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Celebs wot we have fucked*, reviewed and rated ..
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By (user no longer on site) OP 25 weeks ago
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(*in our dreams, like ..
Who: Madonna
Review : Like a virgin, touched for the very first time. Bit of a material girl until I got into her groove
Rating : 3 / 10
Who: Julia Roberts
Review : Fucked this Pretty Woman in Notting Hill. She was wearing Pelican briefs which made me Flatline
Rating : (Oceans)11 / 10
etc etc …
Who else, Fabsters?
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I fucked Angela Rayner and soon I think we’ll all be fucked.
A little political satire there that in no way represents my political leanings.
In reality I would love to. Northern girls need loving too.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 25 weeks ago
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Who : Demi Moore
Review : I’d heard she’d had a Good Few Men, so I gave her an Indecent Proposal for a Striptease.
After the deed was done, the next day I had some Mortal Thoughts About Last Night … but she Ghost-ed me 
Rating : Flawless |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 25 weeks ago
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Who : Britney Spears
Review : This chick is Crazy! Let me up the Toxic tunnel .. she was born to make me happy.
Round 2? Oops, I did it again.
Rating : Baby, one more time..
No? I give in .. |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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When I was younger I crushed hard on Melinda Messenger and Marilyn Monroe.
Re the men: I’ve always had super horn over Robert Downey Jnr!!!!!!!! Still do
Mrs x |
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Who: Nicole Kidman
Review: With a body To Die For, I was convinced that I was in for Days of Thunder but this was Far and Away my worst sexual experience: Despite The Hours that I put in to pleasuring her, she kept her Eyes Wide Shut the whole time!
Verdict: 2/10 Ice Queen |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 25 weeks ago
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"Who: Nicole Kidman
Review: With a body To Die For, I was convinced that I was in for Days of Thunder but this was Far and Away my worst sexual experience: Despite The Hours that I put in to pleasuring her, she kept her Eyes Wide Shut the whole time!
Verdict: 2/10 Ice Queen"
Finally!  good work!! |
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Who: Marion Cotillard and I made love from early evening, through the night, the following morning, and only stopped when we needed food around lunchtime.
Review: Supernovae are like dull bedroom lamps compared to....ahhhhhhhh...my Marion  .
Rating: Infinity. Lots of infinities. And then beyond lots of infinities.
Who: Liz Truss
Review: Pork markets were the high point of her career.
Rating: Minus 10 for every pound she mangled in the economy. |
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"Who: Nicole Kidman
Review: With a body To Die For, I was convinced that I was in for Days of Thunder but this was Far and Away my worst sexual experience: Despite The Hours that I put in to pleasuring her, she kept her Eyes Wide Shut the whole time!
Verdict: 2/10 Ice Queen
Finally! good work!! "
I did have to look up her filmography to maximise the comedic effect |
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