FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Have you ever had a reply to a first message?
Have you ever had a reply to a first message?
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) 24 weeks ago
|
It’s not easy for men on here I would say women will find it much easier but then again what do I know haha I wish I would have a inbox flooded with 500+ messages as I see women on here moaning about it  at least you get a ego boost haha |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP 24 weeks ago
|
"Unless for the purpose of a thread. I don't typically send the first message. I don't like to push myself onto people  "
Is sending a first message seen as pushing yourself onto people?
Fair enough |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *nnCeeWoman 24 weeks ago
East of Eden, West of Hell |
"Unless for the purpose of a thread. I don't typically send the first message. I don't like to push myself onto people "
What if you thought they be happy for you to push yourself into them? Sorry, I mean, erm, well...
As you were nothing to see here  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Unless for the purpose of a thread. I don't typically send the first message. I don't like to push myself onto people
Is sending a first message seen as pushing yourself onto people?
Fair enough"
Possibly not. But I don't wish to join the norm  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Unless for the purpose of a thread. I don't typically send the first message. I don't like to push myself onto people
What if you thought they be happy for you to push yourself into them? Sorry, I mean, erm, well...
As you were nothing to see here "
there is always that chance... and there's also the chance that others don't message first for whatever reason. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP 24 weeks ago
|
"Being totally honest.
My single account has never had a reply to my messages.
Our couples account gets replies but often from people unable to read out profile. "
Standard stuff 
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Unless for the purpose of a thread. I don't typically send the first message. I don't like to push myself onto people
Is sending a first message seen as pushing yourself onto people?
Fair enough"
If you don't send a message how are to show the other person you're interested? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP 24 weeks ago
|
"Unless for the purpose of a thread. I don't typically send the first message. I don't like to push myself onto people
Is sending a first message seen as pushing yourself onto people?
Fair enough
If you don't send a message how are to show the other person you're interested? "
I think some guys just do nothing and get lots of messages from women. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"It’s not easy for men on here I would say women will find it much easier but then again what do I know haha I wish I would have a inbox flooded with 500+ messages as I see women on here moaning about it at least you get a ego boost haha "
Not sure that’s entirely accurate, best go out and do a little more research there!  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Unless for the purpose of a thread. I don't typically send the first message. I don't like to push myself onto people
Is sending a first message seen as pushing yourself onto people?
Fair enough
If you don't send a message how are to show the other person you're interested? "
The ladies can and do send messages first.
What alot of blokes miss. Is that when they send a handful of first messages. They give up their opportunity to choose who they engage with.
When your receiving messages the swing of balance changes and you have the opportunity to choose who you respond to.
I don't batch fish.
I'm suggestive in the forums. I put a good representation of who I am on here.
I don't need to send begging messages. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP 24 weeks ago
|
"Unless for the purpose of a thread. I don't typically send the first message. I don't like to push myself onto people
Is sending a first message seen as pushing yourself onto people?
Fair enough
If you don't send a message how are to show the other person you're interested?
The ladies can and do send messages first.
What alot of blokes miss. Is that when they send a handful of first messages. They give up their opportunity to choose who they engage with.
When your receiving messages the swing of balance changes and you have the opportunity to choose who you respond to.
I don't batch fish.
I'm suggestive in the forums. I put a good representation of who I am on here.
I don't need to send begging messages."
They’re not begging messages? Unless you think women that send first messages are also begging?
Plus I think the forums are an entity of their own. Lots of guys get messages from the forums. Plenty of friendly ones. Some flirty ones. But the forums are people from all over. If you’re looking for someone local, the search function will always be better.
I don’t think it’s a bad thing that men decide to message local people first. It’s the point of the site. You can’t just sit around and wait for people near you to message you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Unless for the purpose of a thread. I don't typically send the first message. I don't like to push myself onto people
Is sending a first message seen as pushing yourself onto people?
Fair enough
If you don't send a message how are to show the other person you're interested?
The ladies can and do send messages first.
What alot of blokes miss. Is that when they send a handful of first messages. They give up their opportunity to choose who they engage with.
When your receiving messages the swing of balance changes and you have the opportunity to choose who you respond to.
I don't batch fish.
I'm suggestive in the forums. I put a good representation of who I am on here.
I don't need to send begging messages.
They’re not begging messages? Unless you think women that send first messages are also begging?
Plus I think the forums are an entity of their own. Lots of guys get messages from the forums. Plenty of friendly ones. Some flirty ones. But the forums are people from all over. If you’re looking for someone local, the search function will always be better.
I don’t think it’s a bad thing that men decide to message local people first. It’s the point of the site. You can’t just sit around and wait for people near you to message you. "
Im speaking from a male perspective. About the begging messages.
The messages I recieve aren't beggy. They're often from people I've had some flanter with on the forums.
Local? With the invention of planes trains and cars no distance is too short, if something where to happen.
The stereotypical male on here sends messages to all and sundry. Most profiles don't go into enough detail of one's character.
This is why I prefer the forums, you get a better sense of one's persona.
I'd rather "know" someone, rather than base it off a 500 word profile bio and a pretty picture. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP 24 weeks ago
|
"…
Plus I think the forums are an entity of their own. Lots of guys get messages from the forums. Plenty of friendly ones. Some flirty ones. But the forums are people from all over. If you’re looking for someone local, the search function will always be better.
I don’t think it’s a bad thing that men decide to message local people first. It’s the point of the site. You can’t just sit around and wait for people near you to message you.
Im speaking from a male perspective. About the begging messages.
The messages I recieve aren't beggy. They're often from people I've had some flanter with on the forums.
Local? With the invention of planes trains and cars no distance is too short, if something where to happen.
The stereotypical male on here sends messages to all and sundry. Most profiles don't go into enough detail of one's character.
This is why I prefer the forums, you get a better sense of one's persona.
I'd rather "know" someone, rather than base it off a 500 word profile bio and a pretty picture."
I do hear what you’re saying but I don’t think it’s fair to expect everyone to be willing to consider people hundreds of miles away as possibly their only suitors. I’ve met people hundreds of miles away and meet them often. But it’s ok to not want everyone to be that far. Wanting local people is ok and actually common on here.
I’m not disagreeing that the forums are a better way to get a sense of someone but finding people shouldn’t be something you have to use the forums for. And so many people will message profiles from searches. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 24 weeks ago
|
"It’s not easy for men on here I would say women will find it much easier but then again what do I know haha I wish I would have a inbox flooded with 500+ messages as I see women on here moaning about it at least you get a ego boost haha "
I am one of said women 'moaning' about 500 plus messages lol
It's not about the sheer volume, it's the attitude and behaviour of many men who ruin it for the nice ones. We can receive unpleasant messages from men being impatient, demanding, rude, even intimidating, get accused of being rude for not replying to them in two minutes straight, or for not being interested in them, a lot can't understand ladies get many msgs it gets overwhelming and we can't reply to all in a couple of mins nor keep up with all conversations xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"…
Plus I think the forums are an entity of their own. Lots of guys get messages from the forums. Plenty of friendly ones. Some flirty ones. But the forums are people from all over. If you’re looking for someone local, the search function will always be better.
I don’t think it’s a bad thing that men decide to message local people first. It’s the point of the site. You can’t just sit around and wait for people near you to message you.
Im speaking from a male perspective. About the begging messages.
The messages I recieve aren't beggy. They're often from people I've had some flanter with on the forums.
Local? With the invention of planes trains and cars no distance is too short, if something where to happen.
The stereotypical male on here sends messages to all and sundry. Most profiles don't go into enough detail of one's character.
This is why I prefer the forums, you get a better sense of one's persona.
I'd rather "know" someone, rather than base it off a 500 word profile bio and a pretty picture.
I do hear what you’re saying but I don’t think it’s fair to expect everyone to be willing to consider people hundreds of miles away as possibly their only suitors. I’ve met people hundreds of miles away and meet them often. But it’s ok to not want everyone to be that far. Wanting local people is ok and actually common on here.
I’m not disagreeing that the forums are a better way to get a sense of someone but finding people shouldn’t be something you have to use the forums for. And so many people will message profiles from searches. "
I think we've got our wires crossed Mr.P.
I don't typically look at the who's near me or use the search function.
I typically stick to the forums. I have had local people message me, and I do reply. I just don't send the first message |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
I think some guys just do nothing and get lots of messages from women.
Those bastards. Hate those guys
But did they do nothing to earn the right to sit back and let the messages flood in? "
Absolutely nothing.. All they do is eat well, work out and look better than me! The arrogance of them |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ee69Man 24 weeks ago
glasgow |
"It’s not easy for men on here I would say women will find it much easier but then again what do I know haha I wish I would have a inbox flooded with 500+ messages as I see women on here moaning about it at least you get a ego boost haha "
Totally lol |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"It’s not easy for men on here I would say women will find it much easier but then again what do I know haha I wish I would have a inbox flooded with 500+ messages as I see women on here moaning about it at least you get a ego boost haha
I am one of said women 'moaning' about 500 plus messages lol
It's not about the sheer volume, it's the attitude and behaviour of many men who ruin it for the nice ones. We can receive unpleasant messages from men being impatient, demanding, rude, even intimidating, get accused of being rude for not replying to them in two minutes straight, or for not being interested in them, a lot can't understand ladies get many msgs it gets overwhelming and we can't reply to all in a couple of mins nor keep up with all conversations xx"
And we have the story from the other side of the fence 
If you had 500+ messages from people you fancy physically and personality wise, yeah you would feel a pretty big confidence boost but out of that 500 how many are from guys who are worthwhile?
Keep it going it’s good to hear everyone’s perspective. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ee69Man 24 weeks ago
glasgow |
"It’s not easy for men on here I would say women will find it much easier but then again what do I know haha I wish I would have a inbox flooded with 500+ messages as I see women on here moaning about it at least you get a ego boost haha
I am one of said women 'moaning' about 500 plus messages lol
It's not about the sheer volume, it's the attitude and behaviour of many men who ruin it for the nice ones. We can receive unpleasant messages from men being impatient, demanding, rude, even intimidating, get accused of being rude for not replying to them in two minutes straight, or for not being interested in them, a lot can't understand ladies get many msgs it gets overwhelming and we can't reply to all in a couple of mins nor keep up with all conversations xx"
True it ruins it for us sort a normal guys lol
Apart from the odd one , most of my conversations just end up get lost in the a million messages most women get , it’s the way most of time unless your lucky and hold there interests long enough to get chat off here |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Did it go anywhere?"
Yes, all my meets through Fab have been from me sending the first message, then receiving a reply back.
I genuinely cannot recall having a meet from a solo female or couple contacting me in the first instance, after over 11 years in Fab |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *nnCeeWoman 24 weeks ago
East of Eden, West of Hell |
"It’s not easy for men on here I would say women will find it much easier but then again what do I know haha I wish I would have a inbox flooded with 500+ messages as I see women on here moaning about it at least you get a ego boost haha
I am one of said women 'moaning' about 500 plus messages lol
It's not about the sheer volume, it's the attitude and behaviour of many men who ruin it for the nice ones. We can receive unpleasant messages from men being impatient, demanding, rude, even intimidating, get accused of being rude for not replying to them in two minutes straight, or for not being interested in them, a lot can't understand ladies get many msgs it gets overwhelming and we can't reply to all in a couple of mins nor keep up with all conversations xx
True it ruins it for us sort a normal guys lol
Apart from the odd one , most of my conversations just end up get lost in the a million messages most women get , it’s the way most of time unless your lucky and hold there interests long enough to get chat off here "
I think that depends on what you've sent as a message... if I've received a handful of messages, I'll read all of them, and check out the profiles. If the profile and message are such that I can see someone has put thought into it and is not just sending "meet now" or similar messages, I'm more likely to engage.
But that's just me. I don't get hundreds of messages. It may be different for those ladies who do. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Only on the back of the forum thread.
What happened to the OP?
Overloaded with messages and his inbox blew up."
That bastard he completed fab.
Hope he's okay though. This place can feel overwhelming at times if it's not totally working in your favour |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Sure, but it's perhaps less than 1 in 10, I don't count, some people like to chat, to me that counts as going somewhere, if you can't enjoy the conversation and only regard getting into bed (other options are available) as 'going somewhere', then I wouldn't be surprised if it never 'goes somewhere' for you |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *nnCeeWoman 24 weeks ago
East of Eden, West of Hell |
"Nah, pickle has been here for a long time.
Somethings off.
I hope he's OK."
He sort of is, and sort of isn't.
I've got him though...
I told him he would be very much missed he's a very naughty Pickle... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Nah, pickle has been here for a long time.
Somethings off.
I hope he's OK.
He sort of is, and sort of isn't.
I've got him though...
I told him he would be very much missed he's a very naughty Pickle..."
Good to know. Send him our best |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Nah, pickle has been here for a long time.
Somethings off.
I hope he's OK.
He sort of is, and sort of isn't.
I've got him though...
I told him he would be very much missed he's a very naughty Pickle..."
Tell him we are here for him
I'm genuinely heartbroken |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Oh he gone!!
And way ^^^^ said about 500+ messages! The rudeness! It aint customer service line! Want a prompt reply try a utility service, and they can take 3 days
Hope OP has survived his imploding inbox!! Or maybe his ex found him |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ee69Man 24 weeks ago
glasgow |
"It’s not easy for men on here I would say women will find it much easier but then again what do I know haha I wish I would have a inbox flooded with 500+ messages as I see women on here moaning about it at least you get a ego boost haha
I am one of said women 'moaning' about 500 plus messages lol
It's not about the sheer volume, it's the attitude and behaviour of many men who ruin it for the nice ones. We can receive unpleasant messages from men being impatient, demanding, rude, even intimidating, get accused of being rude for not replying to them in two minutes straight, or for not being interested in them, a lot can't understand ladies get many msgs it gets overwhelming and we can't reply to all in a couple of mins nor keep up with all conversations xx
True it ruins it for us sort a normal guys lol
Apart from the odd one , most of my conversations just end up get lost in the a million messages most women get , it’s the way most of time unless your lucky and hold there interests long enough to get chat off here
I think that depends on what you've sent as a message... if I've received a handful of messages, I'll read all of them, and check out the profiles. If the profile and message are such that I can see someone has put thought into it and is not just sending "meet now" or similar messages, I'm more likely to engage.
But that's just me. I don't get hundreds of messages. It may be different for those ladies who do."
Well mine are a read the girls profile and see if we got shared interests , a try be fun an respectful am just messaging , shagg now lol , it just your luck , tho am no letter written or charmer lol |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"OP has gone UNLOS 
And he was doing so well on here!!
A little more patience and he would have got a meet I think.
Shame Pickle was being pro active and seemed a likeable guy!!"
Hope he comes back. He seemed like one of Fab’s good guys. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Did it go anywhere?"
Yes, to a meet about thirty minutes later. Still exchange the occasional message at 2 am when one or the other of us reach out, but sadly no get together in person for several years now. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"OP has gone UNLOS
And he was doing so well on here!!
A little more patience and he would have got a meet I think.
Shame Pickle was being pro active and seemed a likeable guy!!"
I'm meeting him on Saturday. There are people who are in touch with him. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"OP has gone UNLOS
And he was doing so well on here!!
A little more patience and he would have got a meet I think.
Shame Pickle was being pro active and seemed a likeable guy!!
I'm meeting him on Saturday. There are people who are in touch with him. "
We’ll send him my regards and hopefully he will come back soon when he’s ready.
Hopefully a good meet will help |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"OP has gone UNLOS
And he was doing so well on here!!
A little more patience and he would have got a meet I think.
Shame Pickle was being pro active and seemed a likeable guy!!
I'm meeting him on Saturday. There are people who are in touch with him.
We’ll send him my regards and hopefully he will come back soon when he’s ready.
Hopefully a good meet will help "
Hopefully he's meeting a fair few of us for at least part of the day |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"OP has gone UNLOS
And he was doing so well on here!!
A little more patience and he would have got a meet I think.
Shame Pickle was being pro active and seemed a likeable guy!!
I'm meeting him on Saturday. There are people who are in touch with him.
We’ll send him my regards and hopefully he will come back soon when he’s ready.
Hopefully a good meet will help
Hopefully he's meeting a fair few of us for at least part of the day "
He is  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Only on the back of the forum thread.
What happened to the OP? "
He's working his way through the tidal wave of messages from all 500 single women in Fab. Be careful what you wish for people....... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"OP has gone UNLOS
And he was doing so well on here!!
A little more patience and he would have got a meet I think.
Shame Pickle was being pro active and seemed a likeable guy!!
I'm meeting him on Saturday. There are people who are in touch with him.
We’ll send him my regards and hopefully he will come back soon when he’s ready.
Hopefully a good meet will help
Hopefully he's meeting a fair few of us for at least part of the day "
He is going to be a busy boy then |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Unless for the purpose of a thread. I don't typically send the first message. I don't like to push myself onto people
Is sending a first message seen as pushing yourself onto people?
Fair enough
If you don't send a message how are to show the other person you're interested?
The ladies can and do send messages first.
What alot of blokes miss. Is that when they send a handful of first messages. They give up their opportunity to choose who they engage with.
When your receiving messages the swing of balance changes and you have the opportunity to choose who you respond to.
I don't batch fish.
I'm suggestive in the forums. I put a good representation of who I am on here.
I don't need to send begging messages."
I certify this comment |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *nnCeeWoman 24 weeks ago
East of Eden, West of Hell |
"OP has gone UNLOS
And he was doing so well on here!!
A little more patience and he would have got a meet I think.
Shame Pickle was being pro active and seemed a likeable guy!!
I'm meeting him on Saturday. There are people who are in touch with him.
We’ll send him my regards and hopefully he will come back soon when he’s ready.
Hopefully a good meet will help
Hopefully he's meeting a fair few of us for at least part of the day
He is "
Oooohhhh... are you coming, LB?!
*excited* |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
