FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do guys still pinch bottoms in pubs if given a chance?
Do guys still pinch bottoms in pubs if given a chance?
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"Women are boring these days. Most don't seem to appreciate it anymore
Right? So uptight. Unnecessarily. Bring back the good old days when men would make it obvious they liked you. "
Absolutely Meli. I'd have pinched your bottom on a busy dancefloor  |
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"It recently happened to me and we then got chatting, he was a great guy, surely just comfortable with his masculinity, have we taken things too far ?
"
It's a bit predatorial if I man is doing it to a woman. |
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I'll be honest and speaking as a woman here (and someone who isn't "seen" when I'm out), I'd love it if a man actually pinched my bum, it's just a pinch, not a grope at my boobs but then I know I'm in a small minority of women here and consent is everything but still, someone other than my husband would be nice! |
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By *929Man 30 weeks ago
bedlington |
God no i never would I still recall 20 odd years ago a lad in our group did it to a lass standing next to me and quickly turned away so it looked like me I never felt so much of a twat in mt life had to make him admit what he did and the urge to batter the living daylights out of him was so hard to not do still to this day I wish I had sometimes |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
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"What's a pub please?
In London that’s what we call the sex clubs. Dunno about where you are though
And it's a legal requirement to pinch bottoms in them?
In "
Oh no! Not without consent! We’re not barbaric down here |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
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I think it’s important to respect people’s boundaries/not invade their personal space. Having said that the lack of viable avenues of interaction in a noisy nightclub probably has seen the decline of organic/natural approaches on a night out; the hand on the shoulder or a lean in to talk.
This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, it means nights out are less predatory and don’t violate someone’s privacy/space but it does mean that connections are missed/ require more effort/ positive action and reinforcement from the other party.
E.g I’d never inflict my presence on a woman on a night out/ approach/touch her, a shared smile, eyes interlocking and a fleeting flirt is all it’ll ever be unless she approaches me/ takes action. Although maybe that’s me being timid/shy or realistic about the chances a lass would be interested in me…
Maybe that explains why I’m still single at 33   |
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"Women are boring these days. Most don't seem to appreciate it anymore
Right? So uptight. Unnecessarily. Bring back the good old days when men would make it obvious they liked you. "
I am guessing you were very receptive to those guys who used to grind against you on the dance floor.
It always worked out so well for them, guaranteed shag everytime  |
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"What's a pub please?
In London that’s what we call the sex clubs. Dunno about where you are though
And it's a legal requirement to pinch bottoms in them?
In
Oh no! Not without consent! We’re not barbaric down here"
Ahhhhhh...Thank you Pickle. Got it. You go out to this "pub" thing. You don't pinch bums. Unless someone you've never met before comes up and declares, out of nowhere, "You have permission to pinch my bum!!! Would you like a peanut too?".
Is there somewhere for washing hands after? Some bums are a bit farty.
I like you humans - you're cute xxxx |
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By *nityCouple 30 weeks ago
stowmarket |
"I think it’s important to respect people’s boundaries/not invade their personal space. Having said that the lack of viable avenues of interaction in a noisy nightclub probably has seen the decline of organic/natural approaches on a night out; the hand on the shoulder or a lean in to talk.
This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, it means nights out are less predatory and don’t violate someone’s privacy/space but it does mean that connections are missed/ require more effort/ positive action and reinforcement from the other party.
E.g I’d never inflict my presence on a woman on a night out/ approach/touch her, a shared smile, eyes interlocking and a fleeting flirt is all it’ll ever be unless she approaches me/ takes action. Although maybe that’s me being timid/shy or realistic about the chances a lass would be interested in me…
Maybe that explains why I’m still single at 33 "
I’m still the quiet one in a social situation and I’m married, yes I’ve been lucky on the club scene in the past. I prefer now to chat with the wife and others to see where it leads…. Always happy to chat and help others out especially if they are just starting out and need a supporting couple…. |
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Some have no sense of proportion.
I was a glass collector at the 'grab a granny' night in the early nineties. Getting groped whilst collecting glasses filled with cigarette butts was standard.
I'd say 4-5 gropes on average per circuit as it got to toward the end of the night. £2.50 an hour and a face full of lippy hey who can complain! They were 'just having a laugh' with me. |
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"Some have no sense of proportion.
I was a glass collector at the 'grab a granny' night in the early nineties. Getting groped whilst collecting glasses filled with cigarette butts was standard.
I'd say 4-5 gropes on average per circuit as it got to toward the end of the night. £2.50 an hour and a face full of lippy hey who can complain! They were 'just having a laugh' with me."
Yeah but that's ok because 'men like that sort of thing'.  |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
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A few months back, at a museum, a random man out his hands around my waist as he walked around me to grab his daughter off a climbing frame. I was really perplexed. |
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Not pinched a bum since the 90s. Had my bum pinched a few times fairly recently. Actually flattered but understand it's acceptable for men to feel this and not reversed. Double standards I guess but like I said I wouldn't pinch. |
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"A few months back, at a museum, a random man out his hands around my waist as he walked around me to grab his daughter off a climbing frame. I was really perplexed. "
It may have been just to stop himself from bumping into you and was just concerned about his daughter |
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"A few months back, at a museum, a random man out his hands around my waist as he walked around me to grab his daughter off a climbing frame. I was really perplexed. "
Innocent as it may sound I still find this creepy I'm afraid. |
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"Are we saying men can’t be men anymore ?"
I'll be honest, I don't think anyone is stopping men being men anymore, if pinching a strangers bum is the route to a man feeling like a man, I think that man needs to seek some professional help |
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"A few months back, at a museum, a random man out his hands around my waist as he walked around me to grab his daughter off a climbing frame. I was really perplexed.
It may have been just to stop himself from bumping into you and was just concerned about his daughter"
That's when a person says "excuse me" |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
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"A few months back, at a museum, a random man out his hands around my waist as he walked around me to grab his daughter off a climbing frame. I was really perplexed.
Innocent as it may sound I still find this creepy I'm afraid."
It was extremely creepy. I was just shocked and horrified he out his hands on my waist as if we were very well acquainted. I felt my personal space was violated. |
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"A few months back, at a museum, a random man out his hands around my waist as he walked around me to grab his daughter off a climbing frame. I was really perplexed.
Innocent as it may sound I still find this creepy I'm afraid.
It was extremely creepy. I was just shocked and horrified he out his hands on my waist as if we were very well acquainted. I felt my personal space was violated. "
Yea. That sounds super icky. I guess these people learn this behaviour in their personal lives and just think it’s ok to lay their hands on anyone like that.. |
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"A few months back, at a museum, a random man out his hands around my waist as he walked around me to grab his daughter off a climbing frame. I was really perplexed.
Innocent as it may sound I still find this creepy I'm afraid.
It was extremely creepy. I was just shocked and horrified he out his hands on my waist as if we were very well acquainted. I felt my personal space was violated. "
I wonder if he would have done it to a man. |
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"A few months back, at a museum, a random man out his hands around my waist as he walked around me to grab his daughter off a climbing frame. I was really perplexed.
Innocent as it may sound I still find this creepy I'm afraid.
It was extremely creepy. I was just shocked and horrified he out his hands on my waist as if we were very well acquainted. I felt my personal space was violated.
Yea. That sounds super icky. I guess these people learn this behaviour in their personal lives and just think it’s ok to lay their hands on anyone like that.. "
*Some* men think it's acceptable to physically move women out if their way. |
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"A few months back, at a museum, a random man out his hands around my waist as he walked around me to grab his daughter off a climbing frame. I was really perplexed.
Innocent as it may sound I still find this creepy I'm afraid.
It was extremely creepy. I was just shocked and horrified he out his hands on my waist as if we were very well acquainted. I felt my personal space was violated. "
It was, like nicecouple said excuse me would have been the thing to say. |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
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"A few months back, at a museum, a random man out his hands around my waist as he walked around me to grab his daughter off a climbing frame. I was really perplexed.
Innocent as it may sound I still find this creepy I'm afraid.
It was extremely creepy. I was just shocked and horrified he out his hands on my waist as if we were very well acquainted. I felt my personal space was violated.
It was, like nicecouple said excuse me would have been the thing to say."
He was kind enough to say, sorry just helping my daughter off the climbing frame. The thing was I was meters away from the climbing frame and in no way in his way. |
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"A few months back, at a museum, a random man out his hands around my waist as he walked around me to grab his daughter off a climbing frame. I was really perplexed.
Innocent as it may sound I still find this creepy I'm afraid.
It was extremely creepy. I was just shocked and horrified he out his hands on my waist as if we were very well acquainted. I felt my personal space was violated.
It was, like nicecouple said excuse me would have been the thing to say.
He was kind enough to say, sorry just helping my daughter off the climbing frame. The thing was I was meters away from the climbing frame and in no way in his way. "
Just an excuse for his predatory behaviour. |
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"A few months back, at a museum, a random man out his hands around my waist as he walked around me to grab his daughter off a climbing frame. I was really perplexed.
Innocent as it may sound I still find this creepy I'm afraid.
It was extremely creepy. I was just shocked and horrified he out his hands on my waist as if we were very well acquainted. I felt my personal space was violated.
It was, like nicecouple said excuse me would have been the thing to say.
He was kind enough to say, sorry just helping my daughter off the climbing frame. The thing was I was meters away from the climbing frame and in no way in his way. "
He wasn't being kind. He was employing the age old strategy of doing something wrong them putting you in the position of having to accept his bad behaviour because he apologised.
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To add to Bella's experience, I find men are particularly prone to thinking they can move my wheelchair and touch it without asking. It happens far more often with men than women. When you shout and tell them to stop/get off, you're treated like you're making a fuss over nothing.
The wheelchair is my legs. Touch my legs and you get my wrath. |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
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"A few months back, at a museum, a random man out his hands around my waist as he walked around me to grab his daughter off a climbing frame. I was really perplexed.
Innocent as it may sound I still find this creepy I'm afraid.
It was extremely creepy. I was just shocked and horrified he out his hands on my waist as if we were very well acquainted. I felt my personal space was violated.
It was, like nicecouple said excuse me would have been the thing to say.
He was kind enough to say, sorry just helping my daughter off the climbing frame. The thing was I was meters away from the climbing frame and in no way in his way.
He wasn't being kind. He was employing the age old strategy of doing something wrong them putting you in the position of having to accept his bad behaviour because he apologised.
"
I’m aware. My tone was sarcastic in calling him
kind. x |
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"I think it’s important to respect people’s boundaries/not invade their personal space. Having said that the lack of viable avenues of interaction in a noisy nightclub probably has seen the decline of organic/natural approaches on a night out; the hand on the shoulder or a lean in to talk.
This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, it means nights out are less predatory and don’t violate someone’s privacy/space but it does mean that connections are missed/ require more effort/ positive action and reinforcement from the other party.
E.g I’d never inflict my presence on a woman on a night out/ approach/touch her, a shared smile, eyes interlocking and a fleeting flirt is all it’ll ever be unless she approaches me/ takes action. Although maybe that’s me being timid/shy or realistic about the chances a lass would be interested in me…
Maybe that explains why I’m still single at 33 "
A faint heart never shagged a fair maiden….. |
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"To add to Bella's experience, I find men are particularly prone to thinking they can move my wheelchair and touch it without asking. It happens far more often with men than women. When you shout and tell them to stop/get off, you're treated like you're making a fuss over nothing.
The wheelchair is my legs. Touch my legs and you get my wrath. "
How the fuck do they think that’s ok?
I’d definitely find that really demeaning.
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"A few months back, at a museum, a random man out his hands around my waist as he walked around me to grab his daughter off a climbing frame. I was really perplexed.
Innocent as it may sound I still find this creepy I'm afraid.
It was extremely creepy. I was just shocked and horrified he out his hands on my waist as if we were very well acquainted. I felt my personal space was violated.
It was, like nicecouple said excuse me would have been the thing to say.
He was kind enough to say, sorry just helping my daughter off the climbing frame. The thing was I was meters away from the climbing frame and in no way in his way.
He wasn't being kind. He was employing the age old strategy of doing something wrong them putting you in the position of having to accept his bad behaviour because he apologised.
I’m aware. My tone was sarcastic in calling him
kind. x"
Oh, sorry. |
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I've never done it and can only ever remember one of my friends doing it but it was someone he knew who did it to him on a regular basis.
I've had women do it to me though when I've been going about my job in hotels, clubs and pubs and some were cheered on by their friends.
In one pub the landlord asked them how they would feel if the roles were reversed and told them to stop doing it.
They took the hump and left saying it was a shit pub anyway.
I've been grabbed and groped by a large group of women on a stag outing once again while I was only in the premises doing my job.
Their excuse was that they thought I was the stripper but the landlady had to wade into the middle of them shouting loudly to back the fuck off.
I had told them to back off but they thought it was a great big joke.
Like a lot of behavioural issues whether in pubs or not, it's not restricted to men.
My daughters have all worked in hospitality and never had an issue with customers but one hotel they worked in lost 3 male staff due to constant harassment by female guests. |
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Mmm no because that is sexual assault.
Not really that hard to understand is it?
This also applies to swinging clubs too (as some folk seem to think it’s ok in a club as everyone is there for the same thing, right?)
 |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
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"Mmm no because that is sexual assault.
Not really that hard to understand is it?
This also applies to swinging clubs too (as some folk seem to think it’s ok in a club as everyone is there for the same thing, right?)
"
In clubs, I find it is the women more than men that randomly go around grabbing people. Or at least me. The number of times women randomly have grabbed a tit or my bum walking up or down stairs in clubs… |
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"To add to Bella's experience, I find men are particularly prone to thinking they can move my wheelchair and touch it without asking. It happens far more often with men than women. When you shout and tell them to stop/get off, you're treated like you're making a fuss over nothing.
The wheelchair is my legs. Touch my legs and you get my wrath.
How the fuck do they think that’s ok?
I’d definitely find that really demeaning.
"
I really don't know. It's very annoying. |
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"Mmm no because that is sexual assault.
Not really that hard to understand is it?
This also applies to swinging clubs too (as some folk seem to think it’s ok in a club as everyone is there for the same thing, right?)
In clubs, I find it is the women more than men that randomly go around grabbing people. Or at least me. The number of times women randomly have grabbed a tit or my bum walking up or down stairs in clubs…"
Same rules apply, I’d suggest you report it to staff next time it happens. |
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"Some have no sense of proportion.
I was a glass collector at the 'grab a granny' night in the early nineties. Getting groped whilst collecting glasses filled with cigarette butts was standard.
I'd say 4-5 gropes on average per circuit as it got to toward the end of the night. £2.50 an hour and a face full of lippy hey who can complain! They were 'just having a laugh' with me.
Yeah but that's ok because 'men like that sort of thing'. "
Or even 15 year old boys. Dancing queen still gives me the shivers. 
Yeah I don't need convincing that it's inappropriate.
Some changes are for the better. |
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"Mmm no because that is sexual assault.
Not really that hard to understand is it?
This also applies to swinging clubs too (as some folk seem to think it’s ok in a club as everyone is there for the same thing, right?)
"
It should apply in clubs but I've definitely had guys think it doesn't. A hand on my leg, on my back, a foot against my leg in the hot tub, trying to touch my hand,touching my hair. They were all men, I've never actually had a woman in a club touch me without consent. |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
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"Mmm no because that is sexual assault.
Not really that hard to understand is it?
This also applies to swinging clubs too (as some folk seem to think it’s ok in a club as everyone is there for the same thing, right?)
It should apply in clubs but I've definitely had guys think it doesn't. A hand on my leg, on my back, a foot against my leg in the hot tub, trying to touch my hand,touching my hair. They were all men, I've never actually had a woman in a club touch me without consent. "
Most of my encounters of people touching me inappropriately without consent are with men too. |
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There are times when a good old-fashioned goose is okay. (I didn’t realise until recently that not everybody calls bum-pinching ‘goosing’. Maybe I’m old-fashioned, or maybe it was a Yorkshire thing?)
It’s okay when you’re good friends. Or when consent is otherwise implied.
I’ll always remember being goosed on the way up some stairs in a nightclub and turning round to see a girl I *really* fancied grinning and giggling at me. We snogged at the top of those stairs and it was a delight. |
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"There are times when a good old-fashioned goose is okay. (I didn’t realise until recently that not everybody calls bum-pinching ‘goosing’. Maybe I’m old-fashioned, or maybe it was a Yorkshire thing?)
It’s okay when you’re good friends. Or when consent is otherwise implied.
I’ll always remember being goosed on the way up some stairs in a nightclub and turning round to see a girl I *really* fancied grinning and giggling at me. We snogged at the top of those stairs and it was a delight."
Did you goose her means something a tad different 'round are way'. |
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"There are times when a good old-fashioned goose is okay. (I didn’t realise until recently that not everybody calls bum-pinching ‘goosing’. Maybe I’m old-fashioned, or maybe it was a Yorkshire thing?)
It’s okay when you’re good friends. Or when consent is otherwise implied.
I’ll always remember being goosed on the way up some stairs in a nightclub and turning round to see a girl I *really* fancied grinning and giggling at me. We snogged at the top of those stairs and it was a delight."
‘Goosing’ down here, was more an approach from behind and putting hands either side of waist and giving a little squeeze. I imagine the terms fall in use has corresponded with the decline in the practice. |
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"Pinch is rare. Grabbing a handful as you walk past in a busy bar happens all the time. Rubbing elbows against tits seems a weird new thing too.
'tit elbow' dates back to the 80s."
Oh yes definitely, back in the 80’s I remember the elbow/ nipple interface in the crowded pub.
When I say remember, obviously I mean remember being told about such things, I would never have done that, ya know, just for clarity, like. |
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"Pinch is rare. Grabbing a handful as you walk past in a busy bar happens all the time. Rubbing elbows against tits seems a weird new thing too.
'tit elbow' dates back to the 80s."
Yes, I experienced it in nightclubs when I was able bodied. You'd give a good elbow jab back for good measure  |
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"Pinch is rare. Grabbing a handful as you walk past in a busy bar happens all the time. Rubbing elbows against tits seems a weird new thing too. "
You need VAR to determine if it was elbow to tit or tit to elbow though. Not all venues have VAR installed. |
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"Pinch is rare. Grabbing a handful as you walk past in a busy bar happens all the time. Rubbing elbows against tits seems a weird new thing too.
You need VAR to determine if it was elbow to tit or tit to elbow though. Not all venues have VAR installed. "
Sans VAR, you must rely on the decision of the assistant referee/linesperson. |
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"Pinch is rare. Grabbing a handful as you walk past in a busy bar happens all the time. Rubbing elbows against tits seems a weird new thing too.
You need VAR to determine if it was elbow to tit or tit to elbow though. Not all venues have VAR installed.
Sans VAR, you must rely on the decision of the assistant referee/linesperson. "
Correction. Grabbing arses is a man’s sport so therefore it’s LINESMAN |
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"Pinch is rare. Grabbing a handful as you walk past in a busy bar happens all the time. Rubbing elbows against tits seems a weird new thing too.
You need VAR to determine if it was elbow to tit or tit to elbow though. Not all venues have VAR installed.
Sans VAR, you must rely on the decision of the assistant referee/linesperson.
Correction. Grabbing arses is a man’s sport so therefore it’s LINESMAN "
Negative, captain. Assistant refs can be any gender in the 21st century |
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"Pinch is rare. Grabbing a handful as you walk past in a busy bar happens all the time. Rubbing elbows against tits seems a weird new thing too.
You need VAR to determine if it was elbow to tit or tit to elbow though. Not all venues have VAR installed.
Sans VAR, you must rely on the decision of the assistant referee/linesperson.
Correction. Grabbing arses is a man’s sport so therefore it’s LINESMAN
Negative, captain. Assistant refs can be any gender in the 21st century "
Not in this pub |
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"Pinch is rare. Grabbing a handful as you walk past in a busy bar happens all the time. Rubbing elbows against tits seems a weird new thing too.
You need VAR to determine if it was elbow to tit or tit to elbow though. Not all venues have VAR installed.
Sans VAR, you must rely on the decision of the assistant referee/linesperson.
Correction. Grabbing arses is a man’s sport so therefore it’s LINESMAN
Negative, captain. Assistant refs can be any gender in the 21st century
Not in this pub "
*Can you see yourself running this pub? Call Wetherspoons on [redacted] to find out more* |
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By *irthandgirthMan 30 weeks ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
"Only if I can boot them in the balls in return. Keep your hands to yourself."
An unwanted physical contact being returned to owner.
A classic example of a behaviour illiciting an elevated reaction.
Same as if I walked up to a guy in a pub and spat in his pint.. I can expect a negative reaction. |
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