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Getting to know someone
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"Yes, I would like a friend or two that I can hang with occasionally. But I completely suck at making friends. I like my own company too much, have been out of friend circles for too many years."
I’ll be your friend. |
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By (user no longer on site) 15 weeks ago
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Yeah most definitely. I’d love to meet people and try new experiences but it’s a chore and disheartening when you get nothing. Feels like I can’t compete with everyone else and you’re good enough |
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"Sometimes I struggle to people
I people at work
By the end of the day my tolerance for people is probably lower where it should be
Therefore I don’t impose myself on other people " it is not recognised enough how exhausting socialising is or emotional labour at work |
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"Yes.
It's not worth it.
Fuck people, except without contact.
I would like to guck you. With lots of contact, Swing.
Germy.
I won't kink shame you, but I don't know what gunk means "
Guck *
Me neither though. It should say fuck. |
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"Yes.
It's not worth it.
Fuck people, except without contact.
I would like to guck you. With lots of contact, Swing.
Germy.
I won't kink shame you, but I don't know what gunk means
Guck *
Me neither though. It should say fuck. "
goddamn it I autocarroted myself |
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"Sometimes I struggle to people
I people at work
By the end of the day my tolerance for people is probably lower where it should be
Therefore I don’t impose myself on other people it is not recognised enough how exhausting socialising is or emotional labour at work"
Don’t get me wrong I like people. But there are many a times where I just need to be alone and cycle or ride my motorbike or just sit and read…anything as long as no people 🤣 |
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"Do you ever feel like you want to meet new people but putting yourself out there can be so difficult or such a chore? "
On here?
I’ve learnt I’m not really anyone’s cup of tea so I pretty much keep to myself.
In real life I have a close circle of friends I see daily so feel complete. |
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"Do you ever feel like you want to meet new people but putting yourself out there can be so difficult or such a chore?
On here?
I’ve learnt I’m not really anyone’s cup of tea so I pretty much keep to myself.
In real life I have a close circle of friends I see daily so feel complete. "
If you like short kings, come and find me |
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"Yes, I would like a friend or two that I can hang with occasionally. But I completely suck at making friends. I like my own company too much, have been out of friend circles for too many years.
I’ll be your friend. "
Dude 🤗 |
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"Sometimes I struggle to people
I people at work
By the end of the day my tolerance for people is probably lower where it should be
Therefore I don’t impose myself on other people it is not recognised enough how exhausting socialising is or emotional labour at work"
I'm like this too. So much peopling at work. |
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I don't feel it's a chore but it's very difficult. For reasons I won't go in to here we need to stay localish, this limits who we can meet. I don't just mean on fab, it's true for meeting people in general. Also by the time you're our age most people have established friendships and don't have the time or inclination to make new ones. Younger people tend to go to different places and do different things.
If you join a hobby type club it can be very cliquey.
It's hard |
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"Yes.
It's not worth it.
Fuck people, except without contact."
This, been burned so many times I’ve had enough of people for the rest of my life, no matter how lonely I feel sometimes is better than opening up and getting hurt |
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My young Sirrah, you have the spirit of youth on your side. For me — nobody wants to know. I'm an outcast, a pariah, a misfit, ostracised to the outer reaches of oblivion. Six socials in and not a single verification. I am destite in a realm where verifications are the currency to success/suck-sex.
When I'm seen no one remembers, when I'm absent they all forget. Even in my downward spiral of lamentation it's an uphill struggle to just stay focused.
Mind you, the women on here are pretty fit though. The ladies are even better. And the quality of quims on offer — it's like a smörgåsbord of mouthwatering delights.
Effort is so passé. |
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"My young Sirrah, you have the spirit of youth on your side. For me — nobody wants to know. I'm an outcast, a pariah, a misfit, ostracised to the outer reaches of oblivion. Six socials in and not a single verification. I am destite in a realm where verifications are the currency to success/suck-sex.
When I'm seen no one remembers, when I'm absent they all forget. Even in my downward spiral of lamentation it's an uphill struggle to just stay focused.
Mind you, the women on here are pretty fit though. The ladies are even better. And the quality of quims on offer — it's like a smörgåsbord of mouthwatering delights.
Effort is so passé."
Lies. |
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Getting to know people can be hard. You have the same superficial questions you ask each other, it can be boring and repetitive. I often wonder why bother at all, yet I still crave having some sort of relationship at a meaningful level. Dating sites I think are to blame, people make little effort these days. |
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Here Yes, I go through phases.
It does take a lot of energy and effort to chat to and arrange to meet new people. And then be prepared for new types of relationships forming after meeting and the implications of that.
I don’t think it’s possible to be doing it all the time especially with families, jobs , friends, other relationships to nurture. |
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"My young Sirrah, you have the spirit of youth on your side. For me — nobody wants to know. I'm an outcast, a pariah, a misfit, ostracised to the outer reaches of oblivion. Six socials in and not a single verification. I am destite in a realm where verifications are the currency to success/suck-sex.
When I'm seen no one remembers, when I'm absent they all forget. Even in my downward spiral of lamentation it's an uphill struggle to just stay focused.
Mind you, the women on here are pretty fit though. The ladies are even better. And the quality of quims on offer — it's like a smörgåsbord of mouthwatering delights.
Effort is so passé.
·
Lies."
•
You and me are over. 🏴 |
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"My young Sirrah, you have the spirit of youth on your side. For me — nobody wants to know. I'm an outcast, a pariah, a misfit, ostracised to the outer reaches of oblivion. Six socials in and not a single verification. I am destite in a realm where verifications are the currency to success/suck-sex.
When I'm seen no one remembers, when I'm absent they all forget. Even in my downward spiral of lamentation it's an uphill struggle to just stay focused.
Mind you, the women on here are pretty fit though. The ladies are even better. And the quality of quims on offer — it's like a smörgåsbord of mouthwatering delights.
Effort is so passé.
·
Lies.
•
You and me are over. 🏴"
More lies |
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"My young Sirrah, you have the spirit of youth on your side. For me — nobody wants to know. I'm an outcast, a pariah, a misfit, ostracised to the outer reaches of oblivion. Six socials in and not a single verification. I am destite in a realm where verifications are the currency to success/suck-sex.
When I'm seen no one remembers, when I'm absent they all forget. Even in my downward spiral of lamentation it's an uphill struggle to just stay focused.
Mind you, the women on here are pretty fit though. The ladies are even better. And the quality of quims on offer — it's like a smörgåsbord of mouthwatering delights.
Effort is so passé.
·
Lies.
•
You and me are over. 🏴"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uCGD9dT12C0 |
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" Yep would be nice to just be able to meet up and have good old chin wag and a laugh and of course a moan and groan ...and if anything else happens be a nice brucey bonus xx ps we've got a nice hi fi so could even listen to some tunes lol xx "
That's largely what I'm looking for too,fellowship with the like minded is always good, with or without any sauciness
nice speakers btw |
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In the real world thankfully I find it stupidly easy to meet people. I think I have an approachable face, which is both a blessing (when I'm in a sociable mood and interesting people chat with me) and a curse (you can guarantee every whack-job in a 2 mile radius will hone in on me).
On here it feels like a lot of effort to maintain conversations when what comes back are one line responses (frequently one word responses!) so I tend to let them peter out naturally rather than keep pushing. |
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"My young Sirrah, you have the spirit of youth on your side. For me — nobody wants to know. I'm an outcast, a pariah, a misfit, ostracised to the outer reaches of oblivion. Six socials in and not a single verification. I am destite in a realm where verifications are the currency to success/suck-sex.
When I'm seen no one remembers, when I'm absent they all forget. Even in my downward spiral of lamentation it's an uphill struggle to just stay focused.
Mind you, the women on here are pretty fit though. The ladies are even better. And the quality of quims on offer — it's like a smörgåsbord of mouthwatering delights.
Effort is so passé.
·
Lies.
•
You and me are over. 🏴
·
More lies"
•
Sêê? I cannot even vanquish you without you pushing back. Get the message. |
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"Getting to know people can be hard. You have the same superficial questions you ask each other, it can be boring and repetitive. "
That’s sounds easy! But It it’s not my experience , the complete opposite. |
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Getting to know someone mentally and physically can be a beautiful adventure for both.
Exploring the mind is a journey that I adore to embark on before exploring the physical journey together.
That excites me so much 🥰 |
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By *oxy jWoman 15 weeks ago
somerset |
i have a vast network of friends non swingers and 30++ years has given us loads of swinging friends too ... i dont look for friends as that is a bit plastic / false much rather it just happens face to face i have zero time for online so called friends im not interested in people i wont/dont meet ...
its a massive problem today is social media its made many people lazy with social skills anyone can sit behind a keyboard all day with google as their brain ... but nothing beats that face to face social time ... social mixing is so important yet its happening less and less for some because of social media |
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By *oxy jWoman 15 weeks ago
somerset |
"I tried to write a profile that would appeal to lots of different people….but was honest to myself so changed yesterday and made it about me and if that doesnt appeal then so be it. Im me "
and thats how a profile should be ..about you and what you want ..you will only stand out by being you |
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I would love to make new friends and try to put myself out there but i find it exhausting.
I feel like I need to just end up in the second series of a friendship once all the hard work has been done |
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I went from having dozens and dozens of friends (met online and scattered all over the world but we used to meet up IRL about 3 times a year etc) there was a massive fallout last year and they all disappeared apart from 3 or so.
I had 3 FWBs whom I saw regularly and I kind of lost them all at the same time…. Also last year/beginning of this one.
Last year was SAD and INTENSE.
I’d really like new friends but I keep everyone at arm’s length now. For my own self-preservation. |
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By (user no longer on site) 15 weeks ago
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I really love meeting and being with people when I want to. But they have expectations don’t they…. ….if only people had less or no expectations of each other… |
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"I love getting to know new people. My wife likes to say I could go into an empty room and come out with 3 new friends."
This is me! Though I would say, I would walk out with 3 more acquaintances! I know lots of people but only a few of them are real friends. I treasure them, because like many above, I have been hurt and my trust has been treated like trash! |
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I'd always struggled with making close friends until about 8 years ago. I've since found some amazing people who are ND like me, and relating to them is effortless in a way I didn't know was possible. Knowing that level of connection is a possibility, I'm no longer reticent about putting myself out there, whether or not it goes anywhere. |
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"Do you ever feel like you want to meet new people but putting yourself out there can be so difficult or such a chore? "
Yes absolutely.
I’ve put myself out there on a number of occasions and getting rejected, rebuffed or just plain ignored does take a toll. I’ve decided against going to events, clubs or socials in the past because the expectation is for guys to make the first move and I’m tired of both having to put myself out there and being rejected |
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"I'd always struggled with making close friends until about 8 years ago. I've since found some amazing people who are ND like me, and relating to them is effortless in a way I didn't know was possible. Knowing that level of connection is a possibility, I'm no longer reticent about putting myself out there, whether or not it goes anywhere." I'm ND too, didn't know until a few years ago but it explains some of my long standing friendships! |
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It gets more difficult the older you get to make friends. I've moved around a bit too which hasn't helped. And now where I've settled, most people here have lived in the area all their lives and so have interest in new people.
Plus being a single parent and working mostly from home doesn't help. But I have cats |
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"Do you ever feel like you want to meet new people but putting yourself out there can be so difficult or such a chore? "
It is difficult to meet new people
I need a bit of time to trust someone, to start feeling sexual attraction. Men don’t have patience and just want a quick release then stop talking after you made an effort.
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By *opeyXWoman 15 weeks ago
Dun Dee |
"Do you ever feel like you want to meet new people but putting yourself out there can be so difficult or such a chore? "
Yeah but its why I go to socials, I cba to do the ping pong thing for ages and then finally arrange 1-1 social things, then it not even happen.
I do struggle and get a bit overwhelmed at large organised socials, but there mostly friendly, amazing bunch of people and super interesting to boot! |
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By *opeyXWoman 15 weeks ago
Dun Dee |
"I love meeting new people, however my overthinking brain isn't allowing it right now.
Mrs
That overthinking brain can be so cruel and destructive cant it"
Something I learnt when you overthink would you tell a friend this/also is it a fact? Sometimes helps! |
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It ebbs and flows for me. I could go six months without wanting to see anyone new and then have months where I really enjoy meeting new people.
The main thing that's changed for me is discovering I'm not neurotypical so I don't worry much about not clicking with most people anymore and I really value those I do click with.
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By *YDB75Man 15 weeks ago
East Yorkie |
"I love meeting new people, however my overthinking brain isn't allowing it right now.
Mrs
That overthinking brain can be so cruel and destructive cant it
Something I learnt when you overthink would you tell a friend this/also is it a fact? Sometimes helps! "
Funnily enough i was told that by a therapist |
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"Do you ever feel like you want to meet new people but putting yourself out there can be so difficult or such a chore? "
I did use to think that when younger, I was shy. I've since lost the shyness and most inhibition. The key is be yourself and you will attract the right kind of people |
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"Yes.
It's not worth it.
Fuck people, except without contact.
I would like to guck you. With lots of contact, Swing.
Germy.
I won't kink shame you, but I don't know what gunk means
Guck *
Me neither though. It should say fuck.
goddamn it I autocarroted myself"
|
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"Do you ever feel like you want to meet new people but putting yourself out there can be so difficult or such a chore?
I did use to think that when younger, I was shy. I've since lost the shyness and most inhibition. The key is be yourself and you will attract the right kind of people "
I’m becoming more confident talking to people these days. I talk to people at bus stops or people serving my drink at pubs/ bars and people in the sauna/ steam.
But finding it exhausting remains. I just find interacting with people exhausting. Sometimes I don’t even reply to people on message because I haven’t got the energy for conversation. |
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"I would love to make new friends and try to put myself out there but i find it exhausting.
I feel like I need to just end up in the second series of a friendship once all the hard work has been done"
Devil angel, with legs like yours, I'll be your friend. If my hand wanders onto your thigh, don't worry he's just playing. |
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"Do you ever feel like you want to meet new people but putting yourself out there can be so difficult or such a chore?
I did use to think that when younger, I was shy. I've since lost the shyness and most inhibition. The key is be yourself and you will attract the right kind of people
I’m becoming more confident talking to people these days. I talk to people at bus stops or people serving my drink at pubs/ bars and people in the sauna/ steam.
But finding it exhausting remains. I just find interacting with people exhausting. Sometimes I don’t even reply to people on message because I haven’t got the energy for conversation. "
I'm a bit surprised to hear you say that, we met at one of your socials, I thought you were quite sociable actually. Maybe you are underestimating yourself |
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"No. If I want to interact with people I will. Sometimes I don't have the energy to give but I never feel like I want to but also don't.
You're an odd one Pickle. "
Tell me something I don’t know. |
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We all go through periods where we can't be arsed to meet people. But when I want to I'm quite good at it now, but I wasn't when younger. My point is, it's a learned habit, for those who feel awkward, you can learn to get better at it with practice. |
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No. I prefer to be alone most of the time and have a really lovely life. When I’m in the mood to be sociable I’ll plan it and enjoy the day. But I’m then happy to go back to my quiet time. I don’t want or need a big circle so I’m very careful who I let close. |
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By *929Man 15 weeks ago
newcastle |
"Do you ever feel like you want to meet new people but putting yourself out there can be so difficult or such a chore? "
Yes I’d love to eventually meet someone to be with and build a good life eith but honestly can’t be fucking bothered to look I’m happy with my little routine of work and gym and just enjoying peace and being alone at night time |
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"Do you ever feel like you want to meet new people but putting yourself out there can be so difficult or such a chore? "
No.
You don't get jack shit done in online spaces.
Go where people are, start conversations and the rest is history. If they don't wanna talk, let them walk.....but you'd be shocked how many do want to. There's a lot of lonely people out there |
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By (user no longer on site) 15 weeks ago
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As an introvert I find it difficult. I'm pretty crap at small talk unless I force myself to do it and find large groups a nightmare. I'm happy being on my own most of the time fortunately x |
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By *HUSH-Man 15 weeks ago
London |
I like meeting new people but I’ve definitely found as I’ve gotten older it’s more difficult to be in social situations where that takes place. A lot of my friends have settled down now, some have moved away and others have work commitments. I had very little free time in my previous job so I was difficult to pin down too.
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I like meeting new people, and one of the perks of travelling with work is meeting new people. Old.friends used to joke that wherever we went, I would bump into someone I knew, if when they mentioned where they lived the other person would say "Do you know Wil.."
That said; I don't always need my friends around me,and I can fill me time on my own quite happily |
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I’d love to meet someone and live happily ever after but can’t be bothered with the hassle of dating. I’ve lived by myself for a long time now and think it would be hard to share my space with someone again. |
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