *929Man 8 weeks ago
newcastle |
"A tv asked me to shit on his chest
Did you do it lol
Haha no
Sorry, i was just joking there.
Seriously my worst message ever was just a dot.
.
"
I knew was joking no need to apologise no offence taken haha |
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"“How do you mangage to fuck anybody, fat fucker.”
I invited his girlfriend around for a demonstration, so I could show him how it’s done properly.
He wasn’t impressed with my response  "
I bet she was though |
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"The usual bullshit of other men thinking they can show my wife a better time than me.
One guy said I'd probably end up crying if I watched as I'd never be able to satisfy her like he can.
"
We gt this a lot. Blocked single guys from massaging but have noticed even the guys in a couple giving it the talk about their massive cock, how they're in perfect shape, my husband isn't, has a small dick, come sit on theirs etc etc.
C xoxo |
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"The usual bullshit of other men thinking they can show my wife a better time than me.
One guy said I'd probably end up crying if I watched as I'd never be able to satisfy her like he can.
We gt this a lot. Blocked single guys from massaging but have noticed even the guys in a couple giving it the talk about their massive cock, how they're in perfect shape, my husband isn't, has a small dick, come sit on theirs etc etc.
C xoxo"
Isn't it supposed to be mutual fun rather than a pissing contest?  |
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"One asking if I'd role play his sister and another from a bloke telling me he used to wank going through his mother's underwear drawer  both blocked. "
That’s just really creepy… no wonder you vomited |
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By *ony MannMan 8 weeks ago
New York City New York USA |
"Mine was. "Hey, come to so and so address right now and stick your meat through the letterbox and leave""
Have you seen that stone, you put your hand in and if you lie the stone bites your hand off.....or they could have forgotten to feed the dog |
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By *MCMan 8 weeks ago
London/EA |
Hi
From a couple who repeated said do not just message us hi on their profile and demanded you make effort.
Their status also was moaning about people sending poor openers at the time 😅 |
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By *lue-raspWoman 8 weeks ago
never ending banter |
Things like..
Im gonna fuck ur mouth
Will you peg me
Whats ur address me n my pal are gonna cum fuck n fill u
Then when u say no u get
U slut u whore u fat fucking bitch, who would wanna fuck a cunt like u etc etc |
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"Things like..
Im gonna fuck ur mouth
Will you peg me
Whats ur address me n my pal are gonna cum fuck n fill u
Then when u say no u get
U slut u whore u fat fucking bitch, who would wanna fuck a cunt like u etc etc "
When you say "No"...? Surely, you don't turn down such wonderful offers? |
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"“How do you mangage to fuck anybody, fat fucker.”
I invited his girlfriend around for a demonstration, so I could show him how it’s done properly.
He wasn’t impressed with my response
I bet she was though "
Naturally.
I was a goddamned sexual tyrannosaurus that night. |
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“Skank”
He then immediately blocked me. 🤣
Or the absolute copy & paste fail where he’d left the profile names of his previous messagees in it… I couldn’t stop laughing
Or my actual favourite. Many pictures of a very scary looking fella, in the background were loads & loads of ceramic clowns. You know when you just foresee yourself ending up in black bin bags…. |
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"“Skank”
He then immediately blocked me. 🤣
Or the absolute copy & paste fail where he’d left the profile names of his previous messagees in it… I couldn’t stop laughing
Or my actual favourite. Many pictures of a very scary looking fella, in the background were loads & loads of ceramic clowns. You know when you just foresee yourself ending up in black bin bags…."
It's when they tell you they've got the bags ready and have worked out where you are, that it gets more uncomfortable. Blocks here are wonderful |
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Just had this convo with a couple...
Them: "You on snap"
Me: "Yup"
Them: "what's your username?"
Me: "Why?"
Them: "To share on there. But don't worry, we are looking for someone polite"
Then blocked me; literally 2 minutes ago
Like wtf. Why would I give my snap immediately to a random profile?? I am clearly so impolite |
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