FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Zero or Friends only pics
Zero or Friends only pics
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By *eyeY OP Couple 11 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
Honestly we ignore profiles like this.
Question is, apart from the obvious fantasists and pic hunters, why do many (as we've experienced) expect you'll engage with them?
Understand being discreet and feel we are.
Take this month alone, we've been winked by one of D's ex colleagues (face pics, and he's still friends with him on Facebook) he had a current (bragging) colleague actually show him our profile, claiming to have met "them" (he winked and messaged..)
He's still completely ignorant to fact it is us and we swing, because I don't fancy him and it'd be too close if I did!
D's response was akin to "cool story!"
But conversely, Pictureless profiles messaging, sending requests and fabbing..
Does anyone actually respond? No soapbox preaching, we just find it weird..   |
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As a guy playing solo ( im in an open marraige to a gorgeous and sexy woman) i find this is the major stumbling block. When i can get a positive response from a couple they insist on a face pic but dont reciptocate or even respond to say im not for them. Im an adult and accept im not for everyone and i dont expect anything except manners i dont need to be ghosted. Im do find the word search they insist on to find the hidden password in thier profile amusing though, passes the time |
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I have messaged pictureless profiles in the past but only ones that have been photo verified, have a written bio or meet verifications so I know they are real. I send a face pic on first message, some get read, some don’t, most deleted. Would be nice to get a reply but I know that women’s profiles will get hundreds of winks, messages etc without anything written so it would be foolish to think they could reply to every message. If mine get read but they don’t reply, I remove my pics from message then delete. Used to bother me at first, now it doesn’t. |
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I delete any message if the profile doesn't have one public pic.There's absolutely nothing to attract me to them.
We can all add something that won't identify us to others that may know us in real life.
Most of us want to remain private. |
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I used to have a few pictures but they got used by others - mainly the ones with women in them of course. That’s reason in my case I now have no pictures. I understand that does not work for many on here. However I keep to this now and still have some fun with some |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 11 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
"I need physical attraction so I need a picture."
Yup! How many excuses have you had as to why they "can't"
Utter bollox!
Frankly if the guy who works with D every day doesn't recognise him/us, bloody unlikely anyone else will (well apart from those we've fucked of course)  |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 11 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
"I delete any message if the profile doesn't have one public pic.There's absolutely nothing to attract me to them.
We can all add something that won't identify us to others that may know us in real life.
Most of us want to remain private. "
Ditto! We've also had the friends request tribe of course.. You accept and are greeted with pictures of a close up boob, pussy or cock. Thanks for that and unfriend |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 11 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
"No pics - no response.
Time is precious I want to know if there's at least some aesthetic attraction before engaging in conversation.
Mrs "
You mean you won't respond to "How are you?" Or "free tonight?"  |
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By (user no longer on site) 11 weeks ago
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I'm not meeting right now, but when I was, I would always ensure face pics were exchanged in the first couple of messages. If I'm not attracted to their face, then there won't be any sex happening.
I also have the filter up that says if someone doesn't have public photos, they can't message me ... but it doesn't work |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 11 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
"As a guy playing solo ( im in an open marraige to a gorgeous and sexy woman) i find this is the major stumbling block. When i can get a positive response from a couple they insist on a face pic but dont reciptocate or even respond to say im not for them. Im an adult and accept im not for everyone and i dont expect anything except manners i dont need to be ghosted. Im do find the word search they insist on to find the hidden password in thier profile amusing though, passes the time"
Evidently we're guilty of said word search and frankly many who quote also attach pictures, telling us they have read our profile.. So won't be worrying if you find it amusing.
However to ghost after someone does include pictures on request is rude, you're right!  |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 11 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
"I'm not meeting right now, but when I was, I would always ensure face pics were exchanged in the first couple of messages. If I'm not attracted to their face, then there won't be any sex happening.
I also have the filter up that says if someone doesn't have public photos, they can't message me ... but it doesn't work "
Yes!! We tried that filter too x |
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"No pics - no response.
Time is precious I want to know if there's at least some aesthetic attraction before engaging in conversation.
Mrs
You mean you won't respond to "How are you?" Or "free tonight?" "
Strangely no |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 11 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
"Can I just ask, those saying that face pics are a must in a first message... If you message first, I assume you all attach face pics in that message too? "
Yes we do! Seem to be in the minority mind. Left visible for 48ish hours and if not reciprocal we delete them. |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 11 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
"I don't mind as long as someone attaches them in a message - but if they've no public ones, I would want several varied photos attaching to a message. "
The dark indiscernible ones or sunglasses mostly.. |
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No pics no response seems to be pretty standard. We respect privacy, nobody needs to post faces pics if they don't want to, but you can post SOMETHING surely if you're expecting some interaction? But hey ho, their profile their choice. |
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By (user no longer on site) 11 weeks ago
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"Honestly we ignore profiles like this.
Question is, apart from the obvious fantasists and pic hunters, why do many (as we've experienced) expect you'll engage with them?
Understand being discreet and feel we are.
Take this month alone, we've been winked by one of D's ex colleagues (face pics, and he's still friends with him on Facebook) he had a current (bragging) colleague actually show him our profile, claiming to have met "them" (he winked and messaged..)
He's still completely ignorant to fact it is us and we swing, because I don't fancy him and it'd be too close if I did!
D's response was akin to "cool story!"
But conversely, Pictureless profiles messaging, sending requests and fabbing..
Does anyone actually respond? No soapbox preaching, we just find it weird.. "
I do but sometimes I get bored. I'm more attracted to the mind behind the pics... after all, I met The Redhead on IRC. |
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"I don't mind as long as someone attaches them in a message - but if they've no public ones, I would want several varied photos attaching to a message.
The dark indiscernible ones or sunglasses mostly.. "
Oh god yes they're as bad as no pics - I can see you have a head and shoulders, great! |
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We spent a year ‘dating’ a lady who didn’t have pictures on her profile. She was very private - and also a ballet dancer and very beautiful. Not all pictureless profiles are fake or time wasters (but most of them probably are), some people are just nervous about putting themselves out there. However, you need to be very good at written communication to compensate for it. x |
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Even weirder can be the ones who wink you yet their profile is set to hidden...
Or he obviously completely blag photos of some porn star thats been downloaded and makes it to number one on the hot photos page
They are two strange ones for us! |
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We don’t ever respond to people with no pics - to me, they are either hiding or they know pics would reduce their chances instead of enhance.
FAB is hard so I don’t think someone should be trying to make it harder!
K |
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No pics, friends only pics, or only photos of close up genitals I don't even read the messages. I like to get an idea of someone from their profile and before I engage in conversation, and you can do that without showing your face if you want to remain discreet. |
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By (user no longer on site) 11 weeks ago
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What about those who work in sensitive positions? I've met detectives, policemen and serving army officers. I can understand their reluctance to post public pictures. |
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"What about those who work in sensitive positions? I've met detectives, policemen and serving army officers. I can understand their reluctance to post public pictures. "
Face pics, yes totally agree.
But I'm sure people can have a pic of something that shows them off, but doesnt identify them.
I work in a public facing role & have not yet been correctly recognised. |
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"Can I just ask, those saying that face pics are a must in a first message... If you message first, I assume you all attach face pics in that message too?
Yes we do! Seem to be in the minority mind. Left visible for 48ish hours and if not reciprocal we delete them."
I would agree that you are in a minority (and it is great that you do that)
It's a peculiarity of sites like Fab that the majority want to hold on to their anonymity whilst (effectively) insisting that others give theirs up, just to be even considered for an initial conversation
... and the best of it is, people do
I mean I have my face pic on show, primarily cos I'm past worrying what people think of others being sexual beings - plus I don't have a job that is public facing and I don't have kids |
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By (user no longer on site) 11 weeks ago
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What i find more alarming is someones showing your profile to who he believes is a "vanilla couple" , thankfully this time it was actually you and not another collegue , id be wondering who else has he been showing it too .
Its poor taste , lack of discretion and akin to revenge porn (just without it being shared online) but bringing it too the attention of others ,
Does he not realise the distress that could cost someone. |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 11 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
"What about those who work in sensitive positions? I've met detectives, policemen and serving army officers. I can understand their reluctance to post public pictures. "
We have not shared D's line of work.. |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 11 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
"Can I just ask, those saying that face pics are a must in a first message... If you message first, I assume you all attach face pics in that message too?
Yes we do! Seem to be in the minority mind. Left visible for 48ish hours and if not reciprocal we delete them.
I would agree that you are in a minority (and it is great that you do that)
It's a peculiarity of sites like Fab that the majority want to hold on to their anonymity whilst (effectively) insisting that others give theirs up, just to be even considered for an initial conversation
... and the best of it is, people do
I mean I have my face pic on show, primarily cos I'm past worrying what people think of others being sexual beings - plus I don't have a job that is public facing and I don't have kids"
Absolutely agreed, 'we want to see yo, but you can't see us' hmmm. We have kids. One is in her 20's and my job is public facing and in an arena that it would be frowned upon.. Mr |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 11 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
"What i find more alarming is someones showing your profile to who he believes is a "vanilla couple" , thankfully this time it was actually you and not another collegue , id be wondering who else has he been showing it too .
Its poor taste , lack of discretion and akin to revenge porn (just without it being shared online) but bringing it too the attention of others ,
Does he not realise the distress that could cost someone."
He only showed me, but yes distasteful even if he did know.. He's under the impression that I trust him.. Fool! Besides Y said I work with him, not that I like him. The lifestyle has been discussed derogatorily in front of me a few times and I merely shrug and say "each to their own'  I think Y was trying to illustrate the point that we have many pictures and are still not recognised.. Mr x |
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By (user no longer on site) 11 weeks ago
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"What i find more alarming is someones showing your profile to who he believes is a "vanilla couple" , thankfully this time it was actually you and not another collegue , id be wondering who else has he been showing it too .
Its poor taste , lack of discretion and akin to revenge porn (just without it being shared online) but bringing it too the attention of others ,
Does he not realise the distress that could cost someone.
He only showed me, but yes distasteful even if he did know.. He's under the impression that I trust him.. Fool! Besides Y said I work with him, not that I like him. The lifestyle has been discussed derogatorily in front of me a few times and I merely shrug and say "each to their own' I think Y was trying to illustrate the point that we have many pictures and are still not recognised.. Mr x"
The point i was getting at if hes showing them to you under the assumption he doesnt know its you , who else has he shown them too x |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 11 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
"What i find more alarming is someones showing your profile to who he believes is a "vanilla couple" , thankfully this time it was actually you and not another collegue , id be wondering who else has he been showing it too .
Its poor taste , lack of discretion and akin to revenge porn (just without it being shared online) but bringing it too the attention of others ,
Does he not realise the distress that could cost someone.
He only showed me, but yes distasteful even if he did know.. He's under the impression that I trust him.. Fool! Besides Y said I work with him, not that I like him. The lifestyle has been discussed derogatorily in front of me a few times and I merely shrug and say "each to their own' I think Y was trying to illustrate the point that we have many pictures and are still not recognised.. Mr x
The point i was getting at if hes showing them to you under the assumption he doesnt know its you , who else has he shown them too x"
Got that, don't think he's alone though I know of the male half of a couple showing friends only pics of Y to his mates down the pub.. suffice to say we don't have anything more to do with them.. |
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"We spent a year ‘dating’ a lady who didn’t have pictures on her profile. She was very private - and also a ballet dancer and very beautiful. Not all pictureless profiles are fake or time wasters (but most of them probably are), some people are just nervous about putting themselves out there. However, you need to be very good at written communication to compensate for it. x"
This!
Tbh I used to have public pics on show, but the barrage of messages (moreso than having none) made me think twice about doing that again
Polite respectful people get added as a friend, but I really don't lose sleep or give a fuck about anyone that cares that I don't have any public pics on show |
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Totally agree. I literally cannot understand what the point is of having a profile on here and messaging people if you are not going to have public photos (Or at the very least, attach them in your message). Any winks, invites, or messages from profiles without public pics (and even without multiple pics) are typically an immediate delete for me (and no, I’m not adding you as a friend just to see the friends only pics lol) :shrug: |
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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago
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I know that I'm in the minority here but I'm genuinely interested in the mind behind the posts.
Some people are very protective of their face pics, for a variety of reasons, myself included.
I've seen individuals doxxed, humiliated on Facebook and had their images and/or videos re-appropriated and re-purposed.
I understand the need for privacy, especially at this time when it is at its most fragile state.
I don't know who runs this site or how the data is collected and processed but the 90s IT nerd in me gets very suspicious about things like this.
And... anyone working with sensitive material or are in law enforcement, the medical community or national defense have very obvious reservations about sending anything That can be detected by face recognition software.
Now, I don't personally care one way or another and I'm very good at remaining anonymous but I'm not going to put my face out there to anyone to look at and copy.
And I don't expect the same from those who message me. |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 10 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
Not at all! You as anyone is entitled to reveal as little or as much as they want. The point has been missed by some who posted and messaged directly (Fuck only knows why).. Bluntly if messaging us to chat or meet either have pictures or send.. Piss off expecting us to accept the friend request or engage without attraction  |
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