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Carry on with a new sentence

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By *obilebottom OP   Man 4 days ago

All over

I looked at the clock and it was still only just after 4 o'clock in the morning.

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By *vgloryholebs16TV/TS 4 days ago

Bristol.

...and Rishi Sunak had just lost his seat..

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan 4 days ago

A den in the Glen

To a pensioner on a bus

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By *obilebottom OP   Man 4 days ago

All over

[Removed by poster at 04/07/24 18:57:44]

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By *avinaTVTV/TS 4 days ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"Have a cigar", said Ché Guevara, passing me a stogie while handing out Green Party fliers...

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By *hubs101Man 4 days ago

West Midlands

To use as a tissue to blow my nose on

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By *atureshyMan 4 days ago

Near there.

[Removed by poster at 04/07/24 19:04:26]

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By *atureshyMan 4 days ago

Near there.

To which the purple people eater quickly made origami swans.

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By *orny PTMan 4 days ago

Peterborough

it was a big one, that bogey was.

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By *lynJMan 4 days ago

Morden

But it was a necessary component of the train

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By *orny PTMan 4 days ago

Peterborough

unlike the strewn seat hogging newspaper.

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By *d4fun73Man 4 days ago

Shipley

I don't remember that film?!

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By *rPunxMan 4 days ago

Hull

Cried out the man in anguish

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By *punk n gushCouple 4 days ago

Walmer,

[Removed by poster at 04/07/24 20:57:02]

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By *punk n gushCouple 4 days ago

Walmer,

As he stepped on a cactus

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By *het 345Man 4 days ago

Preston

Which was strange in Antarctica.

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By *poolGuyMan 4 days ago

Liverpool

Whilst sipping mezcal.

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 4 days ago

St Leonards


"As he stepped on a cactus, which went right up his arsehole, until that very same cactus was removed by poster at 04/07/24 20:57:02]"

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By *jj2012Man 4 days ago

Barry

I just wish I knew where I was

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman 4 days ago

King's Crustacean

and when anyone wishes a genie appears and this was a genie with an exceptionally large clock

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By *8on33Man 4 days ago

winfrith

bah bah black sheep have you any wool was expressed in a squeaky singing voice

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By *punk n gushCouple 4 days ago

Walmer,


"bah bah black sheep have you any wool was expressed in a squeaky singing voice "

So I can knit some willy warmers for you all

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By *ittleBoPeepingWoman 4 days ago

Galway, Clare


"bah bah black sheep have you any wool was expressed in a squeaky singing voice

So I can knit some willy warmers for you all "

But I did and they were all too big

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By *punk n gushCouple 4 days ago

Walmer,


"bah bah black sheep have you any wool was expressed in a squeaky singing voice

So I can knit some willy warmers for you all

But I did and they were all too big"

What the willy's or the warmers lol

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By *aGaGagging for itCouple 4 days ago

Newcastle upon Tyne


"bah bah black sheep have you any wool was expressed in a squeaky singing voice

So I can knit some willy warmers for you all

But I did and they were all too big

'What the willy's or the warmers?' lol"

..Asked the lady on the 49 bus

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By *avinaTVTV/TS 3 days ago

Transsexual Transylvania


"bah bah black sheep have you any wool was expressed in a squeaky singing voice

So I can knit some willy warmers for you all

But I did and they were all too big

'What the willy's or the warmers?' lol

..Asked the lady on the 49 bus"

...suppressing her jealousy at her sister, who was a regular on the 69.

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By *orphia2003Woman 3 days ago

Tonypandy.

All the way to cockfosters.

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By *ormerWelshcouple2020Man 3 days ago

Stourbridge

Foster, on the other hand, wasn’t ready for all the attention, so….

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By *ittleBoPeepingWoman 3 days ago

Galway, Clare


"Foster, on the other hand, wasn’t ready for all the attention, so…."

with immense attention to detail they..

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By *ormerWelshcouple2020Man 3 days ago

Stourbridge


"Foster, on the other hand, wasn’t ready for all the attention, so….

with immense attention to detail they.."

Started to construct a sec swing made from Meccano and left over leather from the ……

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By *auls21Man 3 days ago

Derry


"Foster, on the other hand, wasn’t ready for all the attention, so….

with immense attention to detail they..

Started to construct a sec swing made from Meccano and left over leather from the ……"

Gimp outfit they had made last month for …

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By *vmarisaTV/TS 3 days ago

Motherwell

Donald Trump

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By *ormerWelshcouple2020Man 3 days ago

Stourbridge

Meanwhile,

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By *orphia2003Woman 3 days ago

Tonypandy.

In a disused basement, a hooded figure filled a suitcase with monopoly money

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By *Isca_xMan 3 days ago

Herts / London / Beyond

How they earned it would shock even the most open-minded of people ...

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By *reeSpiritElleWoman 3 days ago

Near the Beach

But they had no choice ... the ransom needed to be paid!

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By *uri00620Woman 3 days ago

Croydon


"But they had no choice ... the ransom needed to be paid! "

But then they remembered a cheese sandwich they'd forgotten about upstairs, who could resist that?

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By *maginitivemindMan 3 days ago

East Mids

It curled upwards jutting the air, the stale cheese sandwich that is

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By *ittleBoPeepingWoman 3 days ago

Galway, Clare


"Foster, on the other hand, wasn’t ready for all the attention, so….

with immense attention to detail they..

Started to construct a sec swing made from Meccano and left over leather from the ……"

Bondage gear they found in..

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By *ot to giggleWoman 3 days ago

Coventry


"Foster, on the other hand, wasn’t ready for all the attention, so….

with immense attention to detail they..

Started to construct a sec swing made from Meccano and left over leather from the ……

Bondage gear they found in.."

along with a very curly cheese sandwich

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By *maginitivemindMan 3 days ago

East Mids

Who doesn’t like to be tied up blindfolded and fed a stale cheese sandwich,thought the Vegetarian dominatrix

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By *ot to giggleWoman 3 days ago

Coventry

especially if its soft squigy cheese

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By *rPunxMan 3 days ago

Hull

Although it seemed like a cheesy substance the molecular makeup wasn't actually cheese

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By *ittleBoPeepingWoman 3 days ago

Galway, Clare


"Although it seemed like a cheesy substance the molecular makeup wasn't actually cheese"

In fact it seemed to have more of a fish smell than a cheese smell...

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 3 days ago

St Leonards


"Although it seemed like a cheesy substance the molecular makeup wasn't actually cheese

In fact it seemed to have more of a fish smell than a cheese smell..."

And when the crusty scab was peeled away, a foul-smelling cupful of yellow-green pus oozed out over his fingers.

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By *ittleBoPeepingWoman 3 days ago

Galway, Clare


"Although it seemed like a cheesy substance the molecular makeup wasn't actually cheese

In fact it seemed to have more of a fish smell than a cheese smell...

And when the crusty scab was peeled away, a foul-smelling cupful of yellow-green pus oozed out over his fingers. "

He was in pus heaven..

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By *uri00620Woman 3 days ago

Croydon


"Although it seemed like a cheesy substance the molecular makeup wasn't actually cheese

In fact it seemed to have more of a fish smell than a cheese smell...

And when the crusty scab was peeled away, a foul-smelling cupful of yellow-green pus oozed out over his fingers.

He was in pus heaven.."

Never mind all that he thought at last, there's jobs to be done...

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 3 days ago

St Leonards


"Never mind all that he thought at last, there's jobs to be done..."

So he sat on the loo, a tad disappointed there were no TVs in it, and curled out two enormous, steaming big jobs.

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 3 days ago

St Leonards

And all of a sudden the nice people came back and started talking about pizza and friendly doggies they've seen that day...

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By *ot to giggleWoman 3 days ago

Coventry


"And all of a sudden the nice people came back and started talking about pizza and friendly doggies they've seen that day..."

while the pus ooozed and dripped off his fingers and ran down his legs, he so wanted to lick it off

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By *hubs101Man 3 days ago

West Midlands


"And all of a sudden the nice people came back and started talking about pizza and friendly doggies they've seen that day...

while the pus ooozed and dripped off his fingers and ran down his legs, he so wanted to lick it off "

Not realising it wasn't mayonnaise

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By *8on33Man 3 days ago

winfrith

then it dripped onto the table where his cat fiddles lapped it up but

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By *ot to giggleWoman 3 days ago

Coventry


"then it dripped onto the table where his cat fiddles lapped it up but "

the cat convulsed and shook violently - then it hawked and hewwed and spat out the biggest, greenest, slimest fur ball

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By *hubs101Man 3 days ago

West Midlands


"then it dripped onto the table where his cat fiddles lapped it up but

the cat convulsed and shook violently - then it hawked and hewwed and spat out the biggest, greenest, slimest fur ball"

Which rolled across the floor collecting fluffy on the way

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By *hubs101Man 3 days ago

West Midlands


"then it dripped onto the table where his cat fiddles lapped it up but

the cat convulsed and shook violently - then it hawked and hewwed and spat out the biggest, greenest, slimest fur ball

Which rolled across the floor collecting fluffy on the way"

Fluff

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 3 days ago

St Leonards


"then it dripped onto the table where his cat fiddles lapped it up but

the cat convulsed and shook violently - then it hawked and hewwed and spat out the biggest, greenest, slimest fur ball

Which rolled across the floor collecting fluffy on the way

Fluff"

Hey I loved Fluffy more - that slimey fur ball has achieved intelligence and intent

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By *ot to giggleWoman 3 days ago

Coventry


"then it dripped onto the table where his cat fiddles lapped it up but

the cat convulsed and shook violently - then it hawked and hewwed and spat out the biggest, greenest, slimest fur ball

Which rolled across the floor collecting fluffy on the way

Fluff

Hey I loved Fluffy more - that slimey fur ball has achieved intelligence and intent "

as it rolled, Fluffy was quickly texting other aliens

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By *uri00620Woman 3 days ago

Croydon


"then it dripped onto the table where his cat fiddles lapped it up but

the cat convulsed and shook violently - then it hawked and hewwed and spat out the biggest, greenest, slimest fur ball

Which rolled across the floor collecting fluffy on the way

Fluff

Hey I loved Fluffy more - that slimey fur ball has achieved intelligence and intent "

He paused for a moment realising what he said -even more bizarrely he didn't even own a cat.

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By *ittleBoPeepingWoman 3 days ago

Galway, Clare


"then it dripped onto the table where his cat fiddles lapped it up but

the cat convulsed and shook violently - then it hawked and hewwed and spat out the biggest, greenest, slimest fur ball

Which rolled across the floor collecting fluffy on the way

Fluff

Hey I loved Fluffy more - that slimey fur ball has achieved intelligence and intent

He paused for a moment realising what he said -even more bizarrely he didn't even own a cat. "

And it was clear Fluffy had been taken over by an actual alien as everyone knows cats can't text due to a lack of opposable thumbs..

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 3 days ago

St Leonards


"then it dripped onto the table where his cat fiddles lapped it up but

the cat convulsed and shook violently - then it hawked and hewwed and spat out the biggest, greenest, slimest fur ball

Which rolled across the floor collecting fluffy on the way

Fluff

Hey I loved Fluffy more - that slimey fur ball has achieved intelligence and intent

He paused for a moment realising what he said -even more bizarrely he didn't even own a cat.

And it was clear Fluffy had been taken over by an actual alien as everyone knows cats can't text due to a lack of opposable thumbs.."

Aliens?

You rang?

Stated Nicky, whilst calculating the DNA code for opposable cat thumbs in his plan to take over the world...

MWAH-HAH-HAH-HAAAAAAHHHHHH...

I mean Meow-ow-ow-owwwwwww

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By *rPunxMan 2 days ago

Hull

And so the furball then knitted themselves into a single mitten as there quite enough to make a pair

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By *melia DominaTV/TS 2 days ago

Edinburgh (She/Her)

And beamed up to thier pussy shaped space craft...

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 2 days ago

St Leonards

"Make it so" said Captain Dickhard, as Totty hit the clit-switch for klunge factor 12.

"Our mission is to seed all the arseholes in the universe, but it's a race against The Klingons"

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By *tYourPleasure_80Man 2 days ago

Newcastle/Leeds/Manchester

So they flew to Westminster at warp speed

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 2 days ago

St Leonards

Stopping off to bum King Charlie on the way, because he had a terrible case of The Klingons.

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