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Poems for an opener
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By (user no longer on site) OP 30 weeks ago
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Hi everyone
So I've been on here a few months now and don't seem to be getting much positive feedback from females!
I hate the "Hi, how are you" rubbish, so I always try to make the effort with a silly and innuendo type poem
It doesn't work!
Where/how do people get seen? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 30 weeks ago
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I once chatted to a girl on another dating app called "...buttons"
"...'s got buttons
They ought to be pressed
But where are those buttons
There's 2 on her chest"
That type of stuff!
No reply! |
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"I once chatted to a girl on another dating app called "...buttons"
"...'s got buttons
They ought to be pressed
But where are those buttons
There's 2 on her chest"
That type of stuff!
No reply! "
I’m shocked 
How could one not reply to that corker.
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
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"I once chatted to a girl on another dating app called "...buttons"
"...'s got buttons
They ought to be pressed
But where are those buttons
There's 2 on her chest"
That type of stuff!
No reply! "
I think maybe be a bit more descriptive in the future?
Idk something like…..there once was a dadbodthegreat
He thought sending poems would find him a mate
But when he got no reply, he didn’t know why so had a jolly old wank into his eye |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
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"I once chatted to a girl on another dating app called "...buttons"
"...'s got buttons
They ought to be pressed
But where are those buttons
There's 2 on her chest"
That type of stuff!
No reply!
I’m shocked
How could one not reply to that corker.
"
Misty is aroused when the poem was given in open forum, imagine the effect if that erotica arrived in her inbox.  |
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"Hi everyone
So I've been on here a few months now and don't seem to be getting much positive feedback from females!
I hate the "Hi, how are you" rubbish, so I always try to make the effort with a silly and innuendo type poem
It doesn't work!
Where/how do people get seen?"
Have you considered starting by asking them a question about something they've written on their profile? |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
|
"Hi everyone
So I've been on here a few months now and don't seem to be getting much positive feedback from females!
I hate the "Hi, how are you" rubbish, so I always try to make the effort with a silly and innuendo type poem
It doesn't work!
Where/how do people get seen?
Have you considered starting by asking them a question about something they've written on their profile?"
No!!!!
More serenading sonnets!!! |
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"I once chatted to a girl on another dating app called "...buttons"
"...'s got buttons
They ought to be pressed
But where are those buttons
There's 2 on her chest"
That type of stuff!
No reply!
I’m shocked
How could one not reply to that corker.
Misty is aroused when the poem was given in open forum, imagine the effect if that erotica arrived in her inbox. "
My buttons are tingling
My skin’s getting hot
I feel the flame of desire
Oh. No it’s not.
I’m stood too close to the grill. |
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"I once chatted to a girl on another dating app called "...buttons"
"...'s got buttons
They ought to be pressed
But where are those buttons
There's 2 on her chest"
That type of stuff!
No reply!
I’m shocked
How could one not reply to that corker.
Misty is aroused when the poem was given in open forum, imagine the effect if that erotica arrived in her inbox.
My buttons are tingling
My skin’s getting hot
I feel the flame of desire
Oh. No it’s not.
I’m stood too close to the grill."
Your buttons are shiny
So if you wouldn't mind
Taking your blouse off
Because they're making me blind. |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
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I hope you now see the error in your ways op?
Take the pointers from all these lovely people, go forth and prosper!
Thou will be balls deep in clunge in no time |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 30 weeks ago
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"I hope you now see the error in your ways op?
Take the pointers from all these lovely people, go forth and prosper!
Thou will be balls deep in clunge in no time"
Duly noted
Thanks for your, er, "help", everyone! |
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The op is getting nowhere, his poems falling flat,
When all hes trying to achieve, is starting up a chat,
So, come on you single ladies, or couples, heres your prize.
The op just wants to get a meet, so come and feast your eyes.
Hes posted several pictures with his dad bod there on show.
Hes said he’ll have a social for a chance with you to know
He ideally wants to fuck you, or to share you with your man
So your jobs now been made easy, just consent and say he can.
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By (user no longer on site) OP 30 weeks ago
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"The op is getting nowhere, his poems falling flat,
When all hes trying to achieve, is starting up a chat,
So, come on you single ladies, or couples, heres your prize.
The op just wants to get a meet, so come and feast your eyes.
Hes posted several pictures with his dad bod there on show.
Hes said he’ll have a social for a chance with you to know
He ideally wants to fuck you, or to share you with your man
So your jobs now been made easy, just consent and say he can.
"
Ding ding ding
Winner
Close the post. Nothing can beat this one. No point trying anymore. |
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"The op is getting nowhere, his poems falling flat,
When all hes trying to achieve, is starting up a chat,
So, come on you single ladies, or couples, heres your prize.
The op just wants to get a meet, so come and feast your eyes.
Hes posted several pictures with his dad bod there on show.
Hes said he’ll have a social for a chance with you to know
He ideally wants to fuck you, or to share you with your man
So your jobs now been made easy, just consent and say he can.
"
Pmsl I'd say you a good craic |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
|
"The op is getting nowhere, his poems falling flat,
When all hes trying to achieve, is starting up a chat,
So, come on you single ladies, or couples, heres your prize.
The op just wants to get a meet, so come and feast your eyes.
Hes posted several pictures with his dad bod there on show.
Hes said he’ll have a social for a chance with you to know
He ideally wants to fuck you, or to share you with your man
So your jobs now been made easy, just consent and say he can.
Ding ding ding
Winner
Close the post. Nothing can beat this one. No point trying anymore. "
Send her one back then  |
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"The op is getting nowhere, his poems falling flat,
When all hes trying to achieve, is starting up a chat,
So, come on you single ladies, or couples, heres your prize.
The op just wants to get a meet, so come and feast your eyes.
Hes posted several pictures with his dad bod there on show.
Hes said he’ll have a social for a chance with you to know
He ideally wants to fuck you, or to share you with your man
So your jobs now been made easy, just consent and say he can.
Ding ding ding
Winner
Close the post. Nothing can beat this one. No point trying anymore.
Send her one back then "
Ah alas he is outside my requirements. |
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"The op is getting nowhere, his poems falling flat,
When all hes trying to achieve, is starting up a chat,
So, come on you single ladies, or couples, heres your prize.
The op just wants to get a meet, so come and feast your eyes.
Hes posted several pictures with his dad bod there on show.
Hes said he’ll have a social for a chance with you to know
He ideally wants to fuck you, or to share you with your man
So your jobs now been made easy, just consent and say he can.
"
I go to the Isle of White,
When the festival gigs are on.
Now I've read you poem
I wish they were all year long.
For the chance to see you would increase,
And I think we would get on.
But more that that I love your style
And want you all night long. |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
|
"The op is getting nowhere, his poems falling flat,
When all hes trying to achieve, is starting up a chat,
So, come on you single ladies, or couples, heres your prize.
The op just wants to get a meet, so come and feast your eyes.
Hes posted several pictures with his dad bod there on show.
Hes said he’ll have a social for a chance with you to know
He ideally wants to fuck you, or to share you with your man
So your jobs now been made easy, just consent and say he can.
Ding ding ding
Winner
Close the post. Nothing can beat this one. No point trying anymore.
Send her one back then
Ah alas he is outside my requirements. "
Ah, ok well, just send penis instead then bro  |
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"The op is getting nowhere, his poems falling flat,
When all hes trying to achieve, is starting up a chat,
So, come on you single ladies, or couples, heres your prize.
The op just wants to get a meet, so come and feast your eyes.
Hes posted several pictures with his dad bod there on show.
Hes said he’ll have a social for a chance with you to know
He ideally wants to fuck you, or to share you with your man
So your jobs now been made easy, just consent and say he can.
I go to the Isle of White,
When the festival gigs are on.
Now I've read you poem
I wish they were all year long.
For the chance to see you would increase,
And I think we would get on.
But more that that I love your style
And want you all night long. "
Ha ha. |
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