"Does swinging change your expectations on a normal date?
Do you switch modes or is there no difference?
Should have been your!"
That just confuses it 
My expectations of a date are limited to meeting someone and hopefully having a nice couple of hours. Nothing more |
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"Does swinging change your expectations on a normal date?
Do you switch modes or is there no difference?"
I think you have to slow down a little and not be so direct sometimes, just enjoy getting to know them. I did 11 dates once without sex , I had a date yesterday, I met her again this morning, still no plans for sex. These kinds of things don’t happen to me on fab dates.
But like with anything - read the room |
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By *eliWoman 12 weeks ago
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Well I'm not a swinger and don't really go in for the swinging thing. However...
I don't have expectations. I don't have sex the first time I meet someone - probably about three times in all the many years I've been on here.
It's so nice when someone makes the effort to really date me. Have a date. You can tell the difference between those who are more... swinging minded and I prefer those who aren't. I think I'm going to really enjoy myself.  |
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I haven't dated for over forty years. If god forbid I ever did again I'd just say what I want from a relationship from the start. If it was just a one off drinks and dinner sort of thing the conversation wouldn't get that deep |
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"The other thing I was thinking about was once you've bedded them , do you do try out your tricks you've learned from the swinging world?
I've missed this memo. I haven't learned any tricks  "
This OP is willing to show you his  |
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"The other thing I was thinking about was once you've bedded them , do you do try out your tricks you've learned from the swinging world?
I've missed this memo. I haven't learned any tricks
This OP is willing to show you his "
He he |
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"Does swinging change your expectations on a normal date?
Do you switch modes or is there no difference?"
No difference. It's just people. They are the same whatever app you meet them from. No expectations at all, ever. Just hopefully a nice time with good company and if it goes somewhere else, great. |
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"Does swinging change your expectations on a normal date?
Do you switch modes or is there no difference?"
I guess it does for me now I think about it - swinging makes me more direct, be it online, in clubs or private meets - saves time and you need to know what each other wants.
Dating which I am also actively trying to do I am very much more reserved - the amount of men that will start a conversation using language/content they would never ask a stranger on the street is shocking...I'm a very sexual person and for me to have a healthy relationship I'll need an active sex life but I don't like having that be the one and only focus of someone talking to me in a dating sense...I have this life for all that until I find the right person.
Overall I've found being involved in the lifestyle has helped me so much more be content being single Until I find the right person, taken away so much stress being able to satisfy myself or go to a club and be social and who knows what will happen 
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By *elloWoman 12 weeks ago
alpha centauri |
I don't think I've ever had a date , 1 boyfriend I met in a club and shagged him that night.
Another boyfriend who probably was more of a fwb than a real boyfriend I met in a swingers club and we played there.
Oh another I met in a club, didn't have sex, then a few days later arranged to meet him in a pub for drinks, got very d*unk and when my mum came to pick me up I had him pushed up against a wall hands and mouth all over him maybe that was a date . All this is over 23 years ago , I don't think I'd know how to date a normal vanilla person in a regular environment |
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The last proper date I went on was during my kink phase where, for some unknown reason, I was still active on dating sites too.
He asked what I was into, I rattled off my usual list "no kids, no pets, no scat, no blood, no extreme pain, otherwise it's up for discussion".
There was a very long silence, then he said "no, I meant like hobbies, do you like movies or watch telly or like sports".
Unsurprisingly we didn't see each other again. |
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"The last proper date I went on was during my kink phase where, for some unknown reason, I was still active on dating sites too.
He asked what I was into, I rattled off my usual list "no kids, no pets, no scat, no blood, no extreme pain, otherwise it's up for discussion".
There was a very long silence, then he said "no, I meant like hobbies, do you like movies or watch telly or like sports".
Unsurprisingly we didn't see each other again."
Oops |
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"The other thing I was thinking about was once you've bedded them , do you do try out your tricks you've learned from the swinging world?
I've missed this memo. I haven't learned any tricks
This OP is willing to show you his "
Will it be pulling a rabbit out of a hat or sawing a lady in half ? |
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"The other thing I was thinking about was once you've bedded them , do you do try out your tricks you've learned from the swinging world?
I've missed this memo. I haven't learned any tricks
This OP is willing to show you his
Will it be pulling a rabbit out of a hat or sawing a lady in half ? "
I do have a magic wand! |
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I don’t think it changes expectations because I always have none.
The conversation isn’t as open though and I don’t often enjoy ‘normal’ dates which is probably why I haven’t been on one in a while! |
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The differents is
Date end goal to be together
Fab meet to see if you click and are on the same page and want the same thing with out being official.
Sex and relationship are very different things.
But there are some things that are the same. You can still care for someone off fab but you go home and do your own thing without answering to the other. It is a fine line but it's about being honest with each other.
My rule is check in before you meet up again. Check out if its getting to full on. |
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