FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Neeeeeeeeeed me!!!!!!
Neeeeeeeeeed me!!!!!!
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By (user no longer on site) OP 25 weeks ago
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Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?
Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc.
Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?
Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it aswell as arranging to meet you?
Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others.
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By *ornycougaWoman 25 weeks ago
NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat |
I'm needy. I need to feel desired. If I get a whiff of complacency then they are dead to me.
I don't expect a guy to focus his attention on me 100pc - my assumption is that he is chatting to other women and arranging other meets - but I need to feel that he is into me, not just my orifices |
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"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?
Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc.
Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?
Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it aswell as arranging to meet you?
Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others.
"
No I don’t need that. Just simple cool to meet and contact on day / day before.
Don’t need my cock stroking with back n forth messaging |
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"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?
Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc.
Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?
Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it aswell as arranging to meet you?
Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others.
"
No
No but it's sometimes nice
No
No as long as they turn up when they agree to.
No
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Oh, absolutely not.
Want me for sure. Make an active choice and be enthusiastic to see me. Have that happy tease and build up before coming over.
Need? Hard no. Go find something else to depend on. I ain't interested in being the primary focus outside of the time we're physically together  |
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I don't need all the attention on a meet but I prefer it if they're not looking around for someone better all the time of browsing fab at the same time.
I don't want them messaging me saying they can't wait but I do like them to keep in touch.
I don't want constant affirmation
I don't care if they're arranging other meets. I just don't want to know about it
I'm indifferent to the fact they're fucking others.
I like things to be on an equal footing. I feel uncomfortable when people are very eager, I think it's a recipe for disappointment (for them) |
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I don’t give a toss about who they’re seeing what they’re doing or if they’re constantly affirming their desire.
I do however, expect the common courtesy of keeping in touch reasonably regularly, so I don’t feel like a human fleshlight x |
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"Oh, absolutely not.
Want me for sure. Make an active choice and be enthusiastic to see me. Have that happy tease and build up before coming over.
Need? Hard no. Go find something else to depend on. I ain't interested in being the primary focus outside of the time we're physically together "
In terms of fab, this is definitely how I feel.
I don’t need to be in constant contact, just a level of interaction and interest.
I don’t care if they’re meeting others, that’s cool and not an issue, so long as I know they’re interested and excited about me too. |
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"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?
Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc.
Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?
Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it aswell as arranging to meet you?
Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others.
"
I need constant attention and there should be no one else in the World they want to meet but meee full stop  |
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By *mmaleiaWoman 25 weeks ago
East Northamptonshire |
It’s nice to hear the guy say he finds you hot, but not all the time, just when I’m with him, it also doesn’t bother me if he’s seeing others, we have no exclusivity between us, although if it interfere with our meets, I’d stop the meets permanently & move on.
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"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?
Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc.
Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?
Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it aswell as arranging to meet you?
Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others.
"
Yes I want to know I've got their attention...
But No I don't need the constant affirmation/messaging, that just feels a bit much and a bit intense, dare I say clingy.
I don't care what they get up to the rest of the time, I'd rather not know. But at the same time I wouldn't want them coming to me after they'd had another meet the day before for instance... I like to save myself for people so I'm giving it my all, I would hope they'd do the same. Obviously I've got absolutely no control over any of that! |
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"Oh, absolutely not.
Want me for sure. Make an active choice and be enthusiastic to see me. Have that happy tease and build up before coming over.
Need? Hard no. Go find something else to depend on. I ain't interested in being the primary focus outside of the time we're physically together
In terms of fab, this is definitely how I feel.
I don’t need to be in constant contact, just a level of interaction and interest.
I don’t care if they’re meeting others, that’s cool and not an issue, so long as I know they’re interested and excited about me too. "
Is it very different outside of fab? |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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I’m poly. So no I don’t care who else they are fucking or dating or romancing. As long as they prioritise making time to spend together as I do.
In terms of neediness, depends on the relationship. If it’s just casual sex then they can hit me up for a chat or banter or a booty call I don’t really care. If it’s something more, like a possible partner, then I would expect quality communication even if not so often.
Sometimes I’m chatty (currently I’m chatty). Sometimes I’m not and I don’t reply to messages or don’t message people. That’s life. |
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By *929Man 25 weeks ago
newcastle |
Can’t really speak on meets but in everything I generally like to be left alone till its time to do whatever you have arranged never will be one to be in constant contact with someone ever |
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"Oh, absolutely not.
Want me for sure. Make an active choice and be enthusiastic to see me. Have that happy tease and build up before coming over.
Need? Hard no. Go find something else to depend on. I ain't interested in being the primary focus outside of the time we're physically together
In terms of fab, this is definitely how I feel.
I don’t need to be in constant contact, just a level of interaction and interest.
I don’t care if they’re meeting others, that’s cool and not an issue, so long as I know they’re interested and excited about me too.
Is it very different outside of fab?"
If I’m in a romantic relationship with someone, the situation is different |
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Morning Op
Do I want attention yes but tastefully.
No doubt they been fucking others before me I mean guys here have no trouble
Bit like supermarket when you scan at the AI till occasionally need assistance check I am doing it right am I old enough
Does one really care for notches ..nope. Enjoy a meet or not.
Attention please but in the bedroom or any room tastefully |
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I don't want or need all the attention. I assume that most people on here will be meeting/planning to meet others.
However, I do want to feel that they have some genuine interest and not that I'm plan B or C after plan A has fallen through. Constant messages, compliments and affirmations of their desire would feel insincere and cloying, but a light-hearted chat every few days because they enjoy talking to me is necessary for me not to feel like a human wank sock.
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By (user no longer on site) OP 25 weeks ago
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"I'm needy. I need to feel desired. If I get a whiff of complacency then they are dead to me.
I don't expect a guy to focus his attention on me 100pc - my assumption is that he is chatting to other women and arranging other meets - but I need to feel that he is into me, not just my orifices"
To feel wanted is pretty normal I'd say, I'd hope a guy wants me for more than my orifices as the orifices aren't that great.
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"I'm needy. I need to feel desired. If I get a whiff of complacency then they are dead to me.
I don't expect a guy to focus his attention on me 100pc - my assumption is that he is chatting to other women and arranging other meets - but I need to feel that he is into me, not just my orifices
To feel wanted is pretty normal I'd say, I'd hope a guy wants me for more than my orifices as the orifices aren't that great.
"
From what I see of you on here Im guessing you’re great company in or out of the bedroom  |
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"Oh, absolutely not.
Want me for sure. Make an active choice and be enthusiastic to see me. Have that happy tease and build up before coming over.
Need? Hard no. Go find something else to depend on. I ain't interested in being the primary focus outside of the time we're physically together
In terms of fab, this is definitely how I feel.
I don’t need to be in constant contact, just a level of interaction and interest.
I don’t care if they’re meeting others, that’s cool and not an issue, so long as I know they’re interested and excited about me too.
Is it very different outside of fab?
If I’m in a romantic relationship with someone, the situation is different "
Fair enough. I'm much the same with all of it |
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I don't arrange new 1:1 meets currently, only meet in clubs, by chance. When I was meeting, I was actually getting fed up by all the "can't wait to meet" and wanting to constantly chat about the meet, what's going to happen there etc. On rare occasions, I actually cancelled the meet and blocked the person if they got too much. Also, the same fate would have happened to anyone complaining I met someone else during the time between arranging the meet and actually meeting. But I was always very clear in my communication, making sure they were aware I was not going to be exclusive to them. I'm sure I have been blocked for not being able to meet straight away |
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It’s finding the balance without being seen to be needy and not caring… I guess if you go with the flow and people naturally bounce off each other - you know you have something special going on.
I did see someone who if she wrote and saw you had read the message but didn’t reply within 15 mins - it was a threat of a dump…. Not cool that |
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We don’t mind our play partners to be chatting or arranging meets as long as it doesn’t stop them from keeping in touch and building the fire for our next meet is.
Some people can do it and some people can’t…the ones who can’t clearly just see us as a number and go straight in the bin…
K |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?"
No - but remind me what is a meet?
"Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc."
No, certainly not - though it would be nice to have at least one message make my inbox go yellow (not a euphemism, so behave)
"Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?"
No - who are they again?
"Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it as well as arranging to meet you?"
No - I actually liked knowing that previous lovers were meeting others (and with one she used to provide me with details of the meet for her own safety - with confirmation that she had returned home OK).
"Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others. "
Ah, ha, see the answer to the question above. They were not exclusive, I might practice serial monogamy, but they liked variety as the spice of life.
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No, I haven't got the time to interact with someone that's giving me all their attention.
Now and again is good to hear, but it a nice bonus rather than a want.
No, thier actions and the conversation would show where this stand on this.
No, depends in the connection depends on how much I like to hear about it though, and cancelling out meet to meet someone else would be a instant end to things. Have never really got off knowing someone is fucking someone else. |
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Hence why Fab exists …
In some instances there been great excitement in the lead up - and sexting has/ can be very horny - and I hope in some instances I have stayed in touch …
( I didn’t leave with the family sliver in my pockets for example )
But it’s for pleasure and being in the moment to give your all, in making the best pleasure possible.
That’s why some members have FWB.
It’s not a dating site it’s more than that in my view
Respect while your together 100% |
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"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?"
I want you to want me. I don’t need you to need me.
By which I mean that desire is sexy. Neediness isn’t. I want some attention. I want a little. I want you to think of me. But definitely not all of it. Not exclusive attention.
.
"Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others."
Sometimes. That’s a tricky one to examine. I want to have sex with people who really fucking love sex. Which means people who embrace it and enjoy it. Which means doing it with other people, yeah. And sometimes - but not always - knowing about that, even talking about it, is hot. Depends on your relationship really. |
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"I don’t give a toss about who they’re seeing what they’re doing or if they’re constantly affirming their desire.
I do however, expect the common courtesy of keeping in touch reasonably regularly, so I don’t feel like a human fleshlight x"
This, pretty much. |
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I want their attention when they are talking to me either online or face to face.
I use the word mutual a couple of times in my profile because that's exactly what I'm looking for.
I want them to be interested in me and not just interested in me being interested in them.
I don't get off on them meeting anyone else but at the same time I don't mind if they do just as long as it isn't a numbers game for them. |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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I do like to feel needed and feel as if I'm the only one they're talking to even if they are chatting with others. As soon as I find out they are or feeling like they're potentially choosing someone over me to meet, my brain immediately goes into comparing me with them and think about potential shortcomings I have. So yeah, I do feel a bit needy  |
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"I'm needy. I need to feel desired. If I get a whiff of complacency then they are dead to me.
I don't expect a guy to focus his attention on me 100pc - my assumption is that he is chatting to other women and arranging other meets - but I need to feel that he is into me, not just my orifices"
Paying attention and showing desire should be basic for any connection, physical or otherwise x |
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"I don't want or need all the attention. I assume that most people on here will be meeting/planning to meet others.
However, I do want to feel that they have some genuine interest and not that I'm plan B or C after plan A has fallen through. Constant messages, compliments and affirmations of their desire would feel insincere and cloying, but a light-hearted chat every few days because they enjoy talking to me is necessary for me not to feel like a human wank sock.
"
Nell posted it so I don't have to! Yay.
I do like to feel desired. I have responsive desire so I definitely enjoy someone I'm into being into me. Is that a bit needy? Maybe.
J |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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I like a healthy amount of interaction.. Too much and I'm smothered and my head leaves the conversation.. Too little - well its a fine line between keep 'em keen!
I wouldn't want them to be actively engaging/arranging meets with other females whilst arranging meets with me... It would make me feel devalued somehow?! Hard to explain |
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We prefer the people we are meeting to be somewhat excited to meet us and keep in touch but we don't need constant messaging back and forth.
As someone else has mentioned, we find it off putting when someone has arranged a meet with us but also looking for someone else to meet on same date, it says they are not really keen on us and we politely back out.
A bit of chit chat pre meet is good for assurance that people are likely to turn up as planned. |
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I'm someone who tries to discuss communication preferences openly to avoid misunderstandings.
I've failed to meet someone's communication needs, I got a warning, I did it again, she pulled the plug. That's fair, we were talking a lot then I went AWOL. I was really into her, wonderful person, I hope she is having a ball of a time.
Everyone's needs are different. Needing less communication to be happy is still a need. It's more quality, openness and honesty for me than quantity. Without that there's nothing there for me to feel any ways about. |
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"I like a healthy amount of interaction.. Too much and I'm smothered and my head leaves the conversation.. Too little - well its a fine line between keep 'em keen!
I wouldn't want them to be actively engaging/arranging meets with other females whilst arranging meets with me... It would make me feel devalued somehow?! Hard to explain "
I get exactly what you mean stay focused on the prize you being the prize...... Enough already |
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"Oh, absolutely not.
Want me for sure. Make an active choice and be enthusiastic to see me. Have that happy tease and build up before coming over.
Need? Hard no. Go find something else to depend on. I ain't interested in being the primary focus outside of the time we're physically together
In terms of fab, this is definitely how I feel.
I don’t need to be in constant contact, just a level of interaction and interest.
I don’t care if they’re meeting others, that’s cool and not an issue, so long as I know they’re interested and excited about me too.
Is it very different outside of fab?
If I’m in a romantic relationship with someone, the situation is different
Fair enough. I'm much the same with all of it "
If I’m in a relationship with a person, I want to interact with them more |
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I know as a person how I can be, I do not want to be that person so I don't act like that person but buried in my brain is the desire to feel wanted and to crave it.
Being the baby of ten had its perks but it's ruined my adulthood.
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"I know as a person how I can be, I do not want to be that person so I don't act like that person but buried in my brain is the desire to feel wanted and to crave it.
Being the baby of ten had its perks but it's ruined my adulthood.
- beard
"
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No.
I can be quite business like about it or if with someone I know somewhat more relaxed but I am not needy to the degree that I think of them much before or after..... If that makes me a bad person then it doesn't |
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Depends on the person and what I'm in the mood for.
If someone barely stays in touch and only messages when they're horny, it will depend on how much I want the kind of sex or company.
Sex with my long term partner is always satisfying and we barely talk in between. That's how it's been for 14 years. I don't feel the same about other men who barely talk in between meeting for sex. Out of sight, out of mind, unless I need their dick. |
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Not really, we're all on here for the same/similar reasons I think it would be silly to be too needy in regards to that.
We like a bit of chat beforehand but not too much endless talking, we want something to talk about on the night! 
Miss S x |
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"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?
Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc.
Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?
Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it aswell as arranging to meet you?
Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others.
"
I like a certain amount of attention, yes.
I like messages leading up to the meet, yes. If the messaging tails off, I assume they've found a better offer.
Yes, I need them to impress on me that they want ME not just a hole to satisfy 'cos they're horny.
As I say in my profile, I'd prefer them to prioritise me and not be shagging others. Not a swinger, see!
Definitely not. I'm not that naive that I think they're ONLY shagging me. I just don't want to know about it. |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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"I don’t give a toss about who they’re seeing what they’re doing or if they’re constantly affirming their desire.
I do however, expect the common courtesy of keeping in touch reasonably regularly, so I don’t feel like a human fleshlight x"
I like the tease and build up to seeing someone ....... but don't need constant chat. If it's someone I am going to see more regularly then checking in on each other is good.
What they do with others is their perogative... unless we've agreed exclusivity. |
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I'm not overly fond of people coming across as super excited. Partly because I'm a more chilled person but I also have had experience of a guy gushing about how excited he is and sending me pics the night before to standing me up for our social, blocking me on here and WhatsApp and also deleting the pics he'd been so keen for me to have the night before 
So yeah, a bit dubious and just assume they're blowing smoke up my arse. |
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Dropping a few chats in to touch base during the week is fine by me. I enjoy a healthy balance of sharing thoughts/emotions/what's going on in respective lives. Too little and I'll lose interest, too much and I don't have the physical time to put that level of interest into it
There's never a set script though as that rarely works either |
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I cannot be arsed with all of that
Outside of the actual meet, the more contact we have, the more likely I'll find something to put me off
I'm not particularly interested in back stories
I just thank fuck that I'm bi
More men than women seem to be on the same page regarding meets
I realise the above makes me appear a bit of an arsehole
The sexual me is just a very different being to the human me |
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"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?
Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc.
Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?
Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it aswell as arranging to meet you?
Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others.
"
I don't care who else they meet, but to have the affirmation that they're excited for our meet always feels good |
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"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?
Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc.
Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?
Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it aswell as arranging to meet you?
Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others.
"
If someone chooses me as a base,
Keeps me in the loop
Let’s me look after them
And videos or let’s me watch with other guys then sign me up
Bonus if enjoys rimming or allows clean up duties |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?
Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc.
Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?
Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it aswell as arranging to meet you?
Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others.
"
If this was someone else…. There have stared a thread for each question…….
My answer is - I dunno. I need different things from different people. And as long as they’re alright with the way we are, it can make us both happy.
 |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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I don’t need all of the attention from a potential meet. I do need to feel desires for more than my body. If we are messaging regularly and once a meet has been determined they go silent, I’m quick to go off them.
I do not want them messaging telling me how they can't wait, etc. That seems very dry and boring. Message me to keep in contact, whet the appetite, increase the anticipatory excitement, make me laugh, share some alluring photos, etc. but simply going on and on about the excitement of meeting me bores me.
I do not need constant affirmation they want me. I need to feel desired, as if they’re excited to share a coffee together, explore a potential face to face experience of getting to know one another, partake and share,not just to magically say abs do the “right things” to have a go with me.
I don’t care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever. I don’t need it to be overtly in my face. In some cases, depending on the person, I may find them being desired by others exciting too, and it could lead to getting off on the fact they are fucking others. |
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"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?
Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc.
Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?
Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it aswell as arranging to meet you?
Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others.
"
No too all questions, I'm here for sex and friends and not looking for a life partner. |
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"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?
Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc.
Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?
Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it aswell as arranging to meet you?
Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others.
If this was someone else…. There have stared a thread for each question…….
"
I appreciate that approach, it signals an awareness that it's a complex topic and promotes exploration. A single question tends, especially a closed one, to result in something more akin to a show of hands. Which is fine and all, but I like some meat to sink my teeth into. |
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By *bi HaiveMan 25 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?
Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc.
Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?
Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it aswell as arranging to meet you?
Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others.
"
None of the above applies to me. Even in a relationship.
Constant affirmation and contact is smothering.
From the perspective of a meet I'd just like their attention when they're with me. What happens outside of that is none of my business.
In terms of a relationship? Everyone needs space. Time alone and not to feel the need to be in constant contact, or to have to reply instantly to messages or calls.
Needy isn't a good emotion. |
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"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?
Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc.
Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?
Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it aswell as arranging to meet you?
Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others.
In terms of a relationship? Everyone needs space. Time alone and not to feel the need to be in constant contact, or to have to reply instantly to messages or calls.
"
I agree with this, and yet on the other end of the scale there's emotional neglect, where's the line between the two?
If a partner felt their needs weren't being met I wouldn't automatically dismiss that as being needy. |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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"Are you someone that needs all the attention from a potential meet?
Do you want them messaging you telling you how they can't wait etc etc.
Do you need the constant affirmation they want you?
Do you care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever the hell you call it aswell as arranging to meet you?
Or do you get off on the fact they are fucking others.
If this was someone else…. There have stared a thread for each question…….
I appreciate that approach, it signals an awareness that it's a complex topic and promotes exploration. A single question tends, especially a closed one, to result in something more akin to a show of hands. Which is fine and all, but I like some meat to sink my teeth into."
Oh fuck yeh!!! You are preaching to the converted. |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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"I don’t need all of the attention from a potential meet. I do need to feel desires for more than my body. If we are messaging regularly and once a meet has been determined they go silent, I’m quick to go off them.
I do not want them messaging telling me how they can't wait, etc. That seems very dry and boring. Message me to keep in contact, whet the appetite, increase the anticipatory excitement, make me laugh, share some alluring photos, etc. but simply going on and on about the excitement of meeting me bores me.
I do not need constant affirmation they want me. I need to feel desired, as if they’re excited to share a coffee together, explore a potential face to face experience of getting to know one another, partake and share,not just to magically say abs do the “right things” to have a go with me.
I don’t care if they are arranging other meets/dates/whatever. I don’t need it to be overtly in my face. In some cases, depending on the person, I may find them being desired by others exciting too, and it could lead to getting off on the fact they are fucking others. "
Slightly off topic but we need one of those t-shirts you have in your last picture
Where did you get that from?  |
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All No’s for me.
I would rather than be meeting & fucking other people texting me every five minutes & expecting replies to be honest, it can be exhausting. I just like full attention during the time we are physically together |
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I like attention. It doesn't have to be constant, people have lives and are arranging to meet others as well. I've no problem with that, but I do need them to at least be interested and a show a bit of keenness to meet me. Otherwise why are they bothering? I like to know that the person meeting me isn't only meeting me because they're struggling to meet anyone but I've no desire to know the details of their other meets. I don't bother reading verifications because of this. So yes. Needy in that I need the person to want to meet me enough to show a bit of interest and respect I guess. |
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"I like attention. It doesn't have to be constant, people have lives and are arranging to meet others as well. I've no problem with that, but I do need them to at least be interested and a show a bit of keenness to meet me. Otherwise why are they bothering? I like to know that the person meeting me isn't only meeting me because they're struggling to meet anyone but I've no desire to know the details of their other meets. I don't bother reading verifications because of this. So yes. Needy in that I need the person to want to meet me enough to show a bit of interest and respect I guess. "
There needs to be that need and desire to meet
But the true value of it is if it stays or disappears after first meet
Only then will you know if genuine |
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