FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Should I or shouldn’t I?
Should I or shouldn’t I?
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP 34 weeks ago
|
Me & my now (ex) partner broke up recently, we were together 4 years. The relationship was really great, intimate & very sexy! Relationship cut off due to both of us battling with our own inner demons, both came to an agreement to call it off on good terms.
She has suggested we have “ONE MORE NIGHT” together, of fun, intimacy & everything in between.
I feel slightly conflicted??? We both clearly got feelings for one another, but both far too stubborn to admit it.
Do I give her a good seeing too & a goodbye or is it a bad idea? 
FYI I feel like I’m writing to Dear Deidre here  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Do it! What could possibly go wrong? Apart from emotional damage, lingering doubt, upset and heartache.
Things are over or they're not. Someone will get hurt unless you both have the intention of getting back together. If you do both get help for your 'demons' |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It's a bad idea.
But what else have you both got going on?
If nothing better, do it.
You might even get back together, and that will probably be shit too.
But if you've got nothing else going on, at least the shit will fill your time until you DO get something better going on. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ripfillMan 34 weeks ago
Paris, New York, Hong Kong and Havant |
Have you thought about seeing a councillor who is an expert on relationships
It may exozise those inner demons ?
Create a new platform from which you can both work from
A councillor is a neutral objective person |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 34 weeks ago
|
If you're already over thinking the whole scenario now and already in two minds about it, it's not worth it and will be much more of a head fuck afterwards.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I don't hold with the belief that they are an ex for a reason and should stay that way.
If you have feelings and it's two way then there's no reason not to try again. Hopefully you'll both have learnt a lesson from the break up and can move forward this time, I know I'd try. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Do it. Her.
Life without phases of excruciating emotional and mental misery, self doubts and resentment isn’t a life well lived. Pogo on that landmine. Gargle that chainsaw. Get that NOW TV subscription.
Or walk away. Maintaining your mental peace. Probably. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ucka39Man 34 weeks ago
Newcastle |
Go for it, it might give you both a chance to discuss other things and get past those demons
Somethings/some people happen for a valid reason and able to rebuild everything
Do plenty of talking and hopefully you both get what you both want
Good luck  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Do it, if you both want to have sex with each other, there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s intimacy with a 4 year history. The fact you can both get along, walk away afterwards and be apart but still be friendly is wonderful. Some of us just aren’t designed or compatible to be together all the time but that doesn’t stop you having some great sex |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *xmfrvnMan 34 weeks ago
Stoke-on-Trent |
"Do it. Her.
Life without phases of excruciating emotional and mental misery, self doubts and resentment isn’t a life well lived. Pogo on that landmine. Gargle that chainsaw. Get that NOW TV subscription.
Or walk away. Maintaining your mental peace. Probably. "
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eliWoman 34 weeks ago
. |
If you've ended it on good terms and you think you can still have sex and those good terms not change? Why not meet and chat? See how things are?
Personally I couldn't do it. Once I've sent that "it's not working" message, probably before that any sexual attraction I felt has long since vanished. It sounds different for you though OP. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Is it out of the question to help each other get over your respective inner demons? "
I think so because he wants to 'give her a good seeing to and say goodbye '. Unless that's a form of exorcism... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
|
"Me & my now (ex) partner broke up recently, we were together 4 years. The relationship was really great, intimate & very sexy! Relationship cut off due to both of us battling with our own inner demons, both came to an agreement to call it off on good terms.
She has suggested we have “ONE MORE NIGHT” together, of fun, intimacy & everything in between.
I feel slightly conflicted??? We both clearly got feelings for one another, but both far too stubborn to admit it.
Do I give her a good seeing too & a goodbye or is it a bad idea?
FYI I feel like I’m writing to Dear Deidre here "
Do tell us  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
|
"Me & my now (ex) partner broke up recently, we were together 4 years. The relationship was really great, intimate & very sexy! Relationship cut off due to both of us battling with our own inner demons, both came to an agreement to call it off on good terms.
She has suggested we have “ONE MORE NIGHT” together, of fun, intimacy & everything in between.
I feel slightly conflicted??? We both clearly got feelings for one another, but both far too stubborn to admit it.
Do I give her a good seeing too & a goodbye or is it a bad idea?
FYI I feel like I’m writing to Dear Deidre here "
You already know the answer...
It's impossible to have a platonic relationship when there is part intimacy and still an attraction. Even if you've decided to split, that's a head decision and the heart doesn't always agree.
You mentioned inner demons so I think you'll be playing with fire. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
|
"Me & my now (ex) partner broke up recently, we were together 4 years. The relationship was really great, intimate & very sexy! Relationship cut off due to both of us battling with our own inner demons, both came to an agreement to call it off on good terms.
She has suggested we have “ONE MORE NIGHT” together, of fun, intimacy & everything in between.
I feel slightly conflicted??? We both clearly got feelings for one another, but both far too stubborn to admit it.
Do I give her a good seeing too & a goodbye or is it a bad idea?
FYI I feel like I’m writing to Dear Deidre here "
Nope don’t do it as it will cause drama  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Ah, is this the now stalker ex??
In that case, I'm guessing the answer to this thread was you did, OP!
The green arrow shows a very interesting relationship with said ex  "
I'm just going to whizz back in time and reply to this thread telling the OP to leave well alone. It will end in tears, mark my words. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Ah, is this the now stalker ex??
In that case, I'm guessing the answer to this thread was you did, OP!
The green arrow shows a very interesting relationship with said ex
I'm just going to whizz back in time and reply to this thread telling the OP to leave well alone. It will end in tears, mark my words."
*Fires up the DeLorean* |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ookie46Woman 30 weeks ago
Deepest darkest Peru |
"Ah, is this the now stalker ex??
In that case, I'm guessing the answer to this thread was you did, OP!
The green arrow shows a very interesting relationship with said ex
I'm just going to whizz back in time and reply to this thread telling the OP to leave well alone. It will end in tears, mark my words.
*Fires up the DeLorean*"
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
|
"Do it you will regret if you don’t
He'll regret it if he does. Don't ask me how I know, but I have a funny feeling about this one.
The pesky green arrow"
I must correct my wording
The pesky fab green arrow, no connection to any other arrow  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
|
Don't do it.
It will turn into angry sex and it won't be good for either of you. You'll just be going through the motions and the wrong emotions may make themselves come to the surface. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 29 weeks ago
|
"Me & my now (ex) partner broke up recently, we were together 4 years. The relationship was really great, intimate & very sexy! Relationship cut off due to both of us battling with our own inner demons, both came to an agreement to call it off on good terms.
She has suggested we have “ONE MORE NIGHT” together, of fun, intimacy & everything in between.
I feel slightly conflicted??? We both clearly got feelings for one another, but both far too stubborn to admit it.
Do I give her a good seeing too & a goodbye or is it a bad idea?
FYI I feel like I’m writing to Dear Deidre here "
Discipline, say no. Set boundaries.
I recently ended 8 year marriage and would shudder at the thought of "one more time". Stirs up the wrong feelings and you will both feel "used".
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 29 weeks ago
|
"Unlos.
Hopefully he took good the good advice. "
I was hoping for an update myself and agree he should stay well clear no point ruining his potential at real happiness for a few minuets of head fuck |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
. It will just mess you up 