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Sunday confessions
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How honestly important is it that your partner is typically attractive (in the face)?
Does your attraction to someone depend on things other than looks? Can your attraction develop towards someone you aren’t that instantly sexually attracted to?
(Inspired by MAFS) |
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It's very important to me, I won't kiss a face I don't want to look at.
Attraction can grow from personality & getting close to someone.
On here though it's harder the face is usually the last thing you see.
Mrs |
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"It's very important to me, I won't kiss a face I don't want to look at.
Attraction can grow from personality & getting close to someone.
On here though it's harder the face is usually the last thing you see.
Mrs "
Face pic or no reply  |
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Physical attraction is the primary driver. It's an instant thing, the 'spark' or "wow factor".
Not saying personality cannot become attractive but until you interact with someone you can't witness their personality.
No one had ever walked down the street and thought "look at the personality on him/her" and felt attraction. Think most of us have had furtive second glances at the "beautiful people" though and felt very attractive.
So yes physical attraction is very important.
Mrs x |
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Facial attraction is important for me. That’s not necessarily about traditional good looks but I have to find them attractive to play.
A part of that attraction though will also be contributed by their personality, humour and approach. |
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"Facial attraction is important for me. That’s not necessarily about traditional good looks but I have to find them attractive to play.
A part of that attraction though will also be contributed by their personality, humour and approach. "
Agree with this, facial attraction has to be there, but someone could be gorgeous with a personality of a potato which makes them not attractive then, good looks and good personality for the win, x |
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By (user no longer on site) 14 weeks ago
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Finding someone attractive and being attracted to them are two different things. Being pretty sparks an initial attraction but that can quickly dwindle if there's nothing else they can offer. |
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How someone looks facially is important - it can add to the attraction or completely detract.
Attraction can grow through personality and connection too but I don’t think either of us would choose a hot body over a hot face…
K
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By *nesCouple 14 weeks ago
Milton Keynes, city of dreams |
"Very.
So many have a hot body and a face that just doesn't match.
"
This is what we mean when we say to each other, ‘nah sorry I’m not keen, they’re a bit of a shrimp’.
Delicious body but the face ain’t nothing to write home about  |
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It’s highly important to me.
I’m quite happy to be called shallow for wanting to be facially attracted to someone. I find that I can’t kiss someone I’m not attracted to in a way that’s arousing. It feels more like taking one for the team. And I gave that up a fuckin long time ago. |
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"Facial attraction is important for me. That’s not necessarily about traditional good looks but I have to find them attractive to play.
A part of that attraction though will also be contributed by their personality, humour and approach. "
This is a nutshell |
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I used to think it was the most important thing. But I have met some people I didn't immediately fancy because we vibed during messaging. On chatting with them I've become very attracted to them as 'a whole' and yes, I kissed (and more) them as a result. |
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By (user no longer on site) 14 weeks ago
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I'd say it's pretty important but not the be all and end all. I prefer a good personality over looks, and go for a mixture of the both.
I would however stress that even though someone may not be to my liking physically, they can often have something about them that turns me on that I would potentially overlook in others. |
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Facial attractiveness (on my personal attractiveness scale) is one of the most important things for me. But just being a gorgeous face isn't enough. You have to be a gorgeous person too.
I'm obviously high maintenance or something. |
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By *r TriomanMan 14 weeks ago
Chippenham Malmesbury area |
Sexy energy and sassyness are the qualities of a woman that grab me first when I'm looking for someone on here or at a club, a pretty* face is a bonus but not the driving factor.
*As I define pretty. |
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"Facial attractiveness (on my personal attractiveness scale) is one of the most important things for me. But just being a gorgeous face isn't enough. You have to be a gorgeous person too.
I'm obviously high maintenance or something. "
I missed the second bit of the question. Its definitely possible to develop attraction to someone I wasn't immediately attracted to. I don't remember being attracted to Mr KC until I was and I can't pinpoint when or why something changed. |
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Immediate attraction is real, however I can feel deeply attracted to a person overtime, for who they are when they're with me.
On the other hand, I've been very attracted and involved sexually, only to turned completely off later by their disposition. |
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It’s essential that I’m physically attracted to them (both face and body) but physical attraction isn’t the only thing that matters. They also must be a decent person, good sense of humour, fun to talk to/spend time with, good in bed and well dressed. Longer term, they also need to be driven/ambitious, have similar morals and interests… I could keep going  I also think it’s possible to build or lose attraction to someone as you get to know them. But I think sexual chemistry is either there or it’s not. |
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By *929Man 14 weeks ago
bedlington |
"It’s essential that I’m physically attracted to them (both face and body) but physical attraction isn’t the only thing that matters. They also must be a decent person, good sense of humour, fun to talk to/spend time with, good in bed and well dressed. Longer term, they also need to be driven/ambitious, have similar morals and interests… I could keep going I also think it’s possible to build or lose attraction to someone as you get to know them. But I think sexual chemistry is either there or it’s not."
Well said Agree with all that but especially the driven/ambitious as this is often overlooked or not mentioned yet it’s one of the most important things imho. Drive to succeed and achieve is an amazingly attractive trait |
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I've met people that are 10/10 initially in looks the I wouldn't touch with a bargepole.
Conversely I met people that may not be conventionally attractive that are very, very shaggable because they have the right personality.
And some have both looks and the right attitude/personality.
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"It’s essential that I’m physically attracted to them (both face and body) but physical attraction isn’t the only thing that matters. They also must be a decent person, good sense of humour, fun to talk to/spend time with, good in bed and well dressed. Longer term, they also need to be driven/ambitious, have similar morals and interests… I could keep going I also think it’s possible to build or lose attraction to someone as you get to know them. But I think sexual chemistry is either there or it’s not.
Well said Agree with all that but especially the driven/ambitious as this is often overlooked or not mentioned yet it’s one of the most important things imho. Drive to succeed and achieve is an amazingly attractive trait "
Yep I agree. Wealth or status doesn’t bother me in the slightest but ambition, drive, having a skill or trade, showing commitment to something you’re passionate about and having your shit together are all very attractive qualities. |
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"It’s essential that I’m physically attracted to them (both face and body) but physical attraction isn’t the only thing that matters. They also must be a decent person, good sense of humour, fun to talk to/spend time with, good in bed and well dressed. Longer term, they also need to be driven/ambitious, have similar morals and interests… I could keep going I also think it’s possible to build or lose attraction to someone as you get to know them. But I think sexual chemistry is either there or it’s not.
Well said Agree with all that but especially the driven/ambitious as this is often overlooked or not mentioned yet it’s one of the most important things imho. Drive to succeed and achieve is an amazingly attractive trait "
We've been together since we were at school so we didn't really have any idea about the other's work ethic or intended profession. It's not the be all and end all, certainly. |
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"Physical attraction is the primary driver. It's an instant thing, the 'spark' or "wow factor".
Not saying personality cannot become attractive but until you interact with someone you can't witness their personality.
No one had ever walked down the street and thought "look at the personality on him/her" and felt attraction. Think most of us have had furtive second glances at the "beautiful people" though and felt very attractive.
So yes physical attraction is very important.
Mrs x"
This is Gospel  |
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A face I find attractive is essential. And I probably do, in general, gravitate towards conventionally attractive people, but I guess the majority of us do as there's a reason conventional standards become such!
In general, I'll know if I fancy someone pretty quickly. I can definitely find people more attractive over time as I get to know them, but there will have been a base-level of attraction from the beginning. I can't think of anyone that's gone from zero to swoon... |
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"Physical attraction is the primary driver. It's an instant thing, the 'spark' or "wow factor".
Not saying personality cannot become attractive but until you interact with someone you can't witness their personality.
No one had ever walked down the street and thought "look at the personality on him/her" and felt attraction. Think most of us have had furtive second glances at the "beautiful people" though and felt very attractive.
So yes physical attraction is very important.
Mrs x"
I think you can a huge amount about someone’s personality by their face, their eyes where they look - up, down, unable to hold eye contact etc.
Classically beautiful people aren’t always attractive , pretty privilege often results in not so nice , and not so smart people |
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By *929Man 14 weeks ago
bedlington |
"It’s essential that I’m physically attracted to them (both face and body) but physical attraction isn’t the only thing that matters. They also must be a decent person, good sense of humour, fun to talk to/spend time with, good in bed and well dressed. Longer term, they also need to be driven/ambitious, have similar morals and interests… I could keep going I also think it’s possible to build or lose attraction to someone as you get to know them. But I think sexual chemistry is either there or it’s not.
Well said Agree with all that but especially the driven/ambitious as this is often overlooked or not mentioned yet it’s one of the most important things imho. Drive to succeed and achieve is an amazingly attractive trait
We've been together since we were at school so we didn't really have any idea about the other's work ethic or intended profession. It's not the be all and end all, certainly. "
It’s a bit different back then nobody has that mentality at that age, it’s something that becomes more important the older we get in my opinion not so important at 20, but at 41 I wouldn’t entertain the idea of seriously dating someone who hasn’t got their shit together by that age |
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"It’s essential that I’m physically attracted to them (both face and body) but physical attraction isn’t the only thing that matters. They also must be a decent person, good sense of humour, fun to talk to/spend time with, good in bed and well dressed. Longer term, they also need to be driven/ambitious, have similar morals and interests… I could keep going I also think it’s possible to build or lose attraction to someone as you get to know them. But I think sexual chemistry is either there or it’s not.
Well said Agree with all that but especially the driven/ambitious as this is often overlooked or not mentioned yet it’s one of the most important things imho. Drive to succeed and achieve is an amazingly attractive trait
We've been together since we were at school so we didn't really have any idea about the other's work ethic or intended profession. It's not the be all and end all, certainly.
It’s a bit different back then nobody has that mentality at that age, it’s something that becomes more important the older we get in my opinion not so important at 20, but at 41 I wouldn’t entertain the idea of seriously dating someone who hasn’t got their shit together by that age"
I suppose that's fair. Not having any experience or intention of looking for a life partner at almost-40 means I probably am unqualified to comment |
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By *929Man 14 weeks ago
bedlington |
"It’s essential that I’m physically attracted to them (both face and body) but physical attraction isn’t the only thing that matters. They also must be a decent person, good sense of humour, fun to talk to/spend time with, good in bed and well dressed. Longer term, they also need to be driven/ambitious, have similar morals and interests… I could keep going I also think it’s possible to build or lose attraction to someone as you get to know them. But I think sexual chemistry is either there or it’s not.
Well said Agree with all that but especially the driven/ambitious as this is often overlooked or not mentioned yet it’s one of the most important things imho. Drive to succeed and achieve is an amazingly attractive trait
We've been together since we were at school so we didn't really have any idea about the other's work ethic or intended profession. It's not the be all and end all, certainly.
It’s a bit different back then nobody has that mentality at that age, it’s something that becomes more important the older we get in my opinion not so important at 20, but at 41 I wouldn’t entertain the idea of seriously dating someone who hasn’t got their shit together by that age
I suppose that's fair. Not having any experience or intention of looking for a life partner at almost-40 means I probably am unqualified to comment "
thats a very good position to be, in it’s not all that fun looking at this age as each year older you get feels like chances reduces |
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By *929Man 14 weeks ago
bedlington |
"It’s essential that I’m physically attracted to them (both face and body) but physical attraction isn’t the only thing that matters. They also must be a decent person, good sense of humour, fun to talk to/spend time with, good in bed and well dressed. Longer term, they also need to be driven/ambitious, have similar morals and interests… I could keep going I also think it’s possible to build or lose attraction to someone as you get to know them. But I think sexual chemistry is either there or it’s not.
Well said Agree with all that but especially the driven/ambitious as this is often overlooked or not mentioned yet it’s one of the most important things imho. Drive to succeed and achieve is an amazingly attractive trait
Yep I agree. Wealth or status doesn’t bother me in the slightest but ambition, drive, having a skill or trade, showing commitment to something you’re passionate about and having your shit together are all very attractive qualities. "
1000% |
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By *irthandgirthMan 14 weeks ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
"How honestly important is it that your partner is typically attractive (in the face)?
Does your attraction to someone depend on things other than looks? Can your attraction develop towards someone you aren’t that instantly sexually attracted to?
(Inspired by MAFS)"
I have a slight disconnect between aesthetic attraction and sexual attraction. The latter has multiple elements that make it up. I need to be intellectually attracted to someone, and there also needs to be chemistry, alongside finding them physically attractive for sexual attraction for me. |
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