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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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need your views fab peeps... someone said to me recently when i was talking about a potential new relationship,filled with doubts.." where there are doubts, there s no doubt" ....what s your views? did you have doubts when you met your other half? did you work through them? or did you soon realise doubts were founded? |
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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
it depends what the doubts are to be honest.
If I was doubting big issues that could be deal breakers, then Id be very wary of going forward... if its little doubts, then I'd likely work through them...
But as a caveat - I'm pretty much terminally single... was married, but have never been in love - don't really get what its all about - think that bit was missing when they made me. Not very good for giving relationship advice |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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never been in love huh? lucky you
doubts about whether we ll work out in the long run, doubt whether we are actually suited....the only non doubts are in the bedroom...wish i could do the fwb thing but i m passed it now ;( |
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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
Can you see yourself with this guy discussing paint colours in b&q on a sunday? If you can, then theres hope for it (I'm not saying that is the highlight of being in a couple, but if you can see the mundane things and be happy, thats a good indicator)
If you have very little in common, it might be a case of opposites attract or it might be a case of bore each other to tears.
Is it lucky to have never been in love? I've always felt I was missing out on something pretty damn special... |
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To be honest in the whole of my life ive never met someone and thought oh id like to get into a relationship with them. The relationships have come from spending more time with that person until eventually ive realized im in a relationship with them. If i met someone and had doubts i certainly wouldnt be taking it furteher. Its supposed to be all hearts and roses when you meet someone if your starting out on a relationship with doubts i think its doomed from the word go |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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well i fall in love at the drop of a hat and it s pretty painful ;(
discussing colours would defo be fine...the mundane things would be in fact...maybe there is the problem! |
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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
so you're already worried about being bored? You need to work out if thats because you are relaxed and comfortable with this person, or because there is no passion - ones good, the other no so lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"so you're already worried about being bored? You need to work out if thats because you are relaxed and comfortable with this person, or because there is no passion - ones good, the other no so lol "
lol nooo i don t think i d bored with him, well not when we are together anyway, grrr it s so.hard to explain without putting it all out there! see he s a bit of a geek, well a proper geek actually and he doesn t 'communicate' the same way normal guys do for instance (no passion/sexiness in his text messages for instance...not even a X!) but that being said he may be more genuine that most guys out there? amyway i don t feel right airing all this in public (he s obviously not on here of course)...just trying to get my head straight whether to listen to my doubts or not  |
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Don't mistake love for lust. Or excitement. Like the above post says, small doubts about little things can be worked through. Major doubts like 'am I doing the right thing?' I would advise addressing before things get too deep or too far along. Especially if you are on here. It's a lifestyle when in a couple that only emotionally string people can do. You may be. Could he handle it? Could you choose between swinging and monogamy if that choice was given to you as an 'all or nothing' choice?
I really don't know. I can tell you the most sound strong and loved up relationship can, over time, change..... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Steve you know i m only here for the banter these days so that side doesn t worry me.
think i ve sussed what the problem is now...i m extremely passionate and deep, he is...well a geek, passionate indeed but about geeky stuff (apart from.in.the bedroom mind) hence the doubts...but then sometimes opposite attracts? |
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"Steve you know i m only here for the banter these days so that side doesn t worry me.
think i ve sussed what the problem is now...i m extremely passionate and deep, he is...well a geek, passionate indeed but about geeky stuff (apart from.in.the bedroom mind) hence the doubts...but then sometimes opposite
attracts?"
I'd choose someone passionate over something than someone with little interest in anything. It shows spirit. A sense of life. Doesn't matter if he's geeky as long as he's good in bed. Besides which, he's probably into sci-fi so can't be that bad  |
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hmm diamond, just what i thought..
