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to cheat or not to cheat!!
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By *am123 OP Man
over a year ago
essex chelmsford |
you would assume if you are into swinging, that you have a more relaxed, liberal attitude toward sex. So would that help you with forgiving your partner, if u caught him/her cheating, given you probably have seen him fuck other women in front of you?.
Or is it the trust issue that would hurt more than the actual act of sex???  |
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By *am123 OP Man
over a year ago
essex chelmsford |
"you would assume if you are into swinging, that you have a more relaxed, liberal attitude toward sex. So would that help you with forgiving your partner, if u caught him/her cheating, given you probably have seen him fuck other women in front of you?.
Or is it the trust issue that would hurt more than the actual act of sex??? "
thats seen him her fuck other men/ women in front of you too keep this fair  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Swinging with a partnee/spouse/lover is all about trust and mutual enjoyment. If that trust is broken then its the same as any relationship regardless of attitudes towards sex... |
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it isn't the sex it's the deceit entailed in getting the sex. The lies about where you are, what you're doing, who you're with.
Speaking purely for ourselves swinging means being 100% honest we know that we are going to be having sex with other people...hell we look forward to it...and neither of us is telling the other one lies. |
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If I was swinging with a partner and they cheated, it would be even worse, in a way. I'd feel extra betrayed because they'd know they could have sex with other people if they wanted, yet decided to keep it a secret. |
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By *am123 OP Man
over a year ago
essex chelmsford |
"Do you mean swinging couples, one goes it alone without telling the other??
"
yes but not just in swinging could be just seeing some out side of the swinging scene you were in.
to the other ,cheating is cheating i agree but the question is whether it would be easier to forgive ?? |
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I had a fuck buddy who was fucking the wife of a couple we had met. This was behind my back and he lied about it and various other things. Had he told me he wanted to see her, I would have given him the green light. The lies and deception really upset me much more than the fact he was fucking her behind my back. God knows if the hubby knew either. |
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By *am123 OP Man
over a year ago
essex chelmsford |
"it isn't the sex it's the deceit entailed in getting the sex. The lies about where you are, what you're doing, who you're with.
Speaking purely for ourselves swinging means being 100% honest we know that we are going to be having sex with other people...hell we look forward to it...and neither of us is telling the other one lies."
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By *am123 OP Man
over a year ago
essex chelmsford |
"If I was swinging with a partner and they cheated, it would be even worse, in a way. I'd feel extra betrayed because they'd know they could have sex with other people if they wanted, yet decided to keep it a secret. "
good answers |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you mean swinging couples, one goes it alone without telling the other??
yes but not just in swinging could be just seeing some out side of the swinging scene you were in.
to the other ,cheating is cheating i agree but the question is whether it would be easier to forgive ?? "
Impossible to forgive. Same as talkingstove said. If you're swingers and it's allowed, it seems much worse to me if they then cheat in secret. |
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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago
In a crisp poke on the A814 |
"Do you mean swinging couples, one goes it alone without telling the other??
yes but not just in swinging could be just seeing some out side of the swinging scene you were in.
to the other ,cheating is cheating i agree but the question is whether it would be easier to forgive ?? "
No, wouldnt make any difference.
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"I had a fuck buddy who was fucking the wife of a couple we had met. This was behind my back and he lied about it and various other things. Had he told me he wanted to see her, I would have given him the green light. The lies and deception really upset me much more than the fact he was fucking her behind my back. God knows if the hubby knew either."
Why was it any of your business? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"it isn't the sex it's the deceit entailed in getting the sex. The lies about where you are, what you're doing, who you're with.
Speaking purely for ourselves swinging means being 100% honest we know that we are going to be having sex with other people...hell we look forward to it...and neither of us is telling the other one lies."
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had a fuck buddy who was fucking the wife of a couple we had met. This was behind my back and he lied about it and various other things. Had he told me he wanted to see her, I would have given him the green light. The lies and deception really upset me much more than the fact he was fucking her behind my back. God knows if the hubby knew either.
Why was it any of your business?"
|
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"I had a fuck buddy who was fucking the wife of a couple we had met. This was behind my back and he lied about it and various other things. Had he told me he wanted to see her, I would have given him the green light. The lies and deception really upset me much more than the fact he was fucking her behind my back. God knows if the hubby knew either."
I can understand if you were partners but the thing with bed buddies is that what they do is up to them as they don't owe you anything. I am sure you felt hurt but he thought that he had no ties to you hence doing what he pleased... Thats the thing with bed buddies is that you don't have ties to each other... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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if you love someone and they make you happy then you might get annoyed with them, married couples get annoyed with each other all the time over the most trivual things.
i think you could forgive them for that.
nobody perfect we all do things we shouldnt do sometimes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I was swinging with a partner and they cheated, it would be even worse, in a way. I'd feel extra betrayed because they'd know they could have sex with other people if they wanted, yet decided to keep it a secret. "
This is what happened to me and as you rightly say it is worse because we had an open relationship .... or so I thought  |
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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago
In a crisp poke on the A814 |
"if you love someone and they make you happy then you might get annoyed with them, married couples get annoyed with each other all the time over the most trivual things.
i think you could forgive them for that.
nobody perfect we all do things we shouldnt do sometimes."
Annoyed with them?
Trivial?
Id be feckin raging!!!!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"if you love someone and they make you happy then you might get annoyed with them, married couples get annoyed with each other all the time over the most trivual things.
i think you could forgive them for that.
nobody perfect we all do things we shouldnt do sometimes.
Annoyed with them?
Trivial?
Id be feckin raging!!!!! "
I would NEVER forgive, id be furious!
They'd hit that gutter faster than they could blink!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"if you love someone and they make you happy then you might get annoyed with them, married couples get annoyed with each other all the time over the most trivual things.
i think you could forgive them for that.
nobody perfect we all do things we shouldnt do sometimes."
It's not trivial at all!  |
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See lying isn't trivial, any good relationship is based on trust doesn't matter what type of relationship it is, friends, partners, husband and wife. A lie leads to more lies and if you don't have enough respect for someone to level with them about important things then the relationship is based on very shaky ground.
However if I came home with a seriously dodgy haircut I would expect Mr N to lie through his teeth about it  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When swinging as a loving couple (not friends with benefits) trust and respect for each other is of the utmost importance and once it's gone you have nothing. Swinging is liberating and an experience you can enjoy sharing, so it really baffles me that some halves of some couples can still justify trying to arrange solo meets and cheat when that can essentially fuck who they want anyway |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When swinging as a loving couple (not friends with benefits) trust and respect for each other is of the utmost importance and once it's gone you have nothing. Swinging is liberating and an experience you can enjoy sharing, so it really baffles me that some halves of some couples can still justify trying to arrange solo meets and cheat when that can essentially fuck who they want anyway "
Cuckhold and playing solo with permission is still a again a different matter |
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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago
In a crisp poke on the A814 |
"See lying isn't trivial, any good relationship is based on trust doesn't matter what type of relationship it is, friends, partners, husband and wife. A lie leads to more lies and if you don't have enough respect for someone to level with them about important things then the relationship is based on very shaky ground.
However if I came home with a seriously dodgy haircut I would expect Mr N to lie through his teeth about it "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"if you love someone and they make you happy then you might get annoyed with them, married couples get annoyed with each other all the time over the most trivual things.
i think you could forgive them for that.
nobody perfect we all do things we shouldnt do sometimes.
It's not trivial at all! "
no but i am just saying, thats what couples do argue about trivual things. |
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"if you love someone and they make you happy then you might get annoyed with them, married couples get annoyed with each other all the time over the most trivual things.
i think you could forgive them for that.
nobody perfect we all do things we shouldnt do sometimes.
It's not trivial at all!
no but i am just saying, thats what couples do argue about trivual things."
I NEVER argue about trivial things, who left the cap off the toothpaste is NOT trivial |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
It's not trivial at all!
no but i am just saying, thats what couples do argue about trivual things.
Singles would argue about trivial things if anyone was there to listen "
Lucky for them they are single then. |
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