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RE: Personal Injury Claim - YOU MAY BE DUE COMPENSATION
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By *ib. OP Man 8 weeks ago
Hampshire |
Have you have ever been hurt or injured in a shagging related injury? If so you may be due compensation.
Has a lover ever accidentally spaffed in your eye causing pain? Perhaps an unexpected queef caused you to put your back out from laughing.
Let us know and our experienced case handlers will assess your claim.
NO WIN, NO FEE. |
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What chance do I have on that one that mistimed pulling out of my mouth to cum on my face and instead shot it full force straight up my nose?
I did not die or go blind as I genuinely believed was possible from the force of that bastard at the time. But the emotional distress was high. |
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"What chance do I have on that one that mistimed pulling out of my mouth to cum on my face and instead shot it full force straight up my nose?
I did not die or go blind as I genuinely believed was possible from the force of that bastard at the time. But the emotional distress was high."
Oh god. That reminds me of the time I swallowed weirdly and it went up my nose from the inside and dripped out. Traumatic! 😂😂 |
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"What chance do I have on that one that mistimed pulling out of my mouth to cum on my face and instead shot it full force straight up my nose?
I did not die or go blind as I genuinely believed was possible from the force of that bastard at the time. But the emotional distress was high.
Oh god. That reminds me of the time I swallowed weirdly and it went up my nose from the inside and dripped out. Traumatic! 😂😂"
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"What chance do I have on that one that mistimed pulling out of my mouth to cum on my face and instead shot it full force straight up my nose?
I did not die or go blind as I genuinely believed was possible from the force of that bastard at the time. But the emotional distress was high.
Oh god. That reminds me of the time I swallowed weirdly and it went up my nose from the inside and dripped out. Traumatic! 😂😂"
Straight. Up. My nostril.
I swear I felt it ricochet off the back of my skull.
Honestly thought I was about to die 🤣 |
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By *ornycougaWoman 8 weeks ago
NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat |
I lost a butt plug in a deep dark place whilst indulging in a particularly vigorous session riding cowgirl. Can I get compensation for both the shagging time wasted in searching the room to no avail.... And then the trauma of having to get said butt plug out genuinely thinking I would have to go to A & E to seek help? |
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"What chance do I have on that one that mistimed pulling out of my mouth to cum on my face and instead shot it full force straight up my nose?
I did not die or go blind as I genuinely believed was possible from the force of that bastard at the time. But the emotional distress was high."
Doesn’t sound like you’re eligible for compensation, but you could get £250 from the x-rated version of You’ve Been Framed  |
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"What chance do I have on that one that mistimed pulling out of my mouth to cum on my face and instead shot it full force straight up my nose?
I did not die or go blind as I genuinely believed was possible from the force of that bastard at the time. But the emotional distress was high.
Oh god. That reminds me of the time I swallowed weirdly and it went up my nose from the inside and dripped out. Traumatic! 😂😂"
I think I'm going to hell. But I found this mental image highly amusing  |
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By *agatoXXXMan 8 weeks ago
Gone and completely forgotten. |
"What chance do I have on that one that mistimed pulling out of my mouth to cum on my face and instead shot it full force straight up my nose?
I did not die or go blind as I genuinely believed was possible from the force of that bastard at the time. But the emotional distress was high.
Oh god. That reminds me of the time I swallowed weirdly and it went up my nose from the inside and dripped out. Traumatic! 😂😂
I think I'm going to hell. But I found this mental image highly amusing "
You *think* you're going to hell? It was never in doubt! |
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"I fell off the bed once whilst blindfolded and handcuffed, smashed my shoulder on the bedside cabinet!! had he not big enough hands to save you or was he blindfolded 2  "
He turned away for a second |
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"I fell off the bed once whilst blindfolded and handcuffed, smashed my shoulder on the bedside cabinet!! had he not big enough hands to save you or was he blindfolded 2
He turned away for a second "
not the safest hands in da Village so.. |
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Tore a ligament in my right ankle when running down the stairs at a well known club after my mate wanted me to get the phone as she wanted pics of her and the fella she was with.
Queue me rolling around the bottom of the stairs in agony, when about 6 naked old men came towards me. I don't know why, but they all proceeded to tear off their towels and throw them on top of me.
To this day the sight of low hanging fruit haunts my dreams. They then all ran up the stairs to tell my friend what had happened. She told me after the sight of half a dozen old naked men just bursting in on her mid stride will haunt her dreams.
Staff were lovely and the ankle healed, but I will never get a pedicure again before visits club |
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"I fell off the bed once whilst blindfolded and handcuffed, smashed my shoulder on the bedside cabinet!! had he not big enough hands to save you or was he blindfolded 2
He turned away for a second not the safest hands in da Village so.. "
Nope, never made that mistake again |
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"I fell off the bed once whilst blindfolded and handcuffed, smashed my shoulder on the bedside cabinet!! had he not big enough hands to save you or was he blindfolded 2
He turned away for a second not the safest hands in da Village so..
Nope, never made that mistake again "
lol.always check the hands and reflexes before going blindfolded.lol |
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"I fell off the bed once whilst blindfolded and handcuffed, smashed my shoulder on the bedside cabinet!! had he not big enough hands to save you or was he blindfolded 2
He turned away for a second not the safest hands in da Village so..
Nope, never made that mistake again lol.always check the hands and reflexes before going blindfolded.lol"
Or handcuff and blindfold them |
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"I believe I may be eligible for a claim due to internal discomfort, nay, BURNING when a lover didn't wash their hands properly after chopping chillies.
How much can I get? "
Depends on the Scoville scale |
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"I believe I may be eligible for a claim due to internal discomfort, nay, BURNING when a lover didn't wash their hands properly after chopping chillies.
How much can I get?
Depends on the Scoville scale "
It was most definitely a Carolina Reaper *hides the Jalapeños under the sofa....* |
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"I believe I may be eligible for a claim due to internal discomfort, nay, BURNING when a lover didn't wash their hands properly after chopping chillies.
How much can I get? "
oooouuuccchhh.jeeesssuusss. being an ex chef I winced reading that.lol |
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