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Interest after being knocked back
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By (user no longer on site) OP 19 weeks ago
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Simple question really... Would you meet up with someone on here who shows an interest in you having been knocked back by them before when you approached them? |
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Not sure....its possible that your initial message didn't pique their interet whereas you are showing more of your personality on here?
I guess it would depend on how polite they were in the initial knock back? |
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By *hilloutMan 19 weeks ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
It depends. If the first rejection was clearly lack of interest in a general sense, then no.
If the person, however, states the initial decline was due to other factors at the time and not necessarily a lack of attraction, I can keep an open mind. |
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I can be stubborn but it depends on the original reasoning.
I've had something similar though between names changes where they didn't recognise me and messaged again. They decided against meeting me the first time due to distance and then the second time they denied any recollection in messaging me prior.
Yes, I'm that forgettable. |
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By *mmacdheelsTV/TS 19 weeks ago
France, And sometimes in |
Yes, why not. There are many very genuine reasons why you could have been knocked back first time. But even if the knock back was because of another prearranged meet then after all this a swingers site and that happens. Just be happy that interest has now been shown and go forward if you still like what you see. |
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I’ve thought about this recently. I stumbled across a couple of profiles I had messaged five years ago and still liked the sound of those people. When I messaged them back then they either didn’t read it or weren’t interested in me at the time. But I and my profile have changed massively over the last five years, so their perception of me may well have too.
I’m always willing to have another shot under those circumstances. But if it was someone three months ago who explicitly rejected me, I wouldn’t waste anyone’s time. |
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By *iss.ddWoman 19 weeks ago
Leeds + Newcastle |
It would really depend on why I was knocked back.
For instance, I've said no to meets because the timing / personal situation wasn't right for me and then gone on to have great fun at a later date.
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"Simple question really... Would you meet up with someone on here who shows an interest in you having been knocked back by them before when you approached them?"
Depends. Did you change their mind? If so, yes. Nothing better than convincing someone the error of their initial ways 😂😂 |
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I don’t buy into the whole ‘one chance’ only thing.
I met a lovely person last year, after letting her down a couple of times (real world stuff). She initially said 2 strikes and out, but softened her stance later down the line. We met, and are still in touch now.
If it’s meant to happen, I don’t see an initial no, as concrete ending. |
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Sure. Why not. Loads of reasons why someone might say no or even vanish that are none of my business and I have met with people who said no thanks early on and then connected with again later in different circumstances. |
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Probably not. But I guess it might depend on the reason for the knock back.
If it was a "like you, just not the right time etc" I'd probably be up for chatting again, but if they didn't fancy me then, I wouldn't believe they did now so it'd be a hard no. |
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Thinking about how much our dynamic has evolved while we've been on the site, it would be daft to think what others are looking for hasn't changed too. Maybe we've met in person or, like others have said, they've seen more of our personalities through the forum.
In short, it depends.
B |
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"Why did they knock us back?
Smelly vag
Them or us? 
Hard to tell, it was so overpowering
I see.probably best we don't meet then. A peg on the nose is so unattractive"
Oh I don’t know, few diamanté and a wet wipe for the bits. Problem solved  |
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"Why did they knock us back?
Smelly vag
Them or us?
Hard to tell, it was so overpowering
I see.probably best we don't meet then. A peg on the nose is so unattractive
Oh I don’t know, few diamanté and a wet wipe for the bits. Problem solved "
Nahs, I've gone off the whole hypothetical idea now. It's their hypothetical loss 🙊 |
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By (user no longer on site) 19 weeks ago
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Only if the knock back was for something like they were seeing someone else amd therefore not considering new /additional people... Or had been ill etc
So i guess yes if there was a good reason 
I've got waffle-itis  |
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By *eliWoman 19 weeks ago
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It's not a simple yes or no, far too many factors in play.
I "knocked" someone back before. It wasn't them, it was a reflection of where I was at the time. And then I wasn't that woman any more.
I'm really happy they didn't say no. 🩷 |
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"Only if the knock back was for something like they were seeing someone else amd therefore not considering new /additional people... Or had been ill etc
So i guess yes if there was a good reason
I've got waffle-itis "
Waffles are just pancakes that are ribbed for your pleasure. 😉 |
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Little story for you.
Years ago I had my filters open and messages came in.
It was late, I was tired and being a fussy cunt. Probably because I was tired.
Said no ta to loads of men, but didn't block one particular man, just because.
Fast forward I don't know how long and said man messaged me, when I was feeling more myself and we chatted.
That led to us meeting up at his regularly for a few years.
I met up with him again last year, after losing interest over lockdown (him and me).
Sometimes we might say no just because. |
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I have met some great people at a later date that I didn’t initially match with.
I know from personal experience that what I am looking for can (and does) change over time and I have to assume that applies to other people as well.
The opposite also applies - people you have enjoyed meeting but then you slowly move apart. Things change and that is what makes the site fun. Never say never!
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"Simple question really... Would you meet up with someone on here who shows an interest in you having been knocked back by them before when you approached them?"
It really depends usually I don't like going where I wasn't wanted, however if their was a genuine reason, such as they were seeing someone at the time, or had no availability, then probably I would. |
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By *bi HaiveMan 19 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Simple question really... Would you meet up with someone on here who shows an interest in you having been knocked back by them before when you approached them?"
Yep. Why not?
I've met people in the last year that didn't even read messages I'd sent to them 9 months ago.
Unless it's a knock back that followed a reasonable chat, photo exchange and maybe a coffee social,after which it was clear to them we weren't compatible then why not give a second chance? Messages often don't get read. You never know what's going on in someone's life at any given point. You don't know if circumstances, desires and even preferences have evolved and changed.
An open mind is sometimes better than cutting off your nose to spite your face. |
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By (user no longer on site) 19 weeks ago
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Some people see things very black and white, however, I side more with those who say "it depends". If the knock back was quite emphatic and personal then yes, I would be adding her to my block list, but otherwise... |
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Depends, being knocked back isn't necessarily to do with their perception of you. My life's busy right now and have unfortunately had to cancel arrangements. It sucks, like really sucks. So in that instance I'd be forgiving if their situation had changed.
If they knocked me back because they didn't find me attractive or didn't really like me then no, there'd be no point and I'd be over it.  |
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By (user no longer on site) 19 weeks ago
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I would. I know I have made snap judgements on people on here before,even blocked them. Only to go on to arrange to meet them and one guy been one of the most decent guys I've ever known on here.
People can change their minds.
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Every situation has it's own set of circumstances.
This is a nsa site where people meet in the hope of sex - it's nothing more and feeling hurt and rejected because someone couldn't meet with you only hurts you - no one else
I think that anyone who is butt hurt enough to think 'well you didn't want me before' needs to drop their ego and their tit for tat reactions.
If it's too much of a dent in their pride to meet with someone they find attractive physically and personality wise then they are entitled to be butt hurt and lose out.
Imagine a friend saying ....... no you wouldn't come out with us last week so we are not going out with you this week!!!
I do think people confuse nsa swinging with getting engaged and married. They delude themselves.
Swinging is an attempt to put aside or lose altogether those 'strings' that bind people's attitudes to sex and relationships.
Most, who profess to swing operate by vanilla emotions and standards. |
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Yes, we’d consider it - sometimes it’s wrong timing.
Or maybe their situation has changed now - no longer smoke, not in a relationship, shaved their beard and so on.
Judging by the amount of people who message us again after us saying no to them, then the percentages would be quite high 
K |
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I'd consider it. It depends on how long it'd been but I do think people can change their mind. I have. There were some things I was looking for in a guy before that aren't as important to me now.
It would depend on the person as well but I would give them a second chance. |
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It depends on the circumstances. I was knocked back by someone when I was relatively new here. My profiles improved a lot since then and I got verified more.
I met them in the end and it turned out to be a great meet |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 19 weeks ago
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Sorry everyone, I've been a bad OP in not really reply but I have read every post and it's an interesting mix of opinions as I really thought men would be more forgiving as opportunities are few and far between.
There's also an interesting contrast between pride being a big factor for some and not for others where the can understand the circumstances may not be right. If there were multiple instances of circumstances not being right, at what point would you cut your losses? |
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"Sorry everyone, I've been a bad OP in not really reply but I have read every post and it's an interesting mix of opinions as I really thought men would be more forgiving as opportunities are few and far between.
There's also an interesting contrast between pride being a big factor for some and not for others where the can understand the circumstances may not be right. If there were multiple instances of circumstances not being right, at what point would you cut your losses?"
Even in those circumstances, I’d never fully cut and run. I’d be more inclined to message in a way that leaves the ball in their court to come and find me if their situation allows. If I never hear back, I assume they’ve moved on, and not lose sleep over it. |
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"I would. I know I have made snap judgements on people on here before,even blocked them. Only to go on to arrange to meet them and one guy been one of the most decent guys I've ever known on here.
People can change their minds.
"
Raven meets people😱😱 |
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"Sorry everyone, I've been a bad OP in not really reply but I have read every post and it's an interesting mix of opinions as I really thought men would be more forgiving as opportunities are few and far between.
There's also an interesting contrast between pride being a big factor for some and not for others where the can understand the circumstances may not be right. If there were multiple instances of circumstances not being right, at what point would you cut your losses?
Even in those circumstances, I’d never fully cut and run. I’d be more inclined to message in a way that leaves the ball in their court to come and find me if their situation allows. If I never hear back, I assume they’ve moved on, and not lose sleep over it. "
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"I would. I know I have made snap judgements on people on here before,even blocked them. Only to go on to arrange to meet them and one guy been one of the most decent guys I've ever known on here.
People can change their minds.
Raven meets people😱😱"
I feel like this should be al over the news |
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By *hilloutMan 19 weeks ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
"Every situation has it's own set of circumstances.
This is a nsa site where people meet in the hope of sex - it's nothing more and feeling hurt and rejected because someone couldn't meet with you only hurts you - no one else
I think that anyone who is butt hurt enough to think 'well you didn't want me before' needs to drop their ego and their tit for tat reactions.
If it's too much of a dent in their pride to meet with someone they find attractive physically and personality wise then they are entitled to be butt hurt and lose out.
Imagine a friend saying ....... no you wouldn't come out with us last week so we are not going out with you this week!!!
I do think people confuse nsa swinging with getting engaged and married. They delude themselves.
Swinging is an attempt to put aside or lose altogether those 'strings' that bind people's attitudes to sex and relationships.
Most, who profess to swing operate by vanilla emotions and standards. "
I completely agree, especially with the last statement.
Once more the fab voice of wisdom tells it like it is 😁😉 |
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Yes, I'm not petty. I understand people, women in particular, get bombarded with messages so it is difficult to get through all messages. I've met someone on here before who had over a thousand messages. So I get it.
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By *WB85Man 19 weeks ago
Staffordshire |
Depends why and how it happened.
If it's one of those times you get ghosted or someone simply doesn't turn up, absolutely not.
If there's a genuine reason, then sure.
We all have lives outside of fab. |
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By (user no longer on site) 19 weeks ago
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"I reckon you can judge the biggest egos by the flat nos, you know, not even willing to consider mitigating circumstances  "
Actually, I don’t have an ego because of my flat no.
My No is from experience, I’m on here if they’ve said a flat NO then I accept they are never going to change their mind, so I’ll never ask them again.
But sometimes they just hint that it’s not a good idea right now, and I actually do get along with them, so that no. May turn into a yes sometime. Who knows! If that makes sense.
But do a no does not indicate an ego to me, because my answer wasn’t exactly trying to display that either. It’s just a basic answer because most of the time it’s pointless replying to these things. |
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I think it would depend why they knocked me back.
If it was because they thought I was ugly or too fat then no.
If ir was because they didn't know me very well, but now see how wonderful I am then yes.  |
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By *3nsesMan 19 weeks ago
Dublin |
"Yes. Nearly all my serious previous relationships started with rejection. 😅 I'm like mould, it takes a while for me to grow on someone.
Can i nick this for next years Valentines Cards?? "
Absolutely. It's a guaranteed winner. |
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"No. They think you’re an easy target knowing you’ve had a “thing” for them in the past and they only approach you because nobody else is available. "
But what if they had another reason, say they're attached in the beginning, but no longer are? We never know what is happening in other people's lives do we?
I've been in situations where I am attached, and refused to take up interest from another lady. You never know what is going on. |
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"Simple question really... Would you meet up with someone on here who shows an interest in you having been knocked back by them before when you approached them?"
I would if they said they weren't available or had a good valid excuse. I got knocked back for a job application years ago and I got it the second time and still work there.  |
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"No. They think you’re an easy target knowing you’ve had a “thing” for them in the past and they only approach you because nobody else is available.
But what if they had another reason, say they're attached in the beginning, but no longer are? We never know what is happening in other people's lives do we?
I've been in situations where I am attached, and refused to take up interest from another lady. You never know what is going on."
Only proves my point, thanks. |
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"Simple question really... Would you meet up with someone on here who shows an interest in you having been knocked back by them before when you approached them?"
It depends. If someone gave a definite “no” before then I wouldn’t be interested. But if it was more that our previous messages didn’t go anywhere, or they hadn’t replied, then sure I don’t have a problem trying again. We all get busy and we all change.
There’s people I’m speaking with now who I previously had no interest in. But my type has changed with time, and so have the people in question. |
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"Simple question really... Would you meet up with someone on here who shows an interest in you having been knocked back by them before when you approached them?"
Apologies for being late to the party, but I'd say ‘it depends’. It's probably a simple question, but the answer is probably anything but.
It depends on how/why were you knocked back, whether you still like them, etc.
With a figure like yours, I'm relatively confident that you're not (too) short of offers for meets, unlike tubby ol' me who's far from fanciable, so it depends on whether you still want to meet them. Call me envious! 🤣
If it had happened to me, I'd reconsider it only because I know my chances are very limited, and they're even worse now I'm over 45! 🤣
I guess it's up to you, mate. You could just have a social, see how it goes, then go from there. Maybe they have regrets for initially turning you down. In this case, I'd say do what's best for you, Mr Beans 😁👍 |
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