FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Gentlemen: Do you ask her out?
Gentlemen: Do you ask her out?
Jump to: Newest in thread
I often find myself chatting to women at some length, for many weeks, sometimes leading to a month or, occasionally, several months.
However, I always find that I am the one who eventually asks them out for a social, be it a coffee, a fleeting luncheon or a romantic date comprising of dinner.
And when I do ask them out they accept without hesitation. They are agreeable, they are amenable and they give off vibes which resemble '''we should have done this much sooner!'''.
Am I alone in this? Ladies do you ever instigate or suggest taking things further from beyond the written correspondence to actually meeting? If not why not? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I think when the dynamic has that quality of mutually enjoyable conversation, it is somewhat arbitrary who asks first.
It tends to emerge in intriguing ways e.g.
Are you suggesting we should meet?
I'm not sure if that was your suggestion or mine at this point, but I would like to meet you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Most of the time it's me doing the asking! Sometimes distance prevents me from suggesting something as time is a very finite resource, so occasionally I'm not the first to propose a coffee or a day at the zoo. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'm quite happy to suggest going for a drink. Now asking if someone wants to play in a club is another thing  "
•
I totally get that might be a different type of scenario. Is asking someone to play on the first meet quite daunting?
For clarification my thread is about non-sexual meets (in the first instance).  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I’m surprised Nero. I personally avoid protracted messaging especially if it’s someone I want to meet. I usually ask if they’d like to meet socially as quickly as possible once a rapport and interest has been established,
I enjoy the physical presence, body language, chat, flirting… I find the endless back and forth messaging stupefying |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think when the dynamic has that quality of mutually enjoyable conversation, it is somewhat arbitrary who asks first.
It tends to emerge in intriguing ways e.g.
Are you suggesting we should meet?
I'm not sure if that was your suggestion or mine at this point, but I would like to meet you."
•
I'm a great fan of sensual diplomacy. I quite like this! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By *eliWoman 35 weeks ago
. |
If I'm genuinely interested in someone, then yes I'd happily ask them out. Be that an actual romantic date (the joy of being poly), a coffee or whatever.
But... it's only if I'm certain the answer would be a yes. If they (gender aside) have given me hope it's reciprocated.
And if I'm not having a wobble phase.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'm quite happy to suggest going for a drink. Now asking if someone wants to play in a club is another thing
•
I totally get that might be a different type of scenario. Is asking someone to play on the first meet quite daunting?
For clarification my thread is about non-sexual meets (in the first instance). "
The non-sexual - I've no issues asking at all. You can get a good feel from a bit of chatting as to whether or not you'll be happy to sit across a table from someone. One of the reasons I don't like to play until another occasion is that it creates a no pressure environment and that's much less nerve racking.
I very rarely play at the same time as a social - the odd occasion I have it's a one thing led to another scenario and always after talking for that bit longer in advance. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Most of the time it's me doing the asking! Sometimes distance prevents me from suggesting something as time is a very finite resource, so occasionally I'm not the first to propose a coffee or a day at the zoo. "
•
I am rejuvenated at this response, dear Nell. What about an årt gållery? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 35 weeks ago
|
"Most of the time it's me doing the asking! Sometimes distance prevents me from suggesting something as time is a very finite resource, so occasionally I'm not the first to propose a coffee or a day at the zoo.
•
I am rejuvenated at this response, dear Nell. What about an årt gållery?"
A day at the zoo is a great idea.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Most of the time it's me doing the asking! Sometimes distance prevents me from suggesting something as time is a very finite resource, so occasionally I'm not the first to propose a coffee or a day at the zoo.
•
I am rejuvenated at this response, dear Nell. What about an årt gållery?"
That would be wonderful  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Most of the time it's me doing the asking! Sometimes distance prevents me from suggesting something as time is a very finite resource, so occasionally I'm not the first to propose a coffee or a day at the zoo.
•
I am rejuvenated at this response, dear Nell. What about an årt gållery?
A day at the zoo is a great idea. "
If, like me, you're the type of person who requires a certain level of friendship in order to progress things further, a day out together is very enjoyable. I've been to 3 zoos with Fab friends so far |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I’m surprised Nero. I personally avoid protracted messaging especially if it’s someone I want to meet. I usually ask if they’d like to meet socially as quickly as possible once a rapport and interest has been established,
I enjoy the physical presence, body language, chat, flirting… I find the endless back and forth messaging stupefying"
•
Oh, I am completely in resonance with you. I am now veering towards expediting my meets and forgoing long, drawn-out protracted conversations. Sometimes they are symptomatic of the geographical disparities; most of the women I meet are 100s of miles away (London should be ashamed of itself).
Long distance penmanship is so passé. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I prefer to secretly find out where they live and just turn up with no pants.
You have to make an effort on here."
•
Make sure you turn up with a paper cup filled with coffee (or Mulled Wine). There's nothing worse than a wasted journey. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"If I'm genuinely interested in someone, then yes I'd happily ask them out. Be that an actual romantic date (the joy of being poly), a coffee or whatever.
But... it's only if I'm certain the answer would be a yes. If they (gender aside) have given me hope it's reciprocated.
And if I'm not having a wobble phase. "
•
Mèlí, romantic dates are back in fashion. We are the troubadours for this trend and long forgotten art. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'm quite happy to suggest going for a drink. Now asking if someone wants to play in a club is another thing
•
I totally get that might be a different type of scenario. Is asking someone to play on the first meet quite daunting?
For clarification my thread is about non-sexual meets (in the first instance).
The non-sexual - I've no issues asking at all. You can get a good feel from a bit of chatting as to whether or not you'll be happy to sit across a table from someone. One of the reasons I don't like to play until another occasion is that it creates a no pressure environment and that's much less nerve racking.
I very rarely play at the same time as a social - the odd occasion I have it's a one thing led to another scenario and always after talking for that bit longer in advance. "
•
Thank you for this, my delicate Crimson.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Sometimes I ask but usually just continue the conversation until it fizzles out and they move on  "
•
These women will never know what a gentleman they missed out on. They will go to their graves with bitter regret.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"The women that do are the exception rather than the rule."
Well, I am exceptional.
To answer you Nerø, I ask. I've asked. I think I might have been the one to invite YOU for luncheon, though you chose the venue |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eliWoman 35 weeks ago
. |
"If I'm genuinely interested in someone, then yes I'd happily ask them out. Be that an actual romantic date (the joy of being poly), a coffee or whatever.
But... it's only if I'm certain the answer would be a yes. If they (gender aside) have given me hope it's reciprocated.
And if I'm not having a wobble phase.
•
Mèlí, romantic dates are back in fashion. We are the troubadours for this trend and long forgotten art. "
Are you though? Or are you Eliza Doolittle-ing a social?
I'm sorry, still tickles me. I like romantic dates. I'm currently planning one very happily. Albeit slowly. I like when I feel comfortable enough to ask someone.
What I really like is when it doesn't matter who asks the other. The interest is there and it all sort of... flows. Beautifully. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"The women that do are the exception rather than the rule.
Well, I am exceptional.
To answer you Nerø, I ask. I've asked. I think I might have been the one to invite YOU for luncheon, though you chose the venue "
I take it back! I suggested both lunch AND the venue  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Most of the time it's me doing the asking! Sometimes distance prevents me from suggesting something as time is a very finite resource, so occasionally I'm not the first to propose a coffee or a day at the zoo.
•
I am rejuvenated at this response, dear Nell. What about an årt gållery?
A day at the zoo is a great idea. "
•
I hereby authorise you to organise the first Fab Menagerie Social! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I prefer to secretly find out where they live and just turn up with no pants.
You have to make an effort on here.
•
Make sure you turn up with a paper cup filled with coffee (or Mulled Wine). There's nothing worse than a wasted journey."
Nero buddy I'm a gentleman.. I always have a box of wine in the car |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 35 weeks ago
|
"I often find myself chatting to women at some length, for many weeks, sometimes leading to a month or, occasionally, several months.
However, I always find that I am the one who eventually asks them out for a social, be it a coffee, a fleeting luncheon or a romantic date comprising of dinner.
And when I do ask them out they accept without hesitation. They are agreeable, they are amenable and they give off vibes which resemble '''we should have done this much sooner!'''.
Am I alone in this? Ladies do you ever instigate or suggest taking things further from beyond the written correspondence to actually meeting? If not why not?"
I almost always ask first...im the impatient sort  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 35 weeks ago
|
"Sometimes I ask but usually just continue the conversation until it fizzles out and they move on
•
These women will never know what a gentleman they missed out on. They will go to their graves with bitter regret. "
I tell myself that every day |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"The women that do are the exception rather than the rule.
Well, I am exceptional.
To answer you Nerø, I ask. I've asked. I think I might have been the one to invite YOU for luncheon, though you chose the venue "
•
I'm still brain-fogged from the three hefty scoops of cholesterol laden ice cream, KC². |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I prefer to secretly find out where they live and just turn up with no pants.
You have to make an effort on here.
•
Make sure you turn up with a paper cup filled with coffee (or Mulled Wine). There's nothing worse than a wasted journey.
·
Nero buddy I'm a gentleman.. I always have a box of wine in the car"
•
A box or a carton? You know, the one with the small plastic tap to dispense the wine through dribbles? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I prefer to secretly find out where they live and just turn up with no pants.
You have to make an effort on here.
•
Make sure you turn up with a paper cup filled with coffee (or Mulled Wine). There's nothing worse than a wasted journey.
Nero buddy I'm a gentleman.. I always have a box of wine in the car"
No flask of tea??  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I prefer to secretly find out where they live and just turn up with no pants.
You have to make an effort on here.
•
Make sure you turn up with a paper cup filled with coffee (or Mulled Wine). There's nothing worse than a wasted journey.
Nero buddy I'm a gentleman.. I always have a box of wine in the car
No flask of tea?? "
I could be convinced to add supplies |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I prefer to secretly find out where they live and just turn up with no pants.
You have to make an effort on here.
•
Make sure you turn up with a paper cup filled with coffee (or Mulled Wine). There's nothing worse than a wasted journey.
·
Nero buddy I'm a gentleman.. I always have a box of wine in the car
•
A box or a carton? You know, the one with the small plastic tap to dispense the wine through dribbles? "
Carton and reusable plastic cups, my rizz is not environmentally friendly |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
From my singles and couples profile it's usually me that asks for the social but that's because I like to do it quickly, I need the in person experience to know if I want to go further.
However I don't meet men so haven't asked one of those out. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 35 weeks ago
|
" Do you ask her out?"
Nero, can you be more specific? Who is this 'her' that you speak of?
If you provide us with her name, we can see about asking her out.
Thank you in anticipation.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ddie1966Man 35 weeks ago
Paper Town Central, Essex. |
I do ask and have been told I should have asked sooner, but I'm notoriously poor at reading another person.
I find it nice and refreshing for a lady to ask and very, very rare for me to decline.... even if its only for a coffee. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I often find myself chatting to women at some length, for many weeks, sometimes leading to a month or, occasionally, several months.
However, I always find that I am the one who eventually asks them out for a social, be it a coffee, a fleeting luncheon or a romantic date comprising of dinner.
And when I do ask them out they accept without hesitation. They are agreeable, they are amenable and they give off vibes which resemble '''we should have done this much sooner!'''.
Am I alone in this? Ladies do you ever instigate or suggest taking things further from beyond the written correspondence to actually meeting? If not why not?
·
I almost always ask first...im the impatient sort "
•
We need more of your calibre on Fab. Indeed, more of your calibre in the South East. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Sometimes I ask but usually just continue the conversation until it fizzles out and they move on
•
These women will never know what a gentleman they missed out on. They will go to their graves with bitter regret.
·
I tell myself that every day "
•
It will be your epitaph. † |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
" Do you ask her out?
Nero, can you be more specific? Who is this 'her' that you speak of?
If you provide us with her name, we can see about asking her out.
Thank you in anticipation. "
•
Where shall I begin? It's her¹, her², her³, ... ... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I tend to beat around the proverbial bush and hope they make the first move. The fear of rejection and all that. So it's very rare for me to instigate anything."
•
I can completely understand that, hence the reticence in some people.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I do ask and have been told I should have asked sooner, but I'm notoriously poor at reading another person.
I find it nice and refreshing for a lady to ask and very, very rare for me to decline.... even if its only for a coffee."
•
Similarly, I've been told that I'm not assertive enough. Women are the mazes in this world of uncertainty, hard to decipher and hard to unravel.
We desire the labia, not the labyrinth. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 35 weeks ago
|
"I often find myself chatting to women at some length, for many weeks, sometimes leading to a month or, occasionally, several months.
However, I always find that I am the one who eventually asks them out for a social, be it a coffee, a fleeting luncheon or a romantic date comprising of dinner.
And when I do ask them out they accept without hesitation. They are agreeable, they are amenable and they give off vibes which resemble '''we should have done this much sooner!'''.
Am I alone in this? Ladies do you ever instigate or suggest taking things further from beyond the written correspondence to actually meeting? If not why not?
·
I almost always ask first...im the impatient sort
•
We need more of your calibre on Fab. Indeed, more of your calibre in the South East."
You can't beat Yorkshire calibre |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *essTTWoman 35 weeks ago
Birmingham |
"I often find myself chatting to women at some length, for many weeks, sometimes leading to a month or, occasionally, several months.
However, I always find that I am the one who eventually asks them out for a social, be it a coffee, a fleeting luncheon or a romantic date comprising of dinner.
And when I do ask them out they accept without hesitation. They are agreeable, they are amenable and they give off vibes which resemble '''we should have done this much sooner!'''.
Am I alone in this? Ladies do you ever instigate or suggest taking things further from beyond the written correspondence to actually meeting? If not why not?"
Most of the time I'm speaking to someone for a while on here it's me that suggests meeting
Some of them get nervous suggesting and are intimated by me, which is silly because I'm a sweet heart |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 35 weeks ago
|
I did. I asked one guy repeatedly to meet, and we talked for months, probably over a year actually. But he always just brushed it off. And another guy always had a reason why he couldn't. And they were both definitely real well known forum users with plenty of veris.
So I don't anymore. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I did. I asked one guy repeatedly to meet, and we talked for months, probably over a year actually. But he always just brushed it off. And another guy always had a reason why he couldn't. And they were both definitely real well known forum users with plenty of veris.
So I don't anymore. "
I’ve had that too with one particular guy, now I only ask once, after that it’s on them to ask |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I do, it's likely I'll lose interest if the other party hasn't asked to meet after a couple of weeks. I don't have the patience for months of conversation."
•
I always thought of you as a woman of conviction. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I often find myself chatting to women at some length, for many weeks, sometimes leading to a month or, occasionally, several months.
However, I always find that I am the one who eventually asks them out for a social, be it a coffee, a fleeting luncheon or a romantic date comprising of dinner.
And when I do ask them out they accept without hesitation. They are agreeable, they are amenable and they give off vibes which resemble '''we should have done this much sooner!'''.
Am I alone in this? Ladies do you ever instigate or suggest taking things further from beyond the written correspondence to actually meeting? If not why not?
·
I almost always ask first...im the impatient sort
•
We need more of your calibre on Fab. Indeed, more of your calibre in the South East.
You can't beat Yorkshire calibre "
•
Are you on draught or bottled? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *aseylee324Couple 35 weeks ago
Valley of Squinting Windows |
"If I interested in meeting someone, I have no problem with suggesting it
•
Is that just an aspiration or have you truly asked people out?  "
On fab? Yes. In real life, I've never gotten there first |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"...Most of the time I'm speaking to someone for a while on here it's me that suggests meeting
Some of them get nervous suggesting and are intimated by me, which is silly because I'm a sweet heart "
•
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 35 weeks ago
|
It's that tentative, am I being pushy by asking thought that always crosses my mind, is it too soon etc. That said a 'fuck it, someone has to suggest it' normally wins out.
Being asked out by a woman is however sexy as hell |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Yes I do, especially if we are getting along and I know I have free time coming up
•
Truthfully, Ms. Shådy? Are you telling porkie pies? 
·
To you Nero, never. So you fancy a FafFrappe sometime? "
•
I say to hell with the woo'ing and the flirts and just made a rendezvous for the bedchamber!  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I did. I asked one guy repeatedly to meet, and we talked for months, probably over a year actually. But he always just brushed it off. And another guy always had a reason why he couldn't. And they were both definitely real well known forum users with plenty of veris.
So I don't anymore. "
•
JÅG, I cannot believe RTG spurned your amorous advances! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I can ask or I can hint that it’s time to ask me out. I prefer when the guy shows initiative though as I’m more into face to face meets than endless texting"
•
Would you ever take a leap of faith and ask outright yourself? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
We ask early on when you start chatting and realise there’s a spark between us - we would chat and chat and chat as soon enough you probably friendzone each other.
Although myself and C chatted for about 2 months before we had chance to meet.
K |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 35 weeks ago
|
"I did. I asked one guy repeatedly to meet, and we talked for months, probably over a year actually. But he always just brushed it off. And another guy always had a reason why he couldn't. And they were both definitely real well known forum users with plenty of veris.
So I don't anymore.
•
JÅG, I cannot believe RTG spurned your amorous advances! "
It turns out he does have standards.
Dam it.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think making your interest obvious helps the other person have the confidence to make a move, either way around. "
•
When, throughout history and through the passages of time, has a gentleman never been so obvious about his intentions, his desires and his interests to the opposite sex? They have always been keen, eager, impressionable and malleable to most aspects of courtship. But they also need some confidence instilled by women and not just the other way around. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *B69Woman 35 weeks ago
Wiltshire |
"If I’ve been chatting with someone and got on and an opportunity arises then yes I would ask.
•
May I ask, when was the last time you asked with eager anticipation?  "
Last week and it had a positive outcome |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"It's that tentative, am I being pushy by asking thought that always crosses my mind, is it too soon etc. That said a 'fuck it, someone has to suggest it' normally wins out.
Being asked out by a woman is however sexy as hell"
•
Ladies, this isn't some empty arrogance; it's truly a wonderful feeling. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"We ask early on when you start chatting and realise there’s a spark between us - we would chat and chat and chat as soon enough you probably friendzone each other.
Although myself and C chatted for about 2 months before we had chance to meet.
K"
•
If I could have half of what you both have I would be all the richer for it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I did. I asked one guy repeatedly to meet, and we talked for months, probably over a year actually. But he always just brushed it off. And another guy always had a reason why he couldn't. And they were both definitely real well known forum users with plenty of veris.
So I don't anymore.
•
JÅG, I cannot believe RTG spurned your amorous advances!
It turns out he does have standards.
Dam it."
·
There's a man out there, somewhere, holding a beacon that shines for you. Failing that there's a St Bernard with a keg full of Rum. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"If I’ve been chatting with someone and got on and an opportunity arises then yes I would ask.
•
May I ask, when was the last time you asked with eager anticipation?
·
Last week and it had a positive outcome"
•
Gutted. Well and truly.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *B69Woman 35 weeks ago
Wiltshire |
"If I’ve been chatting with someone and got on and an opportunity arises then yes I would ask.
•
May I ask, when was the last time you asked with eager anticipation?
·
Last week and it had a positive outcome
•
Gutted. Well and truly. "
You owe me a glass of bubbles so next time I’m in town you will get my call
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 35 weeks ago
|
I always have a bit of a fear of rejection so find that if we're chatting and getting along, I don't want to make things awkward by asking and them saying no. I eventually get to the point of asking but do wish more women would do it too |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I’m surprised Nero. I personally avoid protracted messaging especially if it’s someone I want to meet. I usually ask if they’d like to meet socially as quickly as possible once a rapport and interest has been established,
I enjoy the physical presence, body language, chat, flirting… I find the endless back and forth messaging stupefying"
I am with this |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I wonder whether there have been occasions when I have been asked, but I've been too dense to recognise it? I do know that when I'm in person with someone, I find it hard to interpret flirting signals.
Ladies, if I'm talking with you online and you want to take it further, please just ask me outright in no uncertain terms. And if we've met in a social way and you'd like to turn it into more, then don't just stroke my arm or give me come on looks - lean in and kiss me, or whatever else might make your desires totally obvious. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"If I’ve been chatting with someone and got on and an opportunity arises then yes I would ask.
•
May I ask, when was the last time you asked with eager anticipation?
·
Last week and it had a positive outcome
•
Gutted. Well and truly.
You owe me a glass of bubbles so next time I’m in town you will get my booty call "
•
Booty call? Oh my. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I always have a bit of a fear of rejection so find that if we're chatting and getting along, I don't want to make things awkward by asking and them saying no. I eventually get to the point of asking but do wish more women would do it too"
I've heard you mention this before, Joe. I think there is that slightly unnerving fear of rejection in us all.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I always have a bit of a fear of rejection so find that if we're chatting and getting along, I don't want to make things awkward by asking and them saying no. I eventually get to the point of asking but do wish more women would do it too
I've heard you mention this before, Joe. I think there is that slightly unnerving fear of rejection in us all. "
I don’t really see it as rejection - more a clarification that she isn’t into me. The sooner you find out the better in my view. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I always have a bit of a fear of rejection so find that if we're chatting and getting along, I don't want to make things awkward by asking and them saying no. I eventually get to the point of asking but do wish more women would do it too
I've heard you mention this before, Joe. I think there is that slightly unnerving fear of rejection in us all.
·
I don’t really see it as rejection - more a clarification that she isn’t into me. The sooner you find out the better in my view. "
•
Agreed.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *B69Woman 35 weeks ago
Wiltshire |
"If I’ve been chatting with someone and got on and an opportunity arises then yes I would ask.
•
May I ask, when was the last time you asked with eager anticipation?
·
Last week and it had a positive outcome
•
Gutted. Well and truly.
You owe me a glass of bubbles so next time I’m in town you will get my booty call
•
Booty call? Oh my. "
Haha I see what you did there |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 35 weeks ago
|
"I always have a bit of a fear of rejection so find that if we're chatting and getting along, I don't want to make things awkward by asking and them saying no. I eventually get to the point of asking but do wish more women would do it too
I've heard you mention this before, Joe. I think there is that slightly unnerving fear of rejection in us all.
I don’t really see it as rejection - more a clarification that she isn’t into me. The sooner you find out the better in my view. "
That's a good way to look at things and probably better to establish early than drawing it out |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
If I'm interested, I ask. I occasionally have a crash of over-exposure / am I fucking the sense of chase
But it's swallowed quick as I get on best with folk who are being as they are, and yeah if I want to touch you I'll ask |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Sometimes I ask but usually just continue the conversation until it fizzles out and they move on
•
These women will never know what a gentleman they missed out on. They will go to their graves with bitter regret.
I tell myself that every day "
Russ, can I call you Russ? Goodo...as I feel at 53 ¼ I may not be long for this world, would you like to accompany me on a non romantic or sexual date? I don't want to die bitter about the fact I never made any kind of effort to ask you out, even though there has never been any conversation between us, we could still feel a fizzle. No is a perfectly acceptable answer. I have no shame or real feelings so no harm done. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"If I'm interested, I ask. I occasionally have a crash of over-exposure / am I fucking the sense of chase But it's swallowed quick as I get on best with folk who are being as they are, and yeah if I want to touch you I'll ask "
If I found myself wandering in your neck of the woods I would *definitely* ask you out. Or in.
Or at least I would if I could. As it is I’d have to cross my fingers and hope you noticed me. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"If I'm interested, I ask. I occasionally have a crash of over-exposure / am I fucking the sense of chase But it's swallowed quick as I get on best with folk who are being as they are, and yeah if I want to touch you I'll ask
If I found myself wandering in your neck of the woods I would *definitely* ask you out. Or in.
Or at least I would if I could. As it is I’d have to cross my fingers and hope you noticed me. "
Alas, so far to reach T |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think when the dynamic has that quality of mutually enjoyable conversation, it is somewhat arbitrary who asks first.
It tends to emerge in intriguing ways e.g.
Are you suggesting we should meet?
I'm not sure if that was your suggestion or mine at this point, but I would like to meet you.
•
I'm a great fan of sensual diplomacy. I quite like this!"
I like your terminology, it's seems very apt. Start as one means to proceed. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"If I'm interested, I ask. I occasionally have a crash of over-exposure / am I fucking the sense of chase
But it's swallowed quick as I get on best with folk who are being as they are, and yeah if I want to touch you I'll ask "
•
Thank you for this insight. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Sometimes I ask but usually just continue the conversation until it fizzles out and they move on
•
These women will never know what a gentleman they missed out on. They will go to their graves with bitter regret.
I tell myself that every day
Russ, can I call you Russ? Goodo...as I feel at 53 ¼ I may not be long for this world, would you like to accompany me on a non romantic or sexual date? I don't want to die bitter about the fact I never made any kind of effort to ask you out, even though there has never been any conversation between us, we could still feel a fizzle. No is a perfectly acceptable answer. I have no shame or real feelings so no harm done. "
•
This most fortunate chap, who goes by the name of Russ, is in for a ride of his life! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Sometimes I ask but usually just continue the conversation until it fizzles out and they move on
•
These women will never know what a gentleman they missed out on. They will go to their graves with bitter regret.
I tell myself that every day
Russ, can I call you Russ? Goodo...as I feel at 53 ¼ I may not be long for this world, would you like to accompany me on a non romantic or sexual date? I don't want to die bitter about the fact I never made any kind of effort to ask you out, even though there has never been any conversation between us, we could still feel a fizzle. No is a perfectly acceptable answer. I have no shame or real feelings so no harm done.
•
This most fortunate chap, who goes by the name of Russ, is in for a ride of his life!"
Have we met? Enchanté |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *mf123Man 35 weeks ago
with one foot out the door |
I dont anymore i just natter not thru nerves or awt like that im just no longer chasing orgasms anymore so i feel it would be unfair to get there hopes up that id put my hand up em |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
