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I started a new job today.....

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By *illan-Killash OP   Man 13 weeks ago

London/Sussex/Surrey/Berks/Hants

To cut a long story short, I'm an Editor.

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By *lowupdollTV/TS 13 weeks ago

S. Herts

My mate rang and said call me Spinal Cord. I said I’m busy I’ll call you back.

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By *iz78Woman 13 weeks ago

wirral

Congratulations OP

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By *ellhungvweMan 13 weeks ago

Cheltenham

Well done OP. That’s something to write home about.

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 13 weeks ago

St Leonards


"To cut a long story short, I'm an Editor."

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 13 weeks ago

St Leonards


"My mate rang and said call me Spinal Cord. I said I’m busy I’ll call you back. "

Awful.

And genius x

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By *lowupdollTV/TS 13 weeks ago

S. Herts


"My mate rang and said call me Spinal Cord. I said I’m busy I’ll call you back.

Awful.

And genius x"

it’s Thursday. I’m running out of jokes.

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By *ot to giggleWoman 13 weeks ago

Coventry


"My mate rang and said call me Spinal Cord. I said I’m busy I’ll call you back.

Awful.

And genius x

it’s Thursday. I’m running out of jokes. "

this went over my head, but then i was on a cordless !

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By *ot to giggleWoman 13 weeks ago

Coventry

that was bad ...... very very bad!!!

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By *lowupdollTV/TS 13 weeks ago

S. Herts


"that was bad ...... very very bad!!! "

Oh I don’t know…OPs joke was quite good really.

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By *ot to giggleWoman 13 weeks ago

Coventry


"that was bad ...... very very bad!!!

Oh I don’t know…OPs joke was quite good really."

paper thin!

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By (user no longer on site) 13 weeks ago

I got a new job as a refuse collector, I'm here to take you all out.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman 13 weeks ago

Reading

Great news

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By *angerouslemaisonsMan 13 weeks ago

Peterborough

Next you’ll be telling me an end has a start

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 13 weeks ago

St Leonards


"Next you’ll be telling me an end has a start "

Good to see the OP starting a new chapter in his life though.

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By (user no longer on site) 13 weeks ago

Of course, I never judge a book by its cover; but it's for this reason I lost my job as Chair of the British Book Cover Awards panel.

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By *lowupdollTV/TS 13 weeks ago

S. Herts

I’m reading a 10’ book. Don’t ask why, it’s a long story.

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By *oeBeansMan 13 weeks ago

Derby

I think I'd prefer to be a Mirror Salesman. It's a career I really see myself in.

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 13 weeks ago

St Leonards

I read a lot of books on wit.

Well, they're half-read, anyway.

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By *illan-Killash OP   Man 13 weeks ago

London/Sussex/Surrey/Berks/Hants

My wife asked what a double' entende' was, so I gave her one.

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By *lowupdollTV/TS 13 weeks ago

S. Herts

I’m trying to get work in penis modelling. it’s really hard

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By *illan-Killash OP   Man 13 weeks ago

London/Sussex/Surrey/Berks/Hants

I got a job in a research study on masturbation.

Had to work a week in hand.

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By *rRiosMan 13 weeks ago

dublin

Well done OP, I recently got fired as an apiary inspector. I was beeing a proper buzz kill

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By *arlot o scaraWoman 13 weeks ago

Hell

My dad told everyone the titanic was going to sink, nobody listened. Undeterred, he carried on until they eventually chucked him out the cinema

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By *oeBeansMan 13 weeks ago

Derby


"I got a job in a research study on masturbation.

Had to work a week in hand."

Bet you made money hand over fist though!

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By *otTheMessiah86Man 13 weeks ago

Stockton


"To cut a long story short, I'm an Editor."

Congratulations! I love Editors. ‘Smokers Outside The Hospital Doors’ is my favourite. What morbidly depressing instrument do you play?

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By *avinaTVTV/TS 13 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania

These jokes are so weak, they're almost a fortnight...

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By *lowupdollTV/TS 13 weeks ago

S. Herts

Lance isn’t a common name these days, but in medieval times people were called lance a lot.

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 13 weeks ago

St Leonards


"Lance isn’t a common name these days, but in medieval times people were called lance a lot. "

.

OK - I snorted xxxx

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By *.T.Man 13 weeks ago

Belfast

I was recently sacked from the fraud protection team from the company I worked for as they claimed my detection rate was well down on what was expected.

I don't care as I'll be the one laughing when I'm driving by in my Bentley once the funds clear from the Nigerian Prince who has named me as a benefactor to his fathers fortune

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By *illan-Killash OP   Man 13 weeks ago

London/Sussex/Surrey/Berks/Hants

When I was young I hated facial hair.

But as I got older it grew on me.

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By *rRiosMan 13 weeks ago

dublin


"These jokes are so weak, they're almost a fortnight..."

Surly “these jokes are too weak…”

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By *.T.Man 13 weeks ago

Belfast


"These jokes are so weak, they're almost a fortnight...

Surly “these jokes are too weak…” "

Sex makes your day. Anal sex makes your hole weak

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By *ools and the brainCouple 13 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.

I ate too many yogurts the other day, I was mullered

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By *ools and the brainCouple 13 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.

I was told not to eat too many of those chick pea snacks they make you feelawful.

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By *rRiosMan 13 weeks ago

dublin


"These jokes are so weak, they're almost a fortnight...

Surly “these jokes are too weak…”

Sex makes your day. Anal sex makes your hole weak "

Triggered! “Whole week” *breathe*

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By *asilyled1Man 13 weeks ago

ogmore valley

Started a new job today. I’m an assistant doing circumcisions. The wages are crap but I get to keep the tips

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By *.T.Man 13 weeks ago

Belfast

I'm really looking forward to my new job as a carpenter. It's only just begun and already I feel on top of the world.

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By *onkoMan 13 weeks ago

here and there

What's the difference between a chickpea and a kidney bean

I've never had a kidney bean on my face

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