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By (user no longer on site) OP 6 weeks ago
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Hi all, never been to a club and I don't seem to be having much interaction via messaging.
I sometimes get a reply but then fizzles after that, am I being to normal? Is asking about somebodies plans weird? I'm new to this so I don't want to be disrespectful and go in with the "nice pussy, let me ruin it" lines.
I've been looking through other threads and seen a lot of advice on going to a club or social but as a single guy I feel like it's very much "first come first serve" or "only if we know you" for some of the clubs in my area.
What advice can anybody give that might help me break the seal and actually finally join in the liberated shinnanigans instead of standing outside looking through the glass?
D X |
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If you're going to a club be prepared to dip into your pocket, there's no guarantee of fun either. The Men who are chatty and not shy are more likely to have fun. Many Men sit in a corner on there own or walk around looking, too shy to approach people and chat. Unfortunately many go home disappointed. Do go to a club (a few times to get what they're about), don't be shy and don't go with any expectations. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 6 weeks ago
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"If you're going to a club be prepared to dip into your pocket, there's no guarantee of fun either. The Men who are chatty and not shy are more likely to have fun. Many Men sit in a corner on there own or walk around looking, too shy to approach people and chat. Unfortunately many go home disappointed. Do go to a club (a few times to get what they're about), don't be shy and don't go with any expectations."
Thank you for the advice, I'm not shy so I think I'll be OK and I can hold a conversation with almost anybody. I have been told it's quite expensive for single guys at clubs and you could walk away with no interaction but honestly so is dating, which is why I stopped that and thought I'd increase my chances with swinging.
I'll take your advice into consideration.
D |
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"If you're going to a club be prepared to dip into your pocket, there's no guarantee of fun either. The Men who are chatty and not shy are more likely to have fun. Many Men sit in a corner on there own or walk around looking, too shy to approach people and chat. Unfortunately many go home disappointed. Do go to a club (a few times to get what they're about), don't be shy and don't go with any expectations.
Thank you for the advice, I'm not shy so I think I'll be OK and I can hold a conversation with almost anybody. I have been told it's quite expensive for single guys at clubs and you could walk away with no interaction but honestly so is dating, which is why I stopped that and thought I'd increase my chances with swinging.
I'll take your advice into consideration.
D "
At the very least you'll get to see scantily clad Women, maybe engaging in sexy fun. Anything else is a bonus  |
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Bite the bullet and go. Everyone had a 1st night once.
Pick a night that suits your interests and dive in. Have no expectations to play though. You might, you might not. Be polite, do NOT drink too much. You may think you are the life and soul of rhe party, others will think you are a pissed up knobhead.
If the clubs around you are that selective then go further afield.
I'm a southerner but had a great time at Club F up north. Knew nobody, mentioned on here i was going, chatted to pretty much everyone and had a top night. There are some really friendly people out there.
But unless you walk through the door, you'll never know.
Good luck buddy |
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By *8on33Man 6 weeks ago
winfrith |
"Hi all, never been to a club and I don't seem to be having much interaction via messaging.
I sometimes get a reply but then fizzles after that, am I being to normal? Is asking about somebodies plans weird? I'm new to this so I don't want to be disrespectful and go in with the "nice pussy, let me ruin it" lines.
I've been looking through other threads and seen a lot of advice on going to a club or social but as a single guy I feel like it's very much "first come first serve" or "only if we know you" for some of the clubs in my area.
What advice can anybody give that might help me break the seal and actually finally join in the liberated shinnanigans instead of standing outside looking through the glass?
D X"
The friendlier chatty guys seem to succeed at clubs and as others have said they tend to be expensive for guys especially at weekends, go with no expectations and you may be pleasantly surprised. |
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It's worth keeping an eye out for socials and events.
They're a way to get to know people near you and often will have a club night booked where you don't need to be a member.
I can highly recommend the Mind Matters events at Pandora and IIRC there is a Leeds Social in a couple of weeks.
Much like going to the pub or a nightclub, don't go with the assumption that you will get to play.
Go and chat to people and make some new friends.
If something fun happen, it happens.
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By (user no longer on site) OP 6 weeks ago
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Thank you all so much for the advice I really appreciate it, it looks like the concensus is to bite the bullet and go along for a night. I think I'll just have to man up and take the plunge.
D x |
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Leeds Social
https://m.fabswingers.com/forum/meets/1639069
Mind Matters at Pandora
https://m.fabswingers.com/forum/events/1640237
Hope this helps.
I know Adam & Eve's in Manchester often do £10 Newbie events.
The Attic in Derby and Steel Cliffe in Sheffield don't require membership |
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